Jezz and Edge Ch. 03

Jezz raised her eyebrows. "Good thing we had a chance to work this out."

Edge cut in then. "You should be silent now, apprentice," he said. "Adults are speaking."

Seraphina turned to Edge. "I think your student needs a bit of polish, Mister Edge."

"You are incorrect," said Edge.

"Oh, really?" said Seraphina, her voice dripping with irony.

"Yes, indeed," said Edge. "She is not in need of a bit of polish. She requires a great deal of polish. And more."

Seraphina almost smiled. "I see that."

"You see nothing," said Edge, "but be assured her abrasive nature is the least of her failings. I have tried to fill her with knowledge and wisdom, but even I am unable to make diamonds from mud."

"Sorry to hear that," said Seraphina. "Now, what you'll be doin-"

"And that is to say nothing of her failure to comprehend even the least of my teachings. And have you noticed her soft bottom? It is like teaching a beautiful concerto to the deaf."

"Right," said Seraphina. "Bad student. Got it. You want to be on the show or not?"

The reminder of the possibility of appearing on a talk show transformed Edge into instant peaches and cream. "Your wisdom, unlike that of my student, shines most brightly. You have obviously been trained well, as you are able to recognize greatness when it sits before you."

"I'm thrilled," said Seraphina dryly. "I believe you were recommended for the comparative philosophies episode showing in a couple days."

Jezz interjected before Edge could reply. "Yeah, that's right."

Seraphina gave Jezz an amused look. "Can't wait for you to meet the Meta. Maybe she'll have more of an impact on you than your teacher has managed."

Jezz nodded and tried to look contrite. "Perhaps. I am a rampant failure in many ways, but I do try to be an attentive student."

Seraphina rolled her eyes. "You're piling it on too thick, missy, but whatever. Give Celeste your names and contact information. We'll call you with the details."

"Cool," said Jezz.

Edge said, "Do you know the philosopher Kip Klinger?"

"Crazy Kip?" said Seraphina. "Yeah, we've met. Why?"

Edge brightened. "Perhaps he would like to participate in the show at that time as well."

"Yeah, sure," said Seraphina. "I'll give him a call and tell him to come on over to his competitor's show for a nice little sit chat. I bet he'll jump at the chance."

Edge beamed. "Excellent!" He turned to Jezz. "See, apprentice? This is what competence looks like."

Jezz rolled her eyes. "Yes, sensei."

*****

They left the office escorted by Neveah.

"Being here in the Meta's studio is such an incredible experience," said Jezz. "Wouldn't you agree, sensei?"

Edge beamed. "Indeed, apprentice. It is commendable that you are able to recognize the sanctity of such a temple."

"A compliment, sensei? What an amazing thing."

Edge nodded. "Sometimes you are able to retain wisdom. When you do, it always surprises me."

"I see," said Jezz dryly. "At any rate, wouldn't it be a cool thing to see even more of this, um, temple?"

"Indeed, apprentice," said Edge. "To experience more of such a shrine would be a fine thing indeed."

Jezz turned to their escort. "Did you hear that, Neveah? My sensei would like to see more of this sanctuary. Perhaps we could look around?"

The redhead was walking two steps in front of them. Without turning, she said, "Your enthusiasm is noted, but we do not allow visitors to wander the premises."

"Why?" said Jezz. "Do you fear that those less pure than yourselves will somehow desecrate the place or something?"

"No," said Neveah. "Insurance regulations."

"Oh," said Jezz. "Well, I need to use the bathroom."

Neveah said, "I'll recommend some places where you can stop when you go through the gate on the way out."

Edge reached up and lightly struck a cluster of nerves at the base of Neveah's neck. The redhead dropped without a sound.

"You talk too much, apprentice," said Edge. "Do what is required. I will remain here to observe this one."

"What if she wakes up?"

"Don't be insulting, apprentice."

"Sorry, sensei."

"Do not be sorry, Jezabel. Imperfection is its own disgrace. But should this one awake, I will tell her she passed out and you went to get help. But that will be required only if you continue to stand there yapping in a dog-like manner."

Jezz grinned, then turned and headed down a side hallway.

*****

After a few false turns, Jezz found herself in the studio.

There were a number of people moving about, shifting furniture and adjusting lights. There was a low buzz of activity and Jezz surmised they were preparing for the day's show. Not wanting to draw attention to herself, Jezz slipped out another door and continued down the hall until, after a turn, she found herself in front a door with a sign on it, stating, 'PRODUCTION CONTROL ROOM. AUTHORIZED PERSONNEL ONLY.'

Jezz started to reach for the doorknob, then stopped when she realized there was a digital number pad directly above it. Jezz turned away to find another entry when her sensitive hearing picked up the sound of the studio door closing. One quick glance around the corner confirmed Jezz's suspicion.

Seraphina was approaching, accompanied by Celeste and Jannah.

Jezz glanced around quickly, but that only confirmed what she already knew. Seraphina and her assistants hadn't seen Jezz yet, but they would soon. There was no place for Jezz to hide. They would have to pass directly by Jezz to get to the control room door.

Jezz stood with her back to the wall. She exhaled, then slowed her breathing to a near stop. She blanked her mind and watched through half-lidded eyes in complete detachment as she diminished the impact of her presence to nothing, blending herself into the environment.

Seconds later, Seraphina and her assistants turned the corner.

Seraphina appeared irritated. "Where the hell is Neveah? She should have come right back after seeing that brat and her teacher out the door."

Celeste checked her phone. "I'm not sure, ma'am. She hasn't answered my text yet."

Jezz watched, unaffected, making no more impact on her surroundings than the potted plant she stood near. Seraphina passed by her without stopping. Jannah's gaze passed over Jezz without recognition.

Seraphina stopped and tapped a quick pattern over the number pad. There was a click. The producer turned the knob and opened the door. She entered he production room, followed by Celeste and Jannah.

Jezz's eyes came back into focus and she moved to the door, catching it just before it clicked shut. She waited several seconds, giving Seraphina and her assistants time to move further away. Finally she eased open the door. Moments later she was inside the production room.

A bank of video monitors covered nearly an entire wall. Numerous control panels and video equipment faced the monitors, an ocean of technology. Different screens were flickering and the murmur of voices could be heard. This appeared to be the heart of the technical production of *The Meta Power Hour*.

Jezz remained in the back, keeping her presence dimmed enough so that she made no imprint on anyone in the room. It required her keeping herself detached, taking in visual and auditory data like a sponge, releasing nothing into the environment.

Several minutes passed. A door on the far side of the room opened. Seraphina and her assistants walked in, accompanied by a luminescent blonde.

They would have to pass close by Jezz to exit the room. Jezz pressed against the back wall and let her presence once again blend fully into her surroundings.

Seraphina's stiletto boots clicked the floor as she led the group toward the door. "Don't worry, Evangelina," she said. "Everything's set. You just do what you need to do and we'll take care of the rest."

The luminescent blonde appeared to be in her late twenties. She walked gracefully, her light blue dress swirling inoffensively as she followed Seraphina. Her lush golden locks hovered about her beatific features and her clear blue eyes were large and innocent. She wore a glittering tiara, an accessory that should have looked ridiculous in the setting- in any setting outside a prom dance, really- but it worked in this instance. A bright aura seemed to emanate from her, a glowing ambience that moved with her across the room.

"You comfort me, Seraphina," said Evangelina. "Your presence is a salve."

A part of Jezz's mind, a part buried deep behind the wall of detachment, noted that she would have rolled her eyes had she been an active part of her surroundings.

Seraphina strode past Jezz, her eyes crossing over Jezz without stopping. "Thank you, Evangelina. It's my job to help."

Celeste passed by Jezz, and then Jannah as well. Evangelina passed Jezz also, but then stopped and turned.

"Who is this," asked Evangelina, "and why is she trying so hard to not be noticed?"

Seraphina stopped and turned. "What are you talking about?"

The producer and her assistants stopped and turned. Their faces remained enquiring for a moment. Then they locked onto Jezz. Their eyes widened simultaneously.

"You!" said Celeste. The brown-haired assistant immediately dropped into a martial-arts fighting stance. Jannah darted toward Jezz, her hand flitting out to grab a wrist.

But not fast enough. Even as Jezz's eyes cleared, her forearm was moving faster than thought, sweeping away Jannah's reaching fingers.

Jannah's eyes registered momentary shock. Then she recovered and took an aggressive stance. Celeste moved closer, her eyes narrowed. The room tension spiked at the sudden possibility of physical violence.

"Knock it off!" said Seraphina, suddenly in the middle of the potential combatants. "Not in the presence of the Meta! Have you lost your fucking minds?"

There was complete silence for three heartbeats. Then Celeste dropped her stance, followed by Jannah. Jezz relaxed.

Seraphina gave Jezz a cutting stare. "Well?"

Jezz offered an innocent expression. "Well, what?"

The producer narrowed her eyes and her tight leather creaked as she shifted. Jezz intuited that Seraphina had just refrained from slapping her.

"Cute," said Seraphina. "What are you doing here?"

Jezz looked around. "I got separated from the tour group," she said. "I thought this was the souvenir shop."

Celeste stepped forward, but Seraphina held up a hand.

"You're not funny," said Seraphina. "You can tell me now or you can tell me in my office. You'll end up telling me one way or another. Telling me now will save you some grief. And while you're at it, maybe you'd like to tell me where Neveah is."

"I have no idea where Neveah got to," said Jezz. "She said something about Crazy Kip and her resume and then she was gone. I'm thinking disgruntled ex-employee."

"You're adorable," said Seraphina dryly. Her tone was casual, but her smile was a hard, dangerous thing. "Celeste, Jannah, take her to my office. We'll deal with her there."

And then Evangelina was there, her omnipresent glow radiating. She looked up into Jezz's eyes. "What is *muga*?"

Seraphina said, "Muga?"

"Yes," said the luminescent blonde. "She expressed muga when faced with danger. What is muga?"

Jezz raised a curious eyebrow. "I didn't say muga."

"No, you didn't," said Evangelina. "You expressed it."

Jezz was quiet for a moment before answering. "Muga is shorthand for an unconscious reaction based on unconscious assessment."

Evangelina smiled. "Explain, please."

Jezz shrugged. "It's an instinctive reaction based on multiple elements that you can't assess individually in the moment, but happens instantaneously in your mind. If somebody tries to punch you, you don't consciously attempt to gauge their speed, strength, angle of delivery, stance, potential follow-up or anything else. At the basic level, you instinctively lift your arm to block the blow. That's a form of muga. The more you develop your muga, though, the better that instantaneous computer is able to react. With the correct training, rather than simply blocking a punch, your body is performing more complicated maneuvers without conscious thought. Instead of simply preventing a punch, you are suddenly launching a counter that started with an aggressive move from your opponent, but ends with your opponent neutralized, all without your conscious participation."

Evangelina offered an angelic smile, then turned to Seraphina. "Please take her to the studio with us. I want her to be part of today's presentation."

Seraphina and Jezz both stared at Evangelina. "What?" they said in unison.

Evangelina lay hand on Jezz's cheek. "I find her fascinating," she said. "I want to speak with her."

Serbian shook her head. "Not a good idea," she said. "She hasn't been vetted yet."

Suddenly a digital song started playing. Everyone looked at each other.

Seraphina sighed. "That's me." She took out her cell phone and pressed a button, putting the phone on speaker. "Yeah."

"Hey, Seraphina, this is Dina from the studio. We have a problem."

"Well, fix it. I'm busy right now."

"We're trying to, but he won't leave."

"Who won't leave?"

"Some old guy. He's sitting in the guest seat and says he's supposed to be on the show with Evangelina."

Seraphina closed her eyes and rubbed her temples.

"Neveah is here," continued Dina, "but she won't help. She's acting really weird, though. She said something about a molten spank or something. And she keeps...well, she's acting really weird."

Seraphina shot Jezz a look full of daggers. "All right. Fine. Leave him alone. We'll be there in a few minutes. Get the other guests in place."

"Understood."

Seraphina turned off her phone and looked at the offending device. Then she looked up. "Well, let's go, people. Time to get ready. Anybody else want to be on the show? Speak up now. I'm sure we still have an inch or two of free stage space."

*****

"Good afternoon and welcome to The Meta Power Hour, filmed before a live audience in Chrystal Heights and brought to your living rooms direct from our studios. And now, here's Evangelina Morningdew, the Meta!"

A choir-of-angels soundtrack played as heavy applause sounded, lasting long beyond the traditional polite applause following an introduction. As the music and applause died down, Evangelina began speaking.

"Good afternoon, my friends," she said, her melodious voice striking the just the right chord. "Welcome to my show. There have been so many wonderful people striving to get my word out to the masses, but today I want to focus on a particular group that has truly risen to the challenge of spreading my message. Today I want to welcome a selection of YouTube streamers who've made it their mission to expose the world to my teachings. Please welcome Lars "Rockhead" Adams, Drake "Dr. Dark" Desmond and "Princess" Cyndi Sanders!"

Lars, seated next to Jezz, raised his hand. His dark hair was long and he wore a black concert t-shirt advertising the rock band The Spirals. The sleeves were cut off, revealing his wiry shoulders. On the other side of the man sat Princess Cyndi, a young woman dressed in a flighty arrangement of pink and yellow hues, a magic kingdom princess come to life. She stood and gracefully curtsied in the direction of Evangelina, then toward the audience. Next to her sat Dr. Dark, a black man with a shaved head wearing wraparound sunglasses. He showed no reaction to the introduction.

Evangelina continued. "And I'd also like to welcome a surprise guest as well. Two surprise guests, actually. Please welcome the great philosopher Mister Edge and his student Jezabel."

The audience clapped politely. Princess Cyndi curtsied in their direction and Lars offered Jezz a high-five, which Jezz ignored.

"We're expecting a fascinating show today," said Evangelina, her tiara glittering. A choir-of-angels resonance began sounding. "We'll be back after these messages."

The green camera light went red, indicating they were off the air.

The YouTube streamer named Lars turned to Jezz. "Hey, babe. My friends call me Rockhead. You're totally hawt, so you can call me Rockhead too. In fact, you can just call me."

Jezz looked at him with thinly-veiled distaste. "Sorry, I'm married, not hungry, gay, infected with 7 unknown diseases, pregnant with lizards and clinically dead."

"Aw, man," said Lars. "You could have just said 'no'. You didn't have to get all Warren Ellis on me and shit, ya know?"

Jezz stared at him. "Not bad."

The choir-of-angels soundtrack started playing and the camera light turned back on, preventing any reply.

Evangelina said, "Welcome back, friends, and let's get started. Tell me, Mr. Rockhead, what is it you do exactly to spread my message?"

"Hi, Evangelina, and man, it's, like, totally great to be on your show and stuff! I totally spread your message, 'cuz your message is, like, totally rad, y'know? I just do my part to-"

"So tell me, Drake," said Evangelina, cutting in, "what is it you do to help spread the word?"

Dr. Dark's sunglasses shifted slightly. When he spoke, his voice was a deep baritone.

"What I do," he said, "is add a little oomph to keep my viewers, shall we say, enraptured?"

There was silence. Then Evangelina said, "What do you mean?"

"Allow me," said Dr. Dark, "to give you a, shall we say, demonstration?"

The streamer reached inside his pocket and pulled out his cell phone. He pressed a couple buttons and passed his phone to Princess Cyndi.

As Cyndi watched the screen of Drake's phone, her eyes became glassy. The sounds emanating from the phone made it obvious she was watching an episode of The Meta Power Hour. Her eyes remained glazed as she continued watching the video. Then the choir-of-angels soundtrack sounded from the phone. Cyndi handed the phone to Drake and stood. Her hands moved to her buttons and she began removing her brightly-colored clothing, moving to the rhythm of unheard music. Soon she was barefoot and naked, hips rolling as she took the phone back from Drake and continued to watch the video.

Drake looked at Evangelina. "That's what I bring to, shall we say, the table?"

Evangelina watched the naked princess continue her oblivious dance. The Meta looked impressed. "Well, Dr. Dark, I must say you're a skilled communicator. Most impressive."

Dr. Dark actually smiled. "Thank you, Miss Morningdew. I am here to, shall we say, serve?"

Drake reached over and took his phone back from Cyndi. The streamer princess's eyes cleared and she glanced around, blinking. Then she squealed as she realized her state of nakedness, her arms crossing over her breasts and hips as she tried to cover her entire body simultaneously. Blushing from head to toe, she grabbed her clothes and dashed off-stage.

Just off-stage, Jezz could hear Seraphina's voice as she snapped at someone. "Get that guy a contract. I want it in my hands before the next commercial break. Move!"

Evangelina turned her luminous smile toward the camera. "Now, let's move on to Mister Edge. Mr. Edge, I'd like to thank you for appearing today."

Edge beamed for the camera. "You display a rare wisdom in requesting my presence."

Evangelina worked that through her head for a moment, then realized it was a compliment. "Thank you, Mr. Edge. You have been described to me as a wandering philosopher of sorts, an instructor of hidden secrets, a teacher. Would you describe your student Jezebel as a reflection of your instruction?"

Edge sighed. "Avert your gaze. You should not look upon shame."

Evangelina blinked. "I beg your pardon?"

"Her soft body much better serves as a vessel of pleasure than that of a hardened warrior."

Evangelina blinked again. "I see. But wouldn't you agree she has skills generally unseen in oth-"

"Her girl heat is most certainly a sun source. Few could best her in that arena."