All Comments on 'Lost Bloodlines Ch. 03'

Only one actual error and one bit of grammar that was weird enough to to throw me off (and that wasn't technically incorrect), which is a lot better than most stories without a third party editor.

As for the content of the story? Oh, I love this. Even with all the fantasy elements, the (sometimes silly) little details like the southern boy Christian soldiers being all deferential to the angel or the Vatican sending an exorcist as soon as they knew about a demon makes the world feel a bit more grounded, real, and the characters relatable. Love where I think I can guess the story will be going. Good work.

(I totally wasn't refreshing my follows page every night hoping to see this posted, what do you mean?)

As the previous comment said, the story does feel grounded. How ever one thing niggles me, and that is liliths wings. They seem to be out all the time, when the succubi I know of does not. Ofcorse it's not entirely impossible that there are subspecies of succubi, so that is why.

This is a wonderful, well written story. I has me completely engaged and waiting for more. Even the, admittedly few, word and grammar errors didn't knock me off stride as would be the case with other stories I have read on this site.

Love it. The scene with the scientists was a nice addition. Looking forward to the next part.

The writing quality and nuanced characters are honestly good enough that this could be turned into a novel if the desire and passion is there. There’s enough interesting things going on to make it a fun read.

Extremely engaging, can't wait for morr

Great stuff.

Top tier.

Love it

Great story! I really enjoy reading it and I look forward to part 3.

This story is so much fun! Excited to see where this plot goes as you continue to get more comfortable and become an even better writer throughout this process

Subsequent read throughs have allowed me to notice more errors (my favorite is the swap of exercise and exorcise; maybe Father Maxwell is really into demonic fitness?), but most are like that, words that are a letter away from what they should be, with a few that are an added pronoun or something where it's unneeded. Still not bad and I think the story itself makes up for it

"Curiouser and curiouser!" cried Alice...

Only three chapters in and I'm -very- impressed. Sam's introduction opens up a whole host of questions regarding the ontology of this mythological mashup and its broader implications, not just for society at large, but for the characters as individual actors. Demonic TF stories tend to overwrite the original personality, either outright or through seductive erosion, but even after accepting her new identity, Lilith isn't willing to roll over for her patron spirit, and I can imagine one of the subplots going forward is her integrating this shadow consciousness on -her- terms.

On a similar note, early as we are, I must commend the approach with Cyrilla. Genderbending smut has a pretty rocky track record when it comes to depicting the trans experience with gravitas, so seeing a dysphoric character treated as more than a fetish object, especially in this setting, is both surprising and heartening. As stated previously, despite the fantastic premise, you don't lose sight of the human element.

Aside: This gives "Angels in America" a whole new meaning.

I am enjoying this story, but feel you need to address the cause of these transformations at some stage. Keep going!

I need more, please post the next part, plweees...

One of the more unique stories I’ve read on Literotica! Please keep going.

I'm loving it do far.

I love this! You make the "normal" parts as rewarding as the naughty bits.