All Comments on 'IDENTICAL TWIN SISTERS AMIE AND ANN'

Please, don't take this personally, but could you not write anymore. This was laboured to say the least, sorry not even one star.

good concept but the constant naming instead of using pronouns, and the poor structure was a terrible. if you write more please have someone proofread and edit

There is something very off in the telling of your story. I dislike when a story starts with "I am so and so." I like to learn identities as a story progresses; not robot text. Things like: I had cream, my titties, etc. Something like: When I saw Nicole's body, my pussy started getting wet. It's almost like you came out with a sentence, but didn't know how to speak English. I didn't read much past the twins going to separate rooms to be seduced. You don't seem to have the experience to aptly describe how a sex scene should go. I'm sorry to be so negative, but you need more experience.

RS

Just don't listen to anything that anybody said. Just look at them. They are posting their dribble as anonymous. They are too afraid to come out and say who they are. They are probably just out of work literary critics wanting to exercise some power. Maybe even worse, they might not even be that. Just some lowlife scum that it makes them feel powerful to condemn someone else's work.

True that your story might not be that exciting, but don't give up. You will get better as you practice.

Next thing you know will be that clampealer is gonna tell other commenters that they're not allowed to criticize a movie since they haven’t made any themselves

What a twat.

Sorry,

The premise was good but reading it was very painful. I had to stop at the mention of having a "Foursome".

Maybe an editor might help.

I love giving 1 star after throwing up from a couple paragraphs.

Psst…. 1 star is good, right?

Full stops are needed to take a rest and a breath. You do this even if reading silently to yourself. Long sentences cause the reader to speed up to get to the next full stop. Commas are onl pause points so only parially count.

Btw it's rude to write all capitals, it is like shouting.

Are you writing erotica or some sort of technical manual? This was unreadable!