All Comments on 'Mall BBW'

The description of the initial part of the encounter was fascinating. The premise of the story had great possibilities. Yet, as happens so many times on Literotica, you seemed to get in a hurry to finish the story and it deteriorated into a typical male D/s fantasy...Strip, spank, lick, suck.

Few true dommes would spank a sub and subsequently give him a blowjob. True subs rarely get to cum at the hands of their mistress.

Sadly, the adult toy section of the store provided so many possibilities for the story...Dildos, butt plugs, straps, cuffs, nipple clamps...All missed.

Had I been Evelyn, I would have paddled David and while his penis was flaccid from the pain of the spanking, placed him in a chastity device. Only then would he have been allowed to use his tongue on me.

His final humiliation of the day would have come with David on his hands and knees, ass in the air and anus exposed while Evelyn used a long, thick middle finger or rubber prostate massager (Another missed opportunity from the toy section) to express all of the seminal fluid from his prostate with a lot of harmless, but humiliating discomfort, accompanied by David's pathetic begging and pleading and none of the pleasure of an orgasm.

He would have then been allowed to dress with chastity device in place and wearing Evelyn's panties and instructed to return at a future time for more discipline.

You have the skills required to construct a truly edgy and entertaining D/s story...Just take your time and pay attention to detail.

H-m-m-m-m...Maybe you need a spanking, a finger up your butt, and a little chastity time...Would that make you more interested in writing well?

The first comment was well thought out but critical of the ending. I see it as start to something even bigger than the "Duplex" series. As far as the suggestions go, fetish likes/dislikes vary in the extreme so keep it going with YOUR fantasy. (Continue to share of course) You have been missed.

Not bad, but not that good like Duplex storie. It was similiar. anyhow will be interesting watch how it will develop

Excellent story. Love all aspects. One suggestion. Given her large size, wide hips, and age, (and probable extensive sexual experience) she probably has a large vagina. I think the large size of her pussy, much like her weight, would be something she might on some level feel some shame about, but which David would find dominating and make her more of a Goddess in his eyes - and she might use it as a way to belittle is small cock and justify the need for him to provide her with other things such as a good supply of oral. Also, it would be so hot if Evelyn made David call her Mommy while she is dominating him. Great story!

This is the first time I've had the pleasure of reading one of your stories and you have great promise! I too share a fascination for large shapely women. The way you bring these two together was nicely done. I do however agree with another comment that you could have spent much more time developing her domination over him. I also agree that she really should not be giving him a bj, at least not so soon. Making him masturbate for her and then "checking his prostate" to be sure he was empty. Perhaps "employing" him at her store where he could be forced to demonstrate all manner of devices for her "special" customers. Just thinking about all the possibilities in this little world you've created is making me so excited I've just got to finish the job. Thanks!!!

Please tell me there is more to c9me this is a great story

This got me very hard

Please write more

L O R

Funny, I am on the petite size myself but from some stroke of luck, I carry 8" of cock. Looks even larger on my small build. I love ladies who spank, however, just like this one. Keep up the good work.

I'd better lok for Evelyn's store immediately.

Please continue this intriguing story.

(Often123)

Hot story. Similar to your duplex story which I loved. Need more! Thanks!

Totally awesome story!

Wow! Evelyn sounds like a dream and I'm hoping she gets even more adventurous in future episodes! 5 stars!