All Comments on 'Long Beach'

You might care to check and resubmit this: there are a couple of paragraphs, starting with "Eve noticed the rambunctious blonde," which are repeated. Good proofreading should avoid errors like this. The story itself is promising as a first chapter although you give no indication whether you intend to continue it. The potential is there---it's up to you to follow through.

This is great! I’m keen to read more.

Very good introduction - well written with interesting characters. You definitely want to get to know them and their histories better.

Interesting & Strange beginning for "Lesbian Romance" story. Initially, I thought that this story was mistakenly placed in the Lesbian category. Perhaps the would have appealed more if Ch. 01 was 1 or 2 pages longer, with a bit more interaction be tween Eve / Ripley. Most of the "outstanding" Lesbian Romance on Literotica ended with readers salivating for more and searching daily for Ch. 02.

This story appears to have a nice storyline, is well written, however did not leave me salivating for Ch. 02. I am certain to read Ch. 02, however hope that it will expeditiously develop into a Lesbian Romance, versus a drunken Ripley and her boyfriend Wade.

For me, "Long Beach Ch. 01" was a very weak 3*-Star Rating because of the above comments, especially Wade's major role in introducing a Lesbian Romance!!

I am a bit confused on location here. It kind of seems to be located in California, but a lot of the dialog indicated England.

Kindly post chapter 2 very soon. I'm looking forward to reading more.

Hi guys, thanks for the feedback it's really useful!

As for the geography thing, yeah I sort of wanted to set it in America but I am Australian so I guess I have a little trouble with that. I'll definitely work on all this stuff though, could be a little while on next chapter cuz I'm kinda busy with the fires. Thanks for reading though!

Definitely wanting another chapter.

More chapters, please.

Long time no see :-(

I'd appreciate if you'd plan to continue this nice story!