Love Prevails

They packed everything up, went to the airport and caught the plane to Vancouver. Sarah was there at the gate waiting, and they shook hands. Jemaya hated formalities, but accepted it, as they walked to Sophia's car and put their belongings into it. She knew that Sarah's adoptive parents had raised her to be the way she was.

"It's good to see you Sarah," Jemaya said simply, as they drove through the city. She hoped that this visit would be easier than previous visits. All that they seemed to do was fight.

Sarah replied,

"Yeah."

Jemaya and Sophia both began to wonder why the hell Sarah met up with them when it was quite clear that she wanted nothing to do with Jemaya. Perhaps her adoptive parents had urged her to come. She had only seen her a few times, and every time was difficult to say the least. The drive home was uncomfortable, tedious and full of silence.

Sophia could feel Jemaya's disappointment, and knew that she would have to hide her feelings for Olivia. That was the last thing that Jemaya needed right then. Olivia was the only thing that was making her happy again. Sarah had only been part of the cause of Jemaya's depression and seclusion. She was a reminder of the deep guilt and sorrow of her past. She hoped that Sarah wouldn't disrupt Jemaya's new- found happiness.

Olivia woke on the morning of Jemaya's arrival, excited and nervous. She jumped out of bed, took a shower and dug through her clothes to find something to wear. Marie, her new puppy, who had been sleeping on the floor got excited too, and tried to trip Olivia as she walked, making her fumble down the stairs on her way to the kitchen. Olivia fed her, let her outside and made some coffee. She watched Marie running around the yard at full speed, happy to be outside. Wolf was Olivia's totem animal. Her Lakota Grandmother made sure she knew this when she was very young. She had died when Olivia was 6 years old, but she still remembered little bits of time with her. She got lost in the sweet memories, but then the excitement of Jemaya's home coming set in again. She sipped her coffee quickly, cleaned the house thoroughly and smoked many cigarettes. She didn't know what to do with her time. She went to the garden with more coffee, and puttered around until she heard Sophia's car pulling up in the driveway. Olivia wanted her all to herself as soon as Sophia was no longer around. When would that be, she wondered? Oh, the torturous thoughts!

Olivia walked toward the car and saw Sophia, Jemaya and another woman getting out of the car. Jemaya saw her and sent her a loving look. Olivia wanted to make love to her right then and there, but she sensed that it would definitely not be a good thing to try to do so. She decided to be docile around the new woman, not knowing who she was. She wanted to touch Jemaya, kiss her, and she knew that she had to find the energy to hold back.

She walked up to Jemaya, knowing that hugs were always permitted, and embraced her happily.

"Oh! I am so happy to see you Olivia!" she said and looked at the young gorgeous woman whom she loved so much. She gave Olivia a look indicating; beware of this new person.

Olivia wanted to hate the woman for preventing her to show her true feelings for Jemaya.

Jemaya said then,

"This is my daughter, Sarah. She will be here overnight, and will leave with Sophia tomorrow."

Olivia shook her hand and smiled. Sarah seemed very formal, educated, dry, reserved, and yes, very straight. She knew she had to beware of this woman, and knew that making love to Jemaya would be out of the question, as long as Sarah was around. They would have to keep their love a secret.

Olivia looked at Jemaya and said,

"I finished the garden while you were away. I would love for you to see it."

Jemaya smiled and said, with a twinkle in her eye,

"Yes, that would be nice. Maybe tomorrow morning?"

Sophia and Sarah walked into the house and Jemaya said quietly,

"My daughter and I have a lot of talking to do. I hope that you don't mind." Olivia grabbed her bag, and told her that she didn't mind, lying.

They walked into the house and went to the kitchen where Marie greeted them happily. Jemaya struggled, but picked her up hugged her.

"She is so adorable, isn't she?"

"She is, and I love her so much. Thank you Jemaya."

Jemaya put Marie down on the floor and hugged Olivia, not wanting to let her go.

"Sarah and I have an awful lot to heal. I am so sorry that we have to hide our feelings around her. It would only make things worse if she knew right now. I missed you, my love. It will be hard to hide my feelings, I know that," she said in a very quiet voice and kissed Olivia quickly.

Sophia and Sarah came in right after the kiss and Sarah sat down. Sophia looked in the fridge and said that she was going into town for groceries. Olivia decided to take Marie for a walk to give the Mother and Daughter space. She and the dog walked out of the house, watched Sophia leave, and ran into the forest. She loved the serenity of the forest. It always calmed her. She found a spot to sit under a beautiful tree, dappled in many shades of green. Moist, with golden, warm light poking through the treetops. She lit a cigarette and watched Marie playing with a stick, growling and trying to be fierce. Olivia gave some tobacco to the Earth and said a prayer for Jemaya.

When the day began to disappear, Olivia and her new dog walked back to the house. Sophia's car was parked in the driveway, and Olivia began to hear the faint sounds of loud, angry voices. Marie began to whine, looked up at her owner, afraid to go in. Olivia wondered what it was between Jemaya and Sarah that made them so angry at each other. The only thing that she knew, from reading magazines and newspapers was that Jemaya gave a baby up for adoption more than twenty years ago. Jemaya had searched for her, and must have found her, because Sarah was there. Maybe Sarah didn't want to reunite with her real Mother.

Marie and Olivia snuck into the house and went to the stairs. Anger was never something that Olivia was comfortable with. It made her want to run like some wild beast into the forest, to hide. She heard Sarah yell,

"You, Jemaya are a horrible mother! My life was so much better before you and your fucking fame came into it!"

Jemaya, in a quieter, but raised voice said,

"I hear you, and I know all of this hurts right at this point. But, what can I do now? Perhaps I made the wrong choice in finding you, and I am sorry, if that's the case. But you cannot know how much I hurt, for the last 25 years because of the choice that I made. Finding you finally healed some of that pain."

Sarah cut her off, yelling again, so Olivia took Marie upstairs to her room, and fell asleep eventually, wearing earplugs.

Jemaya tried to get through to her daughter all evening, and became so incredibly distressed and exhausted. It was an impossible task, and she realized that she should have never looked for her. It was a selfish act on her part. Sarah was extremely angry, and may never let go of that anger. Her final words before she ran up to her bedroom were, "Fuck off and die!" That was it for Jemaya. She sat in the kitchen and cried alone silently, not wanting to wake anyone. She got up and poured herself a Scotch, downed it and went to her bed, unable to sleep. She tossed and turned, and tossed and turned. Her thoughts drove her crazy all night, not giving her any reprieve. Finally, she got up at around 5 in the morning and found her way to Olivia's bedside and quietly sat next to her. She watched her sleep for a little while until Olivia woke, sensing her there.

Olivia opened her eyes and saw Jemaya sitting beside her smiling and looking like she hadn't slept in days. The early dawn light surrounded her, and she believed for a moment that the woman sitting there was actually an angel, impersonating Jemaya.

Jemaya smiled again and said,

"Watching you sleep has brought me so much stillness. You are so lovely, Olivia. Do you want to show me the garden now?"

Olivia smiled, and saw that the clock said 5:30 AM. She thought it was odd that she was there so early, but she had missed her so much. It was nice to have her there, alone with her.

"I would love to show you the garden," Olivia said, got out of bed and dressed. Jemaya watched her every move and said softly,

"I missed you like I have missed no other. What is this love?" She smiled, grabbed Olivia's hand, and led her quietly outside toward the garden. The morning was beautiful, damp, somewhat misty, with early light shining through the trees.

Olivia thought that Jemaya's mood was odd. She was quiet, and somewhat distant. She realized in that moment, that she was not much older than Sarah. She also realized that it truly didn't bother her. Love was love. One could not shape it and make it one way. It was what it was.

They reached the beautiful garden and Jemaya stopped and looked around in awe. Olivia could see tears in her lovely blue eyes.

"Oh my God, Olivia! You have made it so beautiful! I cannot believe that this place ever existed before! No one has ever created beauty such as this for me. Thank you so much, my love...thank you." She said quietly with her hand on her heart, and then hugged Olivia tightly. She smiled at her tearfully and kissed her strongly. Her passion bubbled over and into her, arousing her incredibly. Olivia pulled her toward a hidden contemplation spot, near the new magnolia tree, and Jemaya attacked her with her love madness again.

"I must have you now!" she said passionately and fumbled with Olivia's clothing. Olivia searched for openings in Jemaya's flowing clothes, and they made love right there blissfully, in their little piece of morning paradise. It was the most beautiful lovemaking Olivia had ever experienced. Songbirds sang all around them, and flowers blessed them with their fresh morning scent. Olivia knew that the elementals were ecstatic at the exciting human love madness that was happening. She could almost see them dancing around them, flying and swirling in love circles.

They knew not how much time had passed, their minds could not focus; they were far too blissed out. They suddenly heard Sarah calling Jemaya's name, and got up incredibly fast. With lightning speed they put their clothes back on. They brushed leaves and dirt off of each other, and walked quickly back to the house. They were careful not to walk too close or touch each other in any way.

Sarah yelled again when she saw them, saying that Jemaya's manager was on the phone. They walked into the kitchen, where Jemaya grabbed the call. Sarah stared at them, wondering what they had been doing. Olivia poured herself a cup of coffee, fed Marie and sat down at the table lighting a cigarette. Jemaya was at the end of her conversation when Sarah asked Olivia,

"Who are you really, and what do you want with Jemaya?"

Olivia told her calmly that she was there to help Jemaya with the house and garden.

Sarah yelled, "Bullshit!"

Jemaya walked in asking, "Bullshit what, Sarah?"

Sarah glared at Olivia and said,

"I don't trust this woman who lives here with you! Do you know anything about her?"

Jemaya unexpectedly lost it at that point, and Marie ran to a far corner of the kitchen to hide. It was funny, strangely enough; Olivia almost wanted to laugh at Marie's flopping body, but realized that Marie was smart, and that she should follow cue.

"What!" Jemaya screamed. "Who the hell do you think you are, telling me who I should or should not trust? This woman here is someone that I love very much, she is honorable and I trust her with my life! You have no right to treat her like shit, she is my guest, and this is my house!"

Sarah got up, kicked her chair across the room, and lunged full force at her mother, screaming,

"I hate you, you fucking bitch!"

Olivia worried about Jemaya and decided to step in, but it was too late. Sarah had already pushed Jemaya and she was falling backwards, and falling fast. Things all of the sudden moved in slow motion and Olivia watched her beloved, out of her reach, falling and clutching her chest. She hit the floor hard and Sarah ran out of the room. Olivia reached for Jemaya and checked her out, finding blood on the back of her head. She heard Sarah call a cab and leave. Olivia didn't know what to do, and looked desperately at Jemaya's pained face.

"Olivia, call the ambulance, my heart hurts so much," she said, kissed her hand and lay back then, looking peaceful. She closed her eyes, and passed out. Olivia knew that shock was setting in, and that she may have a concussion. She held Jemaya's hand and desperately started to pray to whatever Gods or Goddesses were listening. She didn't know what else to do. Sophia ran in, and knew what to do immediately. She called the ambulance and told them to meet their car at the end of the driveway. She grabbed towels from the kitchen; some blankets and asked Olivia if she could carry Jemaya to the car. Sophia had to shake her to do this, because she too had become numb. Olivia snapped out of it, and lifted Jemaya carefully into her arms. They walked to the car and Olivia slid into the back seat carefully with Jemaya in her arms like a sleeping child. Sophia covered them up with blankets, secured Jemaya's head and neck, got into the car and drove quickly down the driveway.

"I just knew that Sarah was bad news!" Sophia said as she sped down the driveway.

Olivia prayed intensely and held one hand on Jemaya's heart and one hand on the back of her head, sending her loving, healing energy. She prayed like she had never prayed before. She felt Jemaya's heart beating, but not regularly. She continued to pray and told her how much she loved her. She begged her not to leave her so soon. She heard the ambulance, and kissed her gently. Sophia stopped the car, and opened the door to let them out. She helped Olivia with Jemaya, and the ambulance attendants took her into the ambulance. Olivia collapsed on the road, feeling able to be fully numb then. Sophia helped her up and placed her gently in the car. They quickly drove to the hospital, and Sophia immediately asked the nurses if they knew anything. They told them that they would be told of any news as soon as they knew.

Olivia guessed that Sophia had the right to know information about Jemaya in a hospital because she was the only one who traveled with her and took care of her personal affairs. They sat in the waiting room and Olivia let go of her tears. Sophia left for a moment and brought a cup of coffee back to Olivia. She handled the nurses, doctors and police. Olivia just watched everything, numb and weeping. She was so thankful that Jemaya had Sophia, and that she was there for her then.

A Doctor came out after a while to deliver Jemaya's prognosis, and did so as if he were some Baptist preacher, delivering the news of God.

"She is stable now, but we could have lost her. She was lucky. Whatever you did for her bringing her to the ambulance is what really saved her. She had a minor heart attack, and the wound on her head was not fatal. We need to keep her here for a few days to monitor her progress. Until she wakes up, we cannot fully know how she is. You can go in and sit quietly with her if you want to. She's been through a lot and probably needs a friend close. She's in Room 47."

Sophia shook his hand, thanked him, and then he left. Sophia looked at Olivia and said,

"Olivia, I believe that she needs your love, and your healing presence right now. You have a gift. I saw it when you were in the backseat with her. Your healing hands, your love and prayers are what saved her. She needs you."

All that Olivia knew was that it was Sophia and her calm knowing that got Jemaya to the ambulance. Her hands and love were not what saved her. Olivia shared her feelings through her tears. Sophia smiled and said,

"You are so humble Olivia. Just go to her, I know that she needs you. Trust me."

Olivia went to the room that Jemaya was in, hooked up to machines and an IV. She walked up to the bed and saw that Jemaya looked so peaceful. She wondered how she could look so serene; Her daughter had almost killed her. She sat on the bed and held her hand. She caressed her hair and studied her features lovingly. She gazed at her high cheekbones, golden skin and her full and lovely lips. She kissed her and told her that she was there for her. She leaned in and whispered in her ear,

"Oh my beloved, I almost lost you. I don't want to lose you, my love; we have only just begun our journey together. I love you so much Jemaya, please take what love and energy you need so you can get well. I will hold your hand, I am here."

She curled up beside her, still holding her hand, and fell asleep quickly, feeling like an emotional wreck. She dreamed about Jemaya, smiling at her, telling her how beautiful the sunrise was. She slept deeply until Sophia woke her up with a coffee at 9:30 AM. She took it with her free hand and sat up. She noticed that Sylvie was there with flowers. She nodded to Olivia and put the flowers on the windowsill in the water jug.

Olivia was too tired from trying to love Jemaya back to wellness, that she didn't notice her usual dizziness when Sylvie was around. Sylvie who saw everything said,

"I knew that you were gifted, but I did not know how much. You are a powerful healer, just like your ancestors were. You saved Jemaya, and no matter how uncomfortable that makes you feel, it is the truth. This is only the beginning." She nodded again, and left.

Olivia found her intensity fascinating, but the chaos she brought with her and the raw power overwhelmed her. She sipped her coffee, and saw Sophia smiling at her.

"See, I told you," she said, giggled and left the room.

Olivia ignored her and took in the peaceful beauty of Jemaya, noticing that her breathing had changed. She asked her if she was okay, to fill the silence. Jemaya's hand moved in hers, making Olivia almost jump out of the bed in excitement. She calmed herself quickly and began to stroke her hair to let her know that she was there. Her hand moved again, and squeezed Olivia's hand with a light strength.

"Jemaya, I'm here. It's Olivia," she said to her, trying not to cry.

Jemaya opened her eyes and looked at Olivia blankly, trying to adjust her eyes to the light. She was confused and disoriented, not understanding where she was and why she felt so terrible.

"Where am I?" she asked Olivia quietly.

Olivia stroked her hair some more, careful of her head bandage, and told her what had happened.

Jemaya relaxed a bit, starting to remember everything slowly. She didn't want to believe her memories, but she knew that they spoke of the truth.

The Doctor came in suddenly, walked to the other side of the bed and said,

"Hello Ms. Wolf! How are you feeling?" He checked the monitors and took her blood pressure.

"My head hurts!"

"Well, we can remedy that!" He turned the dial up, sending painkillers instantly into her bloodstream.

"I want to go home."

"Oh no, we still have to keep an eye on you. Maybe tomorrow," he said, patted her hand and left. Olivia hated Doctors. They seemed to have no feelings whatsoever.

Jemaya started to cry as she remembered everything, so Olivia curled up beside her weeping lover.

Olivia knew that she was remembering all that had happened. She wished that she could take her pain away, but emotional heart wounds like this shaped a person in their grieving. She could only be there for her, and love her with all of her might. Jemaya eventually fell asleep and slept the day away, and Olivia slept with her through the night.

Sophia checked in on Jemaya and Olivia sometime in the night, and saw how sweet they looked, curled up to each other. She was so happy that Olivia had shown up in Jemaya's life. She wished that someday she could find that kind of love.