by jack_straw
excelent story line and character(ok i cant spell)build up.flowed smoothly- though i was watching a movie of the week!!!. one of the better stories i read here.
The idea of the crush being fulfilled is one of my weaknesses. Just the right amount of romance to turn this into more than just a masturbation inspiration.
I liked the flow of the story and the finality of realizing the crush and the coming together in the end. Keep writing!
Jack,
This one is great, and I have liked most of your stories. You hit some areas that are close to my heart. A girl in high school had a crush on me and somehow we never got together, I found out at the ten year reunion, but we were both married and I at least still am , don't know about her. Oh well life goes on. I also spent a bit of time in New London for school before going to a sub in Norfolk in 77. SSN 679 Been there, done that!
The pace, character development and mood was fantastic. The verbage sensuous and rich...sexy and tastefully executed. Definitely on the nerve of everyone who wonders about what 'could have been' with someone in their past. Keep writing!
Sweet story well written. It's nice to read a story without a lot of heartache and angst. I was really happy for Maggie and Nickie and the love they had for each other.
Good job.
This is a story of true romance. Of "puppy" love that blossomed into true love. The story is somewhat predictable by page 2, but who cares? I'd ask for more, but this is a once in a lifetime story. But perhaps the story of their honeymoon comes next?
A very well done story, I loved the emotions of both Maggie and Nicky, compared to just two strangers going at it.
Fantastic writing, great emotional writing and overall amazing storyline - But I must say that, after the fourth paragraph, the ending was all too predictable (As was the rest of the content).
Regardless, it was a very nice read and a fine piece of literature.
If I may suggest two things?
1) Don't go with the norm. Cliches aren't always good.
2) Work on the details a tad bit more. I know it's good to leave a lot for the imagination, but I couldn't help but notice that the car "Scene" sometimes made no sense and that from the parked car they suddenly appeared at the door.
I know, it can be tedious and long to write every single detail... But once you get into the moment, you won't be able to stop.
Anyways, fantastic work and I bet there's more to come from you!
Needed this story after the day I've had. Pretty cool that your writing is medicinal eh!
Again,nice sentiment and delivery,liked hearing a tale of respect and desire told so eloquently. Bravo.
Such a lovely lil story. I had a crush like this when I was in high school but was never able to act on it; she was the Supers daughter and I was to f'n shy. Like Maggie; I always knew that Michelle was worth everything ( including her weight in Unobtainium from Pandora "Avatar"). I went into the Marines; she graduated a year later and moved away never to be sen again.
Beautiful story! Been there. Her name was Wendy. But no such happy ending. She was just short of seventeen years old when she was taken from me. Leukemia.
This the 3rd time I've come across this gem during the past several years and I still enjoy the hell out of it! Nothing as good as a story with likable characters,just enough sex to make it exciting and,of course,a happy ending! One of my favorites at Literotica! 5+