All Comments on 'John Saw It Coming'

You could really have this guy being a hero more often by them being in the wrong place again. Thrilling story. Well done

This is an excellent tale that is extremely well written. Congratulations!

Excellent story. Good hook, a great plot with twists and turns, characters well described, detailed backgrounds,

interesting and exciting, hard to stop reading for lunch, a great writing style, fun sex scene, and a powerful conclusion. I intent to are some of your other stories.

Very enjoyable story and was pleasure to read keep it up.

One of if not the best story on the site. Now to tackle the rest of your work.

Great story. Really loved the characters.

Outstanding! Great tale.🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟

A very good read.

Exciting story!

5

I would have given you more stars, if possible. I’ll be looking for your future postings.

This guy is so stupid, delusional, and self-pitying the FBI will have to look for him in the insurrectionist videos from the capitol...

I usually bitch and moan about most of the nonsense here (I’m old deal with it) but just occasionally I come across a gem or two, this is definitely one of them, well paced with excellent characterisation and of course a great fairy tale ending.

5 big shining stars for a fine example of how to write a wonderful story without sliding into the miasma of drivel that the majority of authors feel it necessary to inflict upon the world.

Your end of year report card will show you to be top of the class.

Very good read. Thanks.

Excellent story and very nicely written! Thank You for sharing this story!

A reasonably possible fairy tale to make us all look for more.

Great story, thanks for sharing.

But I hesitate to say excellent - but 5* nonetheless. Both 'heroes' could have done with more background & his life & history surely needed clarification? Very enjoyable. Now to read all your contributions. VBR

19pvc44

Outstanding story, got mad when I had to stop reading it just as it got really interesting... then got to finish it up later..... looking forward to more.....

A very enjoyable story, well done!

John's self-deprecation got a bit annoying, but I guess he was a damaged guy after his divorce and the time in the military. It would've been nice to flesh that out a bit before he slept with Angela, but the story worked okay without it.

Mostly good. You set the hook pretty well in the beginning, in my opinion. You were taking your time and doing a slow build........ then you switched gears, got away from details and started rushing through the 2nd half. I still enjoyed it but if the 2nd half would have been as much story telling as the 1st half, it would be even better.

Enjoyed the story.. My suggestion is to mark the scene transitions either visually or with words. You could use extra spaces or a horizontal line at the scene transitions. It is disorienting to shift scenes without warning.

I found the story concept very good but the ending was rather rushed. All in all 5 stars! Going to start reading more of your stories.

Enjoyed your piece, as I have others you wrote, but I felt you tired of the story before we did. Once you had it laid out you seemed to abandon it before you really got it done. Yes, it is the writer’s prerogative, after all, it is your work, but this could have been filled out more. REMINDER - we are still awaiting the conclusion of John & Carol, part three.

Nice mix of romance, action and good writing.

Loved this sweet story. Just a few minor things :-

1) need to seperate scenes so readers appreciate the change

2) felt as though the end was rushed a little as though you wanted it finished

3) more could have been made over his reluctance to get involved with Angela and their getting together could have taken a little longer with a few more meetings

4) more about his military service would have been appreciated.

However, 5 pages flew by, I was completely immersed and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Rates the max 5 from me.

I agreed Ravey19. Perhaps more detail on his military and love history. Definitely a 5 star rating for you. ,🌠🌟🌠🌟🌠🌟🌠🌟🌠🌟

A very, very good read!

Loved it. Good romance, good drama, good story.

Loved it.

One of the other comments stated that they felt parts were rushed and missing detail. I disagree. The story moved at a strong, determined pace. I didn't want any more details. I loved the way I was reminded of the introduction where the author tells us there's a little sex in it when the story hit the sex scene. Then I realized that the storyteller was a master and in complete control.

This is a great read.

THANKS

Now THAT's a story i teally liked. Great telling too. The plot was even quite credible, readers willing, except for internationally operating terrorist cells would jeopardize their operation and allocate assets for the sake of avenging a freak occurrence.. Six stars none the less

GOLD! A very nicely crafted love story. And if the story wasn't excellent enough, the careful editing was much appreciated. I hope your other stories are at least half as good.

Really enjoyed this story, only wish it had been longer as I would have loved to see more of their courtship, the new music, the touring, having kids, etc. Just really like the characters and concept.

Excellent, thanks

I couldn’t continue after reading that he was going to hide from international terrorists at his beach house. Too stupid.

As per earlier comments there are a few reality issues in there, but it’s a good story nonetheless, btw thank you for the epilogue, too few writers do that, especially in the romance section.

Thanks for writing and posting, cheers Ppfzz.

Who cares about reality details. This if fiction and a good story. If you need a documentary, go somewhere else. 5*

Good story.....love a modest hero.

Loved the story. Thanks!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Thank you. Good story that seemed to flow very well. Do some more story telling. Not just sex and violence. Even in the old west there was some quiet times. 5/5

Decent story. I felt like John went from reluctant to all in a bit too quickly. Maybe it was to keep the story from being over long, but it felt a bit rushed to me.

A solid 5 stars.

Excellent story. I loved how, unlike others, didn't finish it off too quickly.

Looking forward to reading more of your work.

Good story. Not a cookie cutter one.

I agree with anon who felt John's change of heart and mind was a bit sudden. Particularly with your ability to portray the inner thoughts and feelings of your characters, I felt this bit was under developed.

It didn't seem like he was having any inner conflict, and that his attempts to keep her away were genuinely based on a "different life style thing" and that he did not want a girlfriend. Then suddenly, bam, wham, thankyou Ma'am, he is in love with her.

Excellent story and a fun read.

The story was great. The dialogue at times felt stilted and I found myself wondering if they'd say that. The romance was quick, but I understand the necessity to move the story along. The idea was exceptional and the pace was good. Some characters could have used more exposition. Overall great story, KUDOS!

Different from some of my normal reading, but great story and fun characters. Bob's the best kind of guy to handle the fairy-tale world of a pop star. And Angela is a force of nature, in my mind. Great characters.

Enjoyed it immensely. I t was a great read. Thanks.

Good story plus. storyline could stand a follow up, give it some thought...

[08.02.24]

Top Shelf!

11/10!!!!!

this is a great story 5 stars totally enjoyed it

Just John's first story was 22 years ago and his last 3 years ago - this story.

I hope he continues to write.

Plot +

Character development +

Writing quality plus +

But this story is a 5+ because it brings mystery and adventure to heighten a great Romance story.

A disappoint 50 comments in 3 years. Obviously a lot of folks missed this one.

Don't lose out!

Pull up this highly recommended read now and enjoy it

The Hoary Cleric