All Comments on 'Ice Queen Ch. 01'

You know a really good story when you're disappointed it ends. More please and longer.

An excellent story and I can't wait for more. Please continue.

Good start to the story...please continue

Can't wait to read the next chapter.

Let's see where this goes. My favorite kind of story. 3-4 pages would be good.

Unless I miss my mark the MH-53 Pave Low III is a USAF bird. Or was until it was replaced with the CV-22 I Osprey. Damned good start!!!

3 stars

DragonRider55 Tsgt USAF Retired

USAF put them in service in 2009

Anonymous

01/06/20

Trivia

Unless I miss my mark the MH-53 Pave Low III is a USAF bird. Or was until it was replaced with the CV-22 I Osprey.

I noticed a few grammar and spelling errors that threw me off, and a few paragraphs of what you wrote didn't make a lot of sense. If you need an editor, I'd be glad to volunteer.

That being said, it's a good story and still gets 5 stars from me, can't wait to read the other chapters.

I think the only author on Lit that writes better Military scenes (that I have read) is ScreamingEagle101

https://literotica.com/beta/s/champions-vol-01

I admire your courage writing in a modern military setting. The critics in this genre are assholes and are ready to pounce at everything you get wrong. I say Fuck them and just write a good story and thanks for your time. Keep writing please.

Great First story, it just captured me right from the start.

Love this one, coming back for a second time!