Jezz and Edge Ch. 03

"Okay. But her skills-"

"Were you to strike her bulbous rear, the resultant ripples would destroy your furniture."

"But-"

"Still, my son is not a complete disappointment. At rare times she is able to somehow achieve success. These moments are surely a reflection of me as her teacher, as you in your wisdom have no doubt deduced."

"Your son? Is he here?"

Edge sighed. "Have you lost your sight? She sits before you."

"Your son?"

Jezz stared in amazement. To the casual observer, her eyes might have seemed wet.

Edge shook his head in exasperation. "I do not need to repeat myself, young lady. You would almost certainly find it easier to understand my words if you put less effort in your attempts to alter my thoughts."

There was momentary silence. Then Evangelina said, "Alter your thoughts? I would never-"

"I do not fault you for having ability, young woman. Only for being foolish enough to attempt to use it against me."

Seraphina's voice cut in from offstage. "Cut to a commercial. Now."

The camera light went red.

Seraphina stormed on-stage, followed by five burly security guys. The producer pointed at Edge at Jezz and jerked a thumb toward off-stage. "These two. Out. Right now."

Edge gazed at Seraphina with polite interest. "I will be most happy to exit this temple, once I have finished speaking with the Morningdew."

"No," said Seraphina. "You're leaving now."

Jezz got to her feet. "I don't think you brought enough men with you to make that happen."

Seraphina sighed. "You really are a pain, you know that? Gentlemen, drag the brat off-stage. Then come back and get the old guy."

One of the security guys reached for Jezz and then all hell broke loose.

Jezz grabbed the guard's extended wrist, spun and sent him sailing over her shoulder. He landed on his back with a thud that shook the stage.

The remaining four guards looked at each other, than back at Jezz. They charged.

Lars took out his phone and started videoing. "Hey, this is Rockhead, livestreaming directly from the stage of Evangelina Morningdew, the Meta herself, and I'm here to tell you this scene is *wild*! The old guy over here was talking and stuff, and then Evangelina was like 'what?' and the old guy was like 'what?' and then the producer ran out here with the Man and tried to take down the hawt chick and she was like 'no way', and now she's like totally giving it to the Man. Like, wow! Did you see the way she just kicked him in the stomach? Oh, man, she just totally bitch-slapped that other dude. Wow, a throat punch. Total ouch. That's gotta hurt, man.

"Now the security dudes are like totally pissed and taking out their batons. They're trying to hit her, but she just keeps ducking. Oh, now she's going *off* on them! This is freaking lit, man! Now she's-"

There was a sudden gasp. Even Rockhead went silent.

Then the deep baritone voice of Dr. Dark- who was also filming- boomed in the silent studio. "That was a, shall we say, very uncomfortable place to put the gentleman's baton. He's going to have a hard time walking that off."

Jezz had just finished beating the three security guards down when Celeste, Jannah and Neveah showed up. Celeste and Jannah dropped into confident, structured stances. Neveah's eyes were bloodshot and she was moving tenderly, but she too held a strict stance.

"Fine," said Jezz. "Let's do this."

The three assistants moved as one. They struck in unison, but staggered their points of contact. One would dart in just as another stepped back. Ducking from one blow meant risking a blow from another direction. Jezz blocked, twisted and re-directed. She would use one assistant as a momentary meat-shield against the other two, then dive and roll away. She spun, twirled and struck from unexpected angles, but she was starting to get tired. The assistants were very good individually, but together they moved as flawless parts of a whole.

Rockhead was dodging flying furniture and whirling assistants as he continued to livestream the brawl. "Holy cats! I am here to tell you that your live-streaming host has *never* seen anything like this! There is all kinds of crazy ninja shit going on! Now they've picked up the batons from the stage! The hawt chick has a baton in each hand and the hawt security chicks each have one. They're clacking like crazy! This is like total Bruce Lee stuff, man! Chuck Norris? No freaking way, man. It's *Chick* Norris! That's right, man! I went there!"

Celeste, Jannah and Neveah began a coordinated attack, batons whirling, moving in a grid-like fashion, forcing Jezz back step-by-step.

"Aw, man. Things are looking tough for hawt chick. She's backing up. The security chicks' batons are moving so fast, you can barely see 'em, but somehow hawt chick is blocking each one. She looks tired, though. How much can she take?

"Wait a minute...now the old guy is doing something. He just did something...took something away from Evangelina...her tiara! The old guy just took her tiara and now he's breaking it. Evangelina is screaming at him...wow...I had no idea Evangelina even knew that kind of language...it's a hostile scene all around...wait a minute...now hawt leather chick who's in charge looks pissed...she's not going after the old guy, though...she's going after Evangelina! It's another crazy chick brawl! It's a wrestlemania pay-per-view!

"I never thought I would say this, but your man-in-the-street Rockhead is actually lacking the words to describe this crazy scene! It makes the Jerry Springer show look like a cartoon! Oh, the humanity! Hawt karate chick is now beating the three hawt security chicks. It's like once Evangelina lost her tiara, they couldn't keep up with hawt chick anymore. And hawt leather chick is beating Evangelina silly! Someone should call security!"

Drake's deep baritone responded. "They are all, shall we say, indisposed?"

"Indisposed?" said Rockhead. "Oh, yeah. Hawt karate chick already knocked them out. Except for the guy who got the baton stuck in his-"

"*Indisposed*," said Drake.

"Indisposed," conceded Rockhead. "Moving on. Hawt chick is beating hawt security chicks pretty silly now. Meanwhile, hawt leather chick is beating Evangelina pretty solidly. Wait...Evangelina is trying to rip off hawt leather chick's top, but hawt leather chick just ripped off Evangelina's robes. Evangelina is...well, she's naked as a jaybird now. A hawt, blonde jaybird.

"On the other side of the stage, hawt chick has lost her baton, but disarmed all three hawt security chicks. They're going at it hammer-and-tongs, but hawt chick is moving like a tremendous machine out there! All three hawt security chicks are down now, but not out. They're stirring...moving...trying to get up...wait...hawt chick is pointing at the security guard with the baton stuck in his...the guard with the baton issue. All three hawt security chicks are staying down now.

"Meanwhile, on the other side of the stage, hawt leather chick has sat down in one of the chairs, catching her breath. The old guy is doing something with Evangelina. Helping her up or something. Wait...that's not what he's doing. He's...he's...ummm...he's..."

Dr. Dark said, "I believe he's, shall we say, inseminating Evangelina?"

*****

"Well," said Jezz. "That got crazy. I thought Seraphina was the bad guy, but she was being controlled as well. Hard to believe Evangelina stole Seraphina from Crazy Kip. Even crazier that the bad guy turned out to be Evangelina herself. Church says she has some light ability, but she figured out a way to amplify it with that tiara. She was building quite a following. Church is cleaning up the mess now."

"A mess indeed," said Edge. "They are fortunate you left anything standing after your blundering about."

"Church was happy to get his agents back," said Jezz. "Celeste, Jannah and Neveah are pretty embarrassed they got taken so easily, but Evangelina was pretty good. And sensitive. She even managed to spot me when I was dimming my presence."

Edge grunted.

"Oh, come on, Edge," said Jezz. "I didn't do that bad."

"I am ashamed to be known as your teacher. Even the screamers were more adequate than you."

Jezz blinked. "The what?"

"The screamers."

Jezz was quiet for a moment. Then she said, "Oh! You mean the YouTube streamers."

"An odd thing to call one who screams as much as Headrock."

"Rockhead."

"He is indeed."

"You should thank him, sensei. He made you a YouTube star when he filmed you impregnating Evangelina."

"It is your odd attempts at humor that makes you a hopeless student. Even I cannot make a diamond from mud."

"Is that any way to talk about your son, sensei?"

"You misunderstood me. I said your girl-heat was a sun-source. And it is."

Jezz grinned.

THE END

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