by Extreme Bohunk
You just wrote my worse nightmare in story form! Excellent!
Excellent, and erotically creepy. But I was left wanting to know HOW she felt what she did and what happened to put her in that state. I think it would have been even better if Larry was somehow responsible.
This was one of the first stories I read on Literotica, and it's haunted me for weeks! If only all the stories here were as well-written and INTERESTING! Fantastic use of detail - I could see things perfectly in my mind's eye. I kept thinking she would 'wake up' when she orgasmed, and then Larry would really kill her... I'm glad it ended like it did, and that I found it again so now I can read it and your other work. Great job!
goodness. It had me holding my breath and wondering if she'd wake up and find this all a dream.
Great story, frightening and intriguing. I was on the edge of my seat all the way through it.
Great story and really intriguing. I was on edge the whole way through it.
I think the writing could use some polish, a final edit and some revisions for flow - punctuation and word usage. With a little polish this could be be truly frightening.
Well written, creepy and disturbing. This is an excellent tale that pushes the boundaries.
has been mentioned in today's New Story Review thread in the Author's Hangout.