Just Once - Once is All You Get End

"It agrees with you. You look healthier and more at ease."

"It does. I spend my days reading, sitting on the beach, working out, and enjoying life with the few neighbors I have."

"You have neighbors?"

Rick laughed.

"There are a few others who have checked out and live down there like me. In fact, one couple are the ones who clued me into beach life."

Rick went on to tell him about meeting the Tittles and how he found himself being a beach bum. Daniel continued to ask questions that got Rick to talk about getting back into the habit of working out and how his lifestyle and diet had changed with his new minimalistic life. Finally, Rick couldn't put it off any longer and had to ask what was nagging on him.

"How are Cici and the kids?"

Daniel smiled.

"She sold that god awful mansion as soon as the divorce was final and moved to my place outside of town. It's not as ostentatious as her old place, but it has all the amenities. The kids are doing great. The asshole was never around anyway and wasn't much father to them, so they didn't suffer too much when he went away for good."

"What happened to him?"

Daniel laughed.

"Well. Cici took him to the cleaners and got almost everything that was left. The licensing people jerked all of his credentials so he can no longer practice medicine. The hospital sacked him in a heartbeat and, with no credential, he can't get a job. Not that it would do him any good. The FBI and the IRS are still on his case. It looks like he is going to do at least some time in a Federal lockup in the future."

"Serves the asshole right. I'm glad Cici and the kids came out all right."

"Well. She seems happy, but there is something missing. That spark that she used to have seems to be gone or greatly diminished."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Is there anything I can do to help?"

Daniel looked at Rick. Rick found the look strangely uncomfortable. He was soon to realize why when Daniel finally spoke.

"You're what's missing, Rick."

Rick took a deep breath, lifted the glass of beer, and cradled the long-neck bottle in both hands before he spoke.

"I'm sorry, Daniel. I never meant to hurt Cici or lead her on. I was so focused on what I thought I had to do that I wasn't seeing or feeling anything."

"I understand that. But I can see the changes in you now. I know Cici and the kids would love to see you. Why don't you come out to the house tomorrow?"

Rick looked at Daniel and was surprised to see something different in his eyes. It was almost a longing or even a bit of desperation.

"Daniel. I don't want to give you or Cici the wrong impression. I would love to see her and her kids again, but I'm not sure, given her emotional state, that she needs to see me. Staying here any longer than necessary isn't in the cards. I am going back to Texas and the beach. Regardless, I still have a lot of Texas to explore and things to work out internally."

"I know. And I wouldn't ask if I was not convinced that it was for the best for Cici. Since her mother died, she has been the focus and center of my life. She and those kids keep me going. But I also know she is a woman who has needs, both physical and emotional. I don't want her to miss out on the best years of her life living like a hermit. Please. Come see her. We can have an afternoon and an evening as a family. I already think of you like the son I never had."

"Part of my brain was jumping up and down screaming 'DON'T'. There was also a soft, clear voice whispering in my ear telling me this was something I should do and would regret it if I didn't accept. Surprisingly, the clear, soft voice won out."

"Ok. What time and where?"

For the first time that evening, Rick saw Daniel smile. Taking a business card, Daniel wrote an address on the back and slid it across the table to Rick.

"Come anytime you get ready. Plan on staying through dinner. If you have swim trunks, bring them."

"What can I bring?"

"Nothing. You show up and that is all that is necessary."

Rick nodded. The two continued to drink beer and reminisce for the rest of the evening. Finally, about 11 pm, Daniel stood up and looked at Rick.

"Before I go, I want to leave you with one thought. Cici has reconciled to herself that you are unreachable. She knows the heartbreak and the humiliation that your ex put you through. I don't know if her feelings are some kind of Daddy complex or a rebound response. I just want you to understand that if something does spark between the two of you, you have no worries from me. Do what you think is best for both you and Cici. Just don't let old wounds that may still be healing affect your emotions and your good sense."

Rick nodded and stood. Daniel offered his hand and Rick took it. The two stood face to face for several minutes before their hands unclenched. Daniel smiled and looked at Rick.

"I'm going to have to get back in the gym if we continue this little contest."

Rick chuckled and massaged his palm.

"You seem to be holding your own."

Later, Rick sat in his hotel room. He wore his usual gym shorts and nothing else. He was sitting in the recliner thinking. Rick felt like he hadn't had this much on his mind since he had gone to Texas.

&&&&&

Rick sat at the restaurant in the hotel with a cup of coffee in front of him, the remains of his breakfast across the table, and looked at the text his attorney had sent late the previous afternoon.

Rick. The supervising agent at the FBI office called late this afternoon. Apparently, you hit some nerves, and someone in the office forwarded a copy of that interview to whoever oversees the entire investigation into the DWB.

The supervising agent was happy to tell me that you are no longer of any interest to the FBI or any other agency. He assured me that you wouldn't hear anything else from them and were free to carry on with your life.

I will keep your power of attorney to deal with any other matters in this case that may come up. Have a good life. I hope this has all turned out to your satisfaction.

I thought about that last question. Did I really get what I had set out to do? Cardoza's life was shit. He had nothing left and was facing some serious jail time. I had to admit, I was more than a little satisfied with that outcome.

DWB was on the ropes. Their entire international operation was basically shut down and facing such intense scrutiny that I doubted that they would survive much longer. That was satisfying as well, until I thought about the kids in those third world nations that wouldn't have the chance for the life-changing medical procedures that were provided by DWB despite their less than moral operation. That kind of left a bad taste in my mouth. Collateral damage I hadn't considered.

I took an afternoon and drove out to our old neighborhood. I slowed down as I passed that house where all of this had started. It looked much the same as it had when I had walked out of it for the last time. Surprisingly, I felt little about that house where Marcy and I had raised a family. I guess I was finding my way forward.

I drove around the block and saw Vincent working in the front yard. There was a for sale sign near the road. I started to drive past but, on a whim, I stopped and rolled down the window.

"Hey Vince."

He looked at me confused, and then his eyes went wide with surprise.

"Rick! Shit! Where the hell have you been?"

"Texas. I had to come back on business. How are you and Leslie?"

"We aren't. Things just kept getting worse. When she came up with the idea to have her current lover and some of his friends tie me up to make me watch her with them, it was the end. I filed on her. We are in the middle of that right now."

I had to really concentrate to keep from saying 'I told you so' but I didn't. I think he read my mind. His face twisted into a sardonic grin.

"Yeah. I know. You told me."

I didn't have much of a comeback.

"You moving?"

"The divorce. Asset split, you know. I have a place closer to the University where I teach."

"Sorry to hear it."

"Ah well. It isn't like I wasn't warned, and not just by you."

"Leslie?"

"I honestly don't know. She hung around town for a couple of weeks. When she was served, she apparently disappeared. No one has seen or heard of her since. It looks like the divorce is going to turn into an abandonment."

"That's tough."

He looked a little depressed.

"And Jenny. I noticed her house has new vehicles in front of it."

"She finally sold out and took her share of her money and the kids and headed back to her parents place. I haven't heard from her since."

"I hope she comes through it ok."

"I think she will. She was probably the strongest of all of us."

I nodded and couldn't think of anything else to say.

"Good luck."

"You too."

I pulled away, and I thought I saw Vincent sobbing as I pulled away/

As I pulled down the street, my mind slipped back to Marcy. Off all of my intended victims, Marcy seemed to have swum to the top of the cesspool and climbed out with a rose scented towel. She had suffered to some degree financially thanks to my machinations. However, she seemed to have a Teflon coating. The hospital where she worked took such a hit from an image standpoint that the group that owned it filed for bankruptcy protection and sold the whole operation.

The DWB boondoggle left the hospital short-staffed and in bad shape. Despite what she had done and her involvement with DWB, the remaining staff advised the new management and administrative staff that Marcy's expertise and skill were vital to the surgical department, and she not only retained her job, but got a significant salary increase. I don't know about her personal life, but it seemed her professional career never missed a beat. She was still on good terms with the kids and her folks. I guess I missed the target with that part of my strike. What I did find was, despite what had happened, I no longer had the hate and disgust I had once felt for her. Instead, there was just a void where all that had once been. I had moved on as well, it seems.

It was Marcy who left me with the worst taste in my mouth. I had wanted her to suffer. She had been inconvenienced, embarrassed and forced to make some changes, but she didn't suffer the way others had suffered. For a few fleeting seconds, I considered revisiting my anger and devising another set of revenge plans for her. It only lasted a second. I didn't want to screw up my own life again by diving into that cesspool with her. With any luck, karma would eventually deliver what couldn't.

That left me with Daniel and Cici. As I sat at breakfast, I found myself vacillating in my own decisions. Part of me was still avoiding making the trip to Daniel's house. Somewhere during my musings, it occurred to me that I was afraid, and that was the root cause of my reluctance. I was afraid to face that 5'4" blonde spitfire. Me, 215 lbs of lean muscle, terrified to face 115 lbs of walking, talking, sex appeal. Yeah. I was terrified of how my brain and my body would react.

Finally, at about 10 am, I paid my bill in the restaurant. I stopped as I headed for the elevators and shook my head to no one. I was going back upstairs simply to delay what I knew I really must do. Turning, I headed to the parking garage to get my rental car.

I punched in the address on the GPS in the car. I found the route and I noticed that Daniel's house was a bit outside of town. It didn't look like a development. He and I had never really talked about what he did after he retired from the Army or where he lived. I shrugged and pulled out of the parking place.

As I followed the GPS, I saw a Walmart up ahead, and, on a whim, pulled into the parking lot. I grabbed a basket and started up and down the aisles. My first stop was the men's department. I had not brought a swimsuit from Texas. I addressed that problem by selecting a rather prudish and conservative set of trunks in dark blue. My next stop was the toy department, and I soon had some small gifts for Cici's kids. I passed the liquor section and was surprised to see that Walmart stocked a nice selection of Scotch, and I picked up a bottle of 19-year-old Macallamsingle malt. As I neared the check-out, I grabbed a pleasant bouquet of colorful flowers.

Back on the road, The GPS led me out of the city, and to a gate off the pavement. Behind the gate I could see a nice gravel road. It was almost a half mile until I topped a small rise. Laid out before me was a compound that included a barn and several outbuildings. The main house was large and expansive, all on one floor, and C-shaped with a beautiful blue pool in the center of the C.

I continued down the road toward the house. By the time I got there, I could see six figures standing under the wide portico that shaded the front door. I stopped short of the portico and got out. I stood and looked over the roof of the car. No one was moving, but everyone was smiling. Daniel broke the silence.

"I was about to think you weren't coming."

I grinned.

"Jesus, Daniel, It's only 11 am."

That broke the ice and they all moved forward. I met Daniel in front of the car, and we exchanged a tight bear hug. I could see Consuelo standing back a few steps with a huge toothy grin on her round face. Her eyes were twinkling. I felt hands on my legs as three little sets of arms were tugging at me, jumping and yelling excitedly. I looked at Daniel and he just grinned wider.

"I let it slip that you might show up today."

I dropped to one knee and was immediately smothered with hugs, kisses and excited exclamations. I discovered that I was "Uncle Rick" and everyone had an idea of what we were going to do the rest of the day. Once I had given each of them a hug and listened to their excited chapter, I stood and looked at Cici.

She looked radiant. She was wearing a pair of Bermuda shorts and a pink spaghetti strap shirt. With her hair pulled back into a loose ponytail, she was as gorgeous as I remembered. She stood still, and I could see the hint of uncertainty in her eyes. I looked directly at her and then opened my arms a bit. Her smile brightened, and she leapt forward into my arms. I wrapped my arms around her and felt her body conform to mine. As uneasy as I had been on the drive, it felt the relief and then tension slip from me as I held her diminutive form in my arms. I don't know how long we stood like that, but it didn't seem like long enough. I heard Daniel slightly behind me.

"Ok, you two. Consuela had lunch ready. Let's go in."

I didn't want to turn loose of Cici. I had to physically pull her arms from around my neck. I saw tears in her eyes as I stepped back.

"Wait. I have a few things in the car."

I grabbed the Walmart bags out of the back seat and followed the clan into the front door. As I walked, Cici stepped up beside me and I felt her small hand slip into mine. Inside, the kids were focused on what I had in the bags. I brought out the scotch first and handed it to Daniel. He was all smiles as he held the bottle and watched the rest of the rest of the reveal. I took out the gifts for the kids and watched as their eyes got big and then all of their attention was focused on the gifts. That left me and Cici. I pulled the flowers from the bag and handed them to her. I thought she was going to bawl as she took them. Consuela stepped up and offered to put them in water. I watched as Cici jerked away.

"No. I'll take care of these."

She leapt up and disappeared. In a few minutes, she returned with a crystal vase holding the flowers. She strode out onto the patio and put that flowers in the center of the table where Consuela had prepared for lunch. Daniel stepped up next to me.

"I think that's our cue."

I followed him outside. The house curved around the pool. I could see doors leading out to the pool from multiple rooms, and I assumed that the bedrooms all had access to the pool. I took a chair as Daniel sat across from me and Cici sat next to me. Consuela had the kids in the kitchen sitting at the table, already having lunch. Surprisingly, as we waited for Consuela to bring those huge salads that were lunch, conversation seemed to be a little strained. Finally, Daniel took charge.

"Rick. You have to tell Cici about where you have been living."

I looked at her and saw the intense look in her eye. She never wavered but remained silent. I took a deep breath. I decided to start with D-Day and my exit from the city. That led to tales about my travels and my adventures in Texas. Daniel asked more questions and I expanded on my impressions of Texas. I may have gotten a little enthused when I heard Cici giggle. I looked at her and her eyes were twinkling.

"Rick. I think you have found your place. You seem to be in love with Texas."

It occurred to me that she was right. The peace and ease that I had found in Texas was what I wanted and needed.

I continued with my description of Corpus Christi and the beaches. I told them about my meeting with the Tittles, my purchase of a ten-year-old travel trailer, and the weeks I had spent on the beach. When I finally finished, Cici sat in wonderment, just looking at me in wonderment.

"Rick. I am so happy that you have found peace. You deserve it. You look fantastic."

"How about you, Cici. Are you doing ok?"

She smiled.

"Yes. Moving out here with Dad was the best thing that could have happened. It has given me the chance to work through countless things and put my mind at rest. I am happy, the kids are wonderful, and I love being out here."

"No regrets?"

"A few. I regret that I let that sorry SOB take 8 years of my life. But that's about it. There are a few others, but now, they are inconsequential."

"I'm glad."

"What about you?"

I sighed.

"I don't regret what I did at all. Some of it didn't turn out like I had hoped. Some of it exceeded my expectations. I think the best thing I did was leave, but it didn't happen without some regrets. I feel like it was an act of cowardice. I didn't want to stay and have to face all the fallout that I knew was coming."

"You did what you thought you had to do."

"I guess. But I feel like I let plenty of people down by doing it."

Things got quiet for a few minutes. I guess each of us was lost in our own thoughts. I picked at my salad, avoiding eye contact with either Daniel or Cici. I was started out of my thoughts when three small faces appeared next to me. Jason, the oldest, looked up at me with large brown eyes.

"Uncle Rick. Do you want to go swimming? We usually swim after lunch before it's time for naps. Won't you come with us?"

Who could resist? I nodded as three sets of feet left the floor with a yell. I found my new swimsuit still in the Walmart bag.

"Where can I change?"

Daniel stood and grabbed his beer.

"Come with me."

I followed him across the pool to one of the sliding glass doors. He pulled it open.

"You can change here. It is one of the guest rooms. There is a bathroom through there."

I nodded and stepped inside, pulled the door shut and closed the drapes. In minutes, I had used the bathroom, stepped into the swim trunks, and pulled the drapes and the door open. I was greeted with three small grinning faces waiting patiently outside the door. I grinned, and they grabbed my hands, pulling me along toward the pool.

As we approached the edge of the pool, all three released my grip and made running leaps into the crystal-clear water. I started forward, concerned that the younger one might be in trouble. To my amazement, he came up swimming like a fish. I looked across the pool. Cici had also changed while I was changing. She was wearing a simple bright yellow tank suit that seemed to have been applied with a spray gun. I stopped, open-mouthed, and simply looked. Daniel came out of the kitchen and saw me, looked at her, and then guffawed loudly.