All Comments on 'I'm a Loser'

What happened to you?

These recent "funny" stories are just painful to read.

Laughed the whole time

Funny story, Mr. Knight! Pretty much every poorly thought out LW "sue the boss predator" cliche possible.

I love the way he he had all his bases covered. He reminds me of Trump or Bloomberg. That's how you get what you want. Jack is probably short for "Jackoff."

I am a big fan, but this is terrible. You should have market tested.

What the actual fuck?

Im guessing this is supposed to be funny. Tisn't... 1 star

So far below the usual standard it leaves me speechless.

I know it’s supposed to be funny, but it fell kinda flat.

This story really felt forced. Not up to your usual high standards

This is the worst.

I usually enjoy your humor but this is idiotic trash..

An invitational with lots of garbage like this

that was funny

That was a fun story, but I guess not everyone can appreciate the humor. I'm afraid it won't be enough to stop the "I'll sue company xy for not enforcing their internal policies" cliché.

This one had me laughing out loud, literally - in fact my wife looked in on me giggling my ass off at this one.

Thanks for the gigglefest.

5/5

By the way, stay tuned for the March, 17th event. It might bring you even better stories and one of mine.

. . . I went ahead and gave it a 5. I’m trying to imagine getting into a conversation with two people fucking in front of me, and it’s almost working.

Sorry,

Definately not up to your usual work

That was kind of a hot mess, LOL! It was like watching an episode of Monty Python.

I used to look forward to new stories by HDK, now I flinch every time I see a new story pop up. It's been a sad, slow decline for you, HDK.

will certainly give you some grief. Who cares, loved the humor!

Perfect like the old song from the Beatles!

A nice skewering of the good old alienation of affection/enforcing the morals clause cliché. Next time I hear of a good workplace affair, I shall file a lawsuit as an interested third party. Wealth and fun, all in one fell swoop! Several chuckles and five stars.

Looking forward to HDK's Highway Song story, along with such notables as Ahazura, Mainefiddleheads, Woodmanone, DTIverson and many more. Taking the show on the road! Funny story, HDK. Randi.

To say, "this man has a deeply twisted imagination" is to understate the case!

Of course, on Lit that's high praise indeed. There is no one like HDK, and this story is testament to his wholly original and hopelessly strange mind. The pleasure and amazement the reader feels as this story unfurls, and one gradually figures out what is going on (no spoilers here!) is a unique gift from the one and only HDK.

One other point: far from repeating himself, as so many writers on Lit are prone to do (including myself), here he goes somewhere neither he nor, pretty much, anyone else has ever been.

Thanks--as always--to the master!

Your humble admirer, ohio

Thanks for the laugh. 4*

go back too the other story. that was your best writing.

Dude! That was fucked up but funny as hell! 5 Stars!

HDK has lost what little mind he had. Terrible story

Sad how your writing quality has dropped off over the years.

It was probably supposed to be funny. It failed there too.

Meh

But still fun and funny. And I'd probably give any HDK LW story a 5, just in appreciation for all the great stuff he's given us in the past.

I would have so have enjoyed to see this on Netflix 10 years ago with Jake and Maggie Gyllenhaal. Where does the time go?

Ergo the obvious score

Full marks *****

Disappointing. Not up to your usual standard.

Usually it's a good day when HDK posts a new story. Some of your funny stories are amongst the best on this site. But this one failed to entertain - IN MY OPINION. Which, of course, isn't worth the paper it's printed on. I simply wanted Jack to either beat the shit out of Brent or take his video and destroy Brent. You know. A good old BTB. I know that's not what you intended. But maybe next time?

2 stars

However, as usual, I find that I must, despite giving you a five, deplore the British cuckiness of your life in general, send my condolences to your wife and invite you to eat a used condom. As soon as I get a used condom, I will have you over for lunch. Is there a particular variety you prefer?

It seems that I will be able to give you two used condoms, since Randi says you will be writing a story for her event. The second can be dessert, after the entrée. I'll stock in some ice cream to go with that.

WTF were you drinking to write this? 2*

5 stars to you when I stop laughing.

Hooked

I guess it was funny, as several folks said it was. I've read a lot better from HDK.

Time to take s sabbatical and find your muse again.

Loved it. Great fun.

I wonder what HDK was smoking or drinking when he came up with this story? Certainly, not a MGD. You may have used every cliche in this genre. Not as funny as some of your older stories. Still gave it a 5.

Nicely done

Was this supposed to be funny and posted in the wrong section by mistake?

and each of them amusing in their own right.

Nice job!

I’m not quite sure what this was supposed to be, but if it was supposed to just be confusing and pretty bad, then it succeeded. I tend to like your stories, but this wasn’t even close to being good. I hope it was just something you typed up in a few minutes and threw up here rather than something you spent some time on. I also hope this isn’t an indication of what your future stories are going to look like. I’m going to pretend I didn’t read this and look forward to your next story.

Well, it was different. ****

Reading this was like looking at every bad golf swing ever made. You can't get them out of your mind. This story's like that. Ham-handed tropes beaten to death, pan fried and served up, hilariously indigestible. So thanks for that and yikes!! Which was, of course, the point. I gave it a 5* for the damage done to the minds of the rest of us.

You are sad.

The others who commented don't seem to see the humor but I do. Thanks HDK.

That's the best thing I can say about this submission.

Thanks, HDK, but it would be great to return to your more typical style next time.

Will look forward to it.

I just loved it! Putting it in “loving wife’s” really caught me off guard and by the end I was just laughing! It was fun and very plausible. Well done!

You bored HDK?

But thanks for trying. I hope more people like it, but slap stick just doesn't do it for me. Imagine the Three Stooges doing a porn video. Neither erotic nor funny. Guess this was supposed to be a parody?

It would be funnier if you had Pete Buttigieg seducing Joe Biden so that Bernie Sanders could get the nomination free and clear, but then Pete and Joe fall in love so Pete's husband seduces Elizabeth Warren and knocks her up which forces Adam Shift to conduct an investigation of how Donald Trump got Pete Buttigieg pregnant. The entire biology departments of Harvard Yale and Berkley will testify how Pete could get pregnant, but admitting that the child will still be born a bastard. Of course Jerry Nadler assigns himself to personally collect the Donald's sperm for the paternity test, as many times as it takes to get a positive result.

Thanks to everyone who read and commented on this story. It seems some people don't care for my brand of humor, but some do. The score indicates it is divided down the middle, if we can manage any faith in scores. Three is dead center in scoring.

I thank my buddy the used condom guy for his generous offer. I fear he may not realize no cucks were harmed, or created in this story. There were no cuckolds, hot wives, or willing cucks. Twentyseven, this is the market test, but thanks for the suggestion. I do want to thank those who said nice things about it, for whatever reason. My buddy, Ohio, has been busting my chops for years. He's still one of the best writers this site has ever seen and I urge him to post some new stories.

I have posted more than a few clever revenge stories over the years and I still enjoy a good one. I have noticed over the past few years that total revenge is almost the only requirement for a story to get a score over 4.00. There are more than a few popular writers in LW who have one theme, write it over and over, and get decent scores. That doesn't interest me too much these days. I am simply looking for a different way of thinking about situations, from a wife cheating to the husband's reaction. It seems many of the husbands in stories wind up wealthy and single because their wife cheated at work. Readers love it, but really? Why bother writing it? We all know that fantasy by heart.

Randi has organized an invitational which is going live here on Literotica on March 17th, 2020. The theme, Highway Song, is meant to feature stories of action, romance, peril, love and redemption. There is no action- adventure category on Lit, so the stories will be posted all over the map. Lit has categories labeled fetish, non-erotic, and even toys and masturbation, but not action-adventure. Go figure. I know everyone is waiting to see what sort of brilliant story I manage. I look forward to the readers' reactions.

Above all, most writers desire readers for their stories. and comments on them. You have been very kind to me for many years in that regard, and I thank you all. I don't plan on going away. Sad?

Thanks for the great read.

And once again the final twist, very well done.

I just hope he learns to not trust his sister, for anything.

To a tee! Thanks, that was a lot of fun!

Loved the twists and turns in this one. Very strange and funny story.

that HDK is totally original and a comic genius, spend a few moments contemplating this line:

"Well, shit!" I exclaimed. "It's fucking scum like you that cause good people like us to try to take you to court to get some of that money you've got."

I rest my case. ohio

Yo need to slow down smokin‘ bad stuff, makes yo brain swampy, mon.

No Spliffs fo this drivel, no funny

Thumbs‘a down, mon

You have some pretty good tales in your library, but lately the well has been dry. Can we get back to more standard LW tales, with humor as a "part" of the tale, not the sole reason for it?

People with no sense of humour won’t like it, but you have another good one here.

A simple flick of the wrist, another trope or three skewered, deftly and with humor. Rather like Cyrano, now that I think of it. Clearly, I am envious. Brilliantly done, sir.

Another admirer,

GA

I know you meant this to be humorous, but you failed badly. Not sure why it's in loving wives either since nobody in it is married. Swing and a miss, one star for the 5 minutes it took you to write this turd.

...and a good laugh without having to include an Australian epilogue of bantered one liners.

Smokepole

It's such a breath of fresh air. Laughing gas, to be precise. Plot twist after plot twist. 5* easy.

what was that? wrong cat btw, wasn't a loving wife in this story. feels like u flushed this crap out just to see who and/or how many hang-on-ers u have. well I'm not one liked some of ur stories but this one was weird and a bit dumb and again wrong cat. maybe try humor/satire cat

What happened to harddaysknight? Who is doing such a bad job of impersonating him?

And then you read some crap story like this. Disappointing at best.

The only part of this story I cared for was the comments. Witnessing many of HDK's admirers pretend they enjoyed this was a touching show of respect and support for a true class act of the genre. Everyone strikes out once in awhile, and it's wonderful to have friends there to catch you when you fall.

Something triggered me thinking wouldn't it be funny if...

Still was a nice light read.

May take a hit for not putting in humor and satire.

Hilarious!!! Had me fooled till the end...

And you wonder why your work is taking a beating?!? You are in a rut my friend.

Very Enjoyable Erotic Humor!

I hope you run outta Beatles song titles soon, if you insist on writing this kind of crap.

What a contrite little story you pieced together, kind of feel sorry for your keyboard.

Was great

HDK, that was incredible.

I didn't expect it at all.

I still can't stop laughing.

Almost as funny as the story are the comments...

Some of the most stupid shit I’ve ever read!

Thanks for the laughter!

Pretty good one.

Pretty good lowbrow humor. You didn't miss much with that one.

Saw where you going with this one but I didn't quite get there...4*

Quick little tail! Very funny!

Absolute crap

Like

Most of your recent work. Give it up. Pack up your own and quit you disgust me

5* this should be in humor section, lol.

One of the few that were disappointing. It was too repetitious to continue so at one point I just skipped to the punch line ending.

1 star - just too stupid to even comment

...who among the commenters have zero sense of humor. No tears of laughter for me, but lots of chuckles and smiles as I read it again.

Keep 'em comin'.

I know it's supposed to be funny, but all i could think of was how dumb it was.

I don´t agree with the comments about it being a “dumb” story. I think it is hilariously funny! Thanx for the short, funny story. LMO

When an attempt at humor misses the mark, it often is simply irritating. That is the case with this submission. The reader plows along, hoping to find a laugh, or at least some sense of satisfaction, but this mess of a story never congeals into anything of substance. Understandably, that just pisses people off. 2 stars.

Try 2.47.

Didn’t like it even before the end. 1 star only because 0 stars doesn’t show up.

Bill S.

Should be in humor and satire. But not really that funny either. Not one of your best

Truly stupid plot.

Too funny.

S T U P I D

Predictable but funny especially the trans gender ending

Started off as if the guy was special needs, the rest of it confirmed it. I'm assuming this is a piss take on all the clown writers that write about such stupidity as alienation of affection and non frat policies etc., If so well done, you nailed it.