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"Got to HELL, Sophia. I DON'T CARE!!"
The cops told her she would have to leave and escorted her and her luggage to the curb. She pulled her cell phone out and called an Uber.
The cops apologized and waiting, while she told the driver to take her to the Penninsula Hotel. She got in and left.
Part 2 to follow.
- COMMENTS
consulting91about 2 months agoA great start. I’m not sure you can get the restraining order or divorce papers into court on the weekend, but still a fantastic start.
jmacs2042 months agoWhat really killed this story for me is the MC did NOTHING to try and stop her, basically screamed at her to do what she wants and storm off, all on the "advice" of a complete stranger who told him to do nothing about a serial seducer targeting his wife, AND HE LISTENS TO HER?! Then has the nerve to claim the moral highground?! No self-respecting husband would ever act this way unless the marriage was on life support and even then, the SCREAMING over her and not letting her even speak is beyond realistic. This entire story is worse than contrived, it is abysmal. I expected better from you, LT.
mariverz3 months agoFlatlandphilabout 2 months ago
Tnicoll is the author you're looking for. The story is titled 'Conversations' I believe. Her name was Jill.
Yep
Pd.
Esa historia es realmente horrible, bien escrita ...pero horrible
Flatlandphil5 months agoTnicoll is the author you're looking for. The story is titled 'Conversations' I believe. Her name was Jill.
Anonymous5 months agoBurning the DESPICABLE, THREE HOLE CUM DUMP, CHEATING, POS WHORE to the ground .... EXCELLENT!
The "BEAR" gets ** 5 ** Stars!
Keep up the good work Sir!
AllNigher11 months agoNot bad, bit quick on the attack given he didn't even let her say she was leaving with the guy. What if she had something else to say? Believe the strange woman pretty damn quick...
Few ever really explain how this happens. Sorry but hard to believe someone who goes after married women kind this rarely fail. Unless they are drugging out otherwise forcing it coercing them, if be surprised with a fifty percent success rate. That said this is fantasy so....
Still not a bad read.
Ruttweiler11 months agoThe only reason you wrote the MC as having a wife is so he’ll have someone to dump. You don’t show a relationship, you don’t show a bond, you show nothing but instantaneous attack. Scorched earth. I’m surprised he even knew her name. I’m surprised you, as an author gave her one.
You don’t have characters, you have caricatures. You don’t have a plot, you have a pro forma sketch.
You should know that you are a terrible writer. You do know that, don’t you? You do know this is awful, don’t you?
oldtwit12 months agoLT56linebacker, your so right about lots of the Anon's I think most only post a comment just to be narsty, they don’t have the guts to log in or maybe your right, they are on 12.
I think you thinking about George Anderson’s amazing story “February Sucks” as the one that you read first, and many alternate endings have been written since then, you’re going down the same route, but have made many changes.
Nice work though.
fredbrownabout 1 year agoBoth sides are out of whack and juggling nitro bottles! This little tale is a-gonna be mean! Let'er rip
Anonymousover 1 year agoWhat's this crap, "You don't own my body." You took a vow , didn't you? "FORSAKING ALL OTHERS". What do you think that means?! Good beginning. 5*.
