by Dracona
A great story, with believable red hot sex. Sporting major wood at work over this one!
romantic, sexy, carring, erotic, mind numbing and what more can I say.
Very Well Done.
This was a really fine piece of erotica. You had good characters, a good build up, GREAT sex . . . pretty much the holy trinity of erotica. :)
The fact that there seemed to be a paragraph or two repeated was a little distracting, but not enough to detract from the quality of the story.
Characters with depth that made me care about them, a story line that made the two friends eventually getting together feel inevitable rather than forced, and some lovely little touches (buying the earrings, for example) that provided a very human quality to the characters. The eroticism of the sex scene was matched by its warmth and gentleness. It was a joy reading how best friends could become lovers. If only real life were like that.
I really enjoyed the great depth of character and interaction in your story. The was a great touch of emotion which makes it very good even though the plot was a little less than original.
Thanks and keep writing.
My thanks to everyone who left comments on my story, I appreciate you taking the time. Yes, there is one missing. I took advantage of the delete button and removed one that was not so much a comment on the story but an attack on my personal ethics....I would have left it if they'd had the balls to sign their name.
Evil Alpaca, thanks for pointing out the formatting glich at the end. Maybe the powers that be can tweak it a little and fix that. If not it's no big deal, at least it didn't happen right in the middle of the hot and heavy :)
I'm thinking that, yeah, there's some unfinished business between Jen and Liz.....watch this space.....
Very hot and steamy. I love your dialogue and your character's narrative. Good build up of emotions until the release!
Glad to see the typing glitch was fixed by the powers that be. You are a very talented writer. Your stories are inspiring and superbly created. Characters are realistic and convincing. Brilliant work and a real turn on!!
This definitely deserves to be at the very top of the ratings list!
Beautifully done - from conception to execution!
From the nuts and bolts of writing, to the story, the characters, the dialogue, originality in perspective and everything inbetween...it's about as near perfection as anything I have had the pleasure of reading at LitErotica!
For anyone who enjoys lesbian erotica, this story is a must read!
Anyone who feels dubious about my comments, please read the story again. The more times you read it, with the intent of finding some flaw, the more you will end up appreciating the thoughtfulness that went into it's writing.
BRAVO, Dracona!
How one story can be only two lit pages, and contain so much beauty is beyond me. Superb writing, superb story, superb teasing both mentally (intentionally and unintentionally) and bodily, and more than superb style.
Now I need to go thank the person that told me about this treasure of a story.
mimused
P.S. The double paragraphs disappear if one goes back and then forward to the next page again. A pain, and distracting, but not from this story.
It's not just good erotica, it's a damn good story. Thanks for it, it deserves printed pages instead of a website.
Thank you. I am in awe of your skills and eroticism. Now I will have to go and read your other stories. Another evening of hot, solo sex. Wish my roommate was home.
Susan
I absolutely loved this story. You captured their emotions wonderfully and I could picture this happening with myself and a great friend of mine.
Amy
That was a beautiful love story. Thank you. Please continue writing.
I think it was the nicest story i have read. In fact it was the very best
fantastic story. thank you for having normal-sized women in your story!
The romance was well-played and the characters were well-developed and sexy. Your prose is easy to read and flows well. Thank you!
this is what i am looking for; simple, romantic, friends, love, passion, erotic, and chemistry. Personally, sex without love is not so erotic. The love definitely spices up the tension and the excitement.
Brilliant. I have never commented before but I thought this story was wonderful. Thank you so much.
That was f'ing hot!! Not a very lady like thing to say, but OH MY GOD!!
wow that was wonderfull thank you xoxoxoxoxoxoxooxox......more on these two please .
great story. I just loved the way u make ur characters so real n likeable. I just joined lit and urs was 1 of the first stories I read on here. Nice Job!
This was so erotic, so passionate. Great writing, great story. This is my new favorite! <3
1/2011 - The descriptive writing has to be among the very best. the "characters" portrade almost seem almost real. What more can I say ? Looking foward to even more of your writing - Thank you.
I love the real feeling that's been injected to the characters. This is no mindless fuck and was a great read!
forget her, what did you do to me? sheer, brilliance the characters seemed so real, the sex wasn't sleazy, one of the best reads ever
I agree with HLD. The prose just flows. Your characters work well together. Great job!
Oh that was just lovely! Superbly written, soft, sexy and oh so hot!
I have absolutely no complaints about this (other than I wish it didn't end). I love the whole falling in love with your best friend thing. I can so relate to that. ~ L
that was a brilliant story , can relate to that soo much , i had 4yrs of that same thing . though my story didnt end in happiness.. great story .. more more
This was very well done. I love stories about people finding fulfillment, especially when it's with a best friend.
Beutifully constructed,well thought out,bloody good especially on the second reading,will read this again & again
Like no joke tha beginning part of that is happining w me n my bestfriend sept she is helpibg me to make someone else jelouce but she will like kiss me n still hold on to me ecen just us sittin in her room n says she does it cuz if we act like we r dateing 24/7 than we will do those things naturaly
8~) 8~) 8~) I'm a 50+ straight guy; but I saw that one coming and understand why DKP
Brilliant, passionate and so erotic. The characters and dialogue well paced
"Friends can be lovers" This story reminds me of this song.....
** TOTALLY HOT ** LOVED IT!
I only wished that there was more to the story, but then in my mind, they lived happily ever after.... hopefully in Portland.
Loved the line about 'the curse of the drunk philosopher phase'---I think we've all been there and done that and some of us even got the t-shirt. If this had been a play, Dracona, then the audience would have been shouting in praise for you. I've often found that the fewer pages in a story on this site, the poorer the story. Not this one! In two pages, you've created a marvellous story with a nice, slow build-up. The plot is totally believable and Jen and Liz are totally believable (and loveable) characters. More power to your pen (computer?).
"We were drunk, my best friend Liz and I. No, we were beyond drunk. We were completely shit-faced, to use the vernacular."
And the rest is sexual assault not experimenting an assault. Feel bad for all the young women who get tricked into lesbian sex under the influence of alcohol.
Addressing the comments about sexual assault- The commenter clearly did not read beyond the opening paragraph. No drunken sexual assaults took place anywhere within this story. At all. All sex was sober and consensual.