I, Candi Ch. 31: Say Uncle

Before Walter can respond he swiftly removes his hand from Cordelia's knee. Kody then stood up and stepped over to shake Joe's hand.

"Well hello, Daddy in Law. Still as handsome as ever."

Joe frowns uncertain what to say. How much did Joe know? He shakes her hand back but merely smiles with a nod.

Candi quickly returned to the living room to save the day.

"Lighten up, Joe. Walter knows everything. Well, at least about my night at Pony'S. Kody here has filled me in on some secrets. Everything is fine. I still love your Baby Boy."

She then twists on her heel toward Walter, "And, yes Uncle Walter, Damian has informed Joe what our lifestyle is like. So, we can all speak freely without discomfort."

Joe hisses shaking his head, "Boy, we're one messed up family."

Kody puckers withholding her own review of that comment to herself, deciding to pull Joe by the arm to take a seat to her right. Now she sat between Joe and Walter, knee to knee to knee.

Candi giggles, "Look at you, claiming all of my kin."

The brunette wiggles her chest slightly, "What can I say? I like being stuck in the middle."

Joe leans forward resting his elbows on his knees, "Too change the subject. We have one week before Damian comes home. Any thoughts on throwing him a party?"

As Candi starts to speak she hears the shrill sound of a horn outside on the street. With a squint out the front door she spots yet another visitor. A huge smile crossed her face as she holds a finger up toward Joe before stepping to the door.

They hear the southern drawl of woman over the clatter of boots on the porch.

"Mornin' Critter! When are you going to give me my dress back?"

Laughter ensues between them as Kody attempts to maintain the Men's attention.

"I've been meaning to stop by the bar and bring it too you. Busy week with my Parlor's grand opening. I'm heading to my Dad's tonight for the weekend."

Candi motions the vibrant redhead to enter the house and join the gathering. Tina helped herself inside and followed Candi in to reveal the room full.

She squints her eyes at the darkness of the room, "Well, hey there. Hope I'm not intruding. What's going down in this here fishing hole? There's Handsome Joe!"

Joe stands up and reaches his hand out. Tina tilts her cowboy hat up then claims his hand only to place it on her left breast.

"Home is where the heart is they say. Good to see you, Handsome."

Joe blushes and shakes his head, "What's this about a dress?"

Candi giggles, "She loaned it to me. She saved me from being caught streaking in the Fitness Center parking lot."

"Was a chilly ride home." Tina winks at Joe.

"Nuff said! Feels like it was a chilly ride here. Mind if I have my hand back?" Joe tries not to chuckle.

"Just call me the Lonely Ranger. Two silver bullets and no gun to shoot em' with." Tina eyes Joe's crotch in hopes he might acknowledge her humor.

Candi interrupts, "Boy, did you wake up on the wrong side of the beer keg. Calm down, Cantina. No seriously, don't. I love seeing Joe squirm." She runs over to hug the woman.

Tina holds her tightly, "All else fails we have each other."

Breaking away Candi drags Tina over to sit her on the couch. She then darts up the staircase.

"That Critter has more energy than a race horse at a glue factory." Tina snickers watching her swiftly return from her bedroom. Bolting down the stairs both Joe and Walter can't help but notice Candi's 38D's beating her robe to death.

"Here's your dress. Washed and fresh as daisies."

Tina claims her outfit, "Daisies? All I need now are the Dukes to go with it."

Candi drops into the sofa next to Tina and snuggles up claiming her arm as a security blanket.

"We were just discussing Damian's return home." Joe interrupted their friskiness.

Tina pepped up looking Joe in the eye, "Part of the reason I'm here. My bar is open to throw him a bash. My stepson, Stevie finally called me back. Memory lane there." She hackles, "I told him about Demon's coming home and he's gonna close the tattoo parlor for a week. Him and his biker buddies are riding up here to party hearty. So, we got us some planning to do, Critter and Demon Daddy."

Joe chuckles, "Sounds good. Keep in mind though, he's only home a few weeks. I want some fishing time with my boy."

Candi giggles, "I want fishing time with him too. I miss his pole."

Everyone shares a moment of joy.

Walter could at least tell that his niece had taken her mind off of the situation this weekend. She needed this distraction. He was thankful that she had close friends.

Candi regains her composure, "Oh! My manners. Tina? This is my Uncle Walter and my friend...sister...Cordelia aka Kody with a K."

Tina uses her fingers like a gun shooting at them, "Howdy Family. I'm her new Auntie!"

Walter chuckles, "I didn't know I remarried."

Tina smirks, "No ring on this here trigger finger. Learned my lesson dodging bullets and dancing with rattlers. Solo roping from here on out. Just call me Lariat Harriet."

Snorting loudly Kody chokes up, "Oh my God! I love your wit. You would fit right in at Pony'S."

Tina raises an eyebrow, "EXpress? That joint still open? You dance there?"

Kody nods, "For years now. Started there barely legal. I love it."

Tina shy's away looking at Candi, "Maybe I should turn CanTina's into a strip club. What do you think Critter?"

Candi's expression is frozen, "In this town? They might run us all out."

Tina frowns, "I was joking. I like my establishment. Lil fun now and then is all dandy. Too much and I might lose my seat at the Beauty Parlor."

For the next forty five minutes the room is aflutter with laughter and rebellion. Nearing noon another knock at the door forced Candace to jump up to answer it. This time however the face at the door was one she had only seen on occasion.

A middle aged Mail Delivery driver from UPS spotted her and held up a large package.

"I don't recall ordering anything recently. What's this?"

The Mail Man shook his head, "Sorry about this. This package belongs to your neighbor. There's no answer. Third time I tried to deliver it this week. No name just an address. Could I leave this here with you to pass off when you see them?"

Candi opens the door and claims the package peering at the address, "Which neighbor? Oh, that's Gunner's house behind mine. Sure, I'll walk it over later before I leave town."

Thanking her the Mail Man sprinted away back to his truck.

Returning to the living room with the package she rests it on the floor by the staircase. Fidgeting she wondered what it could be. It was weighty and had shuffled about slightly. Maybe Gunner had bought Hush a gift for his rash behavior of late.

Shaking off her curiosity she turned to face Tina whom had stood up.

"I better get. Gotta bar to get open. Thanks for daisyin' up my attire. Drop by or call me this week to plan the party. Demon Daddy has my number too." She leans in to whisper, "Tell him he needs to warm my chilly bones."

Candi giggles, "I'll do my best."

Waving back at the others Tina takes her leave.

Not far behind Joe stood up and crept in behind to steal a hug.

"Have fun at Phil's. You need a ride home give me a call."

"Thanks Joe. Daddy Number two."

He warmly smiles and looks to the sofa, "Good seeing you again, Walter. You too Hotstuff."

Kody blows him a kiss as Walter leaps up for a final hand shake.

Watching Joe leave Candi drifts into daydreaming. It takes Kody whom had gotten up to stretch to snap her out of it.

"I better go too. My sitter will want to give my son back by now. I'm sure she's needing hair extensions by now."

"Thanks for driving down, Cordelia. I love you."

Walter grumbles, "I love you too."

Kody sighs, "You just want to smell my roses."

"Valentine's Day every day, Beautiful."

"Hell of a note. Had to buy my own flowers." She pats his chin with her fingertips, "Stop by Pony'S next weekend. Bring your credit cards."

Walter walks Kody outside to the front porch. Once she takes her leave Walter returns to his niece's side.

"Let me get a shower and gather my things. We can head out as soon as possible. Make yourself at home. Eat some of Joe's fruit or it will go bad fast." She starts up the stairs knowing that he's watching her. Mid way up she removes her robe to stand there nude.

Without looking at him she utters, "I'll leave my doors open and you can watch me shower through the fogged up shower window."

Walter raises an eye brow, "Really?"

She says nothing and heads on upstairs.

Walter liked his new niece. He would definitely take a peek.

An hour later, both of them sat in Walter's car on the street.

"Ready?"

"Drive Walter. Let's get this over with."

He couldn't take his eyes off of her skirt.

All legs Baby!