Lost and Found

"Of course. It's a...2018," Tyler told her with a raised eyebrow.

Alanis smiled again and thanked him for the water.

"And thank you for making me get out of the house again, too."

"Thank you for coming with me. I've been meaning to come out here again for a year or so, but I didn't really want to come by myself."

Alanis took another sip then said, "Surely you could find a pretty, young girl to come with you."

She smiled afterward, but the smile disappeared with Tyler replied.

Without smiling, he looked at her and said, "I did."

Alanis felt her tummy flip flop, and in what was becoming the norm, she turned her eyes away and asked what he'd brought for lunch.

Tyler produced some ham and cheese sandwiches, and as they ate Alanis mentioned what a beautiful day it was and how nice it was to be outside. When Tyler then mentioned that she was beautiful—again—she stopped eating and asked him a question.

"Tyler? Why do you like me?"

The question surprised him because he thought she knew the answer already.

"I...I don't understand," he replied.

His response surprised her because she was equally sure he knew she really didn't understand.

"I mean...I...I have all these issues. And you're young and handsome and you could date anyone you'd like. So...why me? she asked, phrasing the same question a little differently.

"I still don't know why you're asking me that," he told her as gently as he could.

She looked right at him then said, "Tyler, I'm broke. Well, that's true, but what I meant to say was that I'm...broken."

"No. No you're not," he replied immediately. He got up, moved around the table then sat next to her before continuing. "You're not broken, Alanis. You're...heart broken, and there's a big difference."

She didn't reply but she was listening.

"Listen. I saw you. The real you. When we were washing your car. That woman is...amazing. And I'm unbelievably attracted to her, and I want to get to know her and, well, hopefully have a relationship with her."

Too afraid to look at him while he spoke, Alanis looked down at her sandwich which had attracted a long column of tiny red ants. She wasn't hungry any longer anyway, so she just sat there and watched them doing marching along.

"Does that answer your question?" she heard him say.

Alanis finally sat up then looked at him and asked, "Do you maybe see me as some kind of...I don't know, maybe a...a mother figure or something?"

It was a kind, caring question rather than an accusation, and Tyler took no offense.

"No. Not at all," he told her as he stared into her eyes. "I have a wonderful mother, and I don't need another one."

She held his gaze this time and after a brief pause, he reached his hand up and gently touched her cheek then said, "I don't mean this to sound cliché, Alanis, but you're...well, you're the woman of my dreams."

His answer touched her so deeply it made her feel loved for the first time in maybe three years; back before she learned of the affair and felt reasonably close to the man she'd married.

She finally smiled then, trying to be funny or avoid the growing seriousness of the situation, told him, "You must have nightmares."

"No. No nightmares," he said very quietly.

Alanis was still smiling, so Tyler slowly leaned in to kiss her, but she turned away just as slowly then said, "I do."

Before he could ask for clarification she said, "I have nightmares. All the time."

"I don't think that would surprise anyone," he said, still speaking quietly. "Not after what you've been through."

"I blame myself, you know," she told him, her voice now hollow and cold.

"But why? You didn't do anything wrong. I can understand loving Aria and feeling as though you had an obligation to protect her, but I don't see where you could have prevented this...tragedy."

"Aria struggled with her weight. She wasn't...fat. She was just a few pounds overweight. But it bothered her so much. Along with many other things."

Tyler knew there was more to this story so he sat and waited for her to get this all out.

"When I got into Cross Fit, I started enjoying it. And after maybe six months I really loved it. So one day, when Aria said something about wishing she didn't have to wear baggy clothes to hide her...her...fat body, I suggested she should come with me. To Cross Fit."

"Did she assume you meant she needed to because of the weight?"

Alanis nodded then said, "She didn't say anything. But the way she looked at me told me she felt like I was agreeing with her that she was, you know...fat. And ugly."

"But she had to know you were sharing something with her that you loved. Don't you think she understood that?"

When Alanis turned back his way, she had tears in her eyes again.

"I...I don't know, Tyler. I only know that I can't shake the feeling that...that I...killed her."

As she began to cry, he moved closer and put his arms around her and held her close. As her tears turned to sobs, he held her even closer until she was able to stop.

"So, you see? That's the real me. The broken woman with the broken heart."

She looked up at him with tearstained eyes and said, "If you know what's good for you, you'll run like hell from me and get as far away as you possibly..."

He put both hands on her face this time and wouldn't let her turn away as he pressed his lips against hers. She didn't flinch or pull away, and after a couple of seconds, he felt her kiss back. Softly and slowly at first then with some small amount of passion.

"I'm not going anywhere," he told her as their lips parted.

"Are you sure?" she asked as her eyes danced with his.

"Yes. I'm 100% sure," he replied with a smile.

"So...am I...am I going steady with Frankie Avalon?" she asked, hoping he'd at least heard of the actor from the 1960s.

"He has dark hair. Mine is blond," Tyler told her very seriously.

She reached up and touched it then ran her fingers through it and said, "Your hair is beautiful."

"Um...thank you?" he said with a smile.

"Sorry. Don't worry. I won't say you're beautiful," she told him as she smiled back. "And you don't have to say I am, either, because I know how I look."

"Then you have to know that makes no sense," he said as he continued looking into her eyes. "It makes no sense because you really are beautiful, Alanis."

"You're thinking of the woman you knew two years ago," she said, trying to smile.

"No. I'm pretty sure I've got the right woman, and she's beautiful inside and out," he assured her just before kissing her again. When it ended he said, "And you're an incredible kisser, by the way."

Alanis smiled then said, "Tyler? I honestly don't understand any of this, but..."

"But?"

"But I'm very...happy that you...like me."

He smiled then told her that was true.

"I want you to know I...I like you, too."

"Yeah?" he said with a very big smile.

"Yes. How could I not? I can't help but feel like I was so totally lost until you came back into my life."

"And after that?"

"I guess the word I'd use is—found. Just like Amazing Grace, right? I once was lost, but now I'm found."

"All I know is, I'm glad I found you, Alanis."

"Me, too," she said before kissing him on her own for the first time.

Her sandwich was crawling with ants, and when they looked down at it, Tyler said, "You're not gonna eat that, right?"

Alanis laughed, and although she'd felt better since Tyler came over to clean her house, this was the first time she actually felt really good. Not quite as good as she used to feel all of the time, but she finally felt close to normal again, and all of that was due to her 'surfer boy'.

"You ready to see some more of the park then?" he asked.

"Yes. Definitely," she told him as she smiled happily at this very handsome younger man who'd found her when she was hopelessly lost and made want to live again.

As they walked, Alanis reached over and took Tyler's hand. He let her then let go and put it around her shoulder instead. She wrapped her arm around his waist below the backpack and and held on tight as they walked, talked, and looked.

At one point, they stopped to look at some egrets that were feeding along the bank of a stream, and as they did, Alanis realized that life really was worth living. Things she'd been unable to appreciate—just simple things—were suddenly beautiful once more, and in spite of her own insecurities, Tyler had made her feel beautiful again.

As they stood there holding hands and admiring the beauty of nature, Alanis had no idea where this might go, but she found herself excited about finding out.

When they got home late that afternoon both of them were tired, but even more so, they were happy as Tyler walked her to her doorstep where they said goodbye.

"It's becoming a habit to thank you for a wonderful day," Alanis told him as he held her hands in his.

"That's one habit I wouldn't mind becoming addicted to," Tyler told her without a smile. "Even hopelessly addicted."

"I think I'm going to take a shower and go grocery shopping," she said, the hope in her eyes shining through quite clearly.

"Wow. That's...huge."

"It shouldn't be, but yes, yes it is."

He wanted to ask her if that meant she was going to make dinner for him but decided it was too early. And then, as if she'd read his mind, she asked him if he'd like to come back for dinner.

When he laughed at her request, she was hurt, and Tyler noticed it immediately.

"No. It wasn't funny in that sense," he said before explaining what he'd literally just been thinking.

"Then I'm happy you were thinking the same thing I was," she informed him as she put her hands on his thick, swimmer's chest and kissed him. "So...seven o'clock?"

"I'll be here."

He kissed her again before saying goodbye, and as Alanis went inside to her still-clean house, she didn't feel burdened by the death of her daughter for the first time since she found her and the empty bottle of pills. But it was becoming clear to her that she could no longer live in this house; the house that held the memories of so much sadness, betrayal, death, and depression.

She showered, then before heading to the store, she called her husband who was shocked to see her name on his caller ID.

She explained why she was calling, and he told her he thought that was a fantastic idea. Alanis understood that from his point of view, it meant half of the appreciation the house had in it, and no more worries about defaulting or ruining his credit before it was put in her name only.

It was also his opportunity to inform her he'd hired an attorney and would be filing for divorce. When she told him she thought that was a fantastic idea, he knew something was different.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yes. I'm okay. Great, in fact."

He briefly considered the possibility she was seeing someone then dismissed it just as quickly. He knew his soon-to-be ex-wife had pretty much laid in bed the last two years so the thought that she'd somehow met someone and changed so quickly seemed more absurd the longer he thought about it.

"That's...that's great, Allie," he told her, using his pet name for the woman he'd once loved.

"Okay. I'll get ahold of Ben tomorrow and have him get the house listed."

Ben Diamond was their real estate agent and a personal friend, and for another brief moment, he wondered if Ben was the source of Alanis's newfound sense of optimism. He dismissed that, too, as he didn't really care who she saw or what she did. He just wanted to sever all ties to her once and for all.

"Sounds good. Tell Ben to push for the highest possible price then let me know what you plan to list it for," he told her.

"I'll discuss it with Ben, and he can call you in case you have any questions," she confidently countered.

"Oh. Okay. Um...something is definitely up with you," he told her.

"Maybe so," was all she said in a way that made him wonder once again.

"Yeah. Okay. Great. So um...I'll see you."

"Maybe so," she replied using his line before ending the call and smiling about how well she handled that.

"Thank you, Tyler," she said out loud before heading to the car.

The grocery bill stunned her, but she needed pretty much everything. The other thing the bill did was remind her she had to get a job. Soon. But for now, all she cared about was spending the evening with the amazing, sweet, younger man with the incredible, hard body she realized she was falling for.

"That was delicious," Tyler told her when he finished eating.

"Thank you. I'd forgotten what a joy it is to cook for someone I lo...care about."

Tyler smiled then said, "You almost said the 'L' word, didn't you? Come on. Fess up."

"Maybe," Alanis replied rather coyly as she picked up their plates.

"Well, I lo...you, too," he told her, a big smile on his face.

"No. No, you don't. But that's okay. I just really...like...being with you. How's that?"

Tyler stood up and followed her to the sink where she'd just set the dirty dishes. He put his arms around her from behind then said, "I like spending time with you, too."

Alanis's body was suddenly on fire. Out of nowhere it went from this kind of pleasant warmth to a fiery furnace that was red hot with passion. As Tyler wrapped his arms around her narrow waist she pulled them apart and pushed them upward to the bottom of her breasts. When he groaned quietly, she pulled them up onto her soft mounds then squeezed them shut.

When he then squeezed them again on his own, she moaned loudly and reached back and pulled his head down as she craned her neck to kiss him. As their lips met, she offered him her tongue which he took and then returned the offer in kind.

"Fuck me," she said out of somewhere deep inside of her where unmet needs were pent up and on the verge of exploding.

"Are you sure?" he asked as he slid a hand down her body to a place no one, not even she, had touched in years.

"Don't talk, okay? Just take me to bed and fuck the shit out of me."

Tyler had never, not even in his wildest dreams, even considered she might say something like that. And there was good reason for it. Alanis had never once in her entire life said anything like that. In fact, in all the years she'd been married, she'd never once asked her husband to do anything but 'make love to her' or, on rare occasions when her passions ran hot, tell him, "Take me."

So this, like feeling good again, was new territory for her. And she was about to explore it with someone who was 13 years younger than her, and that excited her even more.

In less than 15 minutes, Alanis was naked, had 'had the shit fucked out of her', and lay next to this handsome, younger man, panting for breath, his cum still all over her pretty face.

"Is there a name for this?" she asked as he handed some tissues to clean up with.

Tyler laughed then told her it was called 'glazing'.

She rolled over and faced him then said, "Wait. You're serious? This really does have a name?"

He laughed and smiled at her then said, "You had me convinced you were a true 'woman of the world' for a minute there, but now I'm pretty sure I had it right before."

Alanis pretended to pout as she replied.

"I'm not going to let your snarky remark bring me down. And for your information, I've never said—or done—anything quite like that before."

"I uh, I could tell," he told her, drawing another look of disbelief.

"I thought I did quite well, thank you very much."

"Oh, you were great. No doubt about that. I just knew you weren't a real...tiger."

She gave him another one of those looks just before he said, "Okay. Maybe a...sleeping tiger?"

"And you've just awoken her from slumber," she said playfully as she tossed the wet tissues somewhere on the floor without looking as she lowered herself to his flaccid member.

"This is also something I've never done before," she told him just before taking him into her warm, wet mouth and bringing him back to life.

"Oh...fuck!" he groaned.

"No. We just did that," she said with a laugh.

"This time, you just lay there and let me practice, okay? I want to get very, very good at this."

As she slid down his growing shaft again, Tyler groaned loudly a second time then said, "If you get any better than that, this won't last very long."

She let his hard cock pop out of her mouth then smiled at him and said, "Good. Then I can try one more new thing."

"Oh?"

"Uh-huh. I've never swallowed before, either," she told him, a wicked smile on her face before she went back to work, learning what he liked, didn't like, and what sent him into orbit.

"Mmmm. Salty," she said when that 'first' was over, too, after ceremoniously swallowing her first-ever 'load' of warm, sticky goo.

"Protein is an essential part of any diet, right?" he teased.

"I think I might want that for dessert every now and then," she cooed as she ran her hand across his chest.

They lay there quietly for a few seconds before Alanis said, "Would you like to try Cross Fit with me?"

Tyler sat up then said, "Wait. You're going back to the gym?"

"Yes. I...I need my life back. The rest of it. All of it. And...I need a job."

He laughed then told her he did, too.

"And yes, I'd love to work out with you."

She laughed then said, "And by 'working out'...what exactly do you mean?"

"Well, as much as I love this kind of workout, we can't exactly do this 24/7, right?"

Alanis got up on one elbow then said, "Silly man. That's what the gym is for. To give us strength for the workouts that really matter!"

"Oh, okay. Then count me in!" he told her before they both laughed, kissed passionately and made love a third time within an hour. Well, it was technically two and a half times, but no one was really counting.

Tyler stayed with her that night, and when Alanis woke up the next morning, she felt like she'd died and gone to heaven. She not only wasn't disappointed to be awake, she was happy. Her house was clean, she had food in the refrigerator, the handsome young man who'd done so much for her and made love to her in a way that was painfully and pleasantly obvious, was still there and sleeping peacefully beside her.

And this morning she was going back to the gym and start training again. With any luck, she'd get her resume updated and start looking for work in another day or two.

In the meantime, she got out of bed and made a pot of coffee while she waited for Tyler to join her. She was just starting her second cup, when he walked into the kitchen wearing nothing but a pair of shorts, and she suddenly tingled from head to toe.

"Good morning," she said with a smile.

"Yes it is," Tyler replied as he smiled back and poured himself a cup.

Another sudden thought hit her and Alanis asked, "So...now that you've seen me first thing in the morning, are you having second thoughts?"

He brought the cup over to the table, set it down, then kissed her softly.

"Nope. Nary a one," he told her. "Besides, I've already seen you at your worst, remember?"

She felt silly for having forgotten about him showing up with Aria's letter when she showed up in a ratty robe with her hair looking like Medusa and her eyes all baggy and swollen.

"Oh, right. So...you're not scared off?" she asked anyway.

"Uh-uh. In fact, you're going to have to run me off if you want to get rid of me."

"Why would I want to do that?" she asked.

"I have no idea, but that's what it's gonna take."

"Tyler? Do you really want to go to the gym with me this morning?"

"I'm not really wild about Cross Fit, to be honest. Do they have a swimming pool?"

"Yes. A nice one."

"Then I'm in," he told her with a smile as he took a first sip.

As much as Alanis wanted to do Cross Fit, she wanted to be with Tyler more, and after thinking about how swimming worked every muscle in the human body, she found it easy to get in the pool with him.