Left Alone Ch. 08

Caleb couldn't get over how normal all of this felt- from waking up with Liam to a simple trip to the grocery store. It was like he could see the rest of his life appear in small flashes like these. As Liam paid the bill, he casually snuck a twenty into the boy's pocket and received a nod of acknowledgement. Liam had gotten better at taking his money- not because he thought he needed it, but because he wanted Caleb to be his equal in every sense. Even as they walked back to his car- the worn-down model in a sea of luxury brands fitting for this area- Caleb didn't even bat an eye. He placed the groceries in the trunk and after slamming it shut, he grabbed Liam by the loose ends of his hoodie and pulled him into a kiss. The older boy didn't resist, instead he let out a cute little laugh before placing his lips on Caleb's. It felt easy, and after all of those years of unrequited effort- he couldn't imagine going back.

"Come on let's see it?"

"No." Liam shouted out from upstairs. Caleb chuckled as he pulled the fresh towels from the linen closet. He set them on the counter and turned towards the stairs, leaning on one of the balustrades as he heard the boy fumble around.

"It can't be that bad." He said, feeling slightly guilty about the pair of board shorts he lent him. "Besides, they're the only pair I have that can even fit you."

"Just barely!" Liam reminded. He sulked down the hallway and made his descent down the stairs. Caleb watched as those bare feet made their way down, letting his eyes travel up to see the boy for everything he had. He bit down on his lip, moving up to those sculpted legs and thighs that were barely covered by a tight pink pair of shorts that clung to every muscle with a vacuum seal. Caleb could see the perfect outline of his cock with that prominent mushroom head peaking in between the white drawstrings.

"I feel like I'm a centerfold in a trashy Hollister ad."

"It's not my fault all of my other trunks were too small for you." He said, pulling the boy by the waistband and closing the gap between them. "Besides, at least all the essentials are covered" he said, taking note of the few centimeters of the boy's shapely ass that was left exposed.

Liam groaned as the younger boy kissed along his shoulder, softening up like a bucket of ice ready to spill over the sides. "Stop looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like you're gonna jump my bones any second."

Caleb laughed as he grabbed the towels and walked out to the backyard. "Yeah that's definitely not possible my dear boyfriend." He took a few more steps, dangerously inching the edge of the pool as both of their half naked bodies got drenched in sunlight.

"Besides" he said, forming a devilish smile on his face. "You look even better when you're wet."

Liam couldn't stop the boy of he tried. Caleb grabbed onto his waist and held on as he leaned back, dragging the boy with him as they fell into the deeper end of the massive pool. Soon, water encased their bodies as they sunk deeper, filling the pool with bubbles as they laughed underwater. Liam curled his arms around Caleb's and pulled the boy up as they started to tread water. He shook off the excess and wiped his eyes clear of any stray droplets.

"Cheap shot, Torres." He said, spitting water along the boy's chest.

"It got you to stop complaining about the shorts." He said with a shrug, "Besides, you're keeping them or we're through." He added a laugh as if Liam had any reason to worry.

A little while later, Caleb broke out an inflatable raft that he bought a few weeks ago- hoping a nice day like this would come. Not long after that, he lay on top of Liam's chest as they floated together on the raft, whisked away in the soft morning breeze. They stayed like that, with only the small splashes of water and the muted sounds of a song playing several houses down. It was peaceful, the younger boy thought as he nuzzled into that still damp skin, slowly drying under the sun.

"Do you think we can have more days like this?" Liam asked, in a soft voice as if he was half asleep.

"It's supposed to be sunny these next couple weeks, so yeah I'm sure we can."

He shook his head slightly, "I meant just you and me doing completely normal things: waking up next to each other, shopping for groceries, driving around town, laying around like this."

"You know I used to get really nervous whenever we'd be together." He paused, "I always felt like it was too perfect, and that reality would sink in at some point to try and balance the scales."

Liam stroked the boy's arm, "We've been through a lot, Caleb. We spent many years in our own solitary confinements." He shifted his weight on the raft, nearly tipping them over, but he held onto the boy and pulled them towards the edge of the pool.

Caleb hugged at Liam's sides, wrapping his legs around the boy's waist as his back rested against the tiled edge. Liam caressed the boy's jaw and wiped away the stray strands of hair from his face. Caleb smiled as the boy opened his mouth to speak.

"All I know is I wanna be hear with you from now on."

***

A few weeks had passed since the two boys admitted their feelings to each other and since then, it felt like they were ice skating on top of a lake that wouldn't melt. Caleb spent a lot of time over in Clover, exploring the little shops and helping Liam cook dinner for the three of them. Mrs. Holt loved it too- finally resting on the fact that her son was happier than she'd seen him before. On her later shifts, she'd come home well after ten to see the two boys cuddled up next to each other on their small sofa. Liam draped the sleeping boy with his arm and covered the both of them in his favorite childhood blanket only to fall asleep himself, thinking he'd be able to wake up before she got home. But she had no problem with it, instead she'd smile and quietly go into her room leaving the boys as they are.

One Saturday afternoon, Liam picked up Caleb from his house to see him clutching a few large envelopes in his hand. He smiled as he pulled into the driveway, but wasn't able to shake the nervous look on his face as he got closer.

"Did you bring it?"

Caleb nodded as he got into the seat. "Two more came in this morning. I- I haven't opened anything yet."

"Neither have I." He leaned over and took the boy's hand in his, "Mom says it's been burning a hole in the coffee table since it came yesterday. I just couldn't do it alone."

"Let's open them together, right now."

Liam nodded, kissing at the boy's fist, "Ok yeah. But- but not here." And with that, he put the car in drive and made his way out of Lakeshore. He took that familiar turn, feeling that breeze ruffle through his short curls as the tall trees made their appearance. He looked over at Caleb and placed a hand on the boy's leg that continued to shake as they got closer to the clearing. It wasn't until Caleb saw that view, that he actually started to breathe again. He took in that fresh air mixed in with Liam's scent and got out, clutching their envelopes close to their bodies.

Liam sat down on the soft patch of grass and rested his back on the grille of his car, still warm to the touch. Caleb sat beside him, so close that their denim jeans nearly molded into a single piece. He looked his boyfriend in the eye as he felt those strong hands clench his quivering jaw. Liam kissed at the boy's forehead, calming him for the time being.

"On three."

Caleb nodded as they started to count down. Once they hit one, he hooked a finger in between the seam of his letter and ripped it. The sound that came off was like a glass bowl falling off a high counter, only to smash into millions of jagged pieces- never to be put back again. He looked down on the stray pieces of paper turned into confetti and pulled out the contents of the letter. He read it to himself, nearly running off the edge of the cliff as the words "We are pleased to inform you" rolled off the paragraph like a boulder collecting speed. The more he read, the wider his mouth opened in an expression that was mixed between shock and utter joy. He didn't even believe it until he saw that familiar seal- a torch surrounded by a sea of bright purple- with a bolded text that read "New York University".

Caleb had been so caught up in his acceptance that he almost forgot that Liam was right beside him, finding out his fate. He looked over at the boy who had an expression he couldn't quite place. He called out, "Liam?"

"I got in." He said, in a voice that was so low- it was like the magic words to break a hundred-year long curse. He turned to Caleb with a few tears in his eyes, "I got into Parsons."

Caleb immediately wrapped his arms around the boy and hugged him tight, nearly squeezing out all of Liam's tears. He kissed at the boy's cheek, holding onto that letter like it was his golden ticket. Liam felt his voice crack, admitting, "I never thought I'd get accepted anywhere. I didn't think I was good enough."

The younger boy held on tight as the strong, impenetrable wall that was Liam Holt let out a few hollow sobs. After letting it all out, he calmed himself as Caleb's hands rubbed at his back.

"You got yourself into Parsons- no one else." He grabbed the boy's face, making sure his words were heard, "You did this, Liam."

Liam nodded as he pressed their foreheads together. He never thought he could feel that much support from anyone in his life. These past few months, it felt like Caleb was beside him, carrying some of load he'd been forced to hold up himself.

He wiped away the last few tears, "God I've been so caught up with my letter that I haven't even asked about yours. What does it say?"

"I got into NYU." Caleb said, which caused the other boy to squeeze him just as hard. He watched as Liam's eyes went wide with excitement with lips curling into the biggest smile that could fit on his face.

"I'm so proud of you, baby." Liam said as he showered Caleb with as many kisses as his lips could manage.

"What about you? Parsons? You didn't even tell me you were applying there!"

Liam let out a shy smile, "I just didn't want to jinx it. I was looking at a few here in California, but then Mr. Frost pointed me towards Parsons and I just knew there wasn't anywhere else I wanted to go." He shrugged, "And then you told me about NYU and how great their Journalism program is, and it was all too perfect to mess up."

Caleb let out a breath- the first he'd had since getting out of the car. "You don't know how happy I am that we'll be in the same city."

Liam took the boy's hands, "Caleb, it's literally an eight-minute walk to our schools. That's half the time it takes to drive from Clover to Lakeshore!"

He trampled on the boy as they rolled off a few feet, covering themselves in loose blades of grass. Caleb laughed as he watched those wide eyes showering him with affection. He kissed at the boy in between laughs. "We'll have each other- you and me."

Caleb nodded in agreement as he rubbed the boy's arm, "You know, before all this, I couldn't wait to graduate, get away and finally be on my own. I felt like leaving was the only way to finally deal with all my shit."

Liam slid beside the boy, snaking his arm under his back. "I think for me, I was convinced that I'll only be good enough for this town- that trying to pursue anything past city limits would be too high of hopes. But this letter-" He reached and took hold of Caleb's hand, "and you- both prove that not I'm stuck like I thought I was."

Caleb leaned back into Liam's chest as the afternoon clouds passed by. "We owe it to each other to see where all of this takes us. I just can't imagine doing it without you."

Liam ran his fingers through the boy's hair as he felt Caleb's weight comfortably lying on him, "Not in a million years."

***

Liam was still brushing off loose blades of grass from his shirt when he parked just outside his building. He'd dropped off Caleb after rolling around in the field for another half hour after showering each other with compliments and kissing wherever the exposed parts of their body would allow. They'd each be having talks with their parents tonight about college and he just knew that the one Caleb was having would go much smoother.

He grabbed that wrinkled letter- collateral damage from their frolicking in the grass and stuffed it into his pocket. Liam let out a few sighs as he climbed up the steps, preparing himself for the biggest reveal of his life, even surpassing his coming out. For as long as he was conscious of it, Liam always spoke about his future in the most vague and general terms there were. He never once mentioned college- apart from the few times he was directly asked by random people- to which he'd simply reply with a "maybe." And the thought of leaving his mom (and this town), though tempting, always felt out of reach. Truth was, the Holts were so much more concerned with getting to tomorrow or next week, that plans so far away and abstract like college just seemed like a waste of time.

Turning the knob, Liam stepped inside and was immediately hit with the scents of lemon and rosemary as he made it to the kitchen. His mom sat in the living room, cradling a glass of what he knew to be sweet tea as she lowered the volume on the TV. She called out, "Hey honey. I'm making your favorite roasted chicken." He walked past the column at the end of the small bar, seeing her come into view. "Mrs. Kalvo dropped over a whole bunch of lemons she'd been growing in her garden so I decided to put them to use. She said little Tony's been bugging her about the next time you'll come over and baby sit him."

"Well it smells delicious." He said as he tossed his keys and wallet on the counter. Liam hunched over his mom and kissed her on the cheek, immediately feeling her lips turn into a smile.

"All that because I cooked your favorite meal?"

He shook his head, "I actually have something I want to talk to you about?"

Mrs. Holt set her iced tea down and turned towards her son, "So you finally opened it?" She smiled a bit, "You know when I checked the mail and saw something from a college with a New York address, I was about ready to leave it in the pile with all the other letters with wrong addresses. But then I saw that it was addressed to William Holt II and I almost couldn't believe it."

"I wanted to tell you." He said with sincerity. "I just didn't want to make it seem like I was eager to up and leave or that I was planning something that might not even happen."

She shushed her son who was about ready to break into one of his rambling fits that she knew so well. She placed a hand on his forearm, asking simply, "What did the letter say, Liam?"

"I got into Parsons School of Design, mom." He said, smiling at the fact, "It's this really great college for all types of art and creativity- it's smack dab in the middle of Manhattan. And they want me- they really want me to go there." He corrected himself, "I really want to go there."

"Oh honey, I'm so proud of you!" She said as she leaned over, cradling her boy like she did when he was just born. In that moment, she didn't know any of what life would deal to the two of them or what they'd have to go through in order to get to here. All she knew was that he was her son and she'd love him more than anyone could- and right now she was seeing that through.

Liam basked in the joy for a few minutes before reality came knocking at his door. He straightened himself back up, "Now I know that we can't afford it, but I'm going to make it happen." He took off, letting the plan formulate in his head, "I'll pick up some extra shifts at Sal's and add that money to the savings I already have. I'll start looking into any scholarship I'm eligible for and write as many essays as it takes."

Melissa cupped her hands over Liam's, containing all that worked up energy he exhausted whenever he latched onto an idea. "My sweet, sweet boy" she said, getting his attention. "College may not have been in your plans, but it's always been in the ones I made for you." Liam looked over at his mother, confused. She smiled, "When your father was taken away, I knew that I had to do whatever I could to make sure that you had the future you deserved. You didn't ask for any of this." She said, looking around at their small apartment and outdated furniture.

"I started putting away money every paycheck into a savings account in your name. It wasn't much at first but after all these years it's added up a bit." She looked into those piercing green eyes- the ones he'd inherited from herself, "It's been there all along- just waiting for you to decide what it is you wanted to do."

Liam leaned back into the couch, stunned. He tried to piece together any semblance of a sentence, "I-I can't believe this. You set this up all those years ago." He shook his head, "That money- you could have used it for all these other things-"

She corrected, "All of those other things were what we wanted, Liam. But this-" she reached for that letter and held it up, "You need to do this. You need to go out and make a life for yourself." Melissa Holt let a single tear roll down her face as he held onto his hands, "Even if it means you'll be leaving me."

Liam started to tear too. He hugged his mom as she started to stroke his back. "I'll always come back here- to you."

"I know you will, son."

"I-I can't thank you enough, mom" he said as he wiped the stray tears from his face.

Melissa did the same, sniffling away to composure. "You had to grow up a lot faster than kids your age are supposed to. And lately it feels like you're the parent and you're looking out for me." She placed a hand on his shoulder, "Go and see what's out there. There'll always be a home for you here."

***

A week later, Caleb was heading up the stairs of Liam's apartment building. He stopped at the small mirror that hung at the stair landing, fixing his hair and collar before walking down towards the door. He knocked, getting the smallest feeling of butterflies as he waited for the door to open- all this time later, he still got that same feeling whenever he saw Liam. It was the glint of those bright green eyes and the way his normally pouted face turned into a smile that made him feel like he was thirteen with the biggest crush he'd experienced.

Liam opened the door and crossed his arms as he stood at the doorway, "Mind telling me why you insisted on driving all the way here just so we can go back to have dinner in Lakeshore?" He asked in a teasing tone. "Or why you walked all the way up here to get me?"

Caleb simply shrugged. "I wanted to come up and give you this." He pulled out the bright pink box he'd stashed aside and handed it to the surprised boy. "Plus, we haven't had a date like this in so long that I wanted to make it special."

"Is this from-"

Caleb flipped the lid open, cutting the boy off. Liam looked down to see a small four inch cake- one that looked to be a scaled down version of the cake he brought for Caleb's birthday that first weekend. He leaned into the apartment, and set the box on the counter before pulling at Caleb's hands.

"Why are you being so cute tonight?" He asked as he thumbed at the boy's open palm. He found those shy brown eyes with blushing cheeks that couldn't hide behind the boy's caramel skin. "Not that I don't love it." He said, kissing at Caleb's cheek.

"Well last week, we got possibly the best news we could've asked for. My parents took me out to dinner that night and I know your mom did the same with you-" He pulled at Liam's buttoned shirt, smelling the scent of mint that wafted from his mouth. "but we never got to celebrate."

Liam kissed Caleb's lips then pulled off slightly so that their foreheads touched. He ran a finger against the boy's jaw, holding him by the open door for everyone to see. He smiled, "I don't think it's ever gonna go away."