Huzzie 01

Huzzie 01

[Vroom, vroom, slow down, pull over, park, walk clump, walk clump, walk clump]

"Jason, I don't quite understand what happened at your auto customization shop this afternoon, so?"

"(Tee he) are you having trouble operating the ground effects lighting system that we installed under your truck from your phone App then, Huzzie? I mean, they look fine to me, tee he, so?"

[Blue ground effects chassis lights on]

"Oh, I'm not an expert yet with that, but I managed to get them turned on and I think the alternating color setting is pretty cool, but that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the three peeping heads that were burning holes in my backside with their eyes while you and I were going through the App functions on my phone, so, what the hell was all that about, hmm?"

"(Tee he) three peeping heads, Huzzie, tee he?"

"Oh, yeah, you know, three heads, all lined up as low, middle and upper peepers from around the corner! Which I'm guessing are the same three heads that represent your crew who are just behind you right now, so, let's hear your side of the story then, go!"

"Oh, and should I start with how you walked into my auto customization shop in that dress then, Huzzie, hmm? You know, the dress that Charlie noted as having dangling and swinging tassels hanging from it, hmm?"

"(Tee he)"

"Ahem, fringe, swaying fringes. And which of the three peeping heads from earlier is Charlie?"

"And then Martin said that your costume dress looked like it fit like the skin on a grape and..."

"(Tee he)"

"Ahem, fitted, a fitted costume dress. And which of the three peeping heads from earlier is Martin?"

"And then maybe I myself noted that your deerskin Pocahontas costume dress had 68 swaying and swinging fringe string things all the way around your thighs and..."

"Jason! It's suede, but you got the fringe count right, so."

"(Tee he)"

"And then Frank ended up installing a mid-level package ground effects lighting system under your truck and for half price of the basic version that you requested and..."

"Oh, and with a tracker too, I assume, Frank! And which of the three peeping heads from earlier is Frank?"

"(Tee he)"

"And then, I mean, maybe I dared you to wear your fancy dress tonight on the Strip and here you are, all decked out in a tan suede Pocahantas style warrior dress with swinging and swaying fringe string things with fancy under carriage lighting on your fancy truck, so, everybody wins, tee he, Huzzie!"

Oh, I didn't see all those "winners" folks! I saw four guys going all "tee he" and stuff!

Well, my truck looked cool, so that might have been a win.

Anyways, hey there, hey, I'm Huzzie and I'm the one with the fancy under carriage light package on my truck and I like to think of myself as playful and being playful is exactly the same as purposely swaying the dangling fringe strings around and around when you felt and could count, the number of eyes that were boring a hole in the back of my suede dress at the Auto Customization Shop at the south end of the Strip while I was being serviced. Well, not that kind of servicing, but Jason sure took his sweet time showing me just how the lighting system operates from my phone App and the little control box that he slid inside of the cubby hole of my center console.

And by the way, I already planned on wearing my costume dress out that Friday night, so, that wasn't a win for Jason either. But I let him think it was a dare win for him. And only because Jason did seem to have my back a little bit back in school.

And yes folks, I figured out who Charlie was by his "tee he" and then I figured out who Martin was by his "tee he" and Frank was easy to figure just from his demeanor and his eyes and his "tee he" and Frank is on the naughty list since he was the one who was under my truck installing the strips of lights and you know, peeking up my costume dress just as much as he was doing anything else.

And I'll take half of the heat for not moving away from his little ground level roller rolling thing that he laid on, but I thought upskirt peeping was just a myth. And even though it was a tad disgusting, I mean, it was a first for me, so half of that was on me.

But, LOL, I think it confirmed that the program I had been on for almost two years was working!

[Walk clump, walk clump, walk clump]

"Jason, who from your crew knows what then, hmm?"

"Huzzie, I never let out what secrets your hallway locker contained back in school, so, why would I start now, huh?"

Oh, BS! There was only one person back then who could have stolen and then leaked my "towel boy" selfie that I took in the gym locker mirror! But nothing bad happened, so. Also, boyfriend style undies over a thong rule for me!

"Martin, middle peeping head, Martin, I wouldn't mind another review of the App operations on my phone for the chassis lights and a Frozen Swirl Freeze, so?"

[Twist, swirl, twist, sway, twist, swing]

"Oh, oh, let's get with it then, Huzzie!"

[Flips key fob into the air and sashays to the truck, Martin follows like a puppy dog]

I mean, guys like me have to fake the sashay walk, but with practice, it's somewhat doable.

"Ah-ahh, ahh, ahh, Martin, not so fast, I mean, a costume dress like this is designed to have upper risings and I'm wearing a stuffed bra to support it and smooth out its shape, so?"

Oh, and two years on a program, right? An amazing body, in my opinion, but just little puffy nipples up top, which hasn't done much more than prevent me from going topless or wearing a thin t-shirt only. And I'm a little afraid that's all I'm going to get according to some feedback from Chang.

"Aha, aha, aha, so, a lot of girls are flat and stuff their bras, Huzzie! Let's get with it, aha, aha, aha! And I'm driving your fancy truck since you flipped me your key fob, right?"

[Truck doors open and oops, hold please]

"And most girls have three places for a boyfriend and I only have two places, so?"

[Truck door starts to close, wait, counting, one, two, wait, what?]

"Huzzie, wait, what?"

"Sorry, Martin, but that's the way it is. What's under the fringe in the back comes with a different type of fringe package in the front, so?"

An amazing ass, I say, in the back! In my opinion.

And an amazing way to kill a possible Frozen Swirl Freeze date!

[Hands back the key fob, lowers head and shakes it back and forth as Martin walks back to the sidewalk]

Anyways, his hair so much cuter when he shook it wildly back and forth as he stepped back towards the sidewalk.

"So, Mr. Frank, you're disgusting, but you got a real good peek up my dress earlier while you were pretending to finish the wiring for my ground effect lights, so, are things so bad all up in there then, hmm?"

"Aww, no, Huzzie! I spied a perfect bucket seat and the gear shifter seemed to be a lot more like a push button transmission than anything and as soon as I figure out how to stop having such a disgusting attitude, I mean, hot wiring your power bucket seats is on my list, Huzzie! And by the way, what was with the two black band aids then, huh? Is that a thing? Is that your thing?"

"Oh, those were just for a couple of photos, so?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, photo's up that high then?"

[Lifts fringes and the dress seam, just a little, showing about half of the angled black band aids on inner thighs]

"They're not that high up, tee he, right, Frank?"

"Hubba, hubba, hubba! I'm reformed, Huzzie! I'm reformed! A Frozen Swirl Freeze, you say? I'm buying!"

Nope, he's still to disgusting, but I felt for him, so.

"Well, here, I have a fresh band aid for your thumb where you screwed a sheet metal screw into it since you were paying more attention to the position of my selfie band aids than you were where you were screwing that screw, so?"

"Tee he, it's alright, Huzzie, I mean, most of my blood was in my dick anyways from staring up your dress and trying to figure out it you were wearing undies or just a piece of string between your shapely bucket seat cheeks! Wait, was that too disgusting for me to say, tee he?"

See, folks? Frank has a way to go yet, right?

[Beep, bloop, truck locks, tap, tap, ahh, purple ground effect lights glowing!]

"Charlie, it was nice to meet you, even though we really didn't speak much tonight, Martin, tee he, I may not have yet wreaked havoc with any of my boyfriend dates, but I don't have a lot of complaints either, tee he, loser, ah, Frank, that was totally disgusting, but I'm wearing a maroon string thong because my push button gear shifter allows me to do that and you can post any of those sneaky and creepy photos that you took as long as my face is not in any of them and Jason, text me soon and thanks for the lighting package, ta, ta, guys."

[Walk clump, walk clump, walk clump, sashay, sashay, walk clump]

So, maybe I should have said to Martin that I haven't let a boyfriend date wreak havoc on me yet, I suppose, since I haven't gone that far yet. I mean, I have thought about it and even dreamed recently about it and it was super smooth and easy in my dream, but I haven't done that yet. And I'm not trying to convince that I'm just a tease. I've treated my boyfriend dates well a few times and I'm not even counting or including the experimentation phase, otherwise known as video game day.

Oh, and as far as the mental side effects of committing to a treatment program, um, somehow, all of my successful boyfriend dates must occur on the night of a full moon, they must contribute to which type of costume I should wear on our date because I'm big on costumes and there must be an extra-large size of salty fries readily available in your vehicle for me to munch on and a beverage for me to sip on.

And the one who figures out that when the full moon is in the eastern sky, which can be easily viewed from my bedroom window and shows up to pick me up with a large order of fries and a beverage in his hands and suggests that we stay in that night and compliments me on the costume that I'm sprouting, well, that guy is going to get it however he wants it. That's my plan anyways.

Also, if you're that guy and you're happy with just a blow job, you don't need to spike my beverage.

[Walk clump, walk clump, walk clump, sashay, sashay, walk clump, down the Strip]

"Oh, wait, what the hell, Lisa? You and your crew are glam tonight?"

"Hush, Huzzie. And let's change the subject."

"Oh, I'll hush just as soon as I hear all about this then! And start with where your clumpy boots are!"

"Fine, me and my girls tried to make a little extra bank and we presented ourselves to Peacock Penny as the three petite Lil Lipstick Lesbians promo petites, but she said we needed to glam it up and that our boots made us a little too tall to qualify as petite, so, we dumped the boots for flats tonight, got our glam on, and, er, the end, so?"

"Ah-hah! You let it slip that you three have your sleep overs on Thursdays in your college jammies and with your PJ tops unbuttoned and then, ah-hah, you let it slip that you three use feather pillows for your playful lipstick pillow fights, didn't you? Ah-hah!"

"Well, we told her that we date boys in our jeans on Saturday's, so? Also, have you seen Peacock Penny tonight? We haven't heard her squawking all about, so?"

"Lisa, the word is that Peacock Penny and her 43 petite promo girls wore themselves out last Sunday while exhibiting a promo for the National Bare Foot Speed Walking marathon, so, they are on bed rest with cartoon flappy feet for another few days. Well, not the Lil Down Under Aussie petites, but the rest of them are down for the count."

"Well, take a selfie for us while we look this way and send it out then, okay? We're banking on the extra bank, Huzzie."

Tis, tis, tis, such a rookie mistake to mention feather pillows to Peacock Penny, right? Tis, tis, tis! I took a few photos, of course and sent them out via group text because tee he, I mean, what could be the harm with that, right?

[Ring, ring, ring]

"Hello?"

"It's Peacock Penny and you need to slap yourself in the face right now and squawk, squawk, squawk, squawk and choke on little pieces of floating feathers and squawk, squawk, squawk, squawk and just as soon as I stop wobbling like a duck instead of my graceful peacock shake, I swear, I'm going to hunt you down and squawk, squawk, squawk, squawk, squawk and how dare you stroll up and down the Strip in your roaring 20's frilly Pocahontas dress and squawk, squawk, squawk, squawk and you had better have a safe room in your house to hide the big bag of money and have a valid sea faring passport and squawk, squawk, squawk and now I have to bring three almost petite Lil Lipstick Lesbians on board and good bye, Huzzie! And slap yourself in the face on my behalf!"

[Click]

Well, see, what could be the harm, right, tee he?"

[Walk clump, walk clump, walk clump, sashay, sashay, walk clump, down the Strip]

Oh, [cough, spit pieces of peacock feathers, cough].

[Beep, beep]

"Keep driving, Martin."

"Aww, come on, Huzzie, you put me in a difficult position in front of the guys back there, so?"

"And what position do you now want to put me in, Martin, hmm?"

"Aww, come on, Huzzie, you asked for a Frozen Swirl Freeze and my passenger door is unlocked, so?"

"See you later, Martin."

[Honk, honk]

Well, I don't have enough experience to understand the second chance thing, so.

[Walk clump, walk clump, walk clump, sashay, sashay, walk clump, down the Strip]

"James, James, James, do you like my costume dress tonight, James, hmm?"

"Aww, Huzzie, all of your costumes are top shelf, so, who is the dweeb beeping his horn at you then, Huzzie, huh?"

[Honk, honk]

"Oh, just some loser dweeb who is beeping his horn at me because he doesn't want to beep his own horn tonight, so, James, I'm in a roaring 20's frilly dress mood to lip lock forward, so?"

[Beep, beep]

"Oh, well, I'm liking your costume nights more and more then, however..."

"[Mwah] oh, in the cover of the darkness of the alley access walkway for sure, James! I may not know everything, but I know how to protect my date."

[Beep, beep, beep]

[Spin, twirl, swinging fringes]

"Keep talking, Huzzie."

"Three forward lip locks up here [peck] and one super tight lip lock down here, James [grope, squeeze, rub, squeeze], so?"

[Looks up, er, the night just before the full moon is pretty close]

"[Lips quiver] how tight of a lip lock then, Huzzie, huh?"

"[Grope, rub, rub] no leakage, no spillage, no after mess, James, so?"

Well, when you've done that a few times, like five times, you get to know what you're doing and what to expect, so.

[Beep, honk!]

"Ooh, oh, I like the way you think, Huzzie, I mean, no after mess, is that what you just said, huh?"

"That's what I said, James, a direct deposit of all of your main blasts and tee he, then all that oozes out a moment later, tee he."

[Honk, beep!]

[Double checks 99% full moon and glances at James' crew guy]

"Um, Chester, I mean, I don't mean to leave you out or cut you out, but if you'll be a love [flips key fob to Chester] and go fetch my truck from in the front of the dweeb crews spot, I mean, name a costume then for next Friday night and I'll not only wear it, I'll hang out with you a little bit, so?"

"[Catches key fob in midair] a bounty hunter, a rain forest bounty hunter! And with a scar on your forearm! Ooh, a rain forest bounty hunter with a scar on your forearm and a ripped t-shirt bloody bandage wrap! Ooh, ooh, a rain forest bounty hunter with a scar on your forearm and a ripped t-shirt bloody bandage wrap and with a red bandana headband with six chunks of hair sticking out like Penny Peacock style!

[Beep, beep, honk, honk, honk]

"Ooh, ooh, ooh, a rain forest bounty hunter with a scar on your forearm and a ripped t-shirt bloody bandage wrap and with a red bandana headband with six chunks of hair sticking out like Penny Peacock style and you just escaped captivity and they hid some of your clothes, but not the whip ass thick vest!"

[BEEP!]

"Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, a rain forest bounty hunter with a scar on your forearm and a ripped t-shirt bloody bandage wrap and with a red bandana headband with six chunks of hair sticking out like Penny Peacock style and you just escaped captivity and they hid some of your clothes, but not the whip ass thick vest, but you are hell bent on your revenge!"

[Two people quietly slip into the darkness of the alley access walkway while Chester is babbling on and on and on]

"Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, a rain forest bounty hunter with a scar on your forearm and a ripped t-shirt bloody bandage wrap and with a red bandana headband with six chunks of hair sticking out like Penny Peacock style and you just escaped captivity and they hid some of your clothes, but not the whip ass thick vest, but you are hell bent on your revenge and the only shorts that you have to wear are your, um, whatever you call those small, yet shiny black shorts that you wear sometimes under your regular shorts! That's my answer! Um, hello? Huzzie? Jim? Hello?"

[Chester whistles as he walks up the Strip while flipping and catching the key fob]

"Ooh, ooh, and a white eye patch and a big red "X" on the left eye and..."

[And Chester is still babbling on and on and on about some rain forest bounty hunter costume]

"[Mwah, smooch, mwah, smack, peck, peck, smack] lift my dress up over my hips, James. It makes it easier to squat down in a dress of this shape and squatting down in front of this [grope, rub, unzip, fish out, ready, set, squeeze] is what I promised, so."

"[Lifts dress up and huh, look at that body then] and why haven't we gotten together, whoa, OMG, whoa, OMG, oh boy! Okay, here we..."

[Go! Oomph, slush, oomph, gasp, suck, suck, oomph, slurp, suck, oomph, gasp, gag, ooh, gag, ooh]

"Oh, Huzzie, Huzzie, that's skill, Huzzie!"

[Sloppy, slurp, oomph, gush, zhush, oomph, suck, suck, suck, slobber, oomph, slurp, gush, oomph]

"Damn, I'm losing it, Huzzie and your dweeb fan has his eyes on you! Prop up, Huzzie! Aha, aha, aha, straighten up your knees and ooh, ooh, be quick about it, Huzzie!"

Well, I mean, well, that was a first! And difficult! But I did it! Well, it was my first time, so I did it that way, but I did it and since James hiked my costume dress up, er, there I was, giving Martin something to jack off over.

[Dweeb Martin off to the side, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap, fap]

And I barely made it up where my back was flat before the natural power of things pushed me right back down to my sturdy squatting position! The natural power of things being James' release, of course.

[Blast! Squirt! Blast, spew, spew, gulp, spew, gulp, stream, gulp, gulp, squirt, gulp, gag, ooze, ahh]

"Champ! Like a champ! Ooh, Huzzie, we need to, ooh, oh, OMG!"

[Milks the stem, milks the stem, loves that ooze and drizzle, milks the stem, swallow, ahh]

Well, I already said that I knew what a guy likes, so.

"[Wheeze] I'm at a loss for words, Huzzie [wheeze]."

"[Wheeze] where is the dweeb?"

"[Wheeze] passed out! Tee he, in his own mess, tee he! Also, Huzzie, did you buy this body?"

"[Wheeze] wholesale, LOL, um, a program and the gym, James. So [wheeze], I need to check on my truck, so?"

"[Wheeze] Yeah, okay, but I'm tapping this the other way some night, right, Huzzie?"

"[Wheeze] ask me in two weeks when I hope to be over my fear of that [wheeze]."

[Two pretty happy people emerge from the darkness of the alley access walkway]

"And, and, and, the rain forest bounty hunter has one black boot, fully tied up and one brown boot that doesn't even have a boot lace and has about six pieces of hard sucky candy in her back pocket! Ooh, and in her side ammo pack is a partially smoked cigar, two wet stick matches, a broken multi-tool and a 9-volt battery! That's my new answer! Oh, there you two are, so, tee he, so, next Friday night then, right, Huzzie?"