All Comments on 'In the Air Tonight'

Well, an interesting story right up to the final paragraph which negated it.

The final paragraph really fucked it up ...was great up til then.

She cheated before she wanted the divorce??!! Why?? She is a cheater and will be a cheater a lifelong!!! He killed his enemy and has to live with that guilt!! And you are a dreadful writer and we have to live with your crap!!! What is more worse???

Really silly

5 stars

wonderful till last paragraph.

the wife had humiliated him, her daughters, and her son. Why would the children favor the mother over the father? What brainwashing has occurred that removed the children from the father. This story alone is why cheating spouses should never obtain custody of children. 3* due to the terrible ending, the man hit a man, it wasn't his fault the man fell in the pool and could now swim, where is the law that requires on to rescue someone else, yes its a moral thing to do, but is it a legal requirement, and why would it be?

Interesting, well-written but, given his planned ending, why on earth did the author emphasize that the children resented the break-up of the family and the son idolized his father so much? It made the last paragraph totally unconvincing-what a let-down!

The only ones who read this story from beginning to end , it seems, were Detln and myself.

We understood the feelings of Phil, his wife and later the hatred the family had for the harm it did to the lives of the Ex Wife and her children, purely because of a self centered man who blamed everyone but himself.

The comments about the last paragraph being rediculous are just ignorant, they ignor the damage done to the little boy by the destructive lyrics of self revenge.

As for comment on the guilt and living with it for the rest of his life, that was posted by someone who lives in cloud cuckoo land

The pen is mightier than the sword, Wel done Swingerjoe 5 *****

He lost his wife, not because she cheated on him but because he didn't love her. The affair was a result of his indifference, not her weakness.

I loved the ending because Phil killed his marriage, killed the man who slept with his wife, killed the memory of a father and got away scot free. But his son, who he claimed to love, saw through the verdict and offered his own judgement.

How come the Jury aquitted him but his family did'nt?

I get it that the family had a hard time of it because of his interview, but can't see that they came to the court to see him convicted and not out of curiosity whether he'd done the crime at all.

Entirely predictable and ho-hum rendering of swingerjoe's constant theme. Every story is exactly the same, every comment he makes, exactly the same. Boring babble from the king of trolls.

It was OK.

I understand the son dropping the drum sticks in front of his father as a show of joining his sisters and mother in ending their relationship.

I also understand the kids being upset with the harassment they received because of their mother's affair, but why aren't they upset with her? Yes the father brought it public, but she did the crime...

Why not take any action against the guy when the affair was fresh. He had money and could've ruined his reputation easily. Who would want to hire a home remodel expert if all they were going to do was fuck the clients wife?

All in all, it was an OK story, but it seemed to end without a bang.

Although a really good ending, I do not believe the son would have turned his back at that time. I think he would have been happy that the man who broke up his family had been punished. Tom deserved what he got.

This writer seems incapable of an original thought. The same formula followed, story after story. The same message: Cheating is good. You must accept cheating or Bad Things Will Happen! Just tiresome repetition of the same old theme. "Consequences" can only happen to non-cheaters. Mind-numbing crap from a bad writer with little skill.

A decent story, told from two main perspectives, then the detective's, which wasn't necessarily relevant except as a way to explain the case. I guess I don't know much of Phil Collins' actual biography, so I don't know which parts are pseudo factual (whatever that means). From Phil's perspective, he was a sad victim of his wife's infidelity. From the wife, he comes out looking like an ass. Of course, being neglected in the marriage is a very common excuse for infidelity, and we don't know how much of that was justification or not. I think the son turning in the drumsticks was a bit overkill. I have a friend who had a soccer team in grad school whose name was "I Hate Phil Collins". He just hated his music, but he was a "The Smiths" fan, so there was some bias there. Being a Phil Collins fan isn't supposed to be "cool".

Nice story; well written; I don't normally like it when murder is the revenge since it lacks imagination, but this was a big exception! Well done!

People need to stop conflating writing skill with liking a storyline.

Swingerjoe is a capable writer. He's also consistent that relationships aren't black and white, and that cheating isn't in his view a mortal and cardinal sin.

This story is clearly an attempt to show a twist on the revenge porn that is one of the fetishes in this category. So there is revenge, but we see the protagonist isn't this simplistic victim. It turns out he was more than just neglectful. He put himself and his career ahead of the literal health of his wife and family, not even cutting short a tour when she was in the hospital. He wasn't present in the lives of his children. He favored his son, likely to the detriment of his daughters. He seemed to be a regular philanderer for years before this incident. (Not proven, but likely given the nature of rock stars and the public photos... and the tendency for philanderers to also be very jealous.) This is a reasonable character. I imagine many of us have known someone like that, either directly or indirectly. The marriage was over by the time she slept with someone, which is reflected by the fact she is asking for a divorce before he ever confronts her. He'd already killed the marriage, she just hadn't gotten him the paperwork. He also did literally kill someone.

The wife is selfish too, she doesn't go out and get a job and find activities to add value and give her an outlet outside the children. She sees in his songs, only how they impact how they affect her, not the reflection of the pain she caused. Artists write about their experiences and regularly write about breakups and betrayals. It is common enough, I can't quite see the reaction of the public being as extreme as Joe portrayed, but hey, his story.

Anyway, dialogue was good, characters were complex and it was interesting to see how the perspectives of each were heavily biased based on their self-preserving images. It was also a good extension of how the repercussions of the revenge porn theme can continue to impact the family and children later, and what that sort of anger says about the person involved.

You may not like the fact that the guy didn't get to be a pure hero, but criticizing the quality of writing is silly. At least give him valid critiques if you really have an issue with his writing skills. We're all here as part of the same community, even if people have different tastes in storylines.

I have to add a comment here in response to yours. I wouldn't say that I'm a huge Phil Collins fan, but I have always enjoyed his music, both with Genesis and his solo career. When I first learned that this song was about his divorce, I was on his side. I thought it was righteous of him to express his anger at his wife's betrayal. Any emotional pain and humiliation that may have caused her was well-deserved.

Then I read an interview with his ex-wife from a British paper where she gave her perspective. It seems he wasn't such a good guy after all. It was illuminating to see both sides of the story instead of just one (as we often see here.) That provided me with the motivation to write this story from both perspectives.

By the way, in real life, Phil sang "In the Air Tonight" on live TV, with a paint can and brush lying on a table beside his piano. (His wife had cheated on him with a painter.)

Capable writer? Capable of what? Writing mediocre stories with no tension, no drama and miserable and unlikable characters? Swingerjoe is a bad writer, writing propaganda for his crusade. He's never written anything worth reading, just propaganda pieces with the same tired message. Two stars for this poorly executed plot.

From this cuck hack. 1*

I held my nose and gave it 4 stars, because it's just that well written & SJ deserved it. Unfortunately like the majority of his stories he was again pushing an agenda.

Really, unless the mother poisoned the relationship, no kids would behave this way with just their father. If they were that upset it would have destroyed their relationship with both parents. But that wouldn't have matched with SJ's agenda.

You see, there can never be any consequences for cheating on your partner or fucking another mans wife. Even though Tom reaped what he had sown, in SJ's eyes he should have got off Scott free. It was only sex right? I mean it didn't matter that it destroyed a family or that up until that point the marriage was potentially salvageable. It was fun and by gosh they deserved it no matter who it hurt.

This is why SJ can't understand BTB stories. In his view there shouldn't be any consequences for destroying a mans life and family. It always has to be that man's fault it happened. In reality there's usually more than enough blame to go around and there is never a good reason to break your marriage vows. If you're so unhappy you're seeking others, just end your marriage, it's very simple. BTB stories are basically escapism because justice is rarely served and far too many get fucked over by the courts, their spouses or the spouses lovers. They're fantasy stress relievers so that bad things don't actually happen.

Usual shit from swingerjoe. Don't worry, your ass monkeys will be around soon.

It is incredible that you seem to have read a different story than the one I wrote!

In my story, all three kids resented the mother for what she did to the family. In yours, the kids somehow sided with the mother (because they sat with her in the courtroom?)

In my story, the kids all turned their backs on their father because he MURDERED SOMEONE. (And because he was a neglectful father.) In your story, the father should have been embraced by the children?

In your story, you believe that I believe Tom should have gotten off Scot-free. In the story I actually wrote, Tom ended up DEAD!

One of my main issues with BTB stories is that we only see one side of the story. Every husband is a flawless hero. Every wife is an irredeemable, evil, slut. Real life isn't nearly so simplistic. People are flawed -- ALL people. The wife in my story committed an unforgivable, marriage-ending act. So did the husband. Whose crime was worse? The husband who neglected his family and emotionally abused his wife for years? Or the wife who spread her legs for another man on two occasions? I say they're both to blame.

Another problem I have with BTB stories is that we only see the consequences of cheating, but never the consequences of revenge. The heroic husband will insult and humiliate his wife, and the entire family will rally around him. In many stories, the husband will commit murder and/or assault and get away with it Scot-free. In real life, there are consequences to murder, assault, and other forms of revenge.

Thanks for your comment, and thanks for giving my story a chance.

I think some of this criticism is way off base. I enjoyed hearing both sides of the story. Yes, there are two sides to every story and although obviously cheating is never a good thing, the story of how they grew apart was very credible.

As far as the writing, I thought there could have been more tension built into the story but I didn't think it was badly written.

The story took a nose dive for me in the third chapter. It takes a really cold person to stand and watch someone drown. I think I would have liked it better had he jumped in and saved the guy but then that would have seemed contrived so maybe not.

I gave the story 3 stars.

Great ending. The piece of shit got his comeuppance. 😂😂😂

First it must be said that in terms of literary skills showcased ...swingerjoe is playing chess and 95 % of other Literotica authors are fumbling with checker pieces . When I read one of his stories , I automatically brace for challenges and gauntlets with a measure of substance to be thrown at warp speed at my personal paradigm.

If this was an exercise in executing the credible articulation of multiple and disparate POVs bound together with how mutual events ( as opposed to facts ) are perceived and filtered by the individual characters: then this was a success. Everything is subjective, there are no facts just ask Nietzsche.

Frankly, I have no tears for floundering Mister Fixit. You take a man's money to work on his castle , steer clear of boinking the queen with a grievance, however justified her complaint may be. Stay professional or at least get a motel room , because there's mega karma incurred in where they trysted. Did the Phil play around ? He probably did, but not under the marital roof.

I admired the symbolic power of drumsticks being returned to paternal sender. But the reason to me should have been expounded upon that he was a sub par father. Taking a swing at Tom who caressed wife even Phil was on scene . That's ' hard wired turf scrapping. Don't condone it, but I understand it.

Tom Schilling had multiple character issues, besides being a Giant fan ( as a mile high resident I appreciated that nuance). Bottom line : he was casual to proximity of body of water with man who he had filched both money and honey. He should have taken either swimming or self defense classes .

Tom disdained professional ethics and put himself to be in precarious position of needing to be proffered a life preserver from Phil . Fatal mistake. Everyone else has a chance at redemption and doggypaddling away from their dysfunctions with diligence. Maybe one day, Phil's son will learn to keep time with his dad. I hope so.

The story got so choppy with POV swapfest . I like the concept albeit disagreeing with rationale for ' Big finish '. It's not a home run five star read in my estimation, but there's no doubt swingerjoe further established heavyhitter credentials, who's worthy of attention when he steps up to plate because getting a paltry scratch single is rarely on the SJ agenda. I thank him for sharing.

This story had a lot of elements to it that are tough to judge. I really like the grizzly, raw emotions that are played out, but also think the ending went a little of the rails. Perhaps that was Joe's intention. I am am eternal optimist so head hoped for a jasper ending where the kids and ex are concerned, but can't fault the author for making his characters more real, faults and all. The sons reaction at the end was about the only part I really didn't care for. Anyhow thank you for sharing a very good descriptive tale. I don't usually enjoy a lot of your work Joe (not personal, just not into swinging or sharing type stories), but this was a very good read. 4*

Thanks for the story. I thought it okay. Three Stars.

No problem with the ending, just a couple non fatal things along the way:

- Ex wife and the guy only had sex twice, yet Phil's private investigator caught both occasions. That seems unlikely and no real purpose served in writing that in.

- I don't see the kids and ex attending the trial, given that the prior media/public attention was a nightmare. So it doesn't feel quite right. If she were the current wife yes....but an ex, not so much.

Phil should have confronted them and fired the contractor when he witness the initial inappropriate behavior. I mean, why would you pay that guy to hang around your house?

Phil had honed revenge by music to a fine art. He was far too into humiliating his ex and her lover that way to fall prey to the urge to do something that might get in the way of it by impeding his drumming or giving anyone a reason to sympathize with the objects of his wrath. A more likely scenario would be him following up that party with the debut of a new song about his ex-wife's lover smirking at him when they saw each other at a party that would dredge their affair up and put it back in the spotlight again.

Slampuppy’s comments get more laughable and pretentious every day. Heavy hitter? Swingerjoe? That’s hilarious. ROGLMAO. Heavy hitter! Swingerjoe! He’s the running joke of Literotica! You and his lickspittles are the only people on here that take him seriously. He’s a miserable failure of a writer, spending his time sniping at authors he envies who are better than he is. Please, man, give us a break. Heavy hitter!!! Pull your nose out of your thesaurus and join the real world. The only thing Joe is interested in is taking shots at his betters. He writes his little asinine jabs at real writers, and this is just another of those. It’s embarrassing.

Well constructed and pretty fair result maybe.

It’s not said if he WAS cheating, but in any case, if she was unhappy then get a divorce, DON’T CHEAT!

“We had sex twice” – So much for it being a “one-time thing”!

“When he was, he made us all miserable” – It didn’t seem that Phil, Jr. was miserable!

Would have been better without the son turning on him. He doesn't have to accept him, he doesn't have to idolize him, but the rejection was too cruel.

If someone you loved murdered someone, you wouldn't feel differently about them?

Revenge has consequences. That's pretty much the entire point of the story.

Occasionally SJ has a good story. This one was mediocre at best. Not one of his fans because of comments on other writers stories. However, will give him credit for trying which is better than most readers could do. There were moments in this one which did touch on the emotions in a somewhat realistic way.

Lets face it. There are only so many scenarios an author can write about. The archive is filled with them. When a story can realistically engage the reader, possibly emotionally, then you will have a great story. In this one, there was only one part that I felt engaged with the lead character. The rest is bleh!! Including the ending. 3 stars. Maybe next time.

If proven, yes. WE know he's guilty, but his son doesn't, and the man he idolized was acquitted, and he can't accept that?

I guess he didn't think as much of his father as was indicated. I can understand his ex-wife and daughters, they never thought much of him anyway.

I've seen this excuse too many times!

So he was indifferent, hell maybe he even DID have affairs.

Then get a DIVORCE. A person, man or woman who cheats is a cheater, the circumstances may mitigate SOMEWHAT, but it is still cheating.

but the author's hidden agenda really isn't all that well hidden.

Little Phil can shove his drumsticks up his ass and his mother and sisters can go to hell.

Infidelity is no less primal or evil.than brutal violence..

Just because our society wrongly excuses fucking around, it doesn't take away millennia of primal, violent reactions which are quite natural.

More violent acts are linked to infidelity than are ever reported.

Everything from murder to suicide.

Vanessa is an unsympathetic character that wanted no repercussions from not only cheating on her husband but fucking a married father.

She is a truly disgusting bitch that started this train wreck.

Phil had some unsympathetic characteristics but was certainly more of a victim in all this than the asshole that fucked his wife or Vanessa.

If my son were in Phil's shoes, I would have hid the damn body for him. Nobody fucks with my family.

This is a pathetic example of love, fidelity and loyalty. He deserved a better family.

Very good writing about pathetic people. Fuck them.

An acquittal and actual innocence are not the same thing. I imagine OJ's kids could tell us all about that. It was difficult to write about the criminal case against him, as there had to be enough evidence to convict, but not enough for him to be found guilty. That's why I enlisted the help of two former LEO's to lend their perspectives. I suppose I could have built a better case, but this story wasn't really meant to be a police procedural.

It wasn't murder. At the most, even if they proved what happened it''s negligent homicide.

And yes, homicide IS a synonym for murder, but not as used in this context.

enough drama and interesting story to get my votes; but not comfortable with his family walking away. Hell, he was found innocent. His children were obviously brainwashed by his ex-bitch. Boys from a divorce should be raised by their fathers

regardless of the divorce reasons.

Entertaining. Good story around the Phil Collins tune-i didnt even know the lyrics until this story.

only the ones that love you. TK U MLJ LV NV

I thouht the story was well written and was told almost perfectly. The court room scene was less than perfect on procedural things. Other than that it held my attention for the whole story, which for me is something in it's self. I enjoyed the story. I enjoyed the writing.

I thought it began as predictable as could be but the end was satisfactory.

Thank you. I enjoyed the 3 perspectives you brought to bear on the subject. Very well done. And the ending was...honest, believable, appropriate.

Shit happens, I usually don't read about it.

She cheated because her husband was so busy busting his ass to give her the lifestyle SHE wanted? He was grumpy when he was around, so instead of helping him change his demanding work life she cheats? She takes his kids and moves to NJ? She blames him for people knowing about her cheating and breaking up the marriage? In the end, the son somehow thinks his father is a bad guy even though the jury found him not guilty? Even if he was guilty he rejects his father for killing the man who broke up his family and fucked up his childhood? This story is a pathetic attempt to minimize and to defend cheating. It is as poorly reasoned as it is written.

I'm not even going to wait until all of the comments are in. Sugna wins the "Doesn't Get It" award for this story. Thank you all for your entries.

I now have to change my favourite SwingerJoe story.

I'm not sure that this story completely met the objective Joe set for it; to demonstrate that the person who extracts revenge may suffer consequences just as badly as the target of that revenge; but it went very close.

I thought it was one of the few stories where switching first-person narrator in the middle of the story worked well. Reading Phil's story left me feeling as though there had to be a lot happened before the wife's infidelity that was unexplained. Why would a man who had no previous cause to suspect his wife of infidelity behave in the LW stereotypical manner and immediately hire a private investigator rather than talk about it with his wife? After reading the background given by the wife, a lot more became clear.

The ultimate punishment. To no longer be respected by his son and number one fan. Neat.

Lue

Of course Sugna doesn't get it. Your complexity, subtlety, amazing webs of prose, spun out by your brilliant intellect can only be appreciated by such mental giants as Luedon and yourself.

Few writers can ever aspire to the lofty heights of genius you have reached. You are alone on the mountaintop and ordinary mortals can only look to you for inspiration and worship hopelessly, hoping that you will bless us all. The very earth yearns in anticipation of your next fascinating pronouncement from on high. Your worshipful groveling fans await.

I agree a lot not all with Sugna. His children would have had to really hate him to be that upset if he was found not guilty. Confused, torn but not crying and/or giving up on drums because their father was found not guilty. If they were upset that he was indeed a murderer it would have come earlier not with the verdict.

. . . to match the eloquence of some of the previous commenters. May I just say that I thought that this story was remarkable, exceptionally well written and organized, and just a pure pleasure to read. Additionally, it was an authentic learning experience. Thank you SJ.

She cheated not all her fault, he was no saint, tom was no saint. He gets away with the. Crime. Life goes on . This shit happens often.

who cleans his EGO and loses his Son. TK U MLJ LV NV

The burden of proof is to be beyond a shadow of a doubt. Your court room portrayal wasn't even up to the standards of a Perry Mason fan. The problem isn't that a man drowned, and someone who might be glad the man drowned was at the party. The problem is having to demonstrate overwhelming facts that the accused killed the victim. Your circumstantial evidence wasn't, in fact it was laughable. We have evidence that the accused was at the party, may have been in the back yard of the party, and the accused has an injured hand. Beyond a shadow of a doubt? Not even very circumstantial. The guys a contractor, and could have been injured on the job, could have been injured falling into the pool. What was his blood alcohol? Being drunk might explain why a guy who could not swim was standing next to the deep end of a swimming pool. And as to motive, do you really think the accused's wife is the only wife this contractor ever seduced? Its likely there are any number of husband's who would like to see this contract pussy hound dead. High priced defense lawyers would have every bit of dirt on the contractor, showing he was a philanderer, with any number of people who might have attended or sneak into the party to kill him. The problem is there is no substantial evidence that the accused killed the man. Wanted to, would have liked to, glad it happened, yeah. But actually did it? No evidence. So it is a farce to depict this case even went to trial.

Now to the personal fall out and consequences, that was just lame. Why would the wife and children even attend the trial? Oh, so you could setup your rejection of dad punch line. The jury could not make themselves believe he did it, but his children did. Even being reminded that their mother lied and cheated and betrayed their father, its their father who they think is a murderer. OK, if that fits your idea of reality, it is after all your fantasy.

I appreciate your time and effort. I wish it was more believable and logical. In the future maybe stick more with what you know.

first, being gone a lot is a whores BS excuse for everything. My husband was gone to war for to long, my husband was on the road to long, my husband was at work to much, over and over it's the same crappy excuse. Then why weren't they complaining about that quarter of million dollars house. Or than 60 thousand dollar Lexus. Better yet, why wasn't her lazy ass working. And as far as the kids, your mom is the one that put the dead guys dick in her scuzzy snatch, and they turn their backs on dad? Even OJ's kids didn't do that and we know he did it. Kids that would turn their backs on the man that gave thing everything don't deserve to be called his. Get some side chick knocked up and try again. The first set are about as loyal as their mother.

it was a good read swingerjoe

The story was okay, but I still have a problem with a story told in first person... by many persons. That is attempting to avoid the inherent difficulties of writing in first person. Go narrative if you can't make the first person work without more than one POV.

I agree.

If an impartial jury can't find him guilty, how can his children who must have SOME feeling for him, especially the son that idolized him, turn their backs on him?

They were there when the defense showed that the victim's wife, however unlikely, had equal motive as well as opportunity to commit the crime, as well as the knowledge of his inability to swim.

As others have said, he has already shown the ability to take his revenge through his music, and as the detective himself said, he should have been THANKING him for the giving him the drive to restart his career!

The court case in Joe's story is held within the adversarial system that many of us inherited from the English. The court's decision has to be 'guilty' or 'not guilty'.

(The Scots have added a neat one in between: 'not proven', which probably would have been the case for Phil if the trial had been held in Scotland.)

If we could get somebody re-write Joes story in France, with the court being an inquisitorial rather than an adversarial one, with the requirement being to find the truth, maybe the son could have kept his drumsticks.

Lue

A lot of people seem to think Phil was innocent because the jury declared him not guilty. Have you all forgotten the fact that the first chapter of this story was told from Phil's perspective, and he admitted to punching this man and watching him drown?

No, Joe, we haven't forgotten. But only we and Phil know that.

Phil Jr has seen a jury of his peers acquit his father, has heard other ways the victim could have been killed, so why should he doubt his hero?

I just don't give a damn. It wasn't premeditated or even intended. He simply decked a waste of skin that had it coming and left him to his fate when he couldn't swim.

He wasn't a loss to humanity and his dipshit wife is better off without him.

The court case didn't bother me. They could have found him guilty and I still would have hated his family for their reactions.

Hope Vanessa dies of vagina rot and the children all get involved with cheating, disloyal people.

I'll say it again. If my son or father was involved with involuntarily killing a dipshit that fucked his wife, I would make the damn body disappear for him.

Phil isn't a murderer. He was a betrayed and seriously angry man who was as imperfect as any of us.

I could easily get jail time if some asshole fucked my wife.

Emotional violence hurts more than physical.

I would rather be cut or bruised by my wife than betrayed with another man.

This was readable and written good in my opinion but it was written about pathetic people that I wouldn't want to have anything to do with.

I have sympathy for Phil somewhat but no one else.

I liked it I thought it was a great story but it needs a chapter 2

Just goes to show you never know who you will meet at a party. Some men don't like it when you screw their wife. Thanks for sharing

Once again a thoughtful contribution from a superior author. Just a couple of observations. First, it was never murder, it was manslaughter and he was lucky to get off. Second, it is difficult to find much fault with the wife (as opposed to the other man who seems little more than a plot device). Third, why are all you people siding with a selfish, philandering sociopath and a coward to boot? If there is message in this story it is that you can con the public for a very long time but you can't con your family.

Well written!

I was going to comment but silentsound said everything I wanted to say, and probably better than ii could have.

If I remember correctly 6 years passed, making the son 9 or 10. That's certainly old enough for his response to be plausible, if not likely. I don't really see why so many are hung up on that. I have to wonder if SJ had a "pen name" (for his pen name) and had posted under such, what THOSE comments would have been like?!? I thought it was a good effort given a length of only 3 pages.

Taking real events and filling in the blanks with imaginative fiction. Clever. Very clever.

I enjoyed this story. The multiple povs gave a well rounded view of the situation. I found myself sympathizing with both spouses, as well as the kids. All of them were victims in some way. Nicely done.

Unlike many others, i didn't find the son's reaction at the end unbelievable. The way i interpreted it, he wasn't angry at the father for getting away with murder. He was angry at him for turning their family drama into a public spectacle twice. These kids had to not only endure a painful divorce, but had to do it in front of the world because of his father's humilating song. Then, when things calmed down, the death happened to reignite that flame. That was why he was angry.

When assessing an attack, it is always wise to consider the civilian casualties. We all would love to believe that people can isolate the damage to only affect the target when they are seeking retribution, but this is not the case. There is always fallout. Kids are usually the victims. So I can believe that the son saw his father differently after the dust settled. The aura of perfection was broken. His father wasn't someone to be idolized. He was human. It was that realization that we saw being acted out.

Good news is, in time, he will grow up snd realize that life isnt black and white. He will understand his father's feelings and why he did what he did.

You definitely got some interesting conversations going Swingerjoe. Always a pleasure.

Kudos for garnering so much response, so many strong reactions.

I can agree that IF the children got to positively KNOW that he'd committed man slaughter, they'd react. What I did'nt see in the story was that they DID get positive confirmation of the fact. If they did'nt have info that the jury did'nt have, their reaction is implausible.

A very good read at any rate. Like you stuff. And agree totally that there're always to sides to an issue and sentient humans should endeavour to see the balance in all things. Slimeballs on the other hand - in a fantasy world - should always get rogered;-)

Well done Sir! Time for him to turn his back on the loser wife and ungrateful offspring. Some women should never be married and some kids should never be born. I know it's a hard and hateful fact but still a fact.

All actions have consequences. This being the good,the bad and the ugly in a relationship. Actions impact the entire nuclear family. (Boy there is a word I have not used in a bunch of years) 5 stars

@Twentyseven - There was no proof of his philandering, just his wife's suspicions based on gossip rags.

@javmor79 - HE didn't make the family a public spectacle twice, the second time was all on the DA. He had to defend himself!

All in all, he paid an extremely high price for fame. I really liked your presentation.

OK so he's accused of a crime, we readers know he did it but where did his family magically decide from a young child to his older daughters that he was guilty? just doesn't add up as part of the story.

The story shows about the only evidence the DA had was he attended the same party as the victim... so nothing in the trial would give them such an idea... and nothing in his behaviour to the kids in your story would ever make them think he did it.

Ex was even only worried he MAY be involved after all he never touched her... so don't get the jump to a conclusion that his family thought he was guilty.

Phil's hand was busted. There was a contusion on the victim's face. Phil was in the backyard by the pool at some point that night. He was the only person at the party with a motive to cause harm to Tom. He lied to the detective when questioned. I mean...aside from having video footage or a signed confession, he is as guilty as anyone could possibly be. From a legal standpoint, however, there isn't enough proof to justify a conviction. Every person in that courtroom -- including the jury -- knew he was guilty, but they could not legally render a guilty verdict.

Everyone knows OJ killed his ex-wife and her lover, yet he got away with it. Everyone knows Casey Anthony killed her daughter. Everyone knows Hillary Clinton violated numerous federal laws and used her charitable foundation to enrich herself. A not guilty verdict in a court of law is not the same as innocence. Even a ten-year-old boy knows the difference.

I think this is proof enough for anybody to know that swingetjoe is mentally Disturbed. Like most Trump supporters who are stupid and uneducated. .... it woukd seem swingrr joe is one of them.

Anyone who makes the argument that she was mushandling some emails is the same thing as getting away with murder is a SERIOUS idiot.

It speaks volumes about swinget joe's grasp on reality.

I liked it and can't understand why people would think about revenge ( not murder) as bad . The cheater should pay , they betray not only there husband/wife but their children extended family and friends. Divorce affects everyone one around you. Try and make the marriage work or get a divorce but don't just go fuck someone else while trying to stay in your marriage so your lifestyle can stay the same. As some would say childish I would also spread all pics, videos and info to all family and friends and especially to the other party in the affairs spouse. This story is what could happen when you find out that your spouse is cheating

I contacted Joe privately to let him know my thoughts on this story, but I want to publically acknowledge my appreciation for his efforts here to try to branch out to a larger demographic of the LW audience. A lot of us appreciate stories that highlight the potential consequences of our actions. Too many stories avoid mentioning any possible consequences at all. I think Joe "might" prefer pure fantasy stuff, where everyone is disease free, and everybody always has a good time. But even he has admitted that often perfection is overused in stories, and can become dull. Gritty truer-to-real life, when done well, can be very compelling- no matter HOW you personally view cheating or open relationships.

Thanks Joe for your efforts, looking forward to reading the next one.

Ok , first let congratulate you on stepping outside of your ( or what I think is ) your comfort zone . I know that's not easy for most of us , me most of all.

This is the second best posting of yours that I've read. " Getting even " was by far the most enjoyable story of yours to me. I've told you before that I think it has one of the most dramatic scenes of any that I've read in this genre.

Now this story , based on the " Miami Vice " song , as I call it , you make the husband out to be a crappy narcissistic person who put his profession above his family. To me that's certainly not a stretch . I'm pretty sure a vast amount of the " successful " people in the entertainment community that today's society puts up on these pedestals with people clamoring to them just because of their fame , does create a false sense of entitlement . And I'm sure that quite a few are insufferable assholes who have long since lost the "normal" sense of empathy .

But , also in todays fucked up society , the public loves to build them up , and then loves to sit back and watch them crash and burn ! From Lindsey Lohan and Britney Spears and their spiral downward with everyone watching Entertainment tonight , Access Hollywood , TMZ and every other of these POS shows. And I must say even I got into the Charlie Sheen meltdown , Porn Stars , Drugs and Booze , hell it was entertaining . Those are simply a very few of these examples , everyone can fill in a Actor , Musician , Athlete , Politician , ect.

So by using this protagonist , I for one really had no sympathy for him . His wife wasn't very likeable either. She could have put her foot down after the first couple of kids. It was very obvious where his priorities lay and unless she put an ultimatum to him , did she really think it would change ?

As for the drowning scene , I remember the urban legend about that particular song , but it wasn't true.

Anyone who would watch someone drown is simply a monster.

Thanks for sharing.

there's nothing erotic about this story and it certainly doesn't belong on a porn site. 1*

A very good story until @swingerjoe decided to murder it with the ending...Making it going from a solid 4* to a 1*...

A new voice for you! Thanks for writing!

Why is she upset that he sent pictures to the lover's wife? What would she expect?

Like she wouldn't have done the same?

Go eat you daily cum treat from wifey's pussy, you cuck moron.

swingerfag cuck shit.

This story was entertaining. At times humorous, other times sad. I gave it 4*s.

Very good use of talent swingerjoe. Dialogue was consistent with the character's thoughts and actions. Plot was very creative and I believe his actions after 6 years were consistent with the rest of the story.

We sure appreciate that you didn't break up the story into 3 one page chapters. As the continuity and emotional effect of your story would be badly affected📝✂.

This website has performed poorly in posting multiple chapter stories, lately.

Thanks again for the fun read👏.

AMerryman

So here we have a guy who abuses his wife, ignores his family, sucker punches someone and smiles as they drown and lies to police. Would he fuck a groupie? What do you need, a signed affidavit?

Not bad just feels incomplete. Something is missing. Kids view maybe?

First, you get 5* from me for your writing skill. As I have written elsewhere, I have taken a much harsher stance toward cheating spouses since the discovery that my first wife was cheating on me while I was deployed overseas. I won't shed any tears at all for the dead man: when you fuck around with someone else's wife, you take certain risks. In my view, the SOB got what he deserved!

What should have happened is this: if a spouse is unhappy - for whatever reason - they should try to talk things out with the other person in the marriage. If that doesn't work, then divorce them. After the divorce, they can be with whoever they want, and it's no one else's business. But there can never, ever, be an excuse for cheating. Not when we live in an era where you divorce someone (in many states) for no reason at all, and without the other person's consent! It's this simple, boys and girls! Leave, don't cheat!

Yes, if you're going to use his "philandering" as part of the reason to condemn/blame him you need more than suspicions and gossip rags!

Just like HE would have been out of line accusing her of cheating because he caught them in an "intimate moment".

Why do your stories always come off as poorly constructed morality plays? The characters feel forced, the situations seem contrived...

I felt like your courtroom scene was pretty good, and I liked the ending, but almost the entirety of Vanessa's story felt artificial and unlikely. The odd thing is that it seems to be a very common trope; hard-working father doesn't pay attention to wife, she gets overworked and feels unappreciated, she seeks comfort from someone else, everyone gets screwed, but the father gets the blame.

And let's not make any mistakes, you're blaming the Phil character for all of this. That's the other part that makes this story have problems; your writing gets smarmy, like you're trying to be vindictive to some of your readers rather than telling a story. That's pretty much what a morality play is; a lesson made to 'punish' the audience into recognizing their sins.

No one enjoys reading that, except smug asshole who think it doesn't apply to them but does to everyone else. Your attitude toward a portion of the people who read this genre is still evident in your writing, and it takes a toll on the story.

I will say this; I find your characters significantly better than the last story of yours that I read, so there's definite improvement showing.

It's interesting that you feel that Vanessa's story is artificial and unlikely when her story is very similar to the story told by Phil Collins' first wife. She really did feel neglected and alone. Their child really was born two weeks late, which delayed Genesis' tour -- for which Phil made her feel guilty. He really did leave shortly after the birth and refused to come home when their child ended up in the hospital for two weeks.

Just because something hasn't happened in your life experience doesn't mean it hasn't happened to anyone else. One of the purposes of fiction is to show how others live. Sometimes it seems the truth really is stranger than fiction.

Vanessa was hardly a flawless character in this story. If you're upset because I didn't portray Phil as a flawless hero as we see in so many other stories, I make no apology for that. I try not to write predictable stories with one-dimensional characters.

I thought the story was well done, and the winner is actually the big loser. I guess the big winner is the wife, all she lost was what she decided was a loveless marriage, but she is going to carry around a lot of guilt, she knows she set this drama on a course that couldn't be changed.

Phil lost his wife and his son.

I guess that the ending was one thing but you have to believe if the son was as obsessed as the story says then while he put the drum sticks down obsessed people don't stop, God knows he has enough material to write songs for the rest of his life, and an entrance into the business, probably the most important factor in show business.

5* good writing, enough to think about for a while.

You comment that when we have morality tales "No one enjoys reading that, except smug asshole who think it doesn't apply to them but does to everyone else."

I find it hard to think of a Loving Wives story that isn't a morality tale. Surely it all depends on which version of 'morality' the tale is promoting? The morality message in this story is that those who seek revenge may also suffer. Some liked that message, even if you didn't. Those who liked it wouldn't consider themselves to be "smug assholes".

A far more common morality theme in LW stories is that 'cheating' by a wife should be severely punished and the husband is justified in going to any extreme. These stories usually score much more highly than stories in which the wife 'gets away with it'. So some readers clearly do "enjoy reading that" version of morality. They wouldn't consider themselves to be "smug assholes" either.

To each his or her own version of morality in a morality tale, perhaps?

Lue

The smug asshole, in defense of the smug asshole, swingerjoe. Smug assholes have each other's backs, thus disproving the old adage, "no honor among smug assholes."

I thought this was a very well written story. It has been fun seeing this author improve his work over time. The level of vitriol that pervades the comments on anything he writes seldom has little to do with the quality of the story or the writing but seems to be simply personal attacks. i do not claim to understand that aspect of the LW stories but so be it. This is a good story. Thanks.