All Comments on 'Joni'

My 2 cents

I liked the story and the characters. If I may make a suggestion, you said they are in love. But you did not write much of them in love other than them saying it. I really didn't see much passion and the small things that people in love do. The coupling went too fast. You don't have to drag it out, but if they are in love I should be able to feel it. That is my 2 cents. I look forward to reading more. Thanks for your time and your imagination.

Good start if rather rushed. It needed a longer more intense build up.

Tremendous beginning for these two. Stormy circumstances forced them to mature with one another and their time has come.

I think your massage to sex was well structured and passionate love making will come in THEIR bed.

Well done, looking for the sequels.

So many kids are abused.

This has a good ending

babies happen when two people have unprotected sex, especially the first time. they definitely should.

One day a woman will learn how to have sex without issuing a constant stream of instructions. There are two people there; it isn't just about her.