All Comments on 'Just Once... And Yes, I Mind Pt. 02'

I never comment. But there is always a first. The story is powerful and emotional. If this is some of the authors first work, wow, impressive. But my comments are directed at the comments by Anonymous (4 days earlier than mine), and Loejtc. As someone with the training, degrees, board level certification, and twenty plus years experience, I call BS on their comments. Even then, I wouldn't care, but they really seem critical. When Anonymous "cal" this ADD version, really, that's what going off on a big different direction means? You don't understand ADD. Loejtc's comments on personality profile, how Dr Trey would act, and such loose connections on Colombia's medical system (likely better than USA, I agree) meaning morning after pill would be a done deal...shows that they are not as knowledgeable as they think as they have way to little information to come to such conclusions. How they try to pretend that "they" know how things work (of course they can try, but others have to realize they are just full of S***), and if they wish things to be different, write your own stories. Congratulations to jonesapple, I would like to read more of your creative and unique stories!

Fascinating if largely implausible. Mostly excellent writing except for distracting flaws such as:

“… laying on the bed …”

“… between Janice and I …”

“… who wisely laid down.”

“… being shown how to pilot a 70 ton ship that is nearly 3 football fields in length.” I think you mean 70,000 ton ship.

It's not children's duty to carry on their parents sin, but this, this is total bullshit. TJ is a bastard and carry the sin of his asshole predator sperm donor.

Great story and very well done! It might have been better as a stand alone story. It didn't need the background of Kalaximos' classic. I hope you continue writing here!

No repercussions for Marcy, none...

The first part was pretty close to my first response except for the POA. I would have left her a quitclaim on an empty house and taken any money in the bank. Except for any jewelry/art/antiques she brought to the marriage, leave NOTHING. No furniture, clothes, or shoes.

The first half page of this should have been in part 1. Part 2 should have been tagged new beginnings. I wouldn't have read it if it wasn't indicated that he would see Marcy again. It turned out the gummint wanted to protect HER. Fuck her! Let her fly off to Africa on a relief mission and get kidnapped into a comfort station for a really happy ending. HAHAHAHAHA!

Second part was decent. First part was one of the worst wimp cuckold stories ever, The second is an entirely different story. To make it come out...the author has to invent an entire chain of deux ex machina additions to the point to where nothing from the first story really has anything to do with anything. Thus we have two entirely different stories that are clumsily linked by some shared characters acting in entirely different roles.

Frankly what kills it for me is the total lack of ANY repercussions on either the original bitch wife or the doctor she cheats with. What is even more bizarre is she presents her bastard child to her ex. Then, after the whole separate alternative history progresses to its lame conclusion...we have deux ex machina again....with the ex wife coming to the door yet again with the dear doctor apparently waiting in the car. Then (gasp) all is forgiven...and the cuckold husband...now remarried...forgives ALL and extends his protection to all of the ex, the dear doctor and the doctor's bastard child. This utterly and astoundingly LAME ending deserves to be immediately slid off the plate into the nearest garbage disposal.

As with the first another well deserved one star,

I know this is nitpicky BUT.... Part 1 indicates Rhonda's husband is a LTJG but in Part 2 he is an Ensign. Why the demotion? Still 5 stars though.

US hospital ships displace approx 60-70 'thousand' tons, easy to look up.

Logan was introduced early as a Ltjg (Lt junior grade; O2). He was later 'transferred' to Omaha as an Ensign (O1), junior to a Ltjg, also easyto fact check.

Overall a good story.

Yes, I have some military (Navy) years behind me.

Good story

Writing was good but it drifted too far off of the original storyline too where it was almost a completely new storyline. What happened to the BTB ending that Marcy so justly deserved, that is what I looked for and it just wasn't there.

This one just doesn't do it either. 2 stars

This used someone else's story as an introduction, discarded it, and went of on some dull gung-ho tangent and yet another (sigh) Rambo type, of which there are hundreds of dull tropes on this site. This, like all the others of it's kind, are literally interchangeable cut an paste drek.

A competent piece of writing but too much hard arsed, self-righteous machismo for me and his epiphany came a little late and sounded rather less than sincere.

LA

The beginning was a little slow but when Rick went postal, things started to look up. Several unexpected events later, the story got really interesting. I over the ending. A nice ending without having to bury the ex-wife, her husband and their child. All-in-all, a really good read. Worth the five stars.

excellent follow up to original story. more action and love creating a new and extended family "compound". Did like the airport and hotel confrontation in the original authors story

Way too much to be as a finish for the original. This was a whole separate “day in the life of”

Well written, but an extreme departure from Kalimaxos’ original story. Also it reads like an intrigue/action tale, with very little eroticism. (This is an erotic site, after all.)

If part one was brief, and unfinished, part two made up for those deficiencies. Four stars ⭐️ for this one.

Don't know why part 1 was solo; hardly anything there. Could've been melted into only a 1 part story.

I mostly liked it but thought things were thrown in not needed considering the original story (Rick going into

Africa, the bounty on him, etc.)

Not much that I saw (did I miss it?) after telling the general's 2nd in command that he's now a general. How did

that happen, & the result? Even with these questions, I felt that the entire situation was added to the story

just for the sake of adding. I wound up not reading it fully as the story eventually left me disinterested. Even

with Rick going out of the country for a bit, a little less things happen would've been better. However, I'm

happy that he got married & saved the little girl.

In the end, 3 stars. -- Bob

Not bad, but once you had Rick ripping his own arms off and beating himself, and if this was Janice's first wedding what happened to her 5ft. 3inch doughy husband? Still 4*

"if this was Janice's first wedding what happened to her 5ft. 3inch doughy husband?" you misread that part or the tale. That was Janice's Mother and Father being described not Janice.

Just another shitty story about forgiving the unforgivable

Read a few of the comments- complaining that it wasn't true to the original. Have to agree with that, but it was a great story as a stand-alone. Worth a 5.

The anonymous who said "forgiving the unforgivable" must have read another story. Who forgave whom? Or you just another ignorant troll? lpw

Damn good. The original story left the ending up for others to close and you did a commendable job

Thanks for writing

Very nice... love the place you took this story.

A definite 5.

EastCoaster

Sorry, got bored by end of first page

Should have just been written as a stand-alone story. Tying it to Kalimaxos’ story was a stretch and unnecessary

Rick didn't go postal, he went Jack Bauer, which is what the situation called for (although he gave the new "general" 36 hours, not 24). You done good, Mr. Apple, lit up the star chart.

this had little or nothing to do with Macey,s betrayal. Don't understand why you bothered.

Very good but had little to do with the original story. 4 stars

Good story

Like another of the “Just Once…” endings, this story took a hard tangent, and then got very dark at the end. Would have been better as a stand-alone story. It doesn’t keep to the spirit of the original.

I didn't like this story bec. it's too long & went off on a huge tangent. And that's why I also loved it: nobody else came close to writing this. The irony not caring about Trey ,Jr just to fall in love with Ami, both young children & not his, was excellent. However, it falls just a bit short knowing where Trey, Jr comes from.

---- A further irony, if you will, is the result of making sure, after the attempted kidnapping, that Rick's extended family's being safe- including his adulterous ex-wife. So many emotions running through this story (both parts). While, as a couple posters wrote, this didn't carry on in spirit, etc., with the original, this's the authors long ending. That this could've been a separate story, isn't that true of many additions? In the end, a powerhouse, if somewhat dark, story. 5 stars. Bob

WTF? Was this an ending to 'Just Once' or a paperback version of an Arnie Schwarzenegger movie?

Well written but I hate it when a cheating female gets off with zero consequences. Still a good story

Well done, interesting twist lead to a story all of your own.

Another great story. I like the China moving into Africa part of the story. That's definitely not fiction.

I assume you were with 5th group. I did my time with the 82nd. Sometimes I wish I had stayed in.

Please keep writing for a long ass time.

@Finn80561 I'd say having to be a parent to a toddler in her 50s is probably punishment enough. 🤣

Wow ! What a story you managed to include all the previous characters and still showed how you had moved on from your previous hate. Allowing all the important people in your past/ present their relevent position in your present and future. The general deserved no less and deserved the old you coming back for a good reason. Keep writing you have a deserved 5 stars.

Wow what a great story, really a good continuation of another great story. I am glad I to find another great author to follow. Very entertaining. Thanks for writing

Now I really enjoyed that story. Thank you for your efforts and the joy of reading your work.

Long winded, full of words that didn’t really make it into a really good story, full of details that might be true, might not be, it was just an average works to me. Full of money and people that had more control than is possible, 007 comes to mind, but not as good.

The sister thing got me in the feels. Loved this! 5 stars.

Loved it! 5 stars.

No payback or penalty for Marcy the cheating wife. She got to marry her lover, had his baby, and lived happily ever after. Three stars.

Outrageous!!! Amazing ... The best follow-up ever. Could not BE any better...

bit off with slut was back

Vanye,

Maybe but I think more was deserved. Just me I guess!

A really great second part. I was rather worried after the first part was so disappointing, but this was super interesting and quite redeeming, thanks!

My only concern is that (just like most of the sequels to that story) you never addressed the reason why Deidrre told the ex-bitch what happened; and in your story's case, why would he still trust Deidre after that? But that's a minor quibble, and doesn't detract from a very well written work.

Wow, five stars. This has got to be the best sequel I have ever read. I was rather upset at the end of Chapter 1 but you redeemed yourself.

The original story was silly. You can't polish a turd. The military parts are silly and unnecessary.

Just another excuse for a guns and army story, you blew off the original in one paragraph set in the hotel room. This is the loving wifes section not the gung ho section. If you are going to go gung ho at least make it relevent.

This should be in non-erotic.

It’s just a big ol’ bucket o’ hate. If you’re an author, and you really hate women, go ahead and write your screed, and submit it to non-erotic.

This is “Loving Wives” not “Ruining Women”.

The original Kalimaxos story was itself stupid, and written only to provoke this kind of reaction. Apparently, this made some insecure men go apeshit, which in turn, made them spew this sort of noxious claptrap.

You took it a ways past Kal, but in a good way.

Nice story on it’s own but must agree it did nothing to further the story of Rick and Marcy.

Wrong category. Should be in interracial

Use this husband in other stories, just as he is. You have a winner with him.

I understand this husband very well, although I think he's TOO civilized, he should have had that Adjutants fathers head in that bag as well, just to show him that he can be made to cry.

The right category, the right way to deal with the ungodly.

Zero tolerance, no mercy.

Very well done, thank you!

Ru---ler must lick under it's own tail to get the taste of vitriol out of it's mouth.

Just nitpicks... in the first chapter, Rhonda's fiancé was a LTJG. In this chapter, he's an ENS. When did he get demoted?

Also, USNS Mercy is 70 thousand tons, not 70 tons.

Second time around to read this story. The first read thru there were no comments. It is a bit over the top. To commit that amount of mayhem, he'd need a lot more logistical support and a good fire team. Then again, despite being a retired senior-commissioned officer, he is a jarhead, and they tend to cause a lot of wanton mayhem wherever they are.

pretty good though at times I wondered if I was reading the same story I started with. Maybe it was just my old mind wandering around with it's too full synapses. Good writing, so the bitch gets off with no punishment? Too bad.

Really weird how it totally took a turn into over-the-top. It may have started as a LW theme, but I don't think it ended up there.

I liked this second part of your story, JA, thanks for sharing. Seems to me like it strayed quite a bit from the direction that Kalimaxos’ original story was headed, but hey, it’s your story, your choice. That said, I really enjoyed this chapter, I thought it was a lot of fun. I’d even like to see more of the story. I think it’s a 5 star effort, so thanks again.

wow another one thats been done to death and yet you breathed new life into thax for the great read

Hood, but there is too much more required BTB and BTTrey left...

Much better