All Comments on 'Manny Ch. 01'

Great story, but it should have been proofread first.

Who the fuck is Ethan?

enough said

I thought the story was going along very well until the main characters name changedand the rediculous description of his "ramrod". Does anyone realize that a 12 inch long 6 inch in diameter penis would tear a virgin apart. A females vaginal canal is only between 5 and 6 inches long. I just wish people would pay more attention to reality when describing the male anatomy.

Despite the small errors (Manny's name changes to Ethan at the end) this is a well-writen, hot erotic story. Rape is not easy to write about but there seems to be a romantic, sexually charged undercurrent in this story that makes it interesting. Real characters drawn from real life, great vocabulary and descriptions. I can't wait to read Chapter 2.

You've left your readers a bit confused here...Manny? or Ethan??

It was a good story, but.........the name change and a couple of grammatical errors threw me off. "She cummed in her hand" for example.

Not a bad story, interesting story line, but the main character's name changed from Manny to Ethan in the middle of the story, kinda threw off the groove. . .