All Comments on 'Living Doll'

It's certainly different. Kinda feel like a better story would be what happened to the dolls. Minds stay the same and the personalities change. That could leave for some interesting things.

Well, in a universe where TZ could be more explicit. Seriously, enjoyed this. Not many stories on here grab you on the first line and take you for a ride like this one. Good work.

Good writing, but left wanting more.. what does she feel like when the process is complete? What happens to her? Does she meet other dolls? Chapter 2?!

I liked the non-explicit build-up. But I'm left wanting more. It would have been nice for her to keep her mind and narrate how she's used when the transformation's over.

The comment about overpopulation wasn't in the first half of the conversation. I don't think.

As with everything of yours that I’ve read it’s very clever, disturbingly accurate on the over population of the planet. I’ve heard that “sex dolls” are a thing, an off shoot of TPE perhaps?

Poor girl had freaky abusive parents or possibly just a freaky abusive mother and spineless father. I’d like to think that parents wouldn’t encourage or push that kind of thing but there are an awful lot of weirdos out there.

Still your story actually provides inadvertent hope for the future no sign of totalitarian states processing their contemporaries into sex dolls against their will. The description of Mr Alien made me chuckle a little it made me think of the David Tennant version of Dr Who, that puts a whole new spin on that programme!

Tess (UK)

I feel like the first half of the story was very well done. I was appalled at the misery Barbie was going through. I felt that her decision to end it all was a bit abrupt, but the detail she put into ensuring she didn't survive the jump did help patch the damaged suspension of disbelief for me.

The second half of the story, where she is taken by Mr Alien is where the story quality really felt like it went way downhill. For someone who has been trying to escape being this Barbie doll, she certainly accepts becoming a living sex doll in a damn hurry. I suppose a bit of that could be put down to not wanting to live anymore, but I really imagine that the character as described in the first half of the story would violently reject the idea of becoming a doll simply because of a lifetime of trying to escape that life.

Partly, I felt like the dollification process was quickly glossed over, but on the other hand it was always going to be deus ex machina macguffinery and handwavium anyhow. From that perspective, and knowing that you don't usually write doll stories, I can certainly accept the very short doll conversion scene.

Overall, I feel like you took an immensely strong and very well written beginning concept, and then tossed the dollification on at the end with sort of a "meh" flair. I get it, if you aren't into writing doll stories I don't expect you to write doll stories. Just... I really felt empathy for the Barbie character. I know we're all gathered here today to watch this fictional character have bad things happen to them. I guess I had hoped that the really strong characterization would flow through into the end of the story more smoothly than it did. I would really love to see the first part of this story stitched into something else. I mean, it's absolute genius. Totally diabolical.

4*, mate.