Locked In Amber Ch. 13

It was as if time itself came to a jarring halt. Too late, Amber realized what she'd just admitted to her own father. Oh, fuck! The admission hung in the air. For a moment, her father just stared at her, his mouth half-open. Whatever he'd been about to say had been completely obliterated. Time slammed back into motion as Ed hoarsely croaked, "You what?"

Well, the cat's out of the bag now! Amber's meeker self was completely pushed aside. "You heard me. I'm sorry if that makes you uncomfortable, but it's true. Spencer and I love each other and we are both adults and we can do what we want together. And maybe you'll say this is 'your house, your rules'. So be it. If I need to, I'll make other arrangements in order to not break one of your precious rules. But if Spencer and I want to have sex as a way to express our love for each other, we are going to do so!" She was facing her father across the table, her pulse cranking along at a brisk pace while her chest was heaving to keep her breath in sync. Deep down she knew she was probably throwing gasoline on the fire and making things worse, but at the moment, she didn't care as she stared her father down.

Ed's eyes were wide open and his face had taken on a reddish hue. "But how do you know?" he grimaced. "How long have you known him? You certainly didn't talk about him before I left on this trip! So that's what? Four days? Five? And now you're having sex? I... I... I can't even believe I'm having this conversation! Yet somehow, you know you're in love? You make statements about how you're an adult, and yet you behave in such an immature fashion!"

Amber was livid now and as much as she wanted to yell, her voice went soft, a keen edge to the words. "And how old were you when you met Mom? You were in college, if I recall, so younger than I am now."

At the mention of his dead wife, a flash of pain surfaced across Ed's eyes before submerging again back into his anger. His brow furrowed even further. "That was different," he muttered, stubbornly.

"The hell it is!" Amber continued her scathing barrage. "How many times did you tell me that it was love at first sight? Hmm? So it's okay when it's you, but not when it's me? I'd ask Mom's take on the matter, but she's not here to tell us what she thinks, is she?"

As soon as the words slipped out, Amber desperately wished she could call them back. She knew she'd gone too far. Her father's imposing figure deflated, his shoulders drooping a little under the emotional weight and he sat back down. He glanced over at a picture of the two of them. "Audrey was special," he said, quietly.

Amber saw the effect her words had on him and felt terrible. She knew how much the loss had affected her father and she hadn't meant to use it as a weapon. She took a deep breath and tried to calm her voice, but it still shook. "I... I know she was. I'm sorry, Dad. That was out of line."

He glanced back at her and nodded.

"Mom was special to you. And Spencer is special to me," Amber continued, trying to navigate the damage, but not wanting to let the conversation drop. She sat back in her seat.

"Yes, but it just feels so fast, so soon. I still think you're rushing into it," he said, stubbornly, his attention now focused on pushing his eggs around his plate.

Amber's temper hadn't fully extinguished. "Jesus, Dad! You are so damned stubborn! So when is it okay, hmm? A couple of weeks? A month? Or maybe I should wait several years like you and Sophia."

Her father's head whipped up and he stared at her. "What do you mean by that?"

"I mean you two have been playing this game of denial for years. It's so obvious to the rest of us. I don't know why, but you keep pretending there's nothing there. I think she finally got tired of waiting for you and took matters into her own hands."

He looked away. "I... I don't know what you're talking about," he stuttered.

Amber just stared at him, her eyebrow raised. When she didn't reply, he glanced back at her and then quickly looked down sheepishly.

"How..."

"We crossed paths last night. She was leaving as I got home. We talked."

"You talked? About..." Ed's face hardened and he made one last attempt to deflect. "She and I..., that, uhh, that was a mistake. It won't—"

"DON'T YOU DARE CALL THAT A MISTAKE!" Amber interjected, her fury rekindled. "Don't you dare try to pretend any longer! And to try and cover that up by calling it a mistake is a total insult to Sophia!" Amber paused, her chest heaving. She closed her eyes for a moment, breathing deeply in an attempt to calm herself down. When she opened them again, her father was staring at his plate, a look of dejection on his face.

Finally, in a calmer voice, she continued, "She is a wonderful woman, you two obviously care deeply for each other, and there's no reason you shouldn't be together. She's the best thing to happen to you in a very long time."

Ed's anger completely vanished and a look of chagrin came over him. "You're right," he said quietly. "She is. That was insulting."

Amber was taken aback. Her father's stubbornness was legendary, so to see him admit so plainly that he was in the wrong felt utterly alien. Her own anger subsided. She was at a loss for words, so she just sat looking at him, continuing to work on getting her own breath back under control.

It was as if all the tension in the air had suddenly vented out an airlock. Ed seemed introspective and munched absentmindedly on a piece of cold bacon. The two ate in awkward silence for a few moments.

"She, uh, she left me a sweet note," he said, quietly. "She didn't like leaving in the middle of the night but wanted to do so out of respect for you until we had a chance to tell you."

"Yeah, she mentioned that."

"Umm..." Her father, always taciturn, seemed especially at a loss for words.

Amber decided to save him from the discomfort. "I'm okay with it." She thought she detected a hint of relief in his shoulders. "It feels a bit weird, but that's for me to work through. I'm happy for you. Kat and I have been wondering for a long time. Heck, even Spencer wondered after yesterday evening."

"Wondered about what?" He was finally looking at her.

"Well, Kat and I have talked about it for at least a couple of years, wondering when you two would finally just... do something. Kiss. Hold hands. Hell, even just talk about it."

Her father again looked at the picture of him and Audrey, chewing on some bacon as he collected his thoughts. "I was with your mother for a very long time. I know a lot of couples now get married and divorced like it's a fashion statement. You're mother and I... it wasn't like that. We truly felt a bond with one another. When you're with someone for a long time and you really care about them as we did, it's really hard to lose them. I'm not just talking about the obvious stuff like the grief of missing them, which is plenty terrible on its own. I'm also talking about the awkwardness of meeting other people, of admitting to yourself that you might be attracted to or fond of another person, and then admitting something to them. And when you've been out of dating for so long, it feels very foreign, like something other people do. And, to make it all worse, some of us are just stubborn and don't ask."

Amber smiled. "Well, at least you finally admit it."

"So it... We were obvious?"

"Well, let's just put it this way. Spencer had only just met you and when we got in the car, he figured something was up with you two."

"Oh." Ed paused for a moment and then segued the conversation. "So, about Spencer..."

"Yes?" It was Amber's turn to tense up.

Her father rubbed his face and chin as he thought. "I'm sorry I was so hard on him. I was exhausted when I came home to the surprise of a strange boy—sorry—a strange young man in my house. Plus, I just don't want to see you get hurt. I know something happened after your mother died and I know I wasn't there for you and I don't want it to happen again. You've never talked about Spencer and it all just boiled up."

This openness from her father was new and it was taking some getting used to. It felt like a new chapter in her life. "I understand, Dad. And I do understand and appreciate your concern. But I'm not a little girl. Spencer has been the kindest, most caring guy I've met. And it's not like we've only known each other since last weekend. I know I haven't talked about him with you so it seems like he's new in my life, but we've actually known each other for quite a while now. He comes to the office sometimes, but we were both too shy to initiate a date. Then chance brought us together. And, to be honest, I treated him terribly due to a misunderstanding and some poor choices on my part. Yet he was patient and forgiving. He's said he looks at me as a whole person, not just one incident. I feel safe and secure with him. I feel cared for and know that he is genuinely interested in me," Amber pointed to her heart, "not just some fling, not an object. And I care very much for him. I don't know what the future holds, but I know that right now, through spending time with him, I have come to know myself better, I value myself more, and I am happier than I've been in a long time."

A hint of surprise crossed Ed's gaze as studied his daughter before morphing into a look that she had never seen. The silence was bordering on uncomfortable when he finally spoke up. "When did you become such a wise daughter?"

As Amber sat looking at him across the table, a realization dawned on her that explained her father's look. It's because he sees me as more than just his daughter, more than just his little girl. He sees me as an adult. "I don't know when but it was probably because I had such great parents."

******

They had finished breakfast and were cleaning up when Ed asked her a question. "I've been thinking about something you said earlier. Something about 'my house, my rules.'"

Amber grabbed a towel and started drying the dishes on the rack. "Yeah?"

Ed turned off the water and then turned to her, leaning back against the counter. "What exactly did you mean?"

"Well... you've said that for a long time. You didn't want me out partying, bringing guys home, stuff like that. And now, with Spencer... Well, we want to spend time together and I don't want to always go over to his house and I don't want to feel pressured by you. I kind of blurted it out in anger, but it was the truth. If that kind of pressure is going to be present, then I'll have to figure out other living arrangements. I don't mean that to sound like a threat, I just mean that I'll want to respect you but also live my own life."

"I see," he rumbled. He grabbed some of the dry dishes she had placed on the counter and began putting them away. "Amber, when I said that, you were 16 years old. Not that I thought you were a troublemaker, but I just wanted to steer you straight."

"Oh." Amber thought back and realized that yes, it had been a very long time ago. She had just always held that standard since nothing had really changed. Well, nothing other than growing up and becoming an adult. Guess I just sort of assumed...

"If you want your boyfriend over, I'm not going to stop you. And I'm certainly not going to kick you out. You're an adult. It's way past time I start to let go and trust that I raised you right." He stopped and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. "Though I've got to admit, that's a lot harder than I thought it would be."

"Thanks, Dad." She smiled and hugged him. He hesitated a moment in surprise before his crushing response reminded her of her childhood when she believed he would always protect her from the monsters. She savored the moment before letting go. He hesitated again, this time his arms still wrapped around her a few seconds longer.

When they parted, she moved over to hang up the towel. "I've gotta say... First, you admit you're kind of stubborn and now you admit that it's hard to let go. Guess we can teach an old dog new tricks."

"Careful now," he growled. Amber just grinned.

As they made their way out of the kitchen, he asked her, "What would you say to a barbeque this evening? We could have Spencer over so I could get to know him properly."

Amber's face brightened. "That would be great! And we could invite Sophia too."

Her father halted for a moment before continuing into the living room. "Uh, yeah. Yes, we should."

"What's the matter? Worried about something awkward, Dad? Something about the day after?" she teased.

Her father actually blushed and looked sheepish. "Umm, something like that."

Amber thought quickly. "How about this? We also invite Kat and Aaron. That way we have a nice mix of people and it won't feel so much one-on-one. I'll contact everyone for you."

"Hmm, that might work. I still don't know what to say to Sophia though."

"Well, 'good evening' might be a nice way to start. Just go with it, Dad. She's smart. Tell her what's on your mind. I think you will be your biggest hurdle."

Her father just nodded and then grabbed his keys. "Go ahead and make the calls. I guess I'd better head out for some steaks and other stuff to eat.

"Sure thing." She walked with him to the door into the garage. As he closed his truck's door and rolled down the window, she said, "One more thing, Dad. Thanks for the talk."

He glanced back, a soft look in his eye as a soft half-smile raised his lips. He nodded, and said, "Same here, kiddo," as he backed out of the garage.

******

Amber felt a strange energy coursing through her body throughout the day. Part of it was excitement—by some stroke of luck, almost everyone was available that evening. Aaron had to work, but Kat said she would absolutely be over. Sophia had said she would be delighted, while Spencer jokingly asked if he should bring a suit of armor or dueling pistols.

The other reason for Amber's odd mood was the fact that, after her father's return from the store, something seemed to have changed between the two. He was still his gruff self, but she didn't feel a pressure that she hadn't even realized had been there. It was similar to when she'd got her glasses for the first time—she hadn't known her eyesight was that bad until the lenses made the tree across the parking lot come into focus.

Where did the pressure even come from, she thought as she prepared a potato salad. Dad being a bit overbearing and protective? Me being a total non-rebel rules follower? Mom dying and the apocalypse that followed? Probably all of that and more. It's kind of embarrassing actually. All this time, I've sort of been on lockdown in my life. It's like, I knew what to focus on in school, but beyond that, nothing's changed. I'm working an office job that doesn't use my degree; I didn't really date after Todd; I still live at home. It's no wonder that I subconsciously just lived my life by rules from when I was a teenager.

Despite the embarrassment, the whole thing blowing up did have some positives. First, of course, was the opportunity to start thinking of herself as an adult on a more substantial level. The second positive was, now that the air had cleared from their fight earlier, it was obvious that their relationship had shifted a bit. Her father had asked her about Spencer and how they knew each other, what he did for a living, and if they had any plans for the weekend.

She did notice, however, that he still seemed a bit uncomfortable answering questions about Sophia, so Amber had dropped the subject. Amber was in the middle of trying to figure out how best to help him feel more comfortable about it when the doorbell rang. It was Kat.

"Hey, you're the first one here," Amber said, hugging her. "Thanks for coming on such short notice."

"Absolutely!" Kat replied as she handed Amber a bowl of salad. "I feel like we've hardly spent any time together just hanging out lately. Besides, I want to see you and Spencer together." She winked.

Amber smiled shyly. It would only be a matter of time before Kat started hounding her for details and she'd have to spill the beans. Not that she truly minded—it was just one of their little games they'd always played over the years. Of course, it was more often the other way around since Amber had always been the straight-laced one with a dearth of wild stories to share.

As the two entered the kitchen, Ed nearly ran into them on his way out. He smiled at Kat and then his eyes went wide in surprise. "Kat? Good grief, girl, your hair!" he boomed. "I nearly didn't recognize you!"

"Hey, Mr. Locke. Yeah, it's a new look."

Ed nodded and continued past them. Amber thought she heard him mutter something about, "...everything's changing..." as he stepped out on the patio.

The two girls were gathering plates and tableware in the kitchen while Amber's father readied the grill on the back patio when the doorbell rang again. It was Spencer. As Amber opened the front door, he stepped back as Sophia came up the steps behind him carrying a bag. "After you," he said, holding the screen door for her.

"Thank you," she replied. Then as she passed Amber, "such a gentleman."

Spencer came in and Amber gave him a hug and kiss. He had on a subtle cologne and she approved. There was also a new warmth radiating from her heart when she hugged him and a tingle on her lips after she kissed him. Something about knowing he's mine, she thought.

"How's your dad," he whispered as her lips left his.

"Sharpening his saber."

"Saber?" he said, feigning alarm. "And here I hoped we'd fight it out with video games. I practiced building up my finger endurance for nothing."

"Well, I'll be sure to come up with something you can use your fingers on so all that hard work doesn't go to waste," Amber said seductively. He grinned as she took his hand and pulled him into the kitchen behind her. Sophia was already pulling out some bread she had baked and it smelled heavenly. "Dad's out back," Amber said to her as she inhaled the aroma. "Geez, Sophia, is there anything you can't cook?"

Sophia looked up and thought for a second. "Microwave popcorn."

Amber wasn't actually expecting an answer and was momentarily confused. She gave Sophia a questioning look. "Huh?"

"I always seem to either cook it too long and it is burnt, or I don't cook it long enough and half the kernels are wasted. Every time. I don't know... perhaps it is my microwave." She paused for a moment. "Hmm, perhaps I should have Edward come over and check out my equipment." She turned and walked out the sliding glass door to say hello to Amber's father.

Amber, Spencer, and Kat all looked at each other, their eyes communicating the same question—Did Sophia just drop a double entendre? Was it intentional? All three started laughing.

******

"So, Spencer. Amber tells me you do something with computers?" Ed was standing at the grill, turning the steaks while Katelyn, Amber, and Spencer were busy setting out the food on the nearby table.

"Yes, Sir," Spencer replied as he set down the salad bowl. His eyes flicked towards Amber, making brief eye contact before looking at her father. "I have my own business. It's a mix of contract IT work, tech repairs, and programming. Plenty to keep me busy. The IT work was how I met your daughter. I had just started a new contract with her company."

"I see." Ed's deep voice lacked the hostility it had the previous night. As he moved the meat around, some fat dripped through the grill and flames licked the steaks with a sizzle. Ed quickly pulled his hand away with practiced familiarity. "Been at it long?"

"Well, that depends on what you mean," Spencer continued as he tore some paper towels off a roll and placed them on the table for napkins. "The business is only a couple of years old, but I've been tinkering with programming and tech all my life. And my father worked for IBM for his entire career, so I've pretty much grown up around computers."