All Comments on 'Island'

So does Miko go out with Nan, Liz or Ann for shore leave? It may have taken three days to finally get through the story but it was well worth the effort. Thank you.

Well crafted and enjoyable. You should definitely consider writing professionally. When you do I hope you will let us know somehow, so that we can patronize your works.

Jerry

Great writing ....look forward to hearing that you will be writing professionally.

My, a long read AND I just loved it.

Great story and well writen

This is one of the best stories I've ever read on this site. Absolutely wonderful!!! --Jim

I just invested hours of reading this story. I really enjoyed it, but, damnit, you need to finish it. Thats all I have to say, just finish the damn story. I could only give it a 4, because like I said, you need to finish the story.

I second my predecessor. I held on for 36 pages and felt cheated at the end. We know how it should end, we know how we want it to end, so give us the satisfaction on an ending.

Awesome read, please please finish it. You are a gifted writer.

After 35 pages of a magnificent story, you left me hanging. I second the request of my predecessors...please finish this story.

I was in Part 18, and feeling frustrated because I don't like the protagonist, so I jumped ahead to see how many parts there are. I get here and find folks grumbling about the ending or non-ending. From the way the file is structured, the probably isn't going to be any changes or additions.

<P>

So, Click my UserName above and let me know by Literotica mail, should I cut my losses and walk away or struggle on even though the people here don't think it has a suitable ending?

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<I>-- srgeek --</I>

Another great story from you. Unlike other readers, I will take the stand of liking the ending. One of the things I enjoy most about your writing, is that you make your readers think. You have a wonderful gift for starting a concept in one's mind as they are reading without coming flat out and saying it in words. This story has plenty of sub chapters for each character, if the reader cares to do more than have a story told to them. Great job - thank you for sharing it with us!

Man, I really hated this to end. I know I would have hated it to end where ever you would have ended it. The spot you ended it is fantastic, it let's the reader make their own ending.

But, not all good stories are happy ones. Alas, such is love, such is life.

that's why I'm reading a story. The ending seems abrupt and took me by surprise. Although a very good read, I felt there was a lot of fill in dialogue and descriptions really not essential to the story. I'd rather have the author finish a story then have me imagine one. So far I enjoy reading this authors works and given it the highest scores possible. Thanks.ML

Aunt Jean, Ron, and...

If you'd like to read it, click on my name and select the title from my “stories” page. I appreciate your readership!

A_Satori

how does it tie into the others?

What's puzzling in this story is how, for months, he was regularly firing live rounds into two unprotected targets and neither of them were getting 'wounded'... not to mention the magnum loads that exploded in Liz's firing chamber. Seems to me there should have been two and possibly three women with enlarging bellies to be rescued.

I agree with one of the other commenters who said that the story ended too abruptly. It certainly didn't need to end as it did. After presenting such a magnificent story, you slapped us in the puss with a crashing letdown.

One word... Masterpiece!

Bravo, A_Satori, for writing such a great and epic story. Bravissimo! You have a reader for life in me. ^__^

I agree that I was wondering why Ann and Nan did not get pregnant, but then he never was a father. The ending seemed highly appropiate!

This was really an incredible story! The characters were so real. The plot was interesting and believable. I'm definitely going to have to go back and reread it to see the subtle nuances. Thanks!

Creative and riveting story . Characters so real as to be 3 dimensional . My one critique is the relentless psychological self analysis of both Lisa and Joe. Then maybe it's just cause I'm a guy. I think you could easily have shortened that aspect without sacrificing anything. However, kudos on a great story, now don't muck up the end with a sad one. I don't want to have spent all this time reading it to be disappointed with the end. Real life is hard enough. We want to be entertained.

I was really looking forward to Joe and Lisa hooking up before being found, if only for a day or two. And their love for each other to grow and continue to grow. I sure hope this happens in your three story wrap-up. The same goes for Jean and Ron.

All 5 stars.

Kellyd

It was fantastic up until the end. All that build up and..... Nothing!??!?! I'll still give it a five, but I won't ever be re-reading again, cuz the ending basically makes the whole story pointless. Its like a build-up into an anti-climax.

After reading this story (and enjoying it until the ending), I glanced at Aunt Jean and Y, and then decided that I did not want to read either of them. What a disappointment!

It was such a wonderful story. I love how you have woven them all together.

I had read the first two in the series, but thought I could skip this one until Joe came into the story and I knew I had to go back to read this one. I was wanting to skip it because it was 35 pages and I was so anxious to find out what happened with the other characters.....! BUT this one was mesmerizing. A really good story!

The reader can supply whatever ending he may conjure up. Five Stars!

this has nothing to do with it at all!

btw it could have been 30 chapters shorter and not left anything out that had value or meaning to the story.

Gotta let joe and Lisa find their love, in the real world

A great long story, not just a one sheet! Not bothered about mills & boon either, just knew the last page was coming, still leaves it open for whatever?

Still love your writing and I do hope you write professionally. It was very long but nothing some good editing/cutting wouldn't solve without taking anything from the story. I also got a bit tired of the excessive self-analysis by your characters especially a man! This seem to be your trademark though cause you did this in your other stories I read too. I found myself wanting to skip ahead cause the over-thinking seem to go on and on and on. The ending was blah...a bit anti-climatic after all the build-up. But I have high hopes for the next story in this series. Your talent is in character development cause I really felt like I know your characters! Good work, keep writing. You are one of my favorite authors on this site! :-)

Finish their story and make it a goddamn happy one ya bastahd! Gaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh! WHY! Thou hast done me a mortal blow! Oh Avalon....aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!! Write the next one please, and I sweah to gawd if they don't stay togethuh.... *growls* Too well constructed a story to have an ending like this! Bah! Harrumph! Etc.

I would have liked it to move a bit faster, but that's probably my crass, immature television-influenced taste. I liked the diverse characters (you did a great job differentiating personalities throughout) and the sex was hot.

You misspelled "Zeiss" in the final page, but had amazingly few typos or grammatical errors, which I really, really appreciate.

Very well done, and I'm grateful for the read.

this was 2 stories, both written very well, one interesting, strong and gripping, the other trite, cliche, pathetic. The lost at sea story was obviously the strong one: good imagination, good plotting and pacing, held our interest.

The pathetic story was the sitcom plot with the stupid characters who someone never get to say the 3 words they need to tell the other. Problem is, if they said those words in the first minute, the episode would be over. Watch a soap opera and see how long the writers drag out stories with interrupted conversations and misunderstandings, and then they vitiate the throwaway climax with an immediate transition to yet another interminable mess of misunderstanding.

I get that he was drawn 'real', meaning imperfect rather than a heroic ideal. Oh, how realistic, I'm so impressed. I get that he was a wastoid burnout, I get that he had a big transition to go through. I get it. But, he never really went through any real transition, he never got re-inspired by beauty, art, his life's work, or even life itself. He merely rose to the level of a tongue-tied 14 year old boy who is too terrified and paralyzed to declare his love for his young lady.

Once their intimate time together was interrupted for the second or third time I realized how this story was going to end, but I just couldn't believe you would carry a drink through the desert only to spill it as you try to hand it to the one dying of thirst.

And what about Liz? That story was shaping up in a nice Lord of the Flies fashion, but then once Anne resisted her seduction, she just receded into the glum shadows.

I understand this is free writing, and more of a short story than a novel, but the boy/girl story at the heart of it was just so damned weak it poisoned the rest of the garden.

Great writing, great plotting and pacing, good characters up to a point, but such a crappy central story to waste all this effort on.

Start story...create situation...flush out cahacters...build tension...and while writing page 32/33 figure out vacations over, and you got to go...? No climax? Forget resolution...what a sin!

But it did convey the struggle of trying to survive on an island a tad too small for five people. However, an exception would be the wild pigs; they had to have been recent arrivals. Without other predators, they would have over run the island with pigs until they all starved, most likely destroying much of the ground-floor flora in their search for food -- possibly the adults taking to eating each other, as pigs are omnivores, or some combination of both events.

On reading the end, I flashed on the ending of the 2013 movie, "All is Lost." The ending here does stand on its own.

Some people didn't like the ending -- and there is a valid point to reading about 300 pages of story and not knowing how Joe and Lisa resolve, let alone Ann, Nan, or Liz. Still, this was a full-fledged novel. There should have been a denouement. 5* for the writing, but grudgingly so.

Not to be too picky but Passionfruit (Passiflora sp.) grows on a vine, not a tree and the fruits are egg-shaped, not round. Details like that show how much care a writer takes to make a story realistic which, like good sentence structure, grammar, and spelling, increases the readability of a work.

Why didn't you finish the story?????

Great story but your ending sucks you just left the readers hanging so I gave you a 1

Please add at least one more chapter

REALLY, this is how this story ends? The only critique I had was that it was too long in some parts. I was going to give this story an excellent rating, but now I feel so disappointed and pissed. I understand this is the author's story, that he/she writes what he/she wants, but the only word that comes to mind is IRRESPONSIBLE... IMO, with so many well-developed characters, the reader can't help but become emotionally invested in all of them. This was such an abrupt ending with so many loose ends. As a stand-alone story, this ending was a perfect example of a "SHIT" ending, IMO. At the beginning of the "Aunt Jean, Ron, and" story this author wrote, "Author's note: This piece is a multi-sequel to three previous stories: Aunt Jean, and, An Upside-down "Y", and, Island. I suggest at least the first two titles be read prior to this story." Let's see if the author does right by his readers in "Aunt Jean, Ron, and". I will come back and rate this Narrative with a caveat after reading the multi-sequel.

The way this story ends makes all the foregoing a waste of time

Ah yes, the classic "I got tired of writing this story, I'm ending it right here!" ending. Always a favorite.

TERRABLE ENDING........................................WORST ENDOING IVE READ.................LEFT EVERYTHING HANGING

ZEROZEROZEROZERO... 35 PAGES? I QUIT BEFORE I FINISHED PAGE ONE. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

No just no Joe and Lisa should have admitted their love at least fifteen pages ago. Then the rest of the story could have been them surviving together for years. While Joe was taking care of all of them like he has the whole time. Since its for years have Anna, Nan, and Lisa all be in love with Joe. Then when they are finally found there's kids too. But no we get this garbage ending. This author writes well but it takes a lot more than writing good to be a good storyteller and this failed. You would think after thirty five pages the ending would be good. I was going to give five stars if the ending was good. You get one for wasting my time.

Sorry, for me… too much wasted time.

I’ve enjoyed other stories of yours …. This one was just too wish-washy, back and forth, do I, don’t I…. Tedious…

Better luck next time… you are a good writer, have interesting storylines and sometimes…a good storyteller. This story, though, two outta three ain’t good.

Sayin’

Tob

Wow. Way, way, way too much indecisiveness between the guy and Lisa. What about when they get to the real world? What happened to the other people on the sailboat? This was a "meh" story at best.