All Comments on 'Maria the Hucow'

There was some stuff I wanted to see like Ulf wondering where Maria went and the town searching for her. But overall, good story. I like it and I'm looking forward to more.

You really need a proofreader. There are people here on Literotica that will gladly do this for no charge for you. Small, but distracting things like "Jet" instead of "Yet" which is what you should have used. You used "Lead" as a past tense when "Led" would have been correct. There are others, but nothing a proofreader couldn't have picked up on quickly. I really like the story. It is a little shallow. The Witch is not involved much. There is more to be explored here. Does Maria's little sister end up going to the Witch also? Since the Cheese and Milk are so superior that come from Maria, does Ulf supply the King exclusively with these products and recieve special recognition? Maybe a Royal Warrant? Does Maria's Father ever find about the story of Maria's whereabouts and what does he do? Is he pleased that she has found the life she desires, the man she loves, and supplies Dairy products to the King which pleases Him and gains favor for their City?

I love the idea of this story, totally different fantasy with a weird magical twist. The only criticism I have is that you rushed your way through the story. It felt as though you were bullet pointing the whole story. Also the word is Yet not jet. Other than that it was a fun story. Maybe relax your writing style a bit more add more detail and build a bit more suspense and you will have a great erotica short.