All Comments on 'Innocent Devil’s Harem Ch. 26'

Ended to soon. Dang. I need more! Ahhck! So good tho. The chapters are picking up, tho slower, but surer. A really good pace to make me crazy and thirsty for more. Dhajebanabna

I love this story but the dialogue seems to drag on with lots of repetition on top of each posting feeling like its own day yet being only a couple of hours.

If thats what youre going for then you do you, just wanted to leave my thoughts.

- Keeper

thank you

Too short again but certainly keeps you on your toes never knowing what's going to happen next.

Another great chapter 5 stars

I am loving this story, but we are on chapter 26 and I feel we are still seeing the scene setting in some way. It's not just that we're not seeing sex (and you've hinted we'll see a lot more.if that soon), it's just each chapter gives us a small step forward and then suddenly it's over. I appreciate that the writing takes time, but man I am always desperate for the next chapter. So you think you could release it all together once you are finished, or perhaps in larger chunks, which might help the story flow. Anyway it's a.give from me. Looking forward to 27 and 28 and. 29, 30, 31......

I really like this story and very much want to see where it goes but dude you are really killing if with the absolute snails pace you've set. I get wanting to build a scene and framework but as another poster said chapter 26 and were only like 3 or 4 days into your timeline. It's a bit ridiculous. I really hope it moves along quickly or I fear you risk losing readers.

I honestly do but wish you would do longer chapters it’s like one thing happens we talk and then end it’s frustrating wanting to know something maybe 5/6 page chapter double 2 of your chapters together maybe

I really like the storyline and characters that you have developed, but I think the pacing is way too slow. I know that it takes long to write these and I really do appreciate it, but each chapter is so short and moves the plot on by a few minutes at a time. We are already on chapter 26 yet its been less than a week in their lives. I would be ok with the pace if you released them more often or released the chapters with more pages. By the time I read the next chapter over a week later, I have almost become disinterested in the story.

I love the story line. Just wish the chapters were longer.

Excellent story but... I see a lot of complaints about the length of your chapters, I don't think it's so much a length problem as a stride problem. When you're running there are certain strides that just feel right and like you can go on forever. You break stride when you end a chapter. In this particular case I would have ended the chapter when they entered the car or when they arrived at the mom's, the beginning of a new action instead of in the middle of an action. Don't get me wrong it's only the chapter breaks as a novella it'd be perfect.

For all the "Moaners" out there, the chapters are kept that way for a reason, if you don't like it you can always look elseware, some of us actually like the suspense.

I love the storyline and writing style but - like others mentioned - by 26 chapers it is less than a week of action so it seames about too much thoughts all the time beside too less content. Kai know his demonic beeing at least since he is 8 or 9 jears old but never read any book about it? Even if he'd keep silent about it, so interest at any knownledge in mystics and saga about demonic historie? He'd never seem to think about easy ways of even basic information, so why did his cop sister Gabriella did not call her police coworkers for information about Avery's father? Why Kai did not call the cop to tell the warehouse location he found his sister in an obvious trap earlier? What happend to the recordings of the serial murder about him as a child killing the murder's helper first time? And nobody seemed to care? What about the big anabolic partner guy provoking Kai for identification in the shopping mall? Why did Kai not read anything about an catalyst on his phone while sitting / waiting in an hospital or making same stupid mistakes again like (ignoring blood hunger after transformation and) leaving his sister while transforming allone in the house with his (helpless) MILF+daughter couple? And - while his fiance read a lot of books about mystic and deamons - why did she not know or thought about the catalyst? AI love the storyline and writing style but - like others mentioned - by 26 chapers it is less than a week so it seames to get too much thoughts al the time beside too less content. Kai know his demonic beeing since he is 8 or 9 jears old but never read any book about it? Even if he'd keep silent about it, so interest at any knownledge in mystics and saga about demonic historie? He'd never seem to think about easy ways of even basic information, so why did his cop sister Gabriella did not call her police coworkers for information about Avery's father? Why Kai did not call the cop to tell the warehouse location he found his sister in an obvious trap earlier? What happend to the recordings of the serial murder about him as a child killing the murder's helper first time? And nobody seemed to care? What about the big provoking anabolic partner guy provoking Kai for identification in the mall? Why did Kai not read anything about an catalyst on his phone while sitting / waiting in an hospital or making same stupid mistakes again like (ignoring blood hunger after transformation and) leaving his sister while transforming allone in the house with his (helpless) MILF+daughter couple? All this things are setting more an image of an lightheadet stupid teenager but not about an over average aduld guy compared to other classmates. So Kai and Melinda having both more than 2 Million $ and wealth Melinda with experience in finance.. Going to get their own companies for home working? I would love to follow the story and find some twistet changes (as promised) but.. maybe a little less about doubleside thaughts and more about simple actions and planned steps for content. All beside my thaughts in this commend (as you can clearly see english is not my best language, sorry for that) - still 5 star rating because i love longer fantasy stories. For an literotica pulishing, also with fine details about hot stuff. ll this things are setting more an image of an lightheadet stupid teenager but not about an over average aduld guy compared to other classmates. So Kai and Melinda having both more than 2 Million $ and wealth Melinda with experience in finance.. Going to get their own companies for home working? I would love to follow the story and find some twistet changes (as promised) but.. maybe a little less about doubleside thaughts and more about simple actions and planned steps for content. All beside my thaughts in this commend (as you can clearly see english is not my best language, sorry for that) - still 5 star rating because i love longer fantasy stories. For an literotica pulishing, also with fine details about hot stuff.

You know I hate to say I told you so about the pacing way back when, but yeah I told you so dude. You're a great writer, you really are. But for the love of god PLEASE cut down the ifs, and maybes. Get to the point of the story and stop with the exposition. Gabriella has mention about talking to her mother about being a succubus for so many fucking chapters and only NOW do they get around to it.

We don't need a scene by scene monologue from Kai that takes up half a chapter about what ifs.

Just. Get. To. The. Fucking. Point. Of. The. Story.

26 chapters since you started this story way back in August of last year, and we still have not learned ANYTHING.

I've been following your work since you released chapter 5, and I'll continue reading as long as you are willing to post here. I've read some of the criticisms so far and just wanted to give my two cents on the topic. I don't think that the story needs to speed up in terms of sex, days in time, etc. I might have a minority opinion but I enjoy the plot, world building, and character development as much as the sexy bits. If people want to get off to something quick they should just watch porn. The amount of chapters is fine; people really shouldn't use chapters as a sense of how far into the future a story should progress. I sincerely doubt you'll lose readers from your pacing and the other points that the anon said aside from him. I do agree with Bardoc though in the sense of where a chapter might end. It could've ended in Kai's house, the car ride sleep, or Gabriella's mom's driveway. But I feel that the mom's driveway/first view of her would've worked as more of a cliffhanger than feel like an abrupt stop in my opinion. In respect to how fast you pump these out, I actually think that you're fine since I usually wait months for a single chapter from some and I'm fine with that. If people aren't content with waiting; you do have a patreon which is by month rather than by post if I remember correctly, which is nice.

Keep up the good work, and I hope to keep reading from you in the future.

- Kerberos

@KerberosProtocol You aren't the minority here. Your opinion is the majority.

That doesn't mean I ignore feedback (I actually made a big change to chapter 31 on my Patreon, more on that below).

But usually, those who are fine with something don't say anything at all, and those who have issues with something (anything) are more vocal about it.

That is NOT to say that I'm trying to invalidate those who are voicing their opinion. If you are reading this, and are someone who is frustrated by the pacing, that doesn't mean your opinion doesn't count.

However, this is just how I write, and most are okay with it. Not to mention, this story would be over so fast if I did it as some of the commenters were asking.

Plus, I have over 200 people following this story on my Patreon and they all love how it is progressing, and on Lit probably 80% or more of you guys are perfectly fine with how it's progressing. It's just that most of you guys won't say anything, because you're content/satisfied.

@KerberosProtocol Also, I agree that chapters are not a good measure of time. You can have an entire book be one day, or a thousand years instead.

Now, could I maybe do better on my chapter endings? Yeah, probably, but keep in mind this is a free publication for most of you. Which means, I'm not too worried about everything being perfect.

Anyway, this story is headed in some interesting and fun directions (questions will soon begin to start being answered), so I hope you guys continue to enjoy, and if you do want to read ahead, you can get up to 5 chapters ahead on my Patreon.

You guys actually have my patrons to thank, because I had a 'mini blow-up' on my Patreon a few days ago about something in chapter 31, which prompted two Polls, a ton of discussion, and me ultimate changing part of the story in chapter 31, as well as how a future aspect will move forward in the future.

So I do listen to feedback, but I am hesitant to make changes that the majority are okay with (or that might alienate the majority by making a change).

@Keeper_of_Secrets A big issue with the sense of pacing is the format of having it dispensed in chapter like this, separated across weeks. If you were reading this as a book in one sitting, then it might not feel the same, or as slow.

That's not to say that it is still slower pacing than what you prefer, but everyone has their own preferences.

Believe it or not, when I first started writing parts like this on a different site, each 'part' was only 1,500 words at most (compared to 5k to 10k for these chapters). At least I'm not writing chapters that short, right?

@Bardoc93 You make a good point about the stride, and honestly I think that's exactly what the problem is. For most who have an issue with the 'pacing' I suspect they wouldn't have an issue if this was an entire book that they could devour in one sitting.

Unfortunately, that is the downside of reading a story in this format, and also the conflict between 'writer time' (my own time constraints) versus 'reader desires.'

What takes you guys all of 2 minutes to read often takes me 10 to 20 hours to write.

And yeah, the ending of this particular chapter probably wasn't the best, but this is also a free publication for most of you guys, so getting things perfect isn't my biggest priority (though it is still important).

Excellent story, looking forward to reading new chapters.

So, I read fast. It's nice, but in situations like this, where the chapters are a bit short and the series is still in progress, I dislike reading so fast sometimes. Started reading last night, it's now mid-afternoon and I've caught up. Can't wait for the next chapter, keep up the great work!

I fall in the category of readers that don't say much either way unless it really knocks my socks off. It's your story, write it the way you want it. We can read it or not. I'll be reading it. Thank you

Very engaging story! Keep it going!

I was looking for this most days just missed it I guess but I'm glad I did I just binged it all and loved it thanks for writing it keep it up

Great series. Really enjoying your writing. Things are explained well and you use great detail. Looking forward to the next chapter

Needs to get laid!

I would actually prefer chapters 4 times as long, and have to wait 4 times longer.

Still enjoying the tale. Thanks for sharing.

Now lm intrigued

Holy crabcakes that was nuts now Her mom is going to flip.

The last comment here was about 3 months ago...and all that I read prior to that were positive. I especially liked, and appreciated, the one about this being "your story" ( the author's)...THAT is the kind of comment that I, as another reader (and commented) appreciate reading!

This is one of the very BEST series I have read here...and THAT is saying something, because I read a lot of these stories. I am also a science fiction aficionado, so this appeals to me on more than one level.

Thank you for this series...Five**5**Stars...deserves more, if you ask me!! 💫💫💫💫💫💞💞💞💞💞🌠🌠🌠🌠🌠⚡⚡⚡⚡⚡

I find the best stories, or at least the ones I enjoy the most, build tension and set the stage for the payoff. And while not necessary, I really like when there is a depth to the story's lore as well as well-defined characters. Sure, there are parts that, again, in my opinion, are rushed or leave me a bit confused but those are minor and few. Bottom line... I look forward to each new chapter with enthusiasm. 5/5*