How "Lucky" Am I?

"Baby, come on. We haven't had sex in months. What is wrong with you?"

"I'm sorry Mel. I have a lot going on. I'm trying to slay a dragon, but the fucker won't die."

Yes, I know. Double Entendre. But she didn't catch it. She simply pouted playfully and wrapped her arms around my neck.

"Please kill this fucker and return to me baby. I REALLY need you to ravage the princess. I'm on the verge of begging."

Then she let me go and sauntered over to the door. She stopped, turned her head seductively, and playfully added, "But if you want me to beg, I will Mr. Worthy." With that she left, leaving me hard as a rock yet sick as a cancer patient.

You see, its shit like that leaves me confused. She pretends like she is so in love with me. She pretends that she wants me. Yet she goes out and fucks that asshole Mark. What the fuck?

The next few days were about as much fun as getting a prostate exam. I felt like I was in a time warp. Life around me zipped by while I crawled through the quagmire of my marriage. The Worthy household became a place to be avoided. But I wasn't the only one that felt this way. My kids found other places to be. My wife worked longer hours, or so she told me. I also tried to stay gone as much as possible.

Despite my initial gusto, I avoided listening to and watching the recordings. I began to panic when I thought about what I would find on them. It's one thing to know that your wife is cheating on you. It's another thing to SEE your wife cheating on you. Once I listened and watched, there would be no going back.

I finally manned the fuck up, locked myself in my office one afternoon, and surveyed the damage.

The first interesting piece that I found came from the audio and video recordings from the living room the night that the trio returned home from Las Vegas. I was surprised to have anything this soon after they returned. They'd been together all weekend so I just assumed that Melony came straight home when she returned, but it appears that she visited her lover and her best friend first.

Mel's voice: "Okay Tasha. I have to go home now. You know Jake is lost without me. He's been without me for a whole weekend. He needs his daily dose of 'momma' time."

Tasha's voice: "Oh God! You had to ruin a perfect weekend by mentioning the imp. CAN YOU STOP TALKING ABOUT HIM FOR 5 GODDAMN MINUTES?"

Mark's voice: "Honestly Mel. What the fuck do you see in him?

Mel's voice: "If you two are just gonna start bashing my husband again, save it. We had a fun weekend and I don't want to be pissed at you two."

Tasha's voice: "Whatever."

In the video I saw Mark shaking his head and go into the other room. Tasha looked at Mel from across the living room and I swear there was pain in her eyes. Mel closed the space between them; grabbed Tasha softly by both cheeks, and pulled her in for a passionate kiss that rivaled any one she ever gave me. The two made out for a few seconds, and then Tasha suddenly pulled away.

Mel's voice: "Come on baby. Don't be like that."

Tasha's voice: "Don't you kiss me like that when you are going home to be with HIM. If you don't want me to talk bad about that fucking Umpa Lumpa that you MARRIED, then you need to get the fuck out of here." Her voice was so fill with anger and deep agony that I felt it. Even through the monitor and the speakers I knew what she was feeling. It was the anger of love not returned. At least not to the magnitude that it was given.

I hated this bitch's guts, but we were more alike than either of us realized. Now I understood why she loathed me all of these years. Looking back, I can see her fighting Melony's growing affection for me. Subconsciously, I hated her for the same reason. I just didn't know it until now. We both shared the aching pain that became so great that it curdled into unbridled hatred. All because we both loved someone who loved someone else.

As Mel pulled her in for another kiss, I saw Tasha begin to melt. The anger began to seep out of her and was replaced with desire. Damn, Melony had the same effect on Tasha that she had on me! She was able to morph your world into becoming what she wanted it to be. You saw what she wanted you to see. She made you believe that half of her was enough for all of you.

It wasn't until I heard Mark's voice booming from the other room that the final pixel fell into place.

"Why don't we get some food in here? I'm so hungry I could eat a fucking horse!"

My world stopped when I heard that. My mind flashed back to the day that Mel first broke my heart. I was on her doorstep back in college. Her hair was all messed up and that fucking voice came from the other room. It was Mark's voice!

Lois Lane List

Tasha and Mel have been "roommates" all of this time. I think that we can safely replace roommates with lovers.

Tasha has hated my fucking guts since day one. Maybe she knew how Mel felt about me from the beginning.

Mark turned into an asshole when Mel started to date me. His little threesome was in danger of falling apart.

My son looks just like Mark. No description necessary.

Mel suggested we move into a bigger house that was across town, but did not sell the condo. She wanted Tasha to move in, but wanted me as far away as possible so that she can keep her two worlds "separate but equal".

Tasha said that Mel would never be with me because she needed more than my "Vienna sausage". Yeah, she needed some fish taco.

It all came together at once. Mel has been fucking Tasha and Mark since back in college!

As I watched the screen in front of me, I saw a loving relationship between two women. It wasn't me she was cheating on with Tasha. It was Tasha that she was cheating on with me. I may have married her, but she was Tasha's long before I entered the picture. The kids, the house, the marriage, it was all a lie. Tasha was the one living with the broken heart of a person who was in love with someone that chose someone else.

That's when I hit the floor with a thud.

I was awakened to the sound of my employees banging on my door and yelling my name. As my vision cleared and the room came into view, the door burst open and my people came flooding in to my aid.

"Are you okay Mr. Worthy? Do we need to dial 911? Step back! Give him some air!"

I assured everyone that I was okay. They pandered around, bringing me water and whatnot until I was able to convince them that my health was not in jeopardy. Slowly they all meandered out back to their stations.

I didn't bother watching and listening to any more. I had all that I needed. I didn't need to actually see them engaging in a ménage a toi. I had more than enough to withstand any lie that Mel could tell me to allow me to live in denial any longer. Besides that, didn't think that I could stomach it. I would probably just pass out again and cause my employees to rush me to the emergency room.

The time of reckoning was here. I couldn't procrastinate with this anymore. I couldn't close my eyes and stay in the twilight zone. I had to confront this new truth. The truth.

I went home early and set things up a little show and tell. I gathered the evidence that I'd acquired and organized it. One thing I know about Melony is that she appreciates organization. I told the kids to make themselves scarce this evening because Mom and I had to talk. They looked a little scared by the way I was acting, so I assured them that everything would be fine and that I just wanted some alone time with my wife. I purposely plant seeds in their heads that this was a romantic gesture, but I didn't say it outright. What, you don't think that Mel is the only one who can manipulate the truth, do you?

With that in mind they eagerly made plans to stay the night at some friend's house. I think that they felt that this was the sun coming out in the Worthy household. Things were going to get back to normal. I did feel guilty about raising their hopes for something that was not likely to happen, but I felt it was the lesser evil of having to live through what was going to be an excruciating discussion. At least, that's how I justified it in my head. I'm sure the truth lies more in the fact that I couldn't bear to see their hurt faces when they learn of the truth. I would rather let Mel have that discussion with me nowhere in sight. God, I was going to miss them!

With everything in place I waited for Mel to get home. Like always, she was right on time.

"Jake, baby! Are you home?"

I met her in the foyer of our ridiculously large house. I used to like its size. Now that I knew why she chose it I find it a bit ostentatious.

"There's my man!" She sang as she walked up to me and embraced me in a loving hug. When I didn't return it she stepped back and looked at me curiously.

"Where are the kids?" she said with a hint of worry in her voice.

"I told them to find somewhere to be for a while. I told them that I needed time with you alone."

A look of relief and a smile spread across her face. Then, her look turned playful and seductive.

"Oh my Mr. Worthy. Why did you send everyone else away? Are you going to spank me again?" She said breathlessly, doing her best Marilyn Monroe impression. Very slowly and softly, she slid her hand down my stomach until she reached my cock and gently massaged it through my pants.

Unfortunately for her, I was nowhere near in the mood think about sex, let alone get an erection. All I had to think about was Mark grunting behind her while she licked Tasha's pussy. I grabbed her by her shoulders and pushed her back.

"No Mel. We need to really talk."

Her face changed instantly. Melony the skillful seductress disappeared and was replaced by someone who, for the first time in her life, was not in control. She looked utterly afraid. Good.

I led her into the living room where I'd carefully arranged my visuals. I had my laptop, I had a folder next to it, and a set of keys laying on top of the folder.

These items, much like the "luck" in my life, seemed innocent if just taken at a glance. They are just three separate items that are initially harmless. But if you are a person of many secrets and lies, seeing them there together can be unsettling. They indicate that a person has information. If you are one who likes to control information, your worst nightmare is not knowing what the other person does know. Right away she could tell that something had been let out of the bag.

I let her stew for a couple of seconds while I enjoyed this new control that I had. Then I slowly proceeded. I began by handing her the folder.

"Do you know what's in that folder?" That was a rhetorical question. Of course she didn't know, but I assumed that she had an idea.

"I hired a private detective Mel. I had a team follow you for two weeks."

Mel just stood there, rooted to her spot like a tree. I found it very telling that she didn't ask why I would have a detective follow her.

She opened the folder and began to leaf through the documents. The first thing she saw was pictures. Each one she saw filled her with a little more relief. I noticed some of her bravado returning to her. The detectives didn't get any evidence of actual infidelity when they followed her. They just got a few things that made me think. The only thing in the pictures was Tasha, Mark, and Mel hanging out. She knew that I was already aware that she hung out with them from time to time, so she began to relax a little.

Then she read the report of how much of her day she spent with Tasha and Mark on a daily basis. Worry lines began to form on her forehead again when she came across the description of how long she was at the condo, or for the fact that I now knew that the condo was still in the picture.

It was the last page that I had in there that delivered the final blow. That's where I placed the DNA results for Alexis and me.

She dropped the folder and screamed. I don't even think she actually read the results. She already knew what they were. The fact that they were there in the report let her know that I KNEW.

"Oh my God!"

While her world crashed around her, I booted up the laptop and pulled up the program that had the recordings on it.

"While you were having your sex filled weekend in Vegas with your girlfriend and boyfriend, I planted cameras and mics in your condo. You know, the secret one that share with your lovers."

"Jake..."

"Would you like me to pull up the recordings?"

"Jake please..."

"WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO PULL UP THE RECORDINGS?!"

Her answer was her breaking down in loud sobs and crumpling to the floor. I didn't play the recordings. For one, I didn't want to hear that shit. For another, we both knew what I knew. Listening to and watching what I had would have just been superfluous.

Watching her on the floor crying like that broke me down. I flopped down on the couch hard, like my body suddenly lost energy. The past few months had exhausted me. The tears that I'd held in forced their way out. The damn was broken, and the village was underwater. We both sat there and cried; I sat on the couch and she sat on the floor. We simply sat there and let it all out.

"Jake...I'm so sorry. I never wanted you to find out this way."

I had to laugh at that. It wasn't real laugh. It was more like a sarcastic scoff.

"How did you expect me to find out? You sure as hell weren't going to tell me."

Eventually, we talked about THE TRUTH. Most of it was information that I already knew. She and Tasha were lovers in college before she met me. She tried dating guys but none of them really did it for her. She never found sex as fulfilling with guys as she did with women. In fact, the only time she enjoyed sex with a guy was when she was with Mark and Tasha, and when she was with me.

"I don't know why I enjoyed sex with you. I just did. You were different from other guys. I felt the same connection with you when we made love that I did with Tasha."

"Why lie to me Mel? Why did you ask me to marry you? YOU ASKED ME! You could've just left me alone instead of dragging me through your shit for all of these years. WHY MEL?!"

"Because I love you Jake. I asked you to marry me because I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life. I couldn't stand the thought of life without you."

"But you love her too." Tears streamed her face once again and she nodded her head.

"So you just thought that you could have both of us? Is that right Mel?" Once again she gave me a nod.

I jumped up off of the couch and started to pace around the living room. I placed my hands in back of my head and tried to breathe slowly. The fucking audacity of this bitch! She actually thinks that she could have me, a woman, and another man on the side. But hell, she'd already gotten away with it for 16 years.

"What about Mark? How does he fit into this picture? Do you love him too?"

She shook her head and sniffled. "I'm fond of Mark. He's a good guy. We have...fun. I've known him since college. He was just lucky enough to be in the right place at the right time. I dated him for a week or so. Tasha and I included him in our sex games one night. We had so much fun that it just stuck throughout the years. But I don't love him. If he left tomorrow I would miss him, but I wouldn't try to convince him to stay."

"That's kind of a harsh thing to say about the father of your kids."

Yes, I was waiting for the right time to plug that in. Out of this whole debacle, that was the piece that hurt the most.

"Do you know what you did to me Mel? Do you realize how much you have stolen from me?"

Rhetorical, I know. But I was on a roll.

"I had two loving kids that were miracles to me. I had a loving wife who was only mine. I was the luckiest man on earth. YOU STOLE THAT! You made me believe that lie for all of these years. Now, I am a man with no kids and a bi-sexual wife who has a whole other life outside of me. You stole SIXTEEN years of my life. YOU TRICKED ME MEL!"

Her only response was loud sobs.

"Why did you propose to me Mel?"

"BECAUSE I WANTED TO BE WITH YOU! Don't you get it Jake? I wanted you. Tasha wanted me to leave you, but I couldn't do that. I tried to get her to replace Mark with you. I wanted US to be in the relationship with her. But she hated you. She told me she would rather die than share me with you. Then she gave me an ultimatum. She wanted me to make a choice between the two of you. I CHOSE YOU. That's why I proposed to you. That was me making my choice. THAT'S WHY SHE MOVED OUT!"

"Then what happened?"

"She came back about a month after we were married. She said that she tried to live without me and she couldn't. She told me that if she had to share me with you, then she would. She said that she wouldn't be with you like she was with Mark, but she wouldn't live without me anymore. She didn't care that I was married. She said that I was hers, and that she just had to accept the extra baggage that came with me."

"So, even though you were married to ME, you started back fucking your girlfriend and your boyfriend because she was willing to accept your 'extra baggage'. And by extra baggage I mean your husband whom you stood up with in front of a church and swore to forsake all others. Do I understand this clearly?"

I guess hearing me say it out loud with so much sarcasm and venom sounded worse than it did in her head. She began to shrink back even more, if that were possible.

"When did you realize that the kids weren't mine?"

After all of this, that was the question that I needed to know the most. How long were you lying to me about the kids?

"I suspected when they were born, but I didn't want it to be true. I ignored it until Alex played little league. Looking at him in that jersey..."

And that was all she got out. No more was said. The only sounds were of her crying and my love dying. Not just my love of her. My love of LIFE.

"Mel, I think you should go to your condo."

EPILOGUE:

We were divorced a year later. She did go to her condo that night, but then she returned with a mission of her own. She pulled out all stops trying to convince me to that she really did love me. She did everything except tell me that she would leave Tasha. How selfish do you have to be to feel as though you should convince someone to share you?

Eventually, she accepted the fact that we were past the point of no return. She conceded to the divorce and didn't protest it. She even made it easier. She told her lawyer that didn't want anything from me. Even though my business was still growing I was making twice as much as I made when we lived together. Because we lived in a no-fault state, she could have taken a pretty sizeable chunk. She said that she loved me enough to let me go. She just wanted me to be free.

The news devastated the twins. They were victims of the same lie that I was. They begged and pleaded me not to go, but I couldn't stay. Today's truth was too much to bear.

Even though I couldn't stay, they were still MY KIDS! Like I said before, truth is a matter of perspective. I raised them, I clothed them, and I LOVED them. Fuck Mark. They were mine.

They were angry at their mother for a long time. They didn't disown her or call her a slut, but they began to act up and do things that would ruin their future. Because of that, I put on my Dad hat and stepped in. For one, I didn't trust Mark to be the dad that they needed. I wasn't going to see these two beautiful kids ruined because their mother couldn't make up her mind on whether she was gay or not.

It took a lot of work and forgiveness, but they are on the right track now. They are both going to college in the fall. Alex got a full ride to the University of Florida. He's going to be a Gator. Alexis was accepted into Yale and is going to be a Surgeon.

Mel moved back into her condo with her lovers when she left that night after we talked. They made it work for a while, but the threesome quickly died down to a couple. With Mel back in her life, Tasha was not sharing her with ANYONE, including Mark. Eventually, the jobless mooch was released back into the wild to be with others of his kind.