Howl at the Moon - Henry's Story

(I would like to dedicate it to all of those who have died from cancer, especially my friends--Sharon, Steve, Mrs. Summers and Christina.)

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"It's deep, so deep they can't reach it...can they." questioned Sioban. She fanned her sparse remaining hair out over the bed and looked away from him at the wall. It hurt Henry to see his wife like this. He was crying but she was beyond tears. Sioban had done her crying, bargaining, her pleading to the Heavens. Now there was nothing left but the bitter acceptance of her fate.

"Would it help if we went to a vet?" she questioned. But, her faint voice trembled and was without hope. She already knew the answer.

Henry let out a bitter laugh full of contempt----not at his wife, but at life. If only they could do that, if only going to a veterinarian was the solution, if only it were that simple, for once being a werewolf would be helpful instead of a curse. If...only...if only...if only...

"No." he said as he despondantly, shook his head. "Here, in Wyoming, the vets would probably put you out of your misery without my permission. They'd say it would be the humane thing." Henry wished he had a better answer for Sioban, his wife, his love, his true mate but he didn't. He only had the hard, uncaring facts.

Henry only had the bitter and brutally honest truth. As a doctor, there should be something he could do---anything. But, all his medical knowledge was useless. The cold hard fact was that his Sioban was dying. The brain cancer was just too deep. There was no way around it. No miracle cure.There was nothing to do but wait.

"Oh" said Sioban heartbreakingly. She had already known the answer but asked the question anyway. That way, even for a brief second, there was a chance of hope. Henry could be content, escape the Hell they'd been living in for the past year and a half. Henry laughed bitterly again at life and sat next to Sioban on their marriage bed. He curled up next to her, laid his head on her lap, wanting to protect her from the inevitable. She embraced her husband, protecting him at the same time.

Probably the hardest thing for her now, was the loss of her hair due to chemo. She'd always done her long hair up in complicated designs. It was her pride and joy, she could hang it out the window and both peasant women and queens would be jealous of it's shimmer and gleam. Now his Sioban was losing more and more, day by day.

Henry knew Sioban thought she no longer looked beautiful. It didn't matter to him though. He'd seen her puking and coughing blood from the chemo. He'd suffered along with her. It cut him to his core to see his love, his true mate, in this much pain. He was a doctor, he should be able to do something and yet he was so powerless.

"Come here baby." said Sioban sweetly as she pulled Henry tighter into her breast. "It'll be alright." she said to him, lying but needing...wanting...wishing... it to be true. If she said it perhaps it could be true, some impossible cosmic miracle.

Henry gently lay on top of Sioban. They weren't fucking, they weren't having sex, they weren't making love. Sioban and Henry were doing something deeper than that. Only a couple who'd been together centuries like them could understand what they were doing as they moved against each other. Caressing their lover's body which they knew so well, tender kisses and soft touches. The lovers merged together. Kissing, hugging, being together as one entity.

As she moved in sync with Henry, Sioban was apologizing for dying, for not being able to be with Henry...for her light going out. Henry was also apologizing as he pleasured his true mate's body. He was apologizing for not being able to protect her, for no longer being able to be with her.

The couple melted together, apologizing for all the little pointless squabbles that build up between married couples. The ebbs instead of flows within their long marriage. Sioban had lost all her beautiful hair, she was emaciated to the bone but none of that mattered to Henry. Sioban was his---his true mate and he loved her more than anything.

"I lied to you, Henry and I'm sorry about it. If I didn't lie we could've been together longer." said Sioban as tears came to her eyes. She still peppered him with kisses. Thinking only of her Henry.

"How'd you lie to me sweetie?" questioned Henry. He was gently tracing her emaciated body with his fingers, softly kissing and worshiping his true mate, his true love.

"I knew I loved you, that you were my true mate from the minute I saw you by that lake. You must remember that day, I know I do, I'll never forget...anyways I was selfish. I made you court me for three years because I like being courted. Flowers, poems, music all of that...I'm sorry Henry. If I hadn't been so selfish we could have had more time together." apologized Sioban as she nuzzled against Henry's cheek. He kissed away her tears.

Henry lay his head upon Sioban's chest. He could hear her heart. It strongly beat in and out. Henry was ashamed when he realized it wouldn't be beating for much longer. She ran her hands through his hair. "I'm sorry." she repeated. Sioban was trying to say that she was sorry for so much more than a longer courtship. She was trying to say sorry for leaving him alone. She was trying to say sorry for all the ebbs, rather than flows, in their long marriage.She was sorry for having to say goodbye.

It was a moment of eternity, a moment they both wanted to linger. Both Henry and Sioban knew that without each other, they were nothing, The couple just held each other close listening to one another's breathing. Listening to one another's beating hearts. Being a single entity, in a moment frozen in tie.

Henry was out weeding the garden, when she passed. Sioban had always loved her garden and now it had gone wild. Scrub and thorns percolated the once carefully tendered and much loved flower patch. Her beloved roses were wilting...dying... in the scorching summer sun. Henry had an impossible, impractical belief that if he brought his true mate the perfect rose. She would somehow miraculously survive. Sioban would get better, if..if...if..only he could find the perfect rose to save his love. It was a childish hope, impossible...but that childish hope was better than the despair that had filled their lives of late.

Henry never found the rose for Sioban, her garden patch was too inhospitable to anything but brambles and thorns. At long last Henry bitterly sighed. He knew he had let his wife, his true mate, down. It was his fault. He hadn't been able to save her.There was no perfect rose to find. There was no solution. There was no miracle. There was no cure.

There were only the cold and cruel facts of life. Tears started to form in Henry's eyes as he finally gave up and went inside. He was a doctor but he couldn't save his love. He had never felt so powerless in his long life.

Sioban was slumped over in her easy chair. She'd been in the middle of knitting. Henry knew right away that she was dead. But, ran over to check her pulse anyway. Even though Henry had known his true mate's death was a long time in coming, he could hardly stand it. He fell to his knees, laid his head in her lap and sobbed like a small child. It was unfair! It was unfair! It was unfair! It shouldn't happen. How could it happen? How could the universe do this to him?

No...that wasn't the question, he had committed wrongs in his life...how could the universe, the fates...whatever unknown deity was in charge do this to his Sioban? She had never harmed anyone or wished harm on them. She placed everyone before herself. How could this have happened? How could this have happened? How could this have happened?

Henry didn't know how long he kneeled there with his head in his deceased wife's lap, crying unceasingly. It could have been a few minutes, hours or even a few days. He just wanted to linger with his Sioban for a bit longer. He couldn't give her up. Not yet. She had been his wife, his love, his true mate. She had given Henry his whole world and now he had nothing left...not even hope.

----The End

(This was a difficult story to write on many levels. I'd like to dedicate this to all the people who have died from cancer and those who love them. I also love to hear from my readers. I know it had no sex in it, but you can find plenty of sex on this site. Please rate and comment.)