Lessons Learned Ch. 01: The Class

"I didn't mean...I mean, I'm sure you'll do your share. Sorry." He practically tripped over his own tongue.

"Zach," I said firmly. "If we're going to be partners, the first thing you need to know about me is that I appreciate candor. I like people who are up front and don't have to be carried, unlike those toddlers you have to deal with." I jerked my head toward the hyena pack.

After taking down the names of the each partner group, Dr. B asked if we had any questions over the first two chapters, which we should have read on our own, he reminded us. People sat frozen, afraid to speak up. Rolling his eyes, he started that day's video.

More sex. More talk about sex. Close-ups of people's privates. Again, a clinical tape presented in a straightforward way, and yet, there was a certain tension that brewed in the room. An energy you could almost taste. People cleared their throats, found ways to avert their eyes while appearing to stare at the screen, or flat out stared hard, while again shifting in their seats.

At the end of class, I touched Zach's forearm and he turned to me reluctantly.

"Do you have another class after this?"

"No," he said hesitantly.

"I have a work study office in the library basement, if you want to come with me and talk about our research topic. Or if you don't want to do it today, maybe next week after class?"

"No! I mean, today is good, we don't have to wait until next week."

I led Zach, who spent the first part of the walk holding his backpack in front of him rather than wearing it on his back, to my little converted storage closet-slash-office space in the far recesses of the library basement. Seriously, it was like Phantom of the Opera down there.

I had been given an extremely neglected and out of the way little office for my digital archiving project. My job was to collect books or other documents that the librarian or professors selected, bring them down to my little windowless space to scan, and convert them to digital form, before returning them to be shelved. Mostly I worked undisturbed and utterly forgotten down in the basement. Even the janitor only came by once a month at most. I chose my own hours and had my own key. There was a small bathroom nearby, but the vending machines I relied on for sustenance were a considerable distance away, on the opposite side of the basement. To get to my corner of the world, I had to make my way down a dank, poorly lit hallway. I explained it all to Zach as we walked.

"Wow," he said, when I let him into my glorious former storage room. It was now furnished with an old heavy wooden desk, a computer and scanner set up in the corner, a crappy office chair that should have seen the landfill ages ago, and two plain wooden student chairs that were piled with work to scan. I'd brought a lamp from home to provide some extra light to my windowless world.

"Yeah. It's actually kind of nice. It's quiet, since no one ever comes down here and bugs me. I like that. I have introvert issues." I grinned as I cleared off a chair for him.

I got Zach seated next to me at the desk with our textbooks open, perusing the table of contents to find a subject of interest to us both. That was too general, so we began to flip through the pages, each lost to our own search. I sensed him slowly tensing and, once again using my peripheral vision, saw him adjusting himself in his Dockers, but he had whatever he was packing well hidden. He seemed to be very experienced at that, anyway.

"Hey, Zach?" I said quietly, not looking at him.

"Hmmm?"

"I'd really like for us to be friends. And one thing I like in my friends is being open and honest with them. But also, you know, being able to count on their confidentiality. I'm a pretty private person in general. Except with my good friends. And I choose them carefully." At this, I looked up to meet his eyes. "I feel like maybe you could be trustworthy. Like maybe we could talk plainly together. Especially since we seem to be faced with some rather sensitive material." I gave him a slightly crooked grin. "Could we do that, Zach? Could we be friends like that?"

"Yeah," he whispered.

"Could you try not to feel embarrassed with me? Just talk to me about anything you want? Ask me anything you want? I'd like it if you would."

"Yeah," he whispered again, licking his lips nervously.

"Zach," I paused and set my hand on the top of his thigh, which twitched slightly at my touch. "Are you aroused right now?"

His eyes jerked away from mine, and he stared sightlessly at the textbook. He licked his lips again, and I could see him struggling with how to answer. A slow flush crept up his neck.

"Yeah," he said finally, and although he wouldn't look at me, he didn't pull away from my hand.

"Could I see it?" I asked quietly, and this time his eyes flew to mine, in evident shock. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. "I know you're shy. I just don't want you to feel embarrassed with me. We're going to have to work together this semester. We're going to be sitting next to each other in class. I don't know about you, but I find class...very, uh, difficult in some ways. I know it's supposed be a serious field, but it's so fucking hot." His lips parted slightly as he continued to stare at me. "I'm an adult woman, Zach. I've been married, divorced. I've had men, and even one woman, but it turns out that's not my thing." I watched him swallow hard. "I'm not ashamed of anything I've done. Anyway, I think maybe you aren't as experienced as you might like to be, so I wondered if maybe you'd like to have someone you could, ummm, talk to about it. Sex. Women. Relationships." I squeezed his thigh lightly. "Erections. Fantasies. Desire. Whatever."

He swallowed again and closed his eyes, shutting me out for a moment.

"Are you...are you making fun of me?"

"What? No! Why would you think that?"

"Girls, uh, women, don't talk to me. They...they aren't interested in me. I'm not cute, or hot, or whatever it is they like. I'm not buff, and I'm, I'm... a geek. Girls don't like nerds."

"I happen to like nerds." I kept my hand on his thigh. "I'm not making fun of you. I don't have any shady motives. I just thought you might like the chance to, well, benefit from my experience, but if you want to say no, it's okay. We'll just do our research paper and forget this conversation if that's what you want. I promise I will never bring it up again. I'll never tell anyone, and I'll just act like it never happened."

"I, uh, I, yes, I would like that."

Hiding my disappointment, I started to withdraw my hand.

"No!" he blurted, "I meant, I would like to be friends. Ones who, who talk and stuff, like you said."

I settled my hand on him again.

"I have an idea about our research paper, too. I think we should concentrate on Chapter Ten, "Techniques of Arousal and Communication", and maybe find a focus like how studies on open communication about sex can positively impact relationships. Why don't you think about it and let me know next week, maybe come back with a couple of topic ideas of your own to discuss. What do you think?"

"I like it," he said, eyes darting around my office space, looking for something else to stare at while he talked. Unfortunately for him, there was nothing but bare walls. "I think it sounds like a really, uhhh, good topic."

We talked a bit more then, with me reading the chapter subtopics to him, and feeling the tension in him increase as I did.

"Zach?"

"Yeah?" His voice was badly strained by now.

"Will you show me your erection? Or would you rather keep this to just a research paper with a friend you can sometimes talk openly to and stuff?"

There was a silence as he considered my request. I watched his index finger absently tracing random designs on his textbook.
"You really want that?"

"Yes."

He pushed his chair back a bit, causing my hand fell away from his thigh. He started to reach towards his crotch with both hands, but I stopped him.

"Stand up," I said softly. "It'll be more comfortable."

He stood, and as he did, his clothes were no longer able to hide the bulge in his pants. The very impressive bulge in his pants. My mouth suddenly went dry. What was this kid packing?

I considered offering to help him, as his shaking fingers began unbuttoning his pants, but I wanted him to do this. We had turned so that we faced each other rather than the desk.

"Should I, do you want me to take my pants all the way off?"

"Just pull them down a bit. And try not to hide it in your shirt, okay?" He gave a short bark of nervous laughter.

His pants came down to his the middle of his thighs. His boxers tented out in front of him and he tucked his shirt against his stomach and clumsily tugged down his boxers.

His huge erection sprang out, seemingly relieved to have been freed from its confines.

"Oh my god," I breathed, a surge of desire beginning in my core. My panties had been damp, starting in class, then continuing while I'd sat discussing all this with Zach. His eyes found mine, an undecipherable expression on his face/ I hoped he couldn't see the hunger he had sparked inside of me. "You have a beautiful penis, Zach." I realized that might sound a bit stupid, but I was really impressed, and, honestly, it was the most beautiful cock I'd ever seen.

The engorged head was smooth and a thick drop of precum danced on the tip as it oozed from his slit. Everything about his cock was perfectly shaped and proportioned. The shaft was veined, but not so heavily that it looked like it needed to be ironed, the way some some did. He had to be at least 10" erect. Not only was it long, it was thick, with a wide head. His balls were large, and hung heavily below his rod, with only a light smattering of pubic hair visible on them.

"Can I touch it?" I asked, a bit breathlessly to tell the truth.

"Y-yes," he stammered, and I saw it twitch in response to my request.

Moving slowly, I ran my fingertips over the head lightly, drawing a choked moan from Zach as I did. More precum oozed out, and I smeared it over the glans and around the crown. I wasn't lying to Zach. His cock was beautiful, and I was reveling in the experience. I grasped the upper shaft firmly, my fingertips barely able to meet around the girth of it. I gave him a light squeeze, and he began to breathe more heavily. I stroked him very slowly, down to the base and up again.

"Brinna, I-," he began, and I knew what was about to happen. I saw his balls contract and I felt his cock twitch in my hand. His hips jerked and he gave a low cry as he came abruptly. A thick ropey jet of cum shot out of the tip as I watched, fascinated. It actually shot all the way over my shoulder to splatter on the floor behind my chair as a second pulsing jet landed on my thigh, and a third, not as powerful, splashed onto Zach's shirt. A fourth, and final, pulse drooled over the tip and ran over my closed fist. Zach groaned at the strength of his release. I looked up to see his hands fisted at his side, his eyes closed tightly. His lips were parted, his breathing still heavy. I stroked his rigid shaft gently, the cum offering a slippery ride for my hand.

He opened his eyes and I saw the humiliation spread over his face. He jerked away from me, ashamed and clumsy, turning to stuff himself back into his clothing.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I'll go, I'll just go," he said in a rush, on the verge of tears.

"Zach," I soothed, standing and reaching my dry hand for his shoulder. "Stop. Stop for a minute."

"I'll go," he repeated, and I heard the touch of anger in his voice. "I didn't mean-I'll clean it up, just don't. Don't look at me."

"Zach," I said, gently pleading, "please just sit down. It's okay, it's all okay. It's my fault, I shouldn't have pushed you that far. Please don't go." I grasped his upper arm and he stilled suddenly, though he kept his head turned away from me. "I wanted—I liked it," I said lamely. "I don't mind. I liked it. I like you. We said we'd be honest friends, remember?"

I got him to lean back against the desk, reassuring him over and over that it was alright.

"Let me get some towels from the bathroom and we'll clean up. But please stay. Wait for me to get back, and we'll talk. Promise you'll stay?"

I saw his jaw clench stubbornly for a minute.

"Yeah, okay, fine," he ground out.

Reminding him I'd be right back, I skipped out to go to the small bathroom so I could get some paper towels.

I worried he would slip out while I was gone, but he kept his word and waited for me to return with a pile of both damp and dry paper towels. He was still not willing to meet my eyes, so I let him clean himself up while I took care of the floor. I'd quickly cleaned myself while in the bathroom.

He finally stopped fussing with his clothing, and tossed the soiled paper towels in my small trash can. I took his hand and tugged him back to his chair, albeit with some resistance.

He rested his folded arms on my desk and buried his face in them. Without speaking, I rubbed Zach's shoulders gently for a few moments, until I felt some of the tension drain from his back. I stilled my hand.

"Zach," I said gently, "I know you didn't want that to happen like that, but I promised to be honest with you. That was one of the sexiest things I've ever experienced. Thank you."

He took a deep breath, then another, staying silent.

"Have you ever had sex?" I asked.

"Kinda." He cleared his throat. "There was a girl during my sophomore year here. I was at a party. I didn't even really want to be there, but my advisor said I should try to be more social. She took me to her dorm room. We didn't really make out much, just kissed a little. She had me put on a condom. It was uncomfortable."

"It was probably too small. I mean, you really need to get the ones made for men like you."

"Like me?"

"Big. Big like you are." I paused. "You do know you have a really big, um, penis, right?"

"I guess?" he said uncertainly. "That's what the girl told me. We started to, you know, do it, but I could only get it about halfway inside and she started saying I didn't know what I was doing. I got nervous. More nervous, I guess. She grabbed me, you know, by the part still outside, and she started to squeeze, and I came."

"I've been thinking about something since we met," I said, and started to slowly rub his shoulders again. "Do you know what women like best about men?"

"No," he replied, slightly petulant.

"Confidence. Confident men are sexy. They carry themselves differently. Confidence, but not arrogance. You're a smart guy, Zach. Smart is sexy, too. And whether you know it or not, you have what we women like to call a hell of a package on you. What you don't have is confidence."

"I'm not good looking."

"Well, I mean you aren't Brad Pitt, sure, but you aren't ugly. I actually think you're cute. But you're also nice. And nice guys don't have to finish last."

He finally looked at me, distrust still evident in his face.

"I have a proposal for you. A research proposal. Our own private research." I leaned toward him. "I want to help you gain some confidence. I want to turn you into the sexiest damn nerd on campus." I smiled into his eyes. "I want to teach you how to make yourself last, until you're ready. I want to teach you what pleases women and how to turn us into jelly. I want to see if helping you be better at sex makes you more confident in other things. You're shy, I know. You blush so easily." As if to prove my point, he went light pink. "But you can still attract women. In fact, I think they might even flock to you." He snorted in disbelief. "I want you to be my sexual research partner, Zach. I want to experiment with you, if you'll let me."

Another pause as he mulled over what must have been a pretty shocking proposal from his point of view. But really, a cock that beautiful should not be hidden away from the world, I reasoned with myself, justifying my unusual suggestion. I really didn't spend my life making lewd proposals to near strangers.

"What do you get out of it?"

"I'm too busy to date much," I said bluntly. "I need someone I can be with here on campus, without complications. It'll just be a project, between friends. Fuck buddies, if you will. But nothing more. We won't call each other, or go out, or see each other outside of class, nothing outside this room. It'll be good for me too. I have needs, Zach. Sometimes masturbating just doesn't do enough, you know?"
He flushed, and I smiled at him.

"Are you interested?"

to be continued