Idolatria Ch. 08

"Why these?" I asked.

He smiled warmly at me. "Your eye color," he said simply.

I felt myself blushing more at his words. On second glance, the leather was definitely close to the color of... But that seemed like such a strange thing for Levi to think of. Somehow too romantic for the context of bondage.

As my hand sank with the weight of my much quieter cuff (no metal jangling) and Levi grabbed a second to repeat with my left wrist, I looked up at him curiously. "Why do you... like this?" I asked.

"Like what?" He kept his focus on my hands, testing the allowance between skin and leather as he adjusted the buckle.

I swallowed. "Tying... me. This... bondage, stuff like that. The whole thing. Why do you like it?"

When Levi looked back up at me, his brow was raised, lips barely parted as if he was surprised I'd even asked. Slowly, his mouth broke into another gentle smile. "Well... If I had to explain my history with domination and submission, we'd be here a while," he laughed. He let his eyes fall back to his task, finished with my cuff, and leaned back to dig into the drawer. "But if I had to talk about it bluntly... I think it comes down to control."

"So you like... controlling me?"

"Not you, per se. Will you wear a collar for me?"

My chest thrummed at his words. He didn't ask if I wanted it. He was asking if I would do it for him. For his pleasure. "I... yes... Yes, Sir."

"Good boy," he purred. "Bow your head."

I obliged, hair dipping into my eyes as Levi brushed his fingers at the back of my neck and, like before, brought the collar up under my throat - presumably one that matched my new cuffs, without a metal ring hanging off of it. A tremor worked down my spine as the leather tightened over my skin. Mark of ownership, I thought. Just for now...

"There is no one who can fully control you, Ash," said Levi softly, lifting my head again. "I can suggest to you what I desire from you. I can order you, command you. I can punish you if you disobey. But any Dom who says they control you is full of shit."

I blinked. When I spoke, I could feel my larynx testing the collar. "Why do you think that?"

Levi's eyes narrowed with his smile. "Because I can only get from you as much as you're willing to give me," he said. "However much control you hand to me is what I'm able to use. If you give me nothing, then I own nothing. You can scream at a submissive all you want, but if they don't want to submit, there's nothing you can do. When you submit to me, you are handing me your body, your spirit, for me to take and use as I desire... And they can be taken back at a single word."

"My safe word."

"Exactly."

"But you could ignore that..."

"You're right. But I wouldn't. That's abuse. Abuse is not domination."

His warm hand was back beneath my chin, stroking my jaw lovingly. I shuddered and leaned into his touch. "That doesn't really explain... the control with bondage," I said slowly.

Levi gave me a sympathetic grin. "You're right. Let's see if we can explore that." He closed the drawer between his ankles and opened the one by mine, forcing me to tuck my leg out of the way. This one jangled a lot more and I could actually see everything inside... Numerous carabiners clipped together, different sizes of loose steel rings, and bundles of colored rope, some that looked like they were made of different materials...

Levi took out a dwindling coil of plain tan, unwrapped it, and swiftly measured out two arm lengths, then paused to consider the length before adding a couple more inches. Satisfied, he returned to the drawer and cut off what he had, then stood up and kicked it closed with his heel. He still had the weird-looking pair of scissors from the drawer in his hand - not like scissors I'd ever seen, though. They were angled with rounded tips and ridged edges, with odd metal bits sticking out of one side. He set them down on the nightstand and set to work on his music player.

"What are those for?" I asked.

"Emergency release," he said simply.

Emergency... I examined the scissors as Levi's music came on, something different than before... Some strange band with a song that was starting out really slow, mismatched tempos setting an uneven pace. "You used those to cut me out last time," I said.

He smiled down at me. "Had them in my pouch. I don't do ropework without them."

Probably for exactly the reason he used them on me, I thought.

"Hands," he said. I held them up so he could gather my wrists together, adjusting them so the D-shaped rings faced inward, then fed the rope through these until the ends were even. Now holding the rope like a long lead, he knelt on the dark, soft covers beneath us and gave the pillow at its head a sharp pat. Long, like a body pillow - did he sleep on it like normal? "Lie back."

There was a moment of trepidation as I looked down at the bed, imagining flashes of what he could do to me here... What he would do to me. I bit my lip and edged myself over, swinging my legs up and - meeting his expectant eyes - I carefully lay down at his side, chest thudding, breath escaping me in a shiver.

Levi smiled and stroked my hair, then rose up, kneeling on the bed at my shoulder. My hands were lying at my middle as he busied himself with the rope. I can do this. I want to do this. I want nothing more than to be with him right now. I kept repeating this in my head as I watched his fingers fidgeting with the bar set into that little hollow at the top of the headboard. It reminded me a bit of the little thing you can tie a strap to on your phone or something. Just like it, Levi was pulling the ends of the rope through it... But if this was to tie me to that bar, this seemed like too much rope.

And then he yanked.

At once, my hands were thrown back with a snap until the cuffs banged against the leather upholstery above my head. Levi was now securing the end of the rope, not to the bar, but to the steel ring on the bedpost to my left. He finished it off with a loop that seemed quick to undo, like half a bow knot... But it was far, far out of my reach. My wrists were now flush against the headboard, useless.

I became aware of my breath picking up, heart hammering against my ribs. Beside me, Levi sighed and sank down onto the covers, one arm up on the headboard, his fingers teasing the backs of my hands. "So now you've handed me control, Ash," he smiled. "And this is what I do with it. This is how my work fits in. Look - just this much, and I already command a third of your body. With the right equipment, the proper skill, I can move you, position you however I like... However it would please me to move you."

There was that thing again. Please me. I swallowed again and felt the collar move with my muscles. Levi's voice was haunting, deep and slow and burrowing down into my chest... As he spoke, his free hand came up over my eyes, the scent of leather lingering on his fingers...

"I can take away your senses," he was saying, his voice drifting lower, closer to me. "I can focus and direct them where I want them. I have ways to keep your mouth open for me to use, ways to stop you from turning your face from me. I can force your legs apart and bind your ankles above your head, and once I've restrained you, I have effortless access to your body... For me to fully use and enjoy what you've offered me. This is the control you give me."

There was a clattering noise over my head. My hands were shaking so hard, the cuffs were rattling against the headboard. Levi's fingers wove between mine as if to still the tremor, the other sliding from my face and toying with the collar of my shirt. His lips gently brushed my burning face. Behind him, the music was faster, intermingling sounds impossible to untangle but all forming this strange melody.

"But you're giving me this because you trust me, Ash," he breathed. "Because you want me to have that control. Do you feel that?"

"Yes," I gasped.

"Because you're rewarded when you serve me."

"Yes, Sir..."

"You've taken to this very well," he smirked. "I think I'm content just seeing you like this for now. I'll be merciful and give you yours."

Give me what...? Before I could ask, Levi pressed his mouth over mine, his slow, gentle kisses dripping heat into my stomach... His hand strayed down my front, eschewing all delicacy as it slid firmly over my heaving chest, the taut muscle of my abdomen, down -

A strangled groan erupted from me against Levi's mouth. My body jolted, shuddered, back arching and cuffs snapping in their bond. And yet all my squirming didn't dislodge Levi's hands from the front of my jeans. He held fast, fingers cradling my groin, my heartbeat thumping against his palm through denim.

"Poor thing," he muttered against my lips. "Are you going to let me take care of you this time?"

My voice was coming out before I could process. "Please... please."

Levi sat up, eyes rapt on his prize. Fingers deftly undid my jeans, pushed my fly open, then brazenly slipped in over my underwear... The sight alone of Levi's hand over my swollen dick was enough to drive me insane, hard-on threatening my waistband, but the way he touched me was...

It was around here that I realized no one had ever touched my dick except me.

And I hadn't realized how it could possibly be different, but it was... Even with how little he was doing, every tiny sensation ignited the muscles in my lower belly, worked tremors through my thighs. My mouth was open, my breath coming deep and harsh, hips weakly rocking to get just that little bit more of him against me...

And then his hand was gone.

My head fell back with a whine, the heat between my legs quickly turning sore. My arms strained against the cuffs. God, I'd never wanted the use of my own hands so much...! "Levi, please... please don't..."

"Don't?" he said playfully. He pushed the edge of my shirt up, grazing the center line of my abdomen with his knuckles. "I already stopped. What 'don't'?"

"Don't stop."

"Ask properly," he hissed.

I squirmed in my restraints. "Please... Sir, please touch... me."

"Aren't I touching you now?"

"My — my c... please!"

"Tell me."

"Please put y-your hand on my cock... please, Sir, I can't —!"

I was rewarded instantly. Levi gripped me through the soft cotton of my boxer briefs and stroked, forcing another groan from me. The muscle behind my cock twitched as the sensation of Levi's fingers squeezing rippled up through my stomach... I felt precum dripping freely onto my belly with every pulse.

"Can you come like this?" he asked.

This felt amazing... The sensation was so much stronger than my own hand, and I couldn't understand how. I could barely breathe, but somehow I managed a shaky response. "I don't... I don't know..."

Levi moved away again.

Taunting absence trembled in my stomach. I heard myself whine, felt my hips rising automatically off the mattress to meet the place where Levi's hand had just been as he shifted to the edge of the bed.

"Easy," he told me. "You can wait a little longer."

"I need... Levi, please -"

"I know. Be patient."

It was difficult. At that moment, I didn't remember wanting anything as badly as I wanted Levi touching me again... I tried to ignore the throb between my legs and watched Levi opening the drawer of his nightstand.

"What do you use to masturbate, Ash?"

The question threw me off. "Uh... just... hand lotion, honestly."

"Fuck," he laughed. "No wonder your hands are so soft."

My ears burned.

Levi sat back on the bed a bit further down than before, tucking one leg under him. As I watched, he ran his hands down my sides and pulled my jeans and underwear down enough to free my hips... Then, carefully, he eased his hand under my waistband, fingers agonizingly skimming my skin, and finally released me.

I almost couldn't look at myself. The sight of my naked sex rising from me, Levi pushing back the waistband until it cradled my balls... It was a kind of obscenity I wasn't ready for, and yet I desperately wanted this, was fighting to keep my backside flattened to the sheets to stop from bucking against his hand...

Levi paused, gazing down at me with something like fascination. Gently, he ran two fingers along my length until the muscle jumped in response. I bit back my noise.

"Huh," he smiled. "You're actually bigger than I thought, aren't you?"

The unexpected praise only embarrassed me further. I tipped my face down until my hair hid me, collar biting into my neck. "Is... am I... more than you?"

"Mm..." He shifted closer and encircled my base with his fingers, squeezing and urging another moan out. "Not quite," he decided.

The way this was going, I was at a point where I thought I'd never finish. Levi was drawing this out far longer than I felt I could take, thinking I'd just die in agony and desperation... but somehow, that was only making me anticipate it that much more.

I finally saw what he'd gotten from the nightstand - one of those clear bottles like those downstairs, this one with a pale green label. It looked half empty already. Levi popped it open and tipped it into his hand, squeezing clear liquid onto his palm, then set it aside.

"Let's see how this feels for you."

There was no hesitation this time. Levi wrapped his hand around all of me deliberately, his strokes slow as he turned his wrist in an effort to coat me in warm, slick fluid.

I melted. My body was shaking on and off with every upwards motion, my hands clasping each other for support above me. I restricted my breathing as if in fear of the sounds coming out every time I exhaled. No more teasing, no tempting me - Levi's strokes were firm, pace matching my heartbeat, milking sensation from deep inside me, and every so often, he would slow down, the pad of his thumb rolling over the tip to focus the pleasure there, mixing precum into the slick between his fingers...

"Ash."

I struggled to focus on the sound of my own name. Through the haze in my head I saw Levi leaning close to me, eyes locked on mine and yet never losing his pace...

There was a hard edge to his voice as he spoke. "You will warn me when you're close," he said. "Do you understand? I want you to tell me when you're going to come."

"I... I'm cl... already cl..." I couldn't keep my head up. Panting viciously, I let my neck go slack. The muscles in his arm tensed rhythmically as his hand moved over me, and my eyes drifted from there to the shape of his body, the torsion in his abdomen, the strange, dark color of his nipples -

"Look at me, Ash."

I snapped my head up and forced myself back to his eyes, ignoring the ache in my shoulders. I was engulfed in the fierce pulse of my muscles, the throb of blood in my sex, the heat and flexing pressure of Levi's hand stroking me, trapped in his dark and unwavering gaze-

I didn't know it could feel like this.

It was never this intense for me.

And suddenly, my mouth was spilling over before I realized what was coming out of it.

"Cl... close... so fucking... oh, god... I c - I can't - Levi, pl... please... please, I'm gonna come, I'm gonna f-fucking -"

"Good boy. Let go."

It was like my body had been waiting for his order. The fever in my stomach boiled over, every muscle in my core flexing, locking, trembling... Levi's hand slowed just as my body peaked, and I dissolved between his fingers as an ungodly noise gushed out of me.