All Comments on 'Lisa's Dirty Panties'

Good story. Short and to the point. Definitely would benefit from grammar work; but if you can get through that, it was a nice short stroker.

Can't wait to read how tomorrow goes.

Beef purse....was not something I wanted to read

But I'll pass on the gay anal crap...

"Lisa could grace the cover of men,s magazine easily" might read more comfortably as 'could easily grace...'

"Mom and dad where out of town" Where out of town were they?

"this time just in her panties" I suggest 'in just her panties.'

When Lisa leaned back, it would have been Lisa leant back. Lent of

Lent is what you will do with cash whenever Lisa needs some cash.

The sentance "As Lisa continued to grind ..."became too long and the topic changed to her pussy collapsing on you. Two shorter sentences would more clearly defined that which you intended.

Comments aside, this is an extremely fine story. I could imagine this young beauty as a waitress, garnering abundant tips from patrons. Hankering for personal involvement from someone steady, not a customer. You lucky bastard !

There are a few things you need to understand. One is that DD breasts are never perky. Boobs are almost all fat cells with the only muscles being above and below. The reason women get a lift is because big boobs are not perky. The second thing is perky is a much overused word. It is never used in conversation so why would everyone want to use it in fiction? Use your imagination or some form of research to increase your vocabulary. It will do nothing but make you a better writer.

You are the king of run-on sentences; an expert at mixing tenses in a single sentence; a person who knows not the difference between where and were. I can't believe I once thought the British were masters of the English language. Perhaps you aren't British. Before your next attempt at writing you should get a basic understanding of grammar. By the way, in what world are DD breasts considered perky? Kind of like a massive 3" dick?