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All Comments on 'Karen'
by ThickAsThieves
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Anonymousover 5 years agoCritique
Positives: I like the characters very interesting group and lot of potential.
There is room for improvement: dialogue. Too stilted. People don’t talk in complete sentences. Need to intro Alaska more smoothly. Too abrupt. A lot of seemingly unnecessary odds and ends. Is the stalemate in the meeting important to the plot?
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ThickAsThieves@ThickAsThievesJust a guy in Alaska that likes to write periodically. The characters in my stories are real women, some are still among us and sadly, some no longer are. All of them were (are) special and beautiful in more ways than one. Peace!
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