Made for Eve

"Yes, we have a great friendship as well." She gets up again. "But Eve is the only one that can make you feel better this time. I promise."

She leaves without another word, while I sit with thousands of them running through my mind.

******

Rae looks less than excited to see me midweek.

"I need you to make five copies of this document and make a dinner reservation for all the department heads this afternoon." She spews more orders as I write them down on my little pad.

My mind is working at half of its capacity.

I try to be diligent and ignore any heartaches that try to rear in my mind as I work throughout the day. Instead, I distract myself with thoughts of leaving this place for good. I finally admit to myself that I hate it here. That I always have and I always did. No matter how hard I worked in the past, Rae never seemed to be happy. I always gave a lot more than I received and it was only when I started making minor mistakes that I was recognized by her in the worst ways possible.

I think about Lori's words of advice.

In instances like this, I do want to close myself off and just roll with the punches. I want to go back to doing better but there is no reward in that. Rae will still distrust me and think I'm an idiot. If she hasn't fired me yet, it is probably because she hasn't found a replacement. I can't keep letting my life pass me by while I sit back and wait for change to happen. I need to do something the same way I decided to move here. Otherwise, I am on the verge of repeating the same mistakes of letting others guide my choices and be content instead of taking charge and making my own happiness.

To hell with feeling secure.

I want to feel happy.

And I need to start by leaving this place.

******

My small fist is hanging midair.

My feet are stuck in place outside of Eve's apartment.

It has been over two weeks since the last time that we saw each other. I said stupid things and made her feel awful while breaking my own heart in the process. She had no idea what was running through my mind that night and I need to explain myself once and for all. Not because I have some crazy notion that we will frolic into the sunset if I am honest with her. But because I owe it to myself, and to her, to voice my concerns. Otherwise, I will keep living life, worried about everyone else's thoughts and feelings while I drown in my own silence.

If I am working towards becoming happier with my life, I need to start at the root of it.

With the one person who has given me a very generous dose of happiness.

I knock, three times.

She answers after a few moments.

She's wearing leggings and a thin crop top. Her hair is up in a small bun, little strands framing her face. She looks surprised to see me but moves aside so that I can walk in. I try not to pull my shirt down, not knowing what to do with my hands as I walk over to her couch. We sit across from each other.

Her eyes roam my face once she settles. Her face is stoic. No emotion coming from it, her guard is up.

I bite my lip, rethinking everything that brought me here.

"Would you like something to drink?" She stands and moves to the kitchen.

I stay seated. "Water is fine."

She comes back with a beer for herself and a glass of water for me.

"I'm very surprised to see you here." She takes a gulp of her beer.

My eyes trail down her neck, watching the drink flow down her throat.

"I've had some time to think." I clear my throat. This is as awkward as I expected it to be. For some reason, that comforts me. Gives me a sense of control if I know how things will play out. "I wanted to apologize for that night and for how things ended."

She takes another drink, not meeting my eye but still listening.

"I acted very immaturely and I should have reached out sooner."

She puts her drink down and leans her arm against the cushion behind her. She shifts so that she is facing me.

I get this urge to crawl over and sit on her lap. What would her reaction be if I did that?

"Is that all?" She's picking at the little fluffs on her couch with her fingers.

"No," My hands start to shake. I don't know if I can do this. In my mind, she was going to be happy to see me. She doesn't look happy. She doesn't even look upset. Am I interrupting her day? Maybe she already had plans and I'm ruining them by being here. I'm being inconsiderate. "I-" I bite my lip again, not sure how to continue.

We continue to stare at each other in silence. My eyes are wide, asking for a lifesaver.

"Come," She moves around on the couch so that her feet are planted on the floor, legs spread apart. She points to the spot between her legs.

I stare down at the spot, immediately wanting to go there. But my body doesn't move. Because if I do, I don't think I will get to say any of the words I've been memorizing for the last few weeks.

"Or would you rather I fuck you into submission?" She lifts a brow.

I press my legs together. I must be depraved. Because yes, I would rather that very much. But I need to talk first.

I move slowly, getting on the floor and crawling to the spot between her legs.

She grabs my hair, wrapping it around her hand, and moves closer to the edge of the couch.

"You can tell me to stop anytime you want me to, you understand?" Her voice is rough.

I nod, knowing that unless I felt unsafe, which I never would around her, I will never stop her.

She pulls my face between her legs. My nose digs into her heated center, and I close my eyes, inhaling her sweet scent.

"Do you smell how horny I am because of you?" She digs my nose deeper and I moan, wanting to remove the layer of clothing between her pussy and my face. "You come here, looking so pretty and fuckable. Open your eyes, look at me."

I force my eyes open and look up at her. She pulls my head back slightly and then presses my lips to her pussy. I groan and stick my tongue out, not caring that I'm licking her through her leggings. I want her. So bad. Fuck, how did I go this long without her?

"I hope you came here knowing that I am not letting you go." Her hand tightens in my hair and I continue licking, digging my tongue deeper. She grunts. "You're my needy little whore, aren't you."

I nod, not bothering to pretend that I have any reserves when it comes to our relationship. I am what she wants me to be. Because she is who I need her to be.

"Look at you, getting my leggings wet with your spit." She pulls me back, away from her, and I moan in protest.

"Please," I beg.

"What do you want?" Her jaw sets, waiting for my next words.

"Take your leggings off," I breathe hard. "Please!"

She doesn't give me a reaction but removes them and her underwear off. Her pussy glistens as I stare down at it. My mouth waters and I want to dig in. My face moves forward but she takes a tighter hold on my hair. I can't get close enough.

"Please," I beg as I look up at her.

I need this.

"Why are you here? Why are you really here?" Her eyes are burning.

"I can't stay away." I shake my head. "I need you."

"Why?" She moves my face an inch closer to her dripping center.

"Because..." My cheeks flare and I feel my mouth close in protest. I want her. I need her. I just told her so. Isn't that enough?

"Because?" She is defiant.

"Why are you doing this?" My eyes drop lower in resignation. Maybe I am the only one of the two who feels such strong feelings. Otherwise, I wouldn't have to explain them to her.

"Look at me." She tugs on my hair.

I do.

"You're my pretty little slut, do you understand?"

I nod. My pussy clenches.

"I'm your pleasure domme." She states.

I nod again.

"If we continue like this tonight, I will never let you go. Do you understand, Brianna?" Her words hit home.

She's not saying them because she knows the effect that they have on me. She's saying them because she means them. She is mine and I am hers.

She is mine.

I nod eagerly and she presses my face to her pussy.

I lap at her warm center, letting her ride my face and pull me in whatever direction she needs so that she can find pleasure. Her moans are loud and she doesn't hold back. Her juices gush against my nose and my lips and my chin. She fucks my tongue, urging me to speed up. When I do, she cums all over my face, calling me her pretty slut, her wanton whore. I thrill at her words, at her touch, at her taste.

She slows enough to give me room to catch my breath. Her hand loosens in my hair and then she pulls me up, kissing me and making me straddle her lap. I moan against her lips, loving the feel of her arms around my waist.

"You're so perfect for me, Bri. Can't you see that?" She licks her juices from my chin and digs her tongue into my mouth. She pulls back and looks up at me. "I'll never want anyone else for as long as I live."

I stare down at her, my hair making a curtain around us. "How do you know?" How can she be so sure?

"I haven't been seeing anyone after our first session." She runs a finger down my cheek. "You have always been the forbidden fruit. I've always wanted a taste but never thought I would get the chance. And when I took that first bite, I knew it was game over for me." She pulls my chin down for a kiss. "You're a natural submissive."

I get concerned about hearing that. Am I a pushover? Is that why she likes me?

"It is a wonderful thing." She brushes her thumb against my brows. "You like to please me. You like to follow my orders. And you have just as much power as I do in this relationship."

I look at her dubiously.

"This would have never happened if you didn't take that first step. If you asked me to stop anytime, I would have. You have been calling the shots, I've just been enjoying myself along the way." She kisses me again. "I've done things and said things in the past with clients but I've never called any of them mine. Someone can be a whore or a slut, but I've never called them my whore or my slut. You are mine. Do you get it?"

I nod, staring deep into her eyes, loving every second of her admission.

"You can't tell me you've felt anything like this before. Your eyes light up when I give you words of encouragement. You care about my pleasure just as much as I care about yours. We're perfect together, baby."

I lean in and kiss her this time. Because she is reaffirming everything I've been feeling this whole time. Everything I couldn't voice out loud, she was already feeling and understanding. She does get me. She understands me more than I do if I'm being honest. But that doesn't scare me because I know she will never use it against me. As she said, I have as much power as she does.

"What are you thinking?" She pulls me closer to her.

"I don't know why I waited so long." I shake my head. "If you knew, why didn't you just say something?"

This is what Lori was referring to. Lori knew how Eve felt about me. Am I the only one who was too unaware to realize it? Lori said she was surprised Eve went for it. But it turns out I was the one who had to go for it first. God, just the thought of there never being an us, turns my stomach.

"You had to come to terms with it yourself." She puts a strand of hair behind my ear. "I knew what I wanted. I was just waiting to see if you wanted it to."

"I do," I nod, more confident in myself. "I want you."

She chuckles. "Thank God." She kisses me. "It only took countless times of getting you to admit it in bed, but I'm glad you've come to terms with it now." She teases.

I blush and shrug. "It was just so hard to believe you wanted me just as much."

"You have no idea, but I will make sure that by the end of the night, you do." She pulls me down again, making me forget myself.

Making me push any doubts out of my mind and open my body and heart to her. Because if there is one thing I've learned from Eve, it is that there is power in allowing myself to give up control. She loves me in her way and I will always love her in mine. Words don't have to be exchanged to acknowledge that. We are made for each other and no one can take that away from us. From this moment forward, I will give myself over to her with no reservations and actively work to make us both happy. Because I now know that my happiness is linked to her. And her happiness is based on mine. We're on our own virtuous cycle and I will never have it any other way.