I was a Sasquatch Pt. 03

If you don't mind my asking what a rare custom job is like that worth?

Probably 3 or 4 times what I paid for it, it came with a caravan too, that we have to pick up in Frankfurt.

So, now you are planning on riding it to where exactly?

From here to Germany, Maybe Austria, Italy, France, Spain, maybe Gibraltar, Portugal, back up to Belgium, then through the Chunnel over to Great Britain, possibly up to Ireland and Scotland. Then probably book passage on a cargo ship along with it to some port in the States. During our trip we are thinking about using the tour to raise money for less fortunate people. Those who may still be suffering job losses as result of the stupid pandemic a few years ago. A lot of people got poorer while some governments got richer during the world lock down. Think of this run as the lady Godiva ride of modern day.

Do you have an organizer to coordinate with the local towns and cities? For publicity.

Hopefully when Franz and Helga show up later, they will have some news of at least one man who might help put this thing together.

He must be thinking about Engelbert. Yes, he will be a good start at least from Dusseldorf down as far as Nuremberg I know some people in Italy, France,and Spain. Harvey, do you know anyone in southern Germany who would be willing to step up.

I'll make a couple of calls and let you know in a few minutes.

That leaves Portugal, and the Island countries we can forget about riding over to Gibraltar as a large group, they only allow so many to cross the runway at a time. My wife will handle Belgium for us.

Hey guys it's time to get this party Started. I talked to the Hotel manager, and we now have permission to hold a private party in the only meeting room this small hotel has. It might get a little crowded though because it only has a seating capacity of 75.

You walked up to the manager like that?

You don't see me wearing anything, do you Brad? I figured if Heather is ballsy enough to do the things, she has been doing like riding naked on a 200,000 Euro bike down the highway on 1 wheel, there was no way I was going to pussy out when faced with a stiff dick hotel manager. I mean stiff necked, but I'm fairly sure his dick is stiff after seeing us invade his office.

If there is one thing that is common with all bikers, the world over is they all know how to party. Before the night was over there were at least 4 more naked beer runs. Zandvoort had met its match that night.

****

Honey, did you double check to see if we left anything in our room?

John, I checked, double checked, and checked once again just to be sure. There is nothing left in there but a dozen empty cases of beer bottles.

Are you really going to wear only what you have on?

Yep, just my boots and helmet. Until we stop for breakfast up the road, then I'll slip on my leathers when we park. Oh, I'm driving by the way. I love the feeling of all that power throbbing between my legs almost as much as sex.

Hahaha just don't act too crazy and get us pulled over for reckless endangerment.

Like the Dutch Police would even try to pull us over when they see a naked woman riding out a mile long wheelie on a 1200-pound motorcycle. Anyway, I have no intention of showing off, I just want to drive until we stop for breakfast. Oh, just in case, put these in your shirt pocket. If we meet a Police cruiser and they turn around and follow us, I'll raise up a little and you can slip my bikini under my bottom it has snaps on both sides. You can slip my top around me and fasten it. Then your long arms can reach around me and take the bars it will look like you are driving.

Not long after heather and John hit the road that is exactly what happened. By the time the Policeman got his car stopped turned around and began following them John had managed to get Heather's bikini and top on her. They pulled over as soon as heather saw the red lights switched on. The officer approached and told John to switch off the bike. The rider in back said the officer not in front.

Heather jumped off the bike but when she did the snaps on her bikini wasn't fastened properly. Her bikini fell off leaving her standing there exposing her womanhood to the officer. His eyes bulged out then he licked his lips.

Unbelievably beautiful, madam. Was the only thing the shocked officer could think of to say.

Yes, she is, officer, is there a reason you stopped us?

Uh. my English is not great, but the rider belongs behind the driver.

Yes, we know I was teaching her how to control the bike.

Oh, OK be careful.

Heather sat back on the bike in front of John again not bothering to reach down and pick up her bikini bottom.

The officer bent down, picked up the garment and started to hand it to heather.

You forgot this madam.

You can keep it and here you can have my top, give it to your wife.

Handing the top over she was once again naked except for her boots and helmet. The Officer stood there holding the garments in his hand in complete shock at the sight of a completely naked woman sitting on the motorcycle. John started the engine and drove off before the Officer could recover.

You realize that you no longer have a backup plan if we get pulled over again.

Yes, I do but I'm not going to tell you what it is just now. I only hope that if it is a woman Officer, she likes women and is as easily shocked as he was. Now let me have the bars back you can hold on to my boobs if you want.

John's long legs were enough to hide Heather's nakedness from the side. The flaring hid her from the front, and from behind you couldn't even see her in front of John's huge bulk. They rode like this for about another hour before Heather spied a large group of Bikers riding in front of them.

That should be Franz and Brad and the rest of their club. She told John through their headsets made into the helmets they were wearing.

Hold on to something.

John barely had time to grab hold of her breasts as they approached the club from behind. Heather goosed the throttle bringing the front wheel off the ground then proceeded to ride past the strung-out group of bikers. Steering the bike on its back tire by leaning to the left or to the right changing lanes several times, she kept the front tire off the ground until she was well past the mile long string of bikers. About ten minutes later she pulled off the highway to stop at a café where she had previously logged into the GPS screen on the dash of the motorcycle.

I thought we agreed that you wouldn't drive too crazy.

We did, and I didn't, you should see me do a U turn at 15 miles per hour on the rear wheel of my vintage Bultaco 360.

Babe there is a world of difference between a 200-pound motorcycle and one that weighs 1200 pounds.

Says you, not Me.

Heather you are the craziest bitch I've ever met. How can you handle a motorcycle as big as that when you are as small as you are?

Thank You Franz. This bike is so easy to control if John will let me, once we get home, I would like to strip all of the extra stuff off it and see how well it would do on the Pike's Peak climb.

Uh, that will not only be no, but hell no there's no fucking way.

Hahaha.

I wouldn't be so sure John, she seems determined.

OK, Franz, I found the café you mentioned last night. What is so special about it?

It belongs to a lady friend of my wife; our club often stops here on our way back from a run. Sometimes after too many beers a few of us get a bit carried away with our regular truth or dare games, if you know what I mean.

I got it, do any of you ladies have the ovaries to follow me?

Heather didn't wait for a response from the women bikers, It was late enough after the early morning breakfast run and still a couple hours before the regulars for lunch would be arriving, Heather noted there were only commercial vehicles in the parking lot so these were probably truckers and local delivery persons catching a bite to eat on their breaks, figuring the likelihood of any of the customers having any under-aged children with them was a mute possibility. With that assumption she brazenly walked into the café.

Can I help you miss? Oh my God you don't have any clothes on.

Very astute of you to notice. I would like to reserve your back room if you have one for a party of 120, we will have your breakfast buffet.

B, b, b -but we don't have a back room.

That's fine, we'll just rearrange a few of your tables.

But miss. What about your clothes? The server asked, then she looked up and saw dozen of naked or nearly naked women entering with their biker men. Some of whom had also stripped off most of their clothing.

Got damn I've been eating here for the past 20 years; this almost makes my delivery run out here worth the trip. The guys at the terminal will never believe me.

Then take a picture and you will have all the proof you need sir.

The trucker stared up at the naked giant of a man standing just a few inches away.

No fucking way Mister. I know how rough you bikers can get when you're crossed.

Suit yourself, Waitress put everyone's bill on my ticket and make sure these fine truckers receive anything they ask for, my treat.

Turning back to face the truckers sitting at their table. Now about those pictures, it was not a mere suggestion. I insist.

Another trucker asked. Sir, why are you naked?

I could tell you it is because I am big enough to do as I damn well please, or that I am doing it because of a dare. Both might sound plausible to you. Neither would be completely true or false though. I guess my standing here naked started with a promise.

What sort of a promise Sir.

Please call me John.

John it is then, my name is Fritz Heinrich. What sort of promise?

I was just a simple gold miner, who spent my days deep down in a mine shaft. The only time I new the sun was shining was on my rare days off. The sun didn't do me any good though because my body was completely covered with fur like hair. Many called me a Sasquatch, mainly because I genuinely looked like one. After a poker game one night I became the owner of that mine. That little blond over there had been serving our drinks at the casino all night. She had many questions for me about my hairiness, things like does it itch, how much time do I have to spend taking showers, Did I ever consider shaving it all off? Just joking around with me most of the night while I played poker. I told her I had given up on the idea, then was when she told me she knew how to make it go away and never come back and was 99 percent sure she could help me. I asked her to go home with me. Then I made her a promise that if she could make my hair go away and stay gone for 6 months that I would take her on a vacation to Spain where we could lay out on a nude beach for as long as she wanted. I would also get a chance to get a tan. Once we arrived in Amsterdam our plans started to change somewhat.

How so?

We decided to rent a pair of scooters to ride around and see Amsterdam on. Can you visualize this 7ft 4inch tall 400-pound guy on a scooter?

Not really no, I guess that would be a little too much for one of those things.

The man at the rental place agrees with you. But he had a big Harley Davidson he could rent to me, but I got the impression that he would rather sell it. So, we bought it then altered our plans. We still plan to spend some time at a beach or 2 in Spain but are going to take the long way to get there.

But that doesn't explain why your Johnston is wagging in front of me. Where are your balls anyway? Did something happen and you had to have them removed?

Nope I still have them they are just up in my groin. Let me tell you they are proportionately as large as the rest of me. Heather did something to me, then they ascended. We learned how to keep the up there if we want. I find it more comfortable with where they are because I'm not always accidentally sitting on them.

Ouch, that would have to be painful. OK why ride around naked.

We started thinking of ways to be able to ride all the way to Spain in the nude and not be harassed. Then the idea of safety in numbers came up. We started finding like minded riders. To add some underlying legitimacy to the idea of a group of bikers traveling naked, the idea to turn it into a naked bike run to raise money to help people still suffering from, among other things, the stupid global pandemic a few years ago, was born.

How are you going to go about collecting this money? Walk up to people and ask them to hand over Euros to a bunch of naked bikers?

Hahaha, I doubt that would be very productive. No, we have set up several web sites to explain what we are doing, our goals and the reasons for doing this. People can donate online. They can sponsor the run through the town of their choice along or near our proposed route. If a village town or city pledges to help support the victims of the pandemic, or wounded warriors and their families or persons who are in need of some assistance no matter their reasons we will be glad to ride through their town on a route they lay out for us. One in our group owns a newspaper so she will be running a daily editorial of the event.

In other words, you are not doing this just to show your ass. You are trying to turn your wife's desire to be naked into some form of a worthy cause.

I seeded the event with a significant amount to show proof that it is not a fraudulent scheme.

Do you know what? I think I will take some pictures and post them on those web site's you mentioned. My younger brother was part of the coalition in Iraq and one of his friends lost part of his leg over there somewhere so you can count on me making a donation as well.

Two carloads of people pulled off the highway to the parking lot entrance. There were the usual few trucks in the truck parking area, once they drove past the tractor trailer rigs, they could see row after row of motorcycles. Not the kind of motorcycles you might find associated with biker gangs though. These were the big touring machines usually only ridden by business people with substantial incomes. Thinking nothing of seeing so many motorcycles They located a place to park. Then started walking towards the café when they saw it. Parked not 20 feet from the door of the café was the largest motorcycle any of them had ever seen. A huge blue and gold luxury touring cruiser

Someone in there has money said the man driving the Bugatti to the man who was driving the Porsche 959.

They sure do I bet that bike cost more than your Bugatti.

There must be close to 60 motorcycles here I wonder what the occasion is.

Probably just a tour group. I hope there is a vacant table though because I'm hungry and this café serves the best American style breakfast in the Netherlands. Mrs. Fulcher even serves grits.

Grits?

Yep, I spent 3 months in Biloxi Mississippi where I learned to love having a bowl grits with my eggs biscuits and sausage gravy. Let's go in and try to find a table.

One of the men's wife said I'm hungry enough to sit on one of their laps just to have a place to eat.

Hahaha, and my luck you will just happen to sit on some 6-foot-tall biker with his wand sticking straight up your ass.

Don't be rude Jim. I should be so lucky besides, why would a man be eating breakfast with his wand hanging out.

Little did she know but as soon as they opened the door they would be in for the shock of their lives. because right then John was returning from the restroom and walked right past the 2 couples.

Oh my god Jim, that guy has to be over 7 feet tall, and did you see his wand? I swear I must have died and gone to heaven.

I'm 7 feet 4 actually, please folks don't think anything bad about our state of undress we are on a naked motorcycle run to raise money for person in need of financial assistance.

Sir? Are you the owner of the blue and gold machine parked out there?

My wife and I own it, why do you ask?

I bet my friend that it probably cost more than his Bugatti.

You may be correct, I bought it second hand. Please, why don't you folks come join us? We can always make room for more even if some of you have to sit on another's lap.

I wouldn't mind sitting on your lap. Jim's wife exclaimed.

Hahaha, Sorry that spot is reserved for my Heather. If I allowed you to do that, she might ride off without me.

Two other waitresses showed up early to help prepare for the noon rush, but stopped dead in their tracks when they entered the front door. Irine the waitress how greeted the bikers when they arrived was running her legs off trying to keep the coffee cups filled, The day manager had come from her office when she heard the commotion going on, knowing it would do no good to say anything she grabbed an apron and headed to the cooking area to lend a hand to the cooks, in an effort toe keep the steam table of the buffet filled with food.

Last call for the breakfast buffet, fill your plates now or go hungry. We have to empty the steam table to make it ready for our lunch run.

Once everyone had eaten their fill John walked up to the register to settle the bill. Being an American and used to adding a hefty gratuity, he looked at the total then added up 30 percent to that in his head. Handed the cashier his credit card. Seeing the total, he had written it she said Sir you've entered too much.

Not the way I see it, son. Divide the extra evenly among all employees if the sum does not equal more than 300 Euro tell me.

But Sir we are not allowed to accept tips.

Then call your manager over.

Is there a problem here, the manager asked.

Mrs. Fulcher the gentlemen wants me to give everyone 300 Euro. As a gratuity.

And I suppose you are big enough to argue with him?

Uh, no ma-am.

Then do as the nice gentleman ordered remember the customer is always right even if they are wrong.

Y' yes ma-am.

*****

Where to heather?

Next stop is a petrol station then on to Eindhoven. I want to visit the evolution museum. We need to stop somewhere before we get there so I can put on some clothes though.

Are you seriously planning on riding in the nude the whole way? asked one of the other ladies.

Unless it is freezing cold, I am going to ride naked all the way to Velencia.

Lady you've got balls bigger than your husband's, no way I would be ballsy enough to ride in the back saddle on beast as large as you guy's motorcycle while someone one wheeled it for kilometer after kilometer.

That's why he keeps his balls pushed up into his groin He is afraid of letting anyone see just how big my balls really are. Get on john we have some highway to burn.

John was reaching to open the saddle bags to get his leathers when Heather fired up the hog.

Fuck it he said hopping on the back, I'll have to get dressed later.

Heather cracked the throttle let out on the clutch then drug the trailer hitch all the way out of the parking lot. Some of the other bikers had partially gotten dressed most of the women hadn't had time to put on more than their panties, but most had not bothered. They thought if that crazy little American woman could get away with it, why not join her.

Out of curiosity when another motorcyclist saw the group pass by, they would join in with the group. There would be close to 100 bikes running together before they reached Eindhoven. That is when they reach Eindhoven as many would soon lean when Heather pulled into a large petrol station. Once Heather parked at the pump she waited until everyone had shut off their engines. Then hopped up and stood on the saddle. Waving her hands and shouting for attention.

Listen up everyone, I need the rest of you to lose your clothing. While we rode, I received a request on the display screen on our bike. Trom the township of Zaltbommel Asking if we would pass through there and ride a selected route they are setting up as I speak. Our web site has already collected 100,000 Euros. Picture's and videos are already being posted and streamed from our breakfast. This will be our first official naked motorcycle run parade. The police posted a text stating they would guide us through the route at 10 KMH, but I voice texted back stating that motorcycles can be unstable at that slow of a speed. Mine and John's are not stable below 15KMH if we have to make any maneuvering, so I requested a 20 KMH minimum and they agreed. So, take them leathers and undies off. For those who have recently joined us, you are welcome to ride with us. As long as you follow my rules. Be respectful of others and ride naked when I tell you to. Otherwise, you may follow but at a distance from the pack Understood.