All Comments on 'Jo, A Very Special Love'

comma's and, unnecessary, apostophe'''s where they, should'nt have been not, to mention poor speling and, generally shit,ty writing.

Get a fucking editor. This story was stillborn.

Beautiful story! Glad to have found it. BRAVO!!!

It is painfully obvious that the author chose to forego the use of an editor. The numerous spelling and grammatical errors made reading this piece a chore. It is infested with superfluous commas. The storyline itself is thin and predictable, the characters one-dimensional, and the emotive content nonexistant. It reads like the work of a perverted third-grade dropout. I've read hundreds of submissions on this site, and can only think of a handful that were worse than this piece.

spoiled by lots of typos and suchlike

You developed a great story line. I thought it was one of the best pieces I've read. You need some serious help from a good editor.

I can't believe all you "critics" could find fault with her grammar, punctuation etc. while ignoring the beautifully-told and heartfelt story! You must be the clods that love the crudest categories; rotten slime-ball shit for whacked-out kids. Be constructive to anyone that can write a believable and erotic essay like this--grow up!!

taking the grammar issue off, it was a very good story.

but this is a strange world, some people only care for some minor grammar errors and not look at the story itself...

i'll still give this a 5, if i can... maybe even a 10.

Comments about grammar are relevant in developing your writing skills. They are intended as CONSTRUCTIVE criticism.

The gripe I have is "when I inserted a device for my period" - a DEVICE ! I assume you are referring to a tampon. to say device makes you sound like a very young teenager.

Could it be one of those vibrators with a wireless remote control? I would call that a dvice but it's definitely not for the very young teenagers. At least not for teenagers of Literotica. They have to be 18 to do anything, even reading erotic stories. Well, life doen't start at 18...

Reads like a fairy tale written by a young child. And then I check the author profile... Hmmm, that has me puzzled. Whatever way I read it, it's still more a Disney type of story line than erotica.

I love this story, the slow start was perfect. Better than the normal, hello fuck end stories xp