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Click here"It means everyone around me must die," she said.
She yanked the knife out and raised it again for another stab. Blood and a string of flesh dripped off it.
"I told you you didn't want to be with me tonight," she said.
Her arm brought the knife down again.
"I told you..."
And again.
"But you wouldn't listen..."
And again.
"You wouldn't listen..."
And again...
Great story I could definitely see this as a full fledged movie.
Thankgod halloween isn't for months; the chills I have now are bad enough. I enjoyed the thrill of this so much, I read it out to my Fiance. Whom, enjoyed it also. Thumbs up, on a wonderful piece. More's the pity I wasn't back on Lit enough to vote on this in 2007.
A totally creepy story. I loved how you showed how much in love the two characters were and then the twist ending just ruins it all. So good.
And I *really* didn't anticipate the ending. I guessed she was daddy's little girl, but had no idea she'd murder her beloved (curses! I should have seen it a long way off). Good quality writing, will read more of your work.
God couldn't think of anything original. Saw this on Fright Night 3 years ago on TV.
OMG!!! Was so not expecting that - you should write for the movies - so much better than the shit they dish out for horror - and the sex scenes were hot too!!!
A great story for Halloween. Good luck in the contest.
That was chilling. Really good writing. Never once did I feel 'out' of the story, looking in. I've been reading the contest entries, and this is the best of the lot yet. Well done.