Jasper's Education Ch. 01

She gave him an incredulous look. "You're fucking insane."

"Wrong again." He stood, pulling her up with him, and guided her into the bathroom.

In the shower, he washed her hair and body, ignoring her protests and knocking her hands away when she attempted to stop him. He dried her off, too, and then pulled some clothes out of his dresser and tossed them to her. "Put those on."

She looked down at them with a puzzled frown. "Why do you want me to wear your clothes?"

"Because I hate yours. I'm going to replace your wardrobe. In the meantime, it amuses me to see you in my things."

It was better than being naked. With a sigh, she pulled on the loose cotton pants. She had to tie the drawstring tightly to keep them from falling down, and they were far too long. The t-shirt fell to mid-thigh. She scowled when she saw the slight smirk on Jonah's face.

"I look ridiculous."

"You look adorable." He took her hand and led her downstairs.

When he led her into the office, she shot him a surprised look. "We're working?"

"It's Monday."

"I can't..." She stopped in the middle of the room, looking uncertain.

"You can't what?"

She stared at him. "I can't just sit here and work like everything's normal."

"I suggest you try, unless you want another spanking."

Her scowl deepened. "What the fuck is your plan here?"

He smiled. "To do whatever the fuck I want." He went to his desk and sat down.

After a long moment of hesitation, Jasper went to her desk and sank down into her chair. It felt surreal to be back in the office. But at least if he was working, he wasn't touching her. She reached for the mouse of her computer numbly.

"How are you coming on that memo I asked you for?" Jonah asked.

She drew a blank.

"California income tax," he prompted, one brow rising slightly.

"Oh." Her brain snapped back into action. "I'm almost done; there were just a couple of things I wanted to double check."

"Have it to me by lunch."

It was surprisingly easy to slip back into work mode. Maybe because it was a way to distract herself from the confusing mix of emotions she was feeling. Her knee was bouncing at a furious pace beneath the desk. The second he gave her an opening she was taking it. She had no idea where she'd go and the money in her bank account wouldn't last long, but she absolutely could not fucking stay here.

A sharp stab of disappointment startled her. She shoved it aside. It was just the vestiges of her crush on him. That needed to die a horrible death. She glanced at him. God damn him for being so fucking beautiful. A sudden, visceral memory of his tongue on her body made her shudder, muscles deep inside her clenching.

Fucking traitor, she thought at her body, scowling.

It's just mechanics, she tried to reassure herself. Biology. It didn't mean anything.

With an effort, she focused on her work.

Over at his desk, Jonah smiled.

It was shockingly easy to fall back into their regular routine. Jonah was terse and bossy, and other than his short commands, they were silent as they worked. The morning flew by. Jasper was startled when her alarm went off, reminding her it was time to make lunch.

She got to her feet without thinking.

"Where do you think you're going?" Jonah inquired mildly.

"To make lunch."

"Alone?"

For a moment, she blanked. Then she realized that if she went downstairs alone, she could make a break for the front door.

"Fine," she said tightly. "What do you want me to do, then?"

"Come here."

Stiffly, she walked over to his desk.

He studied her with cool eyes. "Come here."

Sighing, she moved around the desk to stand in front of him as he swiveled to face her.

He snapped and pointed. "Kneel."

"No," she spat automatically.

Jonah grabbed her arm and yanked. She fell to her knees, and he grabbed a handful of her hair to hold her in place.

God, he'd been wanting to grab these curls for what felt like eons. He gave them a good, hard wrench and watched her cringe.

"There will be consequences if you don't behave," he said in a cold, hard voice.

She glared at him with a mixture of anger and fear.

But her pupils had dilated. He'd fucking watched them.

"From now on, you're not to leave my sight. You will ask permission before leaving the room, and I will escort you wherever it is you need to go. Do you understand?"

Her lips pressed together.

Jonah gave her hair another hard yank.

"I understand," she gritted out.

"Good." He released her hair and got to his feet, then held out his hand.

Reluctantly, she put her hand in his and let him pull her to her feet. He kept hold of her, leading her downstairs and into the kitchen. Once there, he released her, leaning back against a counter and crossing his arms over his chest. He gave her an expectant look.

There was nothing for it but to cook. Jasper opened the fridge and began pulling out ingredients. She'd planned to make pasta today; she always planned out the week's meals ahead of time.

"What can I do to help?" Jonah asked after a minute or so.

She shrugged. "If you feel like it, you could dice that tomato."

He moved to the island, where she'd set out a cutting board and knife.

Just like they did upstairs, they worked in comfortable silence. Jonah watched her and asked the occasional question about what she was doing. As she was spooning the pasta onto plates, he asked, "Who taught you how to cook?"

"No one. I just started experimenting with recipes."

"So, your mother didn't cook?"

There was a brief pause. Her jaw clenched. "No."

"What was she like?"

"Why do you care?"

He stepped towards her and grabbed the back of her neck hard. Leaning in, he growled, "Watch your tone."

"Sorry," she said very quietly.

Jonah released her, a little surprised but pleased by the apology. "Answer my question."

Jasper sighed. "I don't know what she was like. She died when I was four."

"Oh." Jonah blinked. "I'm sorry."

His hand was back on her neck, but it was gentle this time, massaging at the tension he found there.

"It's fine," she said. "I barely remember her."

"What about your father?"

"I really don't want to talk about this."

"Too bad."

Jasper lifted their plates. "Where are we eating?"

"Let's go out on the back patio."

As they settled down at the table, Jonah said, "So. Your father."

Jasper sighed again. "Why do we have to do this?"

"Because I want to know more about my wife."

The word froze her, face creasing in confusion. "Your what?"

"My wife," he repeated calmly.

"What... I don't..." She couldn't even figure out how to frame the question.

"I contacted a friend this morning. The paperwork will be filed this afternoon."

"What paperwork?"

"The marriage license."

Shock spread across her features. "What?"

"In about an hour or so, you'll officially be Mrs. Jonah Parker. You will be taking my last name."

Her mouth literally dropped open. "That's not... that can't possibly be legal."

"The method isn't, but the end result will be."

"Not if I contest it!"

"Which you won't."

"Why the fuck would you do that?"

"Because I wanted to."

"But why?"

He sat back and studied her. "What do you think this is, Jasper?"

"I don't know! Fucking insane? It's absolutely fucking insane, Jonah."

Enunciating each word clearly, Jonah said, "I own you. What part of that do you not understand?"

"Every fucking part!"

"Lower your voice."

Abruptly, she snapped. White-hot rage flooded her, and she grabbed her plate and hurled it at the concrete. It shattered.

Jonah was out of his seat in an instant, his hand clamping down on her arm. He hauled her out of her chair and threw her face-down over the table. She started to push herself off, but his hand came down between her shoulder blades, pinning her in place. She heard the sound of a buckle being opened, and the rasp of a belt being pulled free.

"Jonah!" she cried in alarm, trying again to push herself up.

His hand didn't let her budge.

The first one wasn't too bad. But it was immediately followed by another, and another, and if she wasn't mistaken, he was hitting harder with every blow. Soon her ass was on fire. Each swipe of the belt became an explosion of crimson. Her nails scraped across the surface of the table.

"I'm sorry!" she cried. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"

Jonah stopped immediately. He waited a moment, as though testing her sincerity, before he removed his hand from her back and helped her stand.

She was shaking all over, tears streaking her face. She dropped into her chair with a wince, head hanging.

Jonah resumed his seat as well, and reached over to put his fingers beneath her chin. Tilting her face up until he could meet her eyes, he studied her. "You're stubborn."

She gave him a resentful look.

Tsking, Jonah pulled her from the chair again, this time onto her knees in front of him. She didn't try to fight him, but she grabbed his legs in alarm when he plunged his hand down the front of her pants.

Her face erupted in bright red as Jonah chuckled.

"You're very wet," he accused softly, fingers stroking her.

She shuddered, eyes closing.

"Seems I was right about you." Jonah withdrew his hand and gestured to her chair. She got shakily to her feet and sank down into it. "Now. Your father."

"He was an addict," she said dully. "After my mom died, anyway. When I was eight..." Her voice faltered, and to her surprise, Jonah reached over and took her hand, squeezing it gently. Licking her lips, she took a deep breath and said, "He left me. Parked the car in front of a CPS office and just walked away. They tried to find him and couldn't. Eventually, they terminated his rights."

"How long were you in foster care?" he asked quietly.

"Until I was seventeen. Technically, you don't age out until you're eighteen, but I graduated high school early and had a scholarship. The judge in charge of my case was happy to let me go."

Jonah pulled her from her chair again, but this time he gathered her up in his lap and just held her. She held very still as he ran a hand over her hair and down her back. The fingers of his other hand curved around the back of her neck as his thumb stroked her cheek. "I know that was hard for you. You did really well."

There was quiet pride in his voice. She wondered at it.

They just sat there for a while, and she slowly relaxed in his arms. It felt good, to be held. His heartbeat was strong and steady beneath her ear, his fingers gentle in her hair, and he smelled fantastic. Without thinking, she tipped her head back and nuzzled into his neck, inhaling a deep breath of him.

He made a pleased rumbling sound. "Careful," he cautioned. "You may start something you don't want to finish."

She tucked her head back down, blushing.

He chuckled and slapped her hip, but playfully. "Time to get back to work."

At least it was a distraction. She could bury her head in work and do her best to ignore Jonah.

Until she had to go to the bathroom. She stood up, and then almost as quickly sat back down, heat flooding her face.

"Problem?" Jonah asked, sounding amused.

"I, um... may I please go to the restroom?"

Jonah tossed down his pen and stood. "Let's go."

She was relieved that he at least stayed out in the hall, and let her close the door. Still, it was embarrassing to think he was right out there, knowing what she was doing and possibly even hearing it. She washed her hands and then just stood for a minute, drinking in the brief moment of privacy and solitude.

When she opened the door, Jonah was leaning against the opposite wall. For a moment, she froze, struck dumb by the sight of him. As though she'd forgotten in the space of just a few minutes how impossibly fucking gorgeous he was.

"What's that look for?" he asked.

She shook her head. "I have no idea how I'm supposed to feel, moment to moment."

"It doesn't matter how you're supposed to feel. It only matters how you do feel."

"I feel very confused."

"That's understandable."

She braced a hand against the door frame as though she was trying to draw strength from it. "Explain to me why you wanted us to be legally married."

"Like I said, I own you. I wanted it to be official."

"Marriage doesn't equal ownership."

"As far as I'm concerned, it does."

She studied him intently. "And is it permanent to you?"

"Yes," he said immediately. "I don't do anything on a whim, Jasper. I know myself. I want you."

"For now."

"Forever. I want to be the only man who ever touches you."

She frowned. "Is that why you did this? Because you wanted someone 'pure'?"

"No. I wanted you before I knew you were a virgin. I knew you were mine before I knew you were a virgin. But the thought of anyone else putting their hands on you drives me insane, so I'm very glad there was no one before me, and even more glad that there will never be anyone but me."

He pushed off the wall and held out his hand to her.

She took it. She'd had enough spankings for one day. "People are going to think you're crazy when they find out."

"No, they won't. They'll just think I'm a cliche."

"Or they'll think I'm pregnant," she quipped, and then came to a dead halt, eyes widening. "Oh god, Jonah. I'm not on birth control, and you didn't use a condom."

"You don't need birth control," he said, tugging her forward.

"Wait." Jasper planted her feet and tore her hand free.

Jonah turned to face her with a patient sigh.

"You want to fuck me, fine. You want to marry me on paper, that's fucking crazy, but fine. But you can't take back a kid, Jonah. That's for fucking life."

"This is for life, Jasper. Kids or no kids."

"I don't believe you."

"I know. But you will, eventually."

"I am not letting you fucking impregnate me, Jonah."

"I'm not asking for permission."

Her eyes widened. "You cannot be fucking serious! You fucking lunatic!"

"Calm down."

"Don't tell me to fucking calm down! In the last twenty-four hours I have been fucking raped, married against my will, and now you're telling me you want to get me pregnant? No, Jonah! I am not fucking doing this! I'll throw myself out a goddamn window if I have to!"

Jonah took her face in his hands. "Calm down," he said gently.

"Jonah." Tears shimmered in her eyes. "Please be reasonable. Please."

"I will take care of you," he said, still in that infuriatingly gentle tone. "I will always take care of you." He kissed her mouth.

"I don't want to be taken care of," she said in a trembling voice.

"I'm not concerned with what you want. I'm concerned with what you need."

He took her hand and resumed walking. Jasper stumbled along with him, feeling numb. The world was suddenly a completely different place.

After that, she couldn't concentrate on work. She sat staring into space, knee bouncing beneath her desk, until Jonah said, "Come here, sweetheart."

She glanced at him quickly. Debated with herself for a moment. Then rose and walked over to him.

"Kneel."

She sank to her knees in front of him.

Jonah ran his fingertips across her cheek. "It has been a very eventful twenty-four hours, hasn't it?"

She couldn't stop a small laugh. What an absurd statement. What an absurd situation.

"You look exhausted. I'll let you take a nap, but you have to sleep under my desk."

She glanced at his desk in surprise. It was a big one, but still, she'd have to sleep practically curled around his feet.

Like a fucking dog.

"Go on," he said, giving her a gentle nudge.

Jasper slowly moved under the desk, curling up on her side with her back against the wood. Jonah disappeared, then reappeared a moment later with a throw pillow in his hands. She took it from him and put it beneath her head. Then he pulled his chair back up to the desk, and went back to work.

At first, she was irritated, uncomfortable, and embarrassed. But the longer she lay there, listening to the soft classical music Jonah preferred to play when he was working, the oddest sense of peace slid over her. The smallness of the space felt comforting. Jonah's nearness felt comforting. She'd never felt so safe in her fucking life.

Her eyes drifted closed.

She woke sometime later and blinked lazily. It took several seconds for her to realize that her hand was curled around Jonah's ankle. She was literally clinging to him in her sleep.

She released him cautiously.

"You awake, sweetheart?"

"Yes."

"Come on out." Jonah pushed his chair back.

Jasper crept out from beneath the desk, looking a little lost.

"You seemed to sleep pretty hard," he remarked, studying her.

Jasper nodded slowly, disconcerted.

"Tell me how it felt. Sleeping under my desk."

She considered, rolling her shoulders uncomfortably. "It felt... safe."

Looking steadily into her eyes, Jonah said, "I want you to understand that I will always keep you safe, Jasper. Being with me means being safe."

A sharp pang ripped through her. She didn't know what it was to be safe. She hadn't even let herself acknowledge the longing for it in ages. "But not safe from you," she said softly.

"No," he agreed gently. "Never safe from me. But I think you already know that you want whatever I decide to dish out."

Jasper felt tears prick her eyes unexpectedly.

"What is it, sweetheart?" Jonah's voice was debilitatingly tender.

"I don't know," she said, shaking her head as tears began to slide down her cheeks.

"It's okay," he soothed. Leaning forward, he cupped her face in his hands and wiped her tears away with his thumbs. "Relax, sweetheart. It's okay to feel things." He pressed his lips to her forehead.

Her face began to crumple. "I shouldn't want this."

"Why not?"

"What you did was wrong."

"But you wanted it." His incredibly green eyes probed hers. "Is it still wrong if you wanted it?"

"It hurt..."

"You like pain."

A sob ripped out of her. She clenched her teeth against any more.

"Jasper," he crooned. "I know you. I'll never do more than you can take. But I will push you. There's so much you have to learn."

"Jonah," she whimpered, more lost and confused than she'd ever been in her life.

"Let me make this easy on you," he murmured. "I canceled your scholarship."

Everything in her froze.

"The only way you can go back to school in the fall, is if I pay your tuition. And I will. If you behave. If you do every single thing I tell you to with perfect obedience."

There was a long, profoundly heavy moment of silence.

"Do you understand?" he asked gently.

"Yes," she whispered.

He scooped her up into his lap and cradled her in his arms. She clung to him. She was exhausted and confused. Broken. And he was the only source of comfort that existed in her life.

Jonah carried her upstairs. He tucked her into bed and then climbed in next to her, wrapping her up in his arms. He murmured soothing words and ran his fingers through her hair. When he began to kiss her, she didn't resist. It was slow, and gentle, and grew more mutual the longer it went on. The intensity was muted -- less violent, really -- but it was still strong, vibrating beneath his skin, and obvious in the way he breathed, the way he had to keep reminding himself to relax his hands when he grabbed her so he wouldn't bruise.

He came with a low moan, and held her for long minutes as their breathing slowed and their sweat cooled.

Once she relaxed in his arms and he was sure she was asleep, he fully relaxed himself, and soon followed her.