Little Man

Warning of minor short scenes of attempted sexual assault that some may find disturbing.

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My freshman year of college was supposed to be a new start for me. I chose the furthest university that would accept me and planned to leave my past life for good. For a bit everything seemed like it would turn out great, but even when it seems everything changes some things will always stay the same.

I've always been rather small, hitting puberty much later than any of my peers and even then, not experiencing much of a growth spurt. I reached 5'3" before my doctor told me I was just about done growing, and whereas all my peers had their voices deepen and their body hair thicken, I was left with a rather high-pitched trill and little hair beyond pubic hair, which I always kept trimmed or shaved.

I kept myself in shape, but no matter how hard I tried I was never able to develop any noticeable muscle, leaving me thin and soft. Needless to say, I was never exactly popular with the girls, and I was an easy target for any of the guys who felt the need to flex their masculinity a bit and pick on the wimpy kid. I was mostly able to grin and bear it, but one incident in my senior year of high school made me realize I had to get as far away as possible.

As you might expect from somebody who looks like me, I'm not exactly very well-endowed. At my absolute hardest I only measure somewhere around three and a half inches, and unfortunately, I would say I'm a bit of a grower, so in my flaccid state my penis is barely a nub. I had always done my best to hide this fact, thinking it best to keep at least any hint of masculinity that I might have had, which made the gym showers quite difficult to navigate. I usually got away with going in after everyone else by wasting time helping the coach pick up after class, which also earned me a few brownie points with him and put me on his good side. Fortunately, I managed to keep this up until near the end of my senior year.

However, one day I casually mentioned to him an exam that I had in my next class, and he insisted I hit the showers and get there as quickly as I could. Despite my protests he wouldn't take no for an answer, so I sulked to locker room, dreading what was about to happen. I got to my locker, luckily tucked away in a corner out of sight of the shower heads, and quickly stripped down to a towel. I was hoping to wait it out a little longer in my corner, praying nobody would notice me, but one of my more athletic peers soon turned the corner and saw me lurking.

"Wohoho, looks like Alex is actually gonna be joining us in the showers today! Come on, little man, you can't just stand there all day!" His voice was boisterous, ensuring everyone else in the locker room knew I was there. I reluctantly followed him, deciding it would just be easier to face a wall in the shower rather than try to explain why I was hiding. He walked behind me, firmly pushing me towards the shower heads where everyone was waiting. When I turned the corner I paused, unable to believe what I was seeing.

A consequence of me always avoiding the showers was that I had never actually seen any of my peers nude, only ever seeing another penis in porn. A part of my mind had convinced myself that I might not have been that small, and that the ones I would see in porn are simply exceptions, but what I saw before me quickly dashed that illusion. Even the smallest among them was easily three or four times my size, and some of the larger ones seemed utterly absurd to me. I had never thought about men before, and even then, I didn't see them in a sexual manner, but I simply couldn't pull my eyes away from their penises. In my stupor I felt a hand tug the towel around my waist. "No towels in the showers, bud, you know the rules." The hand of the boy behind me pulled my towel away, leaving me standing nude in front of everyone.

At first, there was a silence that seemed to drag for minutes, though I suspect it was only a few seconds. Before long, I began to hear laughter, subdued chuckles at first, but when my usher passed, he unabashedly spoke; "whoa, I guess you really are a little man after all!" This broke the seal, and suddenly everyone was outright laughing. Even those who had always been nice to me struggled to stifle their laughter. I felt my face turn beet red, and I quickly grabbed my towel from the ground and ran back to my locker. The nickname "little man" suddenly had a new meaning after that day.

--

Like I said, though, this year would be different. Nobody I knew from high school went to this university, which made sense based on the exorbitant price they were charging for out of state. Fortunately, my parents were extremely generous with my college fund so I could pay the tuition with only some relatively minor student loans. For the first time in a long time I actually felt confident and optimistic, and I went into orientation with an entirely new outlook on life. My mood was only made better when I was informed that my expected roommate had suddenly declined his admission, leaving me with a double room entirely to myself, at least for my first semester. A small part of me thought that this would be a godsend for picking up girls, but I didn't want to get too overconfident and quickly pushed that thought aside.

The rest of the orientation day seemed to drag on, but I wasn't about to let anything sour my mood. Everybody seemed friendly and not once did I get any diminutive comments, something I wasn't used to yet. During one of the lectures about alcohol awareness or something or other I found my mind drifting, absent mindedly doodling in my notebook which was entirely devoid of notes. The guy sitting next to me, Sam, took notice and started talking to me about what I was drawing, and I soon found myself explaining to him all the random characters and stories I had come up with in my mind. As I spoke in hushed tones, trying not to alert the lecturer, he just listened with a genuine interest that I had not received from many people before. As we talked, I found out that he would be living on the same floor as me, only a few rooms down. The lecture ended and we parted ways as his schedule lead him somewhere else, but he let me know we would catch up later. I had made my first friend so easily. Things really were going to be different this year.

However, when I was finally escorted to my dorm, I finally had something to pull me down from my high. The RA lead me to my room, the bags that I had left in the lobby earlier already sitting on the bed, and then gave me a brief tour of the building. There was a common area, the lobby, a few small classrooms in the basement, and finally as he was leading me back to my room, he stopped to show me the bathroom. The door opened to a standard looking public restroom, with a row of stalls and a corresponding sink in front of each. Directly to the right of the door, however, was a cheap plastic curtain, which when pushed aside made my heart sink.

Along the walls were a row of communal shower heads, almost identical to those in my high school locker room. I asked the RA if there were private showers anyway, but he just gave a rehearsed wince and let me know this was it. "Don't worry though!" he said in an artificially cheerful tone. "Everyone usually gets used to it in a few days and then doesn't mind at all!" I feigned acceptance of his reassurance, but the only thing running through my mind were the flashbacks of that day in the showers.

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The first week of classes went by better than I could have imagined. I enjoyed most of the courses I was taking, save for the science lab I had to take as a gen-ed, and all the professors seemed great. I still hadn't decided a major, but after just a week of taking an art elective I was already leaning in that direction. After classes I usually met up with a couple of the guys from my floor and a few girls from the floor below and had dinner in the dining hall. Nobody had known each other for long at that point so a lot of the conversations mostly ended up as small talk, but it was still fun to have people to talk to duringdinner.

That being said, I hit it off right away with Sam, the guy I had met during orientation, and I already knew I had found my best friend. I would talk to him about my art and writing ideas, drawing up characters while he watched intently. He played on the school's tennis team, getting recruited on a scholarship, and he would always talk about practice, constantly trying to explain to me the scoring system that I could never seem to grasp. We seemed to have almost the exact same sense of humor, which really made conversation easier despite our different interests. Sam was a pretty big guy, easily 6'2" and he kept himself fit for his athletics. I know it made me look even smaller in comparison when we hung out, but I was secretly happy to be friends with somebody like him, thinking he might provide me some sort of protection from anybody looking for somebody smaller to pick on.

Even dorm life seemed to be going smoothly, for the most part. There were a couple of guys I didn't think I would get along with, but they seemed to form their own little clique pretty quickly which prevented too much crossover with the people I was trying to hang out with. The RA would always set up game nights as a way for people to get to know each other, and while expected most people to scoff at the idea everyone seemed very open to it. My sleep schedule got a little skewed, but that was mostly because of my shower schedule.

I knew I couldn't just avoid taking a shower all together, so I decided I would just take one late every night, after I assumed most people would be in bed, or at least not about to shower. Living in my room alone made this even easier, as I didn't have to worry about disturbing anybody late at night. I shockingly easily got used to this schedule, taking naps during the day if I felt overly tired, and I even began to enjoy my late-night private showers. There was something freeing about having an entire communal shower to myself in a way that I never quite experienced in the gym locker room. Whereas then I would always have to rush to get to class, in the dorm showers I could take my time and have an actually relaxing shower.

This routine continued without a hitch until the second Saturday of the school year. I suppose during the first weekend people weren't quite ready to start partying yet, but by the second weekend everyone must have decided to let loose a little. Even I had gone to a small dorm party which Sam had heard about the night before, something I didn't have much, or any, experience with from high school.

On Saturday, though, I decided to have an early night as the next day I would be meeting my parents who were making the trip in to drop off some things I had forgotten at home. I went for my shower around 2:30, a little early for me but I thought it would be late enough. However, very shortly after I started my shower, I heard the bathroom door open, and quickly the thin plastic curtain was thrown open. Into the room stepped three of the guys I hadn't spoken to much, clearly drunk from a party they must have come from, stumbling and laughing as they entered. They all wore towels, their hair visibly wet and the smell of beer permeating the air. They didn't seem to notice me at first.

As soon as they entered, I quickly turned to face the corner, trying to hide my front as best I could. My towel was hanging on a hook by the curtain, so I couldn't easily cover myself without making it obvious I was hiding. I figured they were distracted enough, though, and tried to just sneak away without them noticing. However, my sudden motion must have drawn their attention, and the one who seemed to lead the other two looked at me, startled.

"What the fuck, you scared the shit out of me, dude! I didn't even see you standing there! What are you doing in here so late, were you at the rush, too?" He started to walk towards me as he spoke.

"N...no, I just got caught up with some work and lost track of time. Taking a shower before bed." I awkwardly faced the wall as I talked to him over my shoulder.

"You're doing work on a Saturday? Fuuuuuck that!" His friends laughed at his comment. "Your name was, uh, Andrew, right? No, Alex! That was it. I don't think we've gotten to know each other. Why the fuck are you looking away like that? Don't be shy, dude, you're gonna have to get used to other guys seeing you sooner or later." With that, he grabbed my shoulder and spun me around, easily manipulating my small frame. We both seemed to have the same reaction when I fully turned, our heads looking down to the other's crotch. I saw just enough to know that he too was far larger than me, as I could have expected. My hands shot down to my crotch, but not fast enough to prevent him from getting a look.

"Oh shit, now I see why you were shy, that thing is tiny! Guys, you gotta come check this out," he said, reaching his hands out and grabbing my wrists, pulling them away from my crotch. He laughed aloud when he got another look. His two friends stumbled over, seemingly overly eager to get a look at what was so funny. As soon as they got to either side of him, finally revealing my body before them, they both keeled over laughing. I struggled against his grip, hoping to break free and make a run for my towel, but he was much stronger than I was. I locked my eyes shut, hoping that would somehow take me out of this moment, but it did nothing to block out their laughter.

"Listen man, I'm sorry, but that's just the smallest dick I've ever seen. Like we've been giving Josh some shit because we thought he was small, but he's like a monster compared to you! Open your eyes, look." I don't know why, but I listened to him and opened my eyes. Maybe I thought that if I listened, I could just get this over with. He gestured to the guy on his left, presumably Josh, who was grabbing the base of his dick and twirling it around, making strange grunting noises as he did so. Apparently, this display was amusing for the trio, as it got them laughing once again. In the midst of their laughing fit the shower curtain flung open.

Standing at the entrance in lounge pants, slippers, and no shirt, was Sam, his toiletries in hand. He must have heard the commotion as he was coming to get ready for bed. The sudden sound stopped the laughter of my three assailants, and they all looked to see who it was. My hands were still held in place above my head.

"Holy shit, Randy, let him go! What the fuck are you doing!?" Sam dropped what he was holding and rushed towards us. From his angle I knew he had a clear view of me. I know he saw me. I know he saw all of me. The guy holding my hands, who I assume was Randy, let me go, stepping away as Sam came up on him. I didn't hesitate a moment, and immediately ran for the door, grabbing my towel on the way and quickly wrapping it around my waist. "Wait, no, Alex, wait a second!" I heard Sam call as I ran down the hall and into my room, locking the door behind me.

Everything seemed to have come crashing down around me. I was so optimistic, I thought things were actually going to be different now, but I was just stupid and naïve. I almost didn't mind Randy and his goons seeing me, I dealt with bullies before and maybe I would have been able to do it again. Maybe it would have just been a one-time thing that started a few rumors, but nothing more. But it wasn't just Randy and them who saw me. Sam saw me. What would he think of me now? Seeing me like that, pinned up against the wall, totally nude and helpless, my penis fully on display. I was pathetic! I knew he would be just like the others from before, he wouldn't be able to respect me as a friend, I would just be a joke to him. As my mind raced, I heard a knock on my door.

"Hey Alex, are you in there? Can we talk for a minute?" I heard Sam's voice through the door. There was no way I could open it; I knew he was just there to mock me. I just crawled into my bed and tried to pretend to be asleep. I realized that I had tears streaming down my face. I tried to stifle my cries so he wouldn't hear me. Another knock.

"Well we'll talk tomorrow, okay? I already talked to Randy and them, hopefully they won't bother you anymore, but please let me know if they do. I won't tell the RA yet, I'll let you decide that. So, goodnight. Please talk to me tomorrow." I heard his footsteps fade down the hall. Once I heard the door close, knowing he was in his room, I began to openly sob. I don't remember when I got to sleep that night, if I even did at all.

--

The next week or two felt like navigating a mine field. I never ended up talking to Sam afterwards; in fact, I tried my best to avoid him like the plague. I just couldn't bring myself to face him, almost as if I didn't hear what he had to say I can live in a world like before he saw me. That didn't stop him from trying though, knocking on my door every night after I had locked myself away, trying to get my attention.

I started to shut out most of the people I had met since I got to the dorm. A few would greet me in the halls and try to start a conversation as I tried to sneak back to my room unnoticed, but I did my best to look busy and shut down any sort of chat. I figured they all already knew what happened, Randy didn't seem like the type to keep his mouth shut. Honestly, I don't think I cared as much as I thought I would. I had gotten so used to trying to avoid attention before that I simply fell back into the routine, not caring about those around me yet still a slave to what they thought of me. I found that the only real challenge was trying to ignore Sam's knocks every night.

My social life wasn't the only thing that started to suffer. Needless to say, I became more wary of the showers after what happened, and so I risked taking one only about every other day. I took them even later at night, too, even further ruining my sleep schedule. It wasn't far into the semester, but I could already tell my grades were slipping due to my lack of sleep. I figured as long as I could maintain passing grades and keep slipping under the radar, I would be able to make it through just fine. After a while I almost felt like I settled into the low I had found myself, feeling uncomfortably comfortable with this new norm.

That is until I came back to my dorm one day to find an opaque plastic bag hanging on my door handle. I grabbed the bag as I entered the room and gently tossed it on my bed as I turned to lock the door. I looked inside, expecting some sort of foul garbage as a prank, but was met with something even worse. I pulled out a slip of paper, haphazardly torn from a notebook, signed by Randy.

"Hey there, little fella, long time no see! Have you been avoiding me? Well to make it up for you, here's a little gift. Some girl left it in my room, but I honestly can't even remember who to return it. Figured it would look good on somebody like you. After all, you're gonna have to get used to wearing stuff like this when you finally accept your place. You'll have to give me and the boys a little fashion show sometime."

My hands started to shake as I read the letter. I had managed to entirely avoid Randy since it happened, but it seemed like he hadn't forgotten me. I let the note fall to the floor and gingerly reached into the bag, my fingers being met with the feeling of silk. I grabbed hold of the fabric, pulling it out to reveal a long, black, thigh-high silk sock, followed by another that I grabbed after. I kept exploring the contents of the bag, next finding a lacey black bra clearly designed for somebody with a small chest. I could feel my face turn bright red despite being alone in my room, and I reached for the final item: black lace panties with a small slit at the crotch.