Marcie and Leo Ch. 020

(It's hard to believe I started telling the story of Leo and Marcie almost a year ago. Thank you to the readers who motivate me to submit my story as well as the "Marcie" in my life who is continually providing me with inspiration to keep writing. Baby, you're the best!!)

I am constantly writing about the good days when Marcie and I are together. It does seem to be a false sense that we don't have our difficulties or that we're a "Barbie and Ken". Truth is, we struggle just like any other couple. We have our disagreements and our share of bad days. The big thing is through it all, we strive to be honest with each other and be as supportive as possible.

It was one such bad day that was rapidly approaching when Marcie started to retreat to her bubble. It was the anniversary of her late husband's passing. One of the things I had learned regarding this situation was to go against my instinct to be the hero. I took a few days off work and started to be more helpful around the house. I tried to be extra aware of her and providing the support she needed. Her bubble was a barrier she placed around herself that she uses to get through whatever is messing with her mood. It was when it was the day prior that I screwed up.

"Beautiful, did you want me to drive you to Mitchell's spot tomorrow?"

I asked it in honest desire to help her. There was an utter silence before her eyes flashed. She was about to yell at me for sure before she was able to stop and take a breath. Then, she rushed forward into my waiting arms and collapsed. I held her as her body shook. Tears were saturating my t-shirt as I just stood there being her rock. It was as she was about to collapse to the floor that I guided her to the new couch. She felt the fabric she picked out and was distracted for a moment before she looked at me.

"Does it ever get easier?" she asked.

I looked at her and shook my head. Both of us survived the death of our spouses prior to getting together ourselves. She was my rock through the month prior to her husband's passing. This was one of those moments we dealt with countless times. It was there as I held her on the couch that I began to rub her back. She pressed herself against me tighter.

"Hold me, Leo. I'm sorry I'm being..."

"Human?" I ask.

She looked up at me before smiling a bit.

"We've done this a bunch, haven't we?" she asked.

'It's one reason we're getting better at supporting each other like this, Sweetheart."

We stayed there on the couch until it was getting closer to dinner time. I went ahead and called Sal's to get a pizza delivered to keep us both from losing it. The driver was quick. I tipped him and started to set the table before she walked over and wrapped her arms around my chest. She pressed herself into my back and held me for a bit before she let me go enough for me to turn around and hold her against my chest.

The rest of the night was quieter. We ate dinner and cleaned up the dishes before retiring to the living room to watch some television. To help her, I watched what she wanted to watch even though it was a bit scarier than I was used to. Still, we enjoyed each other's company before we retired to the bedroom to sleep. Holding her in my arms felt better that night because I felt like she could feel me there.

When we woke up the next morning, I watched as she put on a sundress to go see Mitchell. I hesitated only because I wanted to make sure she wanted me to come along. When she started to pull out clothes for me to put on, I started to get dressed before she looked at me and smiled.

"I'm sorry I almost ripped your head off about driving there," she whispered.

"I'm sorry I tried to pop the bubble early," I countered.

We held each other again, this time sharing a few soft kisses before we adjourned to the kitchen to make some coffee before leaving in her car to go to the cemetery. One would think that as many times as we have visited our spouses that the trip would get easier. It still feels tense. The sight of their names in the marble is a sobering thought to us that they're gone. I let her walk to the stone first. As she always did, she knelt by the stone and started to talk to it as if it were Mitchell. She spent a good ten minutes talking to him, pouring her heart out of how much she missed him. She told him about the new living room furniture and how similar he and I were when it came to our punching the bag. At the end, she kissed her hand and rubbed it along the stone before she walked back into my arms. I held her for a bit before she smiled.

"Shall we go visit Missy?" she asked.

I let her drive me to Missy's stone. As I did for her, she watched as I walked to the stone and knelt beside it. I started to talk to Missy, letting her know how much I missed her and how Marcie was helping take care of me. I kissed her stone before I stood and walked back to Marcie. I turned and saw the ray of sunlight poke through the clouds, lighting up the vase that I put fresh flowers in every time I would visit. The sight of this made me smile before looking at my wife and admiring hers.

We drove home, feeling better about allowing each other the space to grieve. The true test of a relationship isn't how strong it is when the sun is shining, but how hard it holds when it starts to rain. Marcie and I have been through much since we started being together and the fact we're still together makes me feel like the luckiest guy on the planet.