Keep Rehearsing and Keep Performing

Grant watched on with amazement as a moment later, she began to force out the smoke and a flow that seemed endless to her escaped through her beautiful lips. Her face changed as she understood that she was actually succeeding, fear was replaced by euphoria, and she was washed over by a sense of pride!

"I DID IT!" She screamed with a big smile before remembering to remove the ash that had grown on the tip of the cigarette as she waved her hands around before giving herself a literal pat on the back.

Grant just had to clap, he stopped before he looked to silly himself. "That was amazing, well done. Great flick on the ashtray too." He continued to shower her in praise.

Even Rachel was surprised by her own enthusiasm, but certainly not as much as Grant, although she couldn't know that because he was using every ounce of self-control to maintain his deadly serious poker-face. She thought of the task as nothing less but daunting and the fear of not being able to do it, made her burst with pride and amazement when she instead realized that she had been able to inhale a volume of smoke that could hardly been compared to what she barely inhaled only three weeks earlier. She knew it probably didn't make much sense to be so proud, but it was her competitiveness that always kicked in in front of a challenge.

"That was awesome! Great work, Rachel!" Grant complimented approvingly to reinforce even more her sense of accomplishment. "Try again!"

With more confidence than before, Rachel did it again and the larger amount of nicotine made her quickly dizzy. Not in a bad way, but in a great way, she felt a buzz that she had not had since Imogen had made her inhale for the first time a couple of years ago.

"Wow that is amazing!" Grant confirmed that she was on the right track. "Rachel, please, don't go too crazy, you might start to feel queasy!" he laughed as he could see that the nicotine was hitting her bloodstream. Her eyes told him that she maybe had got a little too relaxed.

"Nor do I!" she stated as she noticed the smoke that still drifted out her mouth as she spoke. With a quick glance at Grant for confirmation with a quick tap of her finger she manicured the cigarette above the ashtray and then they both sat in silence waiting a few moments to pass. Grant tapped his fingers on his knee, she took that as the hint and repeated the inhale in exactly the same way the previous drag, making sure that she pulled on the cigarette for full three seconds to keep Grant happy to inhale as much of the now rather delightful smoke into lungs as she could.

However, even after declaring that they were not going to go crazy, Rachel with growing enthusiasm repeated the process over and over again. For an enjoyable four minutes until with the heat from the burning cigarette getting too close to her fingers she reached over and crushed the completely finished butt out in the ashtray.

It was not difficult for Rachel to notice that she had finished the latest cigarette far more quickly than the previous four. Her chest now felt heavy, but that was the Ying to the Yang that she was enjoying the uplifting feeling from the nicotine in her bloodstream, she was happy that she had passed the test.

Grant was more than pleased. He believed that he had just conquered any important milestone. Rachel had smoked three cigarettes instead of her usual two and he had planted the idea to keep on improving her style and technique. But most importantly it seemed that Rachel had bought the suggestion to move to stronger cigarettes. He needed to make sure she'd stick to the plan, so he welcomed when after chatting for a bit discussing technique and how much lung capacity she has, Rachel picked up her pack of Marlboro Light 100s and studying it intently

"So...I was thinking...What type of cigarette should I smoke, if you think these are not good anymore?" She looked a little disappointed.

Grant shrugged his shoulders "That's for you to determine. My Penny she smoked Newport menthols, but I don't think they are for you. I really don't have preferences. It's going to be your choice really." He winced aware that she had hospital passed the problem back to Grant

"As I don't have a clue. I've only ever smoked these, apart from the half pack of B&H's that I found in the cupboard by accident...I wouldn't really know what to ask for!" Rachel questioned.

Grant nodded as thoughts cascaded through his brain. "Yes, I have an idea..."

"Oh?" Rachel looked on with growing scepticism.

"Yes, I think it will be perfect, how about I pick up a selection of different packs for you to try tomorrow. You will end up with a selection box to choose from. I need to stop for fuel since my truck is almost empty, so it's really no big deal for me, actually it would be an honour."

Rachel bit her bottom lip as concern crossed her face, "Oh, really?"

"Yes!"

"Wow that would be very sweet of you. Are you sure?"

"Yes, it will be perfect.

"Thanks, I think, it all sounds intriguing, and almost fun- a selection box!" Rachel stated with excitement, then frowned. "But not of the sweet chocolate variety..." she shook her head and giggled.

"No, true, but I think you will enjoy them. I'll drop by tomorrow when I get back from work!"

Grant needed indeed to fill up his truck, but his offer wasn't only out chivalry. He planned to buy a little assortment of increasingly stronger cigarettes for his pupil so that she would not ever encounter the issue of running out of cigarettes. He knew how much Penny hated it. There was also the subtle idea to help her explore a variety of brands. His cunning plan excited him, and that night instead of sleeping he spent way too much time figuring out what to buy for her. But he did not mind.

Rachel had to drink gallons of water that evening to wash her throat out. She was positive that she could still taste the harsh remnants of the smoke on her tongue and throat. She shoved another chewing gum in her mouth and frantically started chewing. Then smelling herself, stripped off there and then in the kitchen and threw all her clothes in the washing machine. Everything around her reeked of cigarette smoke. Her hair just smelt awful. She felt dirty.

That night all of 200 yards away from Grant she also then tossed and turned all night. For a completely different reason. She had Grant's words spinning in her head, she was curious about his comments about the visibility of her smoke; it was something she had never thought about, although she had already spent a significant amount of time looking at old black and movies researching for her role.

The next morning however, right after breakfast she presented herself in front of the mirror already for her morning task. She could not wait and had already her lit cigarette in the kitchen. It was burning brightly between her right index and middle fingers, as she purposedly climbed the stairs ready to study very carefully how her smoking looked like. It was now part of her morning routine to have at least one cigarette right after putting in the dishwasher her cereal bowl, but that Monday morning there was a hint of eagerness to finish eating to then get to her first cigarette lit. Rachel didn't think much of it, assuming it was because of her curiosity to compare her own smoking with that of those stunning vintage celebrities she had studied.

She was almost entirely correct, although there was also another reason why she had felt that impatience. There was something else that had growing inside her that needed to be solved, but she had not noticed yet, because it was still too new and far too faint.

Rachel stood there and smoked that first cigarette of the day with an intense zealous lust, just following the instructions just as Grant had wanted her to. For fun and for the practice she alternated exhaling straight towards the mirror, then up towards the ceiling and finally down towards her feet. She moved her head around whilst keeping her eyes peeled on the mirror the best, she could so that she could see her reflected image and then before the cigarette was completed, she repeated a few of the poses she had studied in the movies the night before.

For the first time she tried reciting a couple of lines, looking for the spot to get the break to pause to inhale and exhale. She played around with body positioning, trying to get it to look natural and not forced.

She noticed that the smoke wasn't nearly as visible as in the movies. She could see that the background and the lighting made a big difference, but the smoke was never as clear and thick in her mirror as it was in the movies. It actually surprised her that even if she was taking as large drags as she could, the smoke she exhaled appeared so diluted and thin. Naturally, it never occurred to her that holding the smoke deep buried inside her chest for at least three seconds at a time just as Grant had specified didn't help as the contents of the smoke quickly transferred to her waiting bloodstream.

Act 1 Scene 5

"Love art in yourself, and not yourself in art."

Just as Rachel correctly predicted just before her dinner time, Grant enthusiastically knocked on her front door, and then rang the doorbell. She may have been hovering a little too close to it and opened the door far too quickly, as he was still mid ring.

It was almost as if Christmas had come a month early, but rather than Grant carrying Santa's sack it was all in the plastic local convenience store carrier bag. Grant followed Rachel into the house as she pulled the packs out and laid them across the kitchen counter.

There was a new pack of Benson & Hedges 100s, a pack of Virginia Slim 100s, a pack of Marlboro Red 100's, one of Camel 100s, and finally a box of chocolates.

She looked with disbelief, "Wow, thanks Grant, you really didn't have to buy all these packs for me, there is like nearly a hundred of cigarettes, that's way too much for me, I will never smoke them!" Rachel said a little embarrassed realizing that she might take advantage of her neighbour. "How much do I owe you, especially for the chocolate?"

Grant laughed hard "Nonsense! I don't know how many sodas and beers you've offered me in the last few weeks, so this was the least I could do!" he grinned.

Rachel nodded, "Oh, if you...are sure... thank you, it was a nice gesture anyway."

Grant nervously chuckled. "The pleasure is all mine, it really is."

Rachel nodded in agreement "Right, so which one do I start with tonight?"

"Well Rachel, I am afraid that is up to you?" Grant rubbed his chin. "However, as you are asking, my suggestion might be, that as you already know the B&H's maybe go for them first?"

Rachel put her hand down on the gold pack and tapped her index finger on the top as like a nodding dog, her head continued to nod in agreement, "Okay, cool, I've still got one of the lights left from the old pack. I will crack on the Benson and Hedges first thing tomorrow?" She smiled happily at Grant.

"Well in that case, shall I leave you for this evening?" Grant tentatively asked.

Rachel took a deep breath "I would invite you in for dinner, but I've only got a meal for one, and I don't think it will stretch." She apologetically shrugged her shoulders.

Grant grinned "It's fine, I will see you tomorrow?"

"Deal."

***

Rachel roughly cleaned the kitchen table of crumbs, making a rough pile in the middle to deal with later. She was focused and had prioritised making enough space for herself and then dumped her single plate and knife and fork in the sink with the breakfast bowl and spoon. Then metaphorically she rolled up her sleeves as she sat down at the kitchen counter and staring at the open pack of cigarettes along with her new ones all laid out in front of her. It was just gone seven o'clock. It was her designated time to smoke again and sadly it was going the last cigarette she had left in the pack of Marlboro Light 100s. With trepidation, she knew it meant that the next one would again back to the rather unpleasant, harsher, much stronger cigarette, and the thought of that made her a little uncomfortable.

With several weeks of repetition built in, she had some muscle memory, so with the cigarette dangling from her lips she flicked the lighter and lit up making sure just as Grant instructed that she took three seconds long drag.

'As my coach wants!' she thought smiling at her own joke as she watched the smoke as it slowly trickled out of her lips

Rachel was of course intrigued and curious about the pack Grant had bought for her. The golden pack of Benson & Hedges was familiar, and she had an idea of what to expect from them. The other brands were all unknown. She recognized the famous red and white pack of Marlboro 100s and after taking yet another drag, she wondered how different they would be from the cigarette burning in her hand. She found the pack of Virginia Slims 100s was very elegant feminine design and was far less impressed by the somewhat ugly yellow pack with that funny camel drawn on top. She kept bringing the filter of her Marlboro lights to her lips and smoking absentmindedly as her attention was on the four packs which she flipped and turned with amusement. There wasn't only concern in her mind, but another feeling began growing inside her, reinforced by each long drag that she successfully inhaled. Was that anticipation?

Rachel exhaled a large cloud up to the ceiling and stubbed out the butt of finished Marlboro Light 100 next to the others in the ashtray on the countertop and went about washing her throat of the rather bitter taste of smoke, by fixing herself a cup of decaffeinated coffee. She returned to her stool and took a sip. The coffee tasted good, especially as it washed away the taste of tobacco from her tongue. At this point she was almost impatient, mostly wanting to get rid of her concerns on how difficult it would be for her to smoke those stronger cigarettes, but also curious to put her training at test.

Normally, she waited around half an hour between trying to have her final cigarette of the day, but sat there looking at the different packs, she decided almost without Grant's permission to have the second one right away.

'This way I'll be done earlier!' she knowingly congratulated herself.

Having already tried the Benson and Hedges, and feeling as if she knew them well, it was almost an instinctive choice to open that pack. After tearing the cellophane wrap, she noted that there was no lid to flip open. She remembered Grant saying he had explicitly chosen soft packs for her to learn and now she to figure out how to open it. It didn't take her long to figure out that she needed to tear open one corner of the folded foil but then she struggled to extract a cigarette. Thankfully she had nicely manicured nails with which she eventually was able to pull one cigarette out.

'This is silly! My heart is beating as if this was the first time I smoked!' Rachel thought as she brought the cigarette to her lips and flicked the lighter.

"Here it goes..." she said to her hand and moved the flame to the tip of the cigarette.

She sucked in gently and watched as the dancing flame bent slightly towards the tobacco and it quickly the ignited. Rachel felt the smoke invade her mouth. Of course, she expected it but didn't dare taking a drag as long as she had done lately, fearing the strength of the full-flavored cigarette. She removed the burning all-white cylinder with her free hand and inhaled instinctively before she could consciously hesitate. The strong rich smoke rushed towards the innermost recesses of her chest. The sensation was unmistakably more powerful, and Rachel felt her lungs pressured from within as the nicotine already started spreading through her bloodstream.

Her eyes widened, "Wow! I forgot how much stronger they are!" Rachel said out loud still holding all the smoke inside.

Then, she began exhaling and once again feeling the liberation of the dense smoke from her delicate airways.in

Rachel was thrilled by her own personal success and proudly took a gulp of coffee enjoying it as it cleansed her smoke covered pallet, before instantly returning the cigarette to her lips for a second drag deep drag. Painting her throat in smoke yet again. Not only had she lit up soon after finishing her previous Marlboro Light 100, but she was getting much more nicotine for every drag and soon she felt lightheaded.

'Okay, I better slow down' She thought as the fear of feeling sick loomed.

She adjusted herself and then spaced her drags out, alternating them with gulps of coffee to wash the throat and sooner than she thought the cigarette was burning close to her fingers and was very much finished. She was absolutely ecstatic and even though her chest felt heavy, she was relieved by discovering that her daily practice had prepared her well for the challenge of smoking. She had not been sick. A big, worrisome load had been taken off her back and she was now happy.

Act 1 Scene 6

"If you are looking for something, don't go sit on the seashore and expect it to come and find you; you must search, search, search with all the stubbornness in you!"

Rachel was sitting quietly in her kitchen, her elbow taking some of her weight as it lent on the centre island. She tilted her head back and gently sucked on the filter. Her lungs were again quickly reacquainting themselves with the potent mix of nicotine rich smoke from a full-flavored Benson & Hedges 100. Whilst Rachel thought the practice meant that she was doing well with style externally. Nicotine was now easily winning its evil battle internally.

Through the two external walls of their houses Grant was sitting in his kitchen staring out of the window twisted so he was looking in the direction of Rachel's house and fence between their gardens. He knew that this evening Rachel was bound to open one of the new packs he had bought for her. He did not know if she would wait until the morning or be sitting there smoking one now. He could not tell.

He still couldn't believe that she had been given him the opportunity to follow up close and personal the smoking development of this young, beautiful, vibrant, joyful, and dreamy woman. For Grant it was amazing to sit beside her and watch as she slowly descended herself into the realm of a smoke-filled addiction. To Grant she was stunning.

Until now, Rachel had accepted all his suggestions and had not questioned whether her smoking needed being so intense. She seemed to be enjoying herself. He feared that sooner or later she might start opposing and rejecting his requests. If that would happen, he knew it was important that he did not push too her too far. Because there was no denying that he now enjoyed her friendship. But Grant could not help but wonder if there wasn't more between them than that.

Of course, seeing her smoke and even more witnessing her progresses day by day from novice to experienced smoker was incredibly exciting to him. She became more and more natural. More than once, he felt a distinct stiffness between his legs, that he had tried to conceal the best he could. Moving his knees or crossing his legs. And even right now, he was hard dreaming of being a fly on the wall in the same room as her, watching as she lit up one of the fuller flavoured cigarettes was driving him nuts. The grey smoke slowly drifting from her gorgeous pink lips. He had also noted since he had taught her to take longer drags, he she sometimes she did natural cute snaps when she inhaled. He was sure that when smoking the stronger cigarettes that whip of smoke would be so much thicker and denser, momentarily hiding her beautiful lips behind a white creamy ball of smoke.