Just Old Friends

"Mike, I made a mistake and I need to fix it. Please, Mike?"

"Charlene, I think we are pretty much past fixing the mistakes that YOU made. I'm working on fixing my own mistakes and one of them won't be meeting with you again. Have a great life Charlene."

With that I hung up and ended the call. I didn't make it to my fridge for a beer before she called back. After 17 years of loving, living and understanding this woman, I knew I needed to take the call if I was ever going to have any peace that evening.

"Charlene, what part of my reply to you did you not understand?"

"Mike, we have been together for too long not to try to sit down and have a conversation." She replied as if she had been practicing.

"Charlene, we haven't been together for over four months now. We are NOT together. That's not hard to grasp is it? Why don't you have this discussion with 'Swingin' Dickey and see if y'all can come together on mutual terms as to how you get it tonight, porked from behind or face to face? You are still fucking him, aren't you?"

She didn't say anything for a bit and I just hung on the line listening to the shrill silence. She had to know fucking that dipshit was a deal breaker from the get go. A one-time fling might have been something I could have gotten over, with a bit of retribution maybe, but offering up

her pussy on a regular basis shut the door on our marriage.

"No, Mike, I'm not. I broke off things with him a couple weeks ago. I need to talk with you, Mike. Please?" She was begging now.

I've never been accused of the best judgment in all situations and this was one of them. I agreed to meet her at the diner the next day for lunch and she was buying.

Before I could leave for the diner, Colleen pulled into the shop and I immediately realized I had fucked up. Colleen and I always ate lunch every Thursday at the diner before she had to pick up Christine and run her to the Community College. The High School had a handful of kids trying to earn some college credits early and Christine was one of them.

"Ready, Mike?" She asked me while skipping into the shop.

"Jesus, Colleen, I went and told Charlene I would meet her for lunch today. I completely forgot all about our regular lunch. Jesus, I'm sorry."

She didn't miss a beat.

"That's OK, I'll go with you. I'm still hungry and I still haven't met the bitch that called me a whore."

Against my better judgment I kept thinking this might be entertaining so I grabbed her arm and we headed for my truck.

"Nope, let's go in the Camaro."

So we did and she pulled up and parked right in front of where we usually sat next to the window. When we walked in, Charlene was already seated at another table. Colleen just kept on walking toward our booth tugging on my arm the whole way. I glanced over at Charlene and saw the consternation on her face as I waved her over.

"Hello Charlene, you are looking good today." I said as she slipped in across from us. She did look good too. She had pulled out all the stops making sure her firm apple sized boobs were right on display. Colleen didn't miss any of it. She saw me looking and saw Charlene showing so she upped the ante. She leaned into me for just a bit of privacy and pulling her top out away from her breasts, lifted one of them out of her bra and hefted it for me with a sly smile on her lips.

"Mine are a bit bigger, don't you think, Mike?"

They are and all three of us knew it at that point. Charlene sat there with her mouth gaping open until she spoke.

"Who is this bitch?" she asked softly, almost whispering. Collen was quick.

"That is Whore to you, Whore Colleen Whitmore and it is my pleasure to finally meet you. Mike has told me so much about you that I feel like I already know you. You are into real estate, aren't you or is real estate into you?" she snickered.

"Ladies, let's make it real OK?" I glanced at Colleen and back to Charlene although Charlene hadn't done anything other than sit down. At that point the waitress came by to get our drink order and see what we wanted to eat. All of us had been here many times and Sheryl knew our habits?

"Regulars all around? She asked. All of us nodded in reply while staring at each other.

"Mike, how are we going to be able to talk with her sitting there like that?

Colleen had positioned herself close to my side and I have to admit I was having trouble concentrating. All I could think of was that bare tit and the growing hard-on in my pants.

"Charlene, Colleen and I have lunch right here every Thursday and I forgot about that when I agreed to meet with you, honest. So, if you want to talk, this is how it will have to be."

The waitress brought our drinks back and as Charlene began to speak, Colleen started cracking open peanuts and grinning from ear to ear.

"Mike, OK, then this will have to do" She cast an evil eye toward Collen who just popped a couple in her mouth.

"I stopped the divorce papers so we can go back to where we were. I ended that stupid thing with Dickey because I knew how idiotic I was being."

She hadn't told me anything I didn't already know except for revealing how stupid she was if she thought stopping the divorce was a ticket back into my home and life.

"Mike, I know I fucked up really bad but we had a good thing between us. How can we get that back? I'll do anything you want, anything." She was near tears trying to get that out.

I didn't get a chance to reply before Colleen interjected.

"Ms. Johnson ..." She started

"That is Mrs. Mike Donaldson to you." Charlene interrupted. Colleen continued.

"OK, Mrs. Donaldson. Didn't you start fucking Dickey Johnson a couple months before you screwed over Mike and left him? Of course you did. You were fucking around before you ever thought of getting a divorce. Why should Mike ever let a cheating skank like you back into his life?"

If looks could kill, Colleen would have been lying wasted in a bloody heap on the floor at our feet.

"Mike, Please, I can't talk with her here."

"Charlene, it's that or no talking at all." I replied. "Also, about fucking that piece of shit Dickey, how long did you think it would take before I found out the truth?"

"Mike, I told you I was stupid. I wasn't thinking about you finding out. Heck, I wanted you to find out. It was Dickey who told me about you fucking this whore, here. Look at her!! You were with her long before I listened to Dickey. That's why she is here now."

Colleen interrupted again.

"You are one stupid twat. It was Dickey Johnson of Johnson Realty who showed you that picture of my hugging Mike, wasn't it? Of course it was. That's the same dickwad who has been trying for two years to buy my Mom's place for a song and a dance and the same shithead who has been pestering me to do the same thing up until about four months ago when I told him to completely fuck off."

She was on a roll so I didn't interrupt her.

"Mike and I went to school with the prick years ago and he knows Mike has been my oldest friend since I was just a little girl. So, his picture taking and lying to you was just his petty way of trying to get even with me. Hurt my friend, hurt me. Aside from that, he thought Mike and I were an item around town. What would we need with two houses? Mike's is a whole lot nicer and I could sell Mom's place. Now, I'm not saying your peckerwood friend had any real smarts but that's how he thinks. But, first, he had to get you away from him so he could be with me. There enters the stupid twat named Charlene.

Show you a few stupid pictures, every one of them innocent, and you peeled the panties right off your cute little ass and threw your marriage right out the god damn window. Plus, you know what is even more fucked up?? Do you??"

Charlene just stared at her.

"What was really fucked up is that me and Mike were never an romantic item. Hell, a few minutes ago was the first time he had ever seen my tit! Let me ask you this, you dumb cow. How many times do you think you fucked that cheesy fuckface, Dickey?"

I think both Charlene and I were speechless until Colleen goaded her one more time.

"Seriously, how many times? You were together at least six months right up until a couple weeks ago, you said. Let's see. The average whore dog cheating skank couple fucks 3.7 times per week. So 26 weeks, that's 96.2, oh Hell, let's round that up to 93. I think Mike should get some really good loving from someone who really loves him so he can appreciate being really loved before he ever entertains your offer to grant him with your presence."

She sighed and sat back, taking a sip of her sweet tea. I didn't really know what to say but I had to say something.

"What did Dickey Johnson want with your Mom's place?"

Charlene answered for her before thinking.

"He wanted to acquire the land before Phoenix announced the office park plans next door. Dickey has a brother who works for them. He already has 2 of the 4 needed"

I looked at her.

"Wait a minute. You did the appraisals for him, didn't you Charlene? So you knew about all of this and now that he's fucking dumped you, you want back into what you threw away? "

"No, Mike, it's not like that. I made a mistake." She replied.

"Of course you did. You made a big mistake when you first fucked him and then you compounded it by continuing to fuck him and then you administered the coup de grace by leaving me and serving me with papers. Here is what I say to your offer. Fuck that."

With that I got up, offered Colleen my hand and the two of us walked out. I told Sheryl the waitress that it was all on Charlene.

"Mike, please don't be mad at me. I knew I had to shut that conniving bitch down and the only way to do it is with the truth." Colleen looked at me with a tear in her eye.

"Colleen, did you know what Dickey was up to?" I asked.

"Of course I did although I didn't think he was going to fuck up your marriage as payback."

I looked at her and I could see something else and she knew it so she continued.

"When you told me she had a picture of the two of us together I needed to find out more about what was going on. That was just petty vindictiveness but just the same, something had to make him fruity enough to do it so I started asking around and I found out that the Collins' and Bobby Jones Mom had already sold to Dickey. Shortly afterwards, somebody from Phoenix Financials came around inquiring of their properties. Let's just say a friend of a friend helped me out with some information and I could figure out how to put two and two together.

Besides, I remembered seeing Dickey Johnson parked across the street at the CVS that afternoon when I gave you that hug."

She looked up at me and I gave her another one of those hugs.

"Colleen, I could never be mad at you for ever having my interests at heart. Besides, I quite enjoyed the cat fight." I grinned big time at her. "Not to mention the tit. Are you dancing at the Town Line Gentlemen's Club tonight?"

She punched me lightly on the arm and added.

"I only do private dances and, hey, in addition to all that, Phoenix isn't going to build the office park there anyway. How's that for fucking Dickey in the ass?"

With that, she fired up the Camaro and got a wheel as we headed down the street. The girl could drive.

Charlene tried calling me half a dozen times later that night but I didn't take her calls. All I could think about was Colleen and not in any good platonic friend kind of way. I hadn't been laid in over 4 months and I was past due. Unfortunately, with all the cat fighting at the diner that day, it was never mentioned that Colleen was in a dating relationship with a guy. I considered it serious between them since they had been going out for a couple months now.

So, with women in mind and being new to the dating scene after a nearly 19 year absence, I fixed myself up, slipped on a pair Tony Lama boots and splashed on a little Bay Rum. The Running Dog Saloon was real big with the crowd stuck between young pups and old foggies so that's where I headed.

It must have been my lucky evening because it was Ladies Night and it was packed. They had a dusty old honky tonk band playing on the small stage but they were suitable for dancing and within several minutes I was on the floor with an athletic lady a few years older than I but in a hell of a lot better shape. I wasn't fat or terribly out of shape but she put me to shame. She looked real good doing it too.

Her name was Sandy and after a few hours of shaking that rug and several shots of Jose Cuervo, we ended up back at my house shaking the bed frame instead and she was good, real good. I don't have a giant horse cock or anything but way back when I was dating, I was told on more than a couple occasions that the package was way sufficient for anybody's needs or desires. Sandy was no exception. She was nearly insatiable and took it in damn near every orifice. Charlene never let me get her ass but Sandy had an orgasm just thinking about it.

I drove her back to the Saloon to get her car in the morning and we made plans to hook up again next week. Her sales job kept her out of the fun circuit until midweek every week but since we were just new to it, it was OK with me. We did the hookup thing like that for a couple of months and I continued with my Thursday lunches with Colleen. Charlene still had not filed the papers for the divorce and she kept trying to reach me damn near every day. She had become a nuisance.

One evening at the Running Dog, I was nursing a long neck waiting for Sandy to show up and Charlene walked into the joint with some tall goober looking fellow I had never seen before. He was probably ten years or so older than me and not even close physically. I had him by at least 30 lbs. Charlene nodded toward me but I just turned away on my stool.

The next thing I knew I was being sucker punched right out of the stool and onto the floor. Charlene started getting hysterical.

"You weren't supposed to fucking hit him, you ignoramus!" She wailed at the man while flailing away with her small fists.

The bouncer had already grabbed hold of the guy and I was up on my feet ready to coldcock the bastard with a left hook but my head was spinning from the cheap shot. He started talking.

"The next time you fuck some man's wife, maybe he'll shoot your fucking ass, you piece of shit! You touch Sandy again and I'll cut your fucking balls off."

By this time, the bouncer was dragging him toward the door and I raised my hand and asked him to hold on.

"What the fuck are you talking about? You walk in here with my crazy ex- wife and sucker punch me onto my ass and accuse me. Hell, I don't have a damn idea who you are."

He looked me up and down.

"I'm Sandy's husband, motherfucker, and like I said, you touch her again I'll nut you like a pig."

They hauled him out of the place and to his car and I never saw him again. Charlene stood there crying like a fucking baby.

"I only wanted you to stop seeing her, that's all. I need you, Mike. Can't you see that?"

"Charlene, you better file the god damn papers or I'll file on my own. Now get the fuck out of here."

She had no sooner walked out the door when Sandy walked in. She strolled up to me oblivious to the social carnage that occurred several minutes earlier. I looked at her.

"Where's your wedding ring?" I asked

"What are you talking about, Mike?"

"Sandy ... Tall fellow, goober looking, likes to sucker punch, says he's married to you. He just left, Sandy 'Whateveryournameis, but I think if you shake your ass just half as good as you shake it for me, you might just catch up to him and maybe, just maybe, make things right. I don't know. But, one thing is for sure. I don't mess with married women and I'm sure as hell not messing with you."

She mouthed how sorry she was and turned and left

Charlene ended up filing the papers after I told her I was dead serious that if she didn't I would. I stayed away from the Running Dog for a little while and I never saw Sandy or her cuckolded husband again. Truth is I felt really bad for him. I had been cuckolded and now I had done it to somebody else. Apparently the rumor mill was working overtime.

"How long are you going to hibernate in your shop, Mike?"

She was snacking on peanuts again but it was only the two of us.

"Colleen, I'm not hiding or anything. I'm just taking a break from my overwhelmingly busy social scene, you know?"

"Shit, you've been buried up to your eyeballs in that shop since that little cunt's husband decked you at the 'Dog'. I've got an idea. Take me dancing tonight." She just smiled and knew she had won.

So that is what we did. We cut the rug, shook it up and had a great time. Both of us got asked to dance several times and we did for a few of them but we ended up back together every time. I got her out there on a slow number and asked her.

"So what happened to next best thing since sliced bread fellow you've been running around with for the past few months?"

She had her mouth close to my ear and whispered.

"He's not the man I want" and she then kissed my ear.

I'm not stupid most of the time and that was no exception. I held her face in my hand and kissed her soft lips until the song ended. Later that night, I stood in front of that mirror checking out the extra couple of inches on the belly and swore off Charlie's Barbeque until we finished the countdown. I looked at her reflection in the mirror. Jesus, she was a tiny girl in a big package. We had just finished Number 1 and we had 92 more to go. I was getting some really good loving from someone who loved me and I was appreciating every minute of that loving. As for Charlene's offer, no fucking way.

+++++++++++++++++++

Epilogue:

Charlene didn't like it a bit but she was officially divorced 102 days after Sandy's husband sucker punched me at the 'Dog'. She started dating some fellow because she was lonely or so she said but I have no idea how that is turning out and I just don't fucking care.

Colleen and I worked and worked on those remaining 92 lovings and a few days after I was officially divorced, I was even with Charlene. Colleen sold her Mom's house to a young couple just starting out and moved in with me. We haven't set a wedding date yet but we've been practicing the honeymoon damn near every night.