All Comments on 'Let Him Cry Pt. 03'

5 stars! I like how you are continuing this story. You introduced women and let him weed his way through them. He was working through some issues and was able to find the right one eventually. This story will get better when he gets to meet the mother and dad. I'm sure you have some fireworks ready for that one. I hope you enjoy writing this as much as I enjoy reading it. Thanks for your time and Imagination.

I like the character development in this story. The author obviously put some effort into making this real. I appreciate that.

Well, there's a humanity in this story (so far) that feels lived-in. All of us know loss, to one degree or another, so when reading about someone who is going through the throes of loss, there's a universality in the story. It also makes it extremely obvious when someone is faking it. I read this and think, "yup, this guy has taken a few lumps".

Matt's journey through this story rings very familiar. The timelines, the slow steps, the rawness of all of the senses. I'm back in my own times, reliving my own process.

You also do it with an economy of words, while letting the characters breathe and expand at their own rate; which is no easy feat.

That said, I do have a gripe. Sorry, but every woman in this story seems to be an annoying ballbuster. I've complemented you in other stories for writing strong women characters, but it's taken to a bit of an extreme in this aspect. From Ruth on down, they're laying on "the banter", non-stop. After a while, it's neither funny, nor seemingly really appropriate for a man in his position - trying to get his feet under him and then back in the dating world. We know - "all men are clueless in relationships" - just ask my ex (any one of them). But the near constant hammering from Tatyanna through the old bat Ruth?

Sure, men give it to each other all the time. But that's after a camaraderie is established. These women are on him from the get-go; he doesn't even know half their names and they're riding him. And when they do "know" him (and through excellent storytelling, it's clear that none of them really do), it's like a open-mic night at a Friars Roast, except none of them have any material. I get it - it's a construction site, ya gotta be manly and crack wise. But, I really wish Matt would simply refuse to engage half the time. Just a look can be the most effective "fuck off with that noise". The rare time he deals back? Most of them sulk and run away. With the exception of Ruth (herself a caricature of the "plain-talkin', truth-tellin' elder" without an "OFF" switch), they give fine, but when they get? Oh, invest in Kleenex, cuz the tears are a-flowin' like the Schuylkill. TBH, Bela was insufferable for 75% of this chapter. If she wasn't smirking and snide, she was sullen and miserable. She must be smoking hot, cuz I wouldn't want anything to do with such a headcase. For me it made it very difficult to empathize with her character in any way. The "date rapist" insinuation was not too far; it's what I took away from her comments as well. Isabela, Queen of the Bad Takes.

Otherwise, this story makes me sad there aren't more stories published by you on this website. rawness of all of the senses. I'm back in my own times, reliving my own process.

You also do it with an economy of words, while letting the characters breathe and expand at their own rate; which is no easy feat.

That said, I do have a gripe. Sorry, but every woman in this story seems to be an annoying ballbuster. I've complemented you in other stories for writing strong women characters, but it's taken to a bit of an extreme in this aspect. From Ruth on down, they're laying on "the banter", non-stop. After a while, it's neither funny, nor seemingly really appropriate for a man in his position - trying to get his feet under him and then back in the dating world. We know - "all men are clueless in relationships" - just ask my ex (any one of them). But the near-constant hammering from Tatyanna through the old bat Ruth?

Sure, men give it to each other all the time. But that's after a camaraderie is established. These women are on him from the get-go; he doesn't even know half their names and they're riding him. And when they do "know" him (and through excellent storytelling, it's clear that none of them really do), it's like an open-mic night at a Friars Roast, except none of them have any material. I get it - it's a construction site, ya gotta be manly and crack wise. But, I really wish Matt would simply refuse to engage half the time. Just a look can be the most effective "fuck off with that noise". The rare time he deals back? Most of them sulk and run away. With the exception of Ruth (herself a caricature of the "plain-talkin', truth-tellin' elder" without an "OFF" switch), they give fine, but when they get? Oh, invest in Kleenex, cuz the tears are a-flowin' like the Schuylkill. TBH, Bela was insufferable for 75% of this chapter. If she wasn't smirking and snide, she was sullen and miserable. She must be smoking hot, cuz I wouldn't want anything to do with such a headcase. For me it made it very difficult to empathize with her character in any way. The "date rapist" insinuation was not too far; it's what I took away from her comments as well. Isabela, Queen of the Bad Takes.

Otherwise, this story makes me sad there aren't more stories published by you on this website.

It seems as if most comments from all the women he engages with are them busting his balls. I wouldn't have put up with a small fraction of the shit he puts up with from women he barely even knows.

It's as if he has a sticker on his head that says, "I like to be abused. Please bust my balls." This guy has some serious issues he needs to work on. In the very beginning of my interactions with Caitlyn I would have told her to back off and make sure she heard and understood.

You are an excellent writer and I gave you five stars, but I almost quite reading this chapter. The dialogue is getting pretty old.

Still a winner!

Thanks. This is a fun ride to be on. I love the characters coming to life. They seem really real except I think you had your tongue in your cheek with the old lady. That is not a criticism, she's really fun to read. I've read some of the other comments and I understand what they're saying about the women busting on Matt but I guess I see it differently. Caitlin IS a ballbuster I'll give you that. Taty is just short and sarcastic with everyone but I notice she never actually gets on Matt's case. Bela is playful except for that one moment and I think there's more to that story that we haven't heard. Yes? And I've already mentioned that I think Ruth is just in there for fun. Good job. I hope you'll write more.

awesome! sorry, the new template will not register my 5 star vote

The tension is thick, between Matt’s brooding, Bella’s angst, and Olivia’s lingering ghost. Not to mention Bella’s old world parents. Onward to the conclusion.

This guy puts up with a lot more than I would've. And he doesn't have to: it's not like all women are as neurotic as the chicks in this story. They all get together to gossip and talk smack during their lunch hour - and they move the poor bastard from the 'handsome and sexy' category to 'douchebag rapist'. And when he doesn't have any idea what's changed, all the women cluck about how men are so 'clueless'.

The story is well-written, but I'm beginning to believe this guy is too wimpy to make a good husband for anyone.

"Hello. My name is Isabel Navarro. You killed my coffee shop. Prepare to die."

I did laugh out loud! Thank you!!

great character descriptions, and story. Sort of thought Matt and Taty might become a couple but this is better. Still need to clear the air with Catlyn and maybe Taty gets a BF that stops by to see Matt doing schoolwork with her kids and wonders? New businesses, both, will be hard.

Half the time I couldn't understand what was going on. The rest of the time was monotonous and boring.

The women in this story are driving it into the ground. It's becoming a teen angst show. Blech.

Poor guy he seems to have the knack for picking 1 a crazy lady 2 a woman that is driving him crazy I really hoped bela wasn’t gonna have that vibe