All Comments on 'In College One Day'

Spoiled by the crap about condoms and pills

This is story land not the real world

I really liked how you built it up and brought it to a, shall we say, climax! Nicely done. Will there be more when Jane (Pixie) wakes up? At any rate, Kathy sounded pleased at the end.

I noticed something that I hope you will take as constructive criticism. I'm preparing to submit my own stories and I realize that I often storyboard everything in present tense. Eventually, though, my intention is to narrate the whole story in the past tense. I noticed that your writing switches between the two. Mostly, because of the sheer intensity of what you were describing, I didn't mind it. However, it might be a good idea to keep it to only one tense. I'm no expert at writing and, perhaps, you should consider reading some of the very good writing style essays in Literotica to get some more clarity and ideas around this.

Couldn't disagree more with the person complaining about condoms, etc. Great story, and I emphasize the word "story", because you really told a nice, satisfyingly full and immersive one. And the erotic descriptions were tremendous - thanks!

It was a great story, but, please, please, please, find a tense and stay with it.

This is what I call FUCK LIT!! If you're going to write about fucking then WRITE about it! This was almost as good as DOING the fucking!!!!! I don't think for a second that my cock was fooled - but I did cum twice with this last bit of hard hard hardcore fucking and well applied hand work! (I'd a hell of a lot rather had a pussy on my cock for that part of the exercise instead of my fist!!!)

As an author I would say you do fantastic and I can't help but wonder how well you fuck personally! Are you anywhere nearly as good as the two principals in this fuck story??????

No Stars

I liked the story, I liked the build to the sexual encounter. Please continue to entertain us.

Thanks for the feedback. Yes, I am bad about changing tense and for those who find it jarring, I apologize. I write my memories and they don't always stay in the same tense. I've tried to clean up my next submission - yes, there is a next chapter in moderation and probably another one or two chapters about the same weekend.

'Sex' is not the word to describe a woman's genitals, it's pussy. Apart from that, really hot. Would like to read a sequel.

BUT, to paraphrase "The Hunt for Red October"...One tense only, please...Otherwise, I hope that there is a sequel...

So hot and well done

i think i'm going to enroll for some classes...

very hot!!