Lonely Orcish Girl

Katuri giggled briefly, again as if at her own memories, but then she became more serious again. "The adults in the tribe, even if they didn't like my presence, usually had not expressed that. Or they simply accepted me out of respect for my mother. But things were very different with my peers. They had no inhibitions about showing me that they thought I was inferior. They treated me like a worse version of an orc. Especially the other girls, when we all hit puberty."

"They were jealous of you?" Asked Reed on impulse, not realizing he was complimenting her.

"Possibly," Katuri smirked briefly. "But you must know that life as a teenager among orcs was a constant competition for almost everything. Who could hunt better, who was a more skilled fighter, or... who could seduce the boys better. And while I was definitely better at hunting, the girls of the tribe made sure I was not better at anything else. Especially when the boys were watching."

"What would they do?"

"Well, everything they could to embarrass me. For example, when we trained to fight, they would try to dominate me. And they succeeded in most cases because I wasn't as big and strong as they were. Even if I was really better at something than them, like hunting or... because I was just damn smarter than them, they would diminish all. Then they'd make remarks about my body and spread rumors that I was too soft for an orc, or that I was too weak to grow proper tusks, or... that I wouldn't be able to procreate with orcs, which of course was a ridiculous lie, but it worked. This scared the young orcs away from me, although at first, they were interested in my different, somewhat softer appearance. After a while, they all thought I was a weirdo..."

"I'm very sorry to hear that," Reed said quietly.

Katuri waved her hand seemingly dismissively, but it was clear to Reed that she wasn't so unmoved. "Anyway, it kind of backfired on them. But mostly on me, of course, hah! Because the more they mocked me or laughed at me, the more I wanted to rebel against the tribe to show them. So I stayed away from my peers, constantly sneaking out of the village and going in all kinds of directions. I liked to be alone in nature. And during one of my excursions, I came across a caravan that was stationed close to my village for a while. They were elves."

Reed was silent, as he sensed that Katuri needed time and space to gather her thoughts. He was aware that her story didn't have a happy ending, but couldn't deny that it was intriguing. A caravan of elves? To Reed, it sounded like a tale. He had never met an elf in his life.

"Obviously, the elves were very different people than the orcs. Wealthy and worldly, with elegant clothing, ostentatious carriages, and so on. They also had armed guards. Of course, I only watched them from a distance because I knew they would surely react badly if they had a savage orc nearby." Katuri winced a little, but continued, "I was very careful, but one day when I was on my way back, I met a boy in the forest."

"Oh..." Reed gasped quietly.

"He was the son of the richest nobleman in the caravan. His name was... Ehrendil," Katuri pronounced this word with some wistfulness.

"Sounds very exotic," Reed replied cautiously, guessing what Katuri thought about that elf.

"Yes... He was startled when he saw me, but only because we ran into each other so unexpectedly. Not because of... my appearance." She paused to clear her throat. Her voice was still hoarse when she spoke again. "He was friendly and seemed interested in getting to know me..."

Reed just listened, not daring to interrupt her, though he was curious and wanted to ask many questions. He knew that it wasn't easy for Katuri to open up like this.

"That first day we talked a lot, and Ehrendil seemed fascinated by meeting an orcish girl. And I... I was fascinated to meet the first friendly boy in my life. Someone who seemed to have no prejudice against me," Katuri spoke quietly. She pulled her knees to her chest.

"I was shocked at how... beautiful Ehrendil was. It was almost unreal. Tall, slender but wiry, hair like molten gold, a face so perfect you couldn't even describe it. It seemed impossible that anyone could be so beautiful," there was still a hint of disbelief in her voice. She shook her head.

Reed felt a strange twinge of irrational jealousy. He himself was considered handsome in his village - with his tall stance and strawberry blond curls - but he certainly couldn't compare himself to a beautiful elf...

"I felt like an ugly troll next to him. Like a swamp monster next to a prince. But Ehrendil never made me feel that way. He told me... that I was beautiful. That I looked like a heroine from the books he read. He had even brought one of them with him and showed me illustrations depicting barely clothed women... built like me, tall, muscular, and so on. It seemed he liked that type..."

Reed tried to listen without interrupting her, for he didn't want to intrude and make himself the center of attention. He saw how much it cost her to tell this story. But when he heard Katuri come down hard on herself, he just couldn't let it pass.

"Hey, don't say things like that. I'm sure a lot of people would find you very attractive," he interfered quietly, but firmly. He also tried to make his statement sound more like an objective opinion, not his own, personal observation.

Katuri looked at him and blinked a few times as if she was taken aback by his words. Then she smiled at him somewhat ruefully, but made no comment, she simply continued with her story.

"I fell for his words, for his interest and attention. I knew there would be a slim chance for us to be together, but... I fell for it anyway. I don't know, there was something exciting in the taboo aspect of our clandestine meetings. But I was infatuated. And I just wanted to be... to be wanted." Katuri swallowed and averted her gaze, her jaw tightening. She blinked rapidly as if trying to get rid of the tears.

Reed moved nervously under the furs, unsure of what to do. He wanted to relieve Katuri's stress somehow but didn't know how.Do something, he scolded himself in his mind, but he still didn't move.

However, he decided to help her change the mood by asking about some less relevant things, "What was he even doing in the woods? Did elves have their camp there?"

The young orcess sighed. "There were some ancient ruins of an old elven goddess temple in the forest and they were visiting them with pilgrimage..." She went silent for a while and soon resumed her story.

"I allowed Ehrendil to be my first," said Katuri in a calm but sullen and deadly serious voice. She stared at Reed, her expression seemed impassive, only her violet eyes burning with emotion.

"It was beautiful, to be honest, I couldn't complain." Katuri paused and her eyes gazed into space. Then she slowly shook her head and continued, "So we added passionate sex to our secret trysts. I felt like I was in a fairy tale where a handsome, rich prince chooses an average peasant girl. I was stupid, Reed, so damn stupid. In retrospect, I knew it was a break in boredom for Ehrendil. A new experience, a temporary rapture. I didn't know it then, but that soon changed."

"What happened?" Reed asked, his voice strained and rough. He felt a surge of anger at this elf, even though he had never met him.

"One day we were caught in the act by his father."

"Oh, gods!" Reed gasped in surprise.

"His reaction was completely different than I would expect from orcish parents. He was icy cold and composed, just told Ehrendil to get dressed and called the guards. The way he looked at me... like I was a worthless worm." Katuri's voice trembled.

Reed wanted to sit up and hug her, but he thought that would be too bold. Instead, he loosened his hand from under the furs, reached for hers, and enclosed her palm with his own. Katuri absentmindedly glanced at their joined hands. He squeezed her fingers as she continued her story. She didn't seem to be bothered by it, but also she didn't react in any other way.

"The guards, Ehrendil's parents, and my lover himself escorted me to their camp. Then an interrogation took place. Ehrendil's father, his wife, and the other elves accused me of spying, which was absurd, and also of seducing their son. They just set me up as a scapegoat. Ehrendil sat quietly the whole time and allowed his parents to lash out at me and insult me. Then, the elves asked me and Ehrendil for explanations. And I, in my damned infinite stupidity and naivety, said what I thought was the truth - that I was in love with him. But Ehrendil didn't react to my words. He calmly said... that it was just sex. That he wanted to try something new. I couldn't believe that was what he really felt. I wanted to... I wanted to believe that he was just saying all that so as not to upset his father, but... I already knew I was just fooling myself. Ehrendil didn't feel anything for me. I was just a toy for a bored and spoiled young elven heir. A distraction."

Katuri looked up at the ceiling and tears shimmered in her eyes. She clenched her left hand so hard that her knuckles turned white.

"I barely registered what happened next. I was numb as if someone had hit me with a club. Elves tied me up like a pig and brought me to the gates of my village. I didn't know what exactly they said to the orcs, but they must have said enough so the people from my tribe knew everything. The next thing I knew, I had to listen to the scolding of our chief and the council of elders about how huge the disappointment and shame I brought upon them. It didn't even surprise me when they decided to banish me. After all, I had given away my virginity to their worst enemy, right? A young orcish woman mating with an elf and even humiliating herself so much to proclaim her love to him? That was far too much for a great orc honor." Katuri adopted a sarcastic tone again, but it was obvious to Reed that it was a coping technique for her.

The orcish girl didn't look at him, but curiously enough, their hands stayed connected...

"My mother tried to fight for me, but I told her to let it go. I was kind of relieved to leave the tribe. It was... freedom. So I left with almost nothing, just my bow and a grudge against the tribe. The rest of my story was full of more stupid decisions. Since I had always been a decent archer, I thought I could join some adventurers and make a living that way. So I joined some people, only to find that they saw a different purpose for me in their group. After the first camp, I knocked out one of the men who tried to put his dirty hands on me and ran away. Then I came back here, found this clearing, and built this house. I decided to live as a hermit."

Katuri said the last word and there was a long moment of silence.

She lowered her eyes and pensively looked at Reed's hand, which held her own as if only now realizing it. It worried him a little that she might not want his touch anymore, but she didn't take her hand away, so he continued to hold it. He sensed that she needed it. And he couldn't deny that it was pleasant to hold her this way.

Katuri looked at him and smiled sadly. "Do you believe me now that I knew how you felt, Reed?"

"Yes," he answered simply. And then he added earnestly. "And I'm very sorry that all this happened to you. That was... too much for one person. And that Ehrendil?! What a coward, what a weasel! I'm very sorry, Katuri! You didn't deserve any of this!"

"Oh, yeah?" Katuri winced and said resignedly, "You don't know me, Reed. Maybe this was exactly what I deserved. For being naive and easily impressionable."

"No, I don't think so. Yes, I don't know you well, but I know you're a good person, Katuri. You deserve much better! Being naive or trusting doesn't give people the right to mistreat us. If that wasn't the truth, would that mean that I also deserved... heartbreak? To be deceived and fooled? Or was it just someone else's ill will and selfishness?"

Katuri looked at him insistently, as if desperately searching for a way to refute his words. Finally, she sighed and said, "You're right. But it means that true love not only barely exists, but is overrated. And for an orc like me, it's pretty impossible. Orcs... just don't get to be loved."

Katuri's words seemed full of disappointment and they hit him hard at first, but after a moment - a clarity came. He smiled at her and said, "I disagree. You know, so far in our stories, only a human girl and an elf boy have been dishonest and vile. But there is also an example of true and strong love between a human and an orcish woman!"

Katuri frowned, she fixed her violet eyes on her knees as if still not convinced.

"Your parents are a great example of overcoming hardship and... stereotypes," he said excitedly, giving her hand a little squeeze. The fact that he was still holding Katuri's hand made their conversation that much more intimate.

"That's only one, rare case..." Katuri whispered but fell silent in mid-sentence as if she understood in delay what Reed was trying to emphasize.

"Your mother was willing to fight for your father against anyone in your tribe. And he... He gave up a much simpler life among the humans and was willing to be mocked and mistreated by the orcs. All of it for... her! If that's not true love, I don't know what could be! Even if they are a rare case, there is always a chance for... everyone," he finished a bit sheepishly.

Katuri snorted at first but then a soft smile lit up her face. For the first time in a long time, it was a happy smile. "Well, you're right. Rare but not impossible. Maybe we should never give up hope? "

"A lot of good things are rare in this world. We don't know what lies ahead of us. Future can be surprising!" Reed added passionately.

Katuri laughed heartily and shook her head. She glanced again at their joined hands. This time she squeezed his hand lightly as if saying 'thank you', then freed it, and put it back on the furs. She covered Reed tightly.

"Perhaps it will be, my bright spark," she smiled warmly at him. "But enough talk for tonight, for I don't know if your eyes are shining with excitement or if the fever is back. I think it's more the latter."

"Oh, it's mostly excitement... and maybe a little fever," Reed joked with her, but in fact he felt both a rising fever and a strange joy. He added in a serious tone, "Thank you, Katuri, for telling me your story. I appreciate your trust..."

"It's all right, Reed." The orcess smiled back at him, straightened up, and sat back on her heels.

The young orcess seemed to want to leave Reed's nook but for some reason hesitated. She placed her hand on his forehead, as she had often done, but this time she did it differently. Her fingers ran slowly through Reed's hair, and suddenly she leaned down and kissed him on the cheek.

It wasn't just a quick peck on the cheek, but Katuri pressed her full lips to Reed's skin for a few seconds. Reed was surprised and thrilled at the same time because he was almost sure that it was a way of thanking him for listening. He didn't feel like he had done anything out of the ordinary, but he couldn't complain because Katuri's kiss was delightful. A wave of heat arose in him, but the fever didn't cause it.

The orcish girl bent over his face and smiled broadly as if pleased with the impression her kiss made. Then she nuzzled his nose jokingly and said, "Sleep well, Reed."

"You too, Katuri," he replied.

She left him alone as she had the day before, but this time the atmosphere between them was very different. He tried to comprehend it all but fell asleep very quickly.

***

Reed slept fitfully, haunted by a troublesome dream. He was in an eerily dark forest, trying to catch Jolene. The girl laughed herself silly and teasingly asked Reed to chase her. He tried, but couldn't shake the unsettling feeling that something was wrong and he shouldn't have done it.

Every time he got closer to Jolene, she would magically disappear behind a tree, only to reappear a few feet in front of him. And the worst part was the feeling of powerlessness: no matter how hard he tried to run faster, he moved as if he were underwater. Jolene's laughter changed and grew more sinister with each attempt Reed made to catch her.

This vicious cycle became even more exhausting when Reed began to see Katuri in his dream. She was standing between trees, reaching for him each time he went past her, and then she looked disappointed and sad that he didn't respond. He wanted to stop chasing Jolene, but he had no control over his body. It was unbearable.

Finally, his own faint groan woke him up. Reed sat up abruptly, panting heavily. For a moment he had trouble making out where he was since it was completely dark around him. But the touch of the furs soothed him and helped him to detach himself from this disturbing dream.

He knew he had a severe fever, but the full bladder was bothering him even more, so he pushed the skins aside and moved out of the mantel. But as soon as he swung his legs over the edge, his feet touched... something that was out of order. It was smooth and warm.

The moment he guessed what it was, he heard Katuri say, "What's wrong?"

"Ah!" he yelped a little startled when he realized he had touched her body. She must have been sleeping on the floor, next to the stove. This realization struck him.

Reed sensed more than saw Katuri standing up beside him, as it was pitch dark in the house. He felt her hand on his shoulder.

"Are you alright? What happened?" she asked in a worried voice. She touched his cheek. "Damn, you're burning up like a furnace."

"Nothing... I just woke up and wanted to pee," he answered weakly, feeling a bit dizzy. His temples were pulsating.

"Wait, I'll take the lamp." Katuri moved and Reed heard her rustling with something.

Soon the dim light of a small olive lamp illuminated the room, and Reed blinked a few times, temporarily blinded. When his eyes readjusted, he could barely keep from gasping for air.

Katuri... was almost naked. Again she wore the breast band he had seen earlier while chopping wood. Over her hips, she wore only a skimpy loincloth. Her muscular arms, chiseled stomach, and shapely legs were exposed.

The orcess approached the bewildered Reed, who was still sitting on the edge of the fireplace. She noticed he covered his crotch with his hands and looked at her in confusion. Then she walked across the room and retrieved something from the chest. Reed recognized two blankets.

"Here, cover yourself, it's chilly out at night," she said, handing him one blanket. The second she shouldered herself in the form of a cloak.

Reed stood up and put the blanket around his shoulders, noticing that Katuri averted her gaze to give him privacy. He would probably appreciate it if he didn't feel so exhausted. The fever had really weakened him.

Katuri reached for the lamp and held Reed by the elbow with her second hand. She stood right next to him, and for the first time, he realized how much taller she was. She had about half a head advantage over his six foot, which put her at maybe six-foot-four. But that didn't surprise him, besides, it made perfect sense to his foggy mind at the moment.

"You can lean on my arm, Reed," she said calmly.

"Thank you," he replied quietly, gripping her warm hard forearm. Normally he would have been embarrassed to require help in this way, but at that moment he felt so weak that he didn't care. Besides, touching Katuri's arm was a pleasant and interesting experience for him. Her skin was smooth, but the most shocking thing was that Katuri's arm didn't even budge under his weight. It was as hard as a stone.

She helped him go to the latrine and waited outside. Then she led him back to the bed while throwing her blanket on the chair.