All Comments on 'Kate's Visit'

This was a sexy story and got hard off it fairly quickly. can't wait to see what's in store next

This definitely needs another chapter!

they need to continue and stay together it is never good for them to start then seperate. if they don't stay together it makes family reunions and get togethers awkward and they end up move apart they need to be together totally. that being said you really need a dictionary and a good editor way to many wrong words used an editor would help alot find one and do a rewrite now

Good story. You have kept it believable. Kate is a very understanding sister, she is helpful in many ways. More sister's should help brothers out. Keep writing and stay realistic

You omitted lots of commas that should be there. Especially when quoting what is said. Read up on that rule. Also, some paragraphs need to be broken when the focus or subject changes. The story itself is good, just poor construction.

There's a reason why the writers name is BadWriter.

;-))

I have to laugh when I see the grammar police on this site nitpicking commas and paragraphing. In the scheme of things, this is no where close to the scores of really atrocious writing that show up here. I appreciate the simplicity of this story. It makes it more believable. It corresponds to the naivete of the narrator. While I don't usually like these too short vignettes, it seemed appropriate in this case. Afterall, it was just "an innocent handjob." You managed to complete this short story without that awful "to be continued". And I appreciate that it's the siblings side of the incest genre. You should continue writing and enjoy your stories.

filthy disgusting dirty boy, badwriter. how dare you miss those commas

"Why are we sat indoors on such a nice day?" Does anyone really talk with such awful, twisted sentence structure? "Her stomach was bear and was firm, flat and smooth." I'll bet her mouth was horse. Your pseudonym is quite apropos. USE AN EDITOR.

OK, some minor punctuation problems, but a very, very hot story. It has a 'believable' aspect to it. Good job.

This is a good story but you definitely need to reread your story, have a dictionary by your side to check the spelling and meanings of the words you are using and let someone else read your work before submitting it. Spellcheck will not tell you if you are using the wrong word. All it does is tell you if the word is spelled correctly.

Blech! I couldn't even finish reading it, just skimmed to the end! ...and the sister? She wasn't doing it for her brother, she was doing it for her own entertainment! Don't touch me! This is about me having fun wanking my brother's teeny weiner, not about what you want or would like! Don't ask for it again, because, like I said, this is really about me and what I want!

Fun girl ..

Too many restrictions keeping HER in control....

Peeing in front of him....Tempting him....

I liked that his cock was average sized...That was refreshing!