Maximum Badonkadonk Ch. 02

(RECAP: The Aftermath of a Prank Most Foul)

"Chill Mintzy; I'm feeling a little faded."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just let me sit down for a minute." I was feeling queasy as Mintzy knelt there taking stock of the situation. She looked genuinely concerned for my welfare. I sat on the open toilet staring at my dirty bathroom hookup.

"Aw goddammit to hell; Renee done gone too fucking far with them stupid ass pranks!! Now my baby can't like, close the deal and everything. Well, lucky for you I ain't come empty handed or nothing."

"Huh?"

"Well I used to study a bit of nursing before I got myself married and all with Bruno; so I know a few things brotha."

"What, uh no Mintzy, please." She was already righting herself.

"Now don't you go giving me no lip; I'm petty good about all this medical stuff. I kinda figured you'd be like, internally compromised, so I bought a little something with me from the store." I wasn't liking the sound of this at all. Mintzy was pulling her skirt awkwardly up, huge breasts dangling right before my eyes.

"Please god no, Mintzy." My stomach was starting to act up as she slipped back into her top failing to notice it was inside out.

"Shut up your mouth kid; I ain't gonna hurt you none; I admit I was a little selfish wanting mine before helping you out. We've gotta get you squared away and all, okay?"

She didn't care that I was shaking my head profusely in the negative. The smile on her face was supposed to be reassuring, but I had a difference of opinion as she unlocked the door giving me a glimpse of a plastic bag hanging on the outside handle.

"Mintzy I think I would like to go to a medical facility, if you don't mind?"

"You don't need no fucking hospital brotha, it's real simple you see; we just gotta empty you out. So, it's either an enema or you walking around for the rest of the day in a diaper." She produced a small box containing her boorish suggestion with every intent of using it whether I liked it or not.

"Fuck me stupid."

"Don't worry about it; I used to do this all the time for my uncle Sal when he got himself backed up." Mintzy grinned opening the box.

"This ain't over." I didn't mean it towards Mintzy.

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MAXIMUM BADONKADONK Ch. 02

Featuring: Shawnee Thompson a.k.a Ms. WTF?!! (34A-32-??)

Forty five minutes later I was considerably some pounds lighter thanks to the "assistance" of Mintzy standing outside the apartment building of my other future superstar, still bristling at the humiliation I'd received. On my way over I'd checked the released teaser and short clip of Ms. WTF finding them keeping pace with Chi Town Thunda. I already knew what I was doing and eager to get more content back up for the launch of my site.

I checked my messages again finding nothing from either of the two women who'd made my life miserable today. Seems like they were laying low which puzzled me because I didn't figure Renee to be the type. She usually came on like gang busters several steps ahead of her target before making the first move. This should've worried me, but I had righteous indignation on my side as I dialed up Shawnee.

"What's up?" She sounded like she hadn't moved since we'd spoken earlier in the day.

"Hey, I'm outside; is it okay to come over?"

"Shit man, I thought you were flaking on me." Her voice sounded glib, but I was starting to realize it was part of her self defense mechanism. I figured that few took Shawnee seriously and were shocked when she actually meant business.

"Not even, just got sidetracked for a hot minute."

"You fuck your girlfriend?"

"What girlfriend?" Shawnee was an unapologetic hen to the hilt, always fishing for information.

It was an undesirable trait, but I'd inadvertently opened the door to her query by stunting the first time we met. Shawnee laughed at my response. I could hear a television playing in the background affirming her as a sedentary creature of habit. It was something I'd deal with for the time being to get content. My stomach was still queasy from "food poisoning" making it unlikely that I'd get any footage of the boy girl variety.

"I bet you end up fucking that girl."

"Oh yeah, why's that?"

"Because you guys are in love." Shawnee laughed, weakly hiding her fishing attempt.

"Uh whatever; so am I coming inside or we just having a phone conversation?"

"Chill, come on inside." She abruptly hung up leaving me staring at her apartment building from the opposite of the street. The place looked no less sketchy and urban dangerous, but I had money to make in no uncertain terms.

There was a security door that led into the building that I found criminally ajar. It looked like someone battered the heavy reinforced door with a bludgeon of some sort. There was a thick glass window in the door covered with mesh wiring that was fractured and crumbling, but I pushed inside walking up the short stairs to Shawnee's apartment. I wondered if I'd have to split time between her and Porsha Simms, an earlier "starlet" discovered through a relative. I knocked on the door finding it unlocked prior to my arrival.

"Hey, its me; can I come inside Shawnee?"

"OPEN THAT DOOR FOOL!!" I did a doubletake thinking she was feeling herself already. It was triggering after what I'd gone through earlier. Before I could lose it, the door was quickly yanked open providing me with instant shock and a fight or flight reflex.

"Oh uh, shit."

I found myself looking directly at the chiseled chest and twelve pack abdomen of a guy at least a head taller than my cousin Jaquan. This guy was really dark skinned and cut all over with defined sinewy arms born in a gym. I had to look up at his face which was surprisingly juvenile with a barely there five o'clock shadow. A do-rag bandana covered his smallish head which was adorned with a innocuous stony expression.

"ANDRE, GET YOUR ASS OUT THE DOOR AND LET HIM COME IN HERE!!"

Shawnee yelled from her perpetual perch on the couch. I could feel a wall of humidity wafting from the small apartment along with a musty odor as I realized this guy was only wearing a pair of boxer briefs.

"Sorry sir; my bad."

"It's cool, it's just a business meeting uhm, Andre?" I offered my hand because I felt it was the respectable thing to do. He shook it gingerly as I noticed how small my hand looked in comparison to his own.

"He ain't my fucking husband." Shawnee laughed at our exchange as I cautiously stepped inside.

There was a bit of déjà vu as entered the apartment indeed finding Shawnee Thompson reclining on the couch in her cramped living room. The omnipresent odor of marijuana intermingled with everything else making me a bit queasy as I entered the living room planting my camera bag on the coffee table next to a large hookah pipe.

There were several bags of takeout and other snacks littering the table along with a few beers. Continuing the familiar tone was the big baggy, extra-large fleece sweats hiding her body. This time her clothes were a magenta tone while her surprisingly tiny feet were bare. Andre was still loitering by the door almost as if waiting for further orders.

"Andre close my fucking door before the landlord show up; you been sniffing around here all morning!!"

"Uh, okay Shawnee." He answered in a deferent baritone voice. I stood at the edge of the closest love seat noticing what I assumed were Andre's discarded clothes littering the cushions.

"Hey bruh, chill out right here." Shawnee motioned over her shoulder towards the ratty looking sofa lining the wall under her picture window. I shifted over taking my bag along sneaking a peek outside noticing that she could've been watching me from her window.

"I'm not interrupting anything, am I?" I had to ask as Andre hung near the edge of the living room watching both of us almost in this trance like state, facially.

"We already fucked man, we probably gonna fuck after you leave too; why you acting all sketchy?"

"I'm not acting sketchy; it's just a question Shawnee." She shifted on the couch into a reclining Buddha pose grinning at me in juvenile fashion.

"Hey man, Andre is my FWB dick on call nigga; we ain't dating no more, but he can't leave the ass alone. We have an understanding; -AIN'T THAT RIGHT ANDRE?!!"

"Uh yeah, Shawnee." He answered sullenly, nothing else changing in his general expression. I kept him in my peripheral view still unsure how he might react to our business arrangement.

"We go all the way back to high school, bruh. HEY ANDRE, TELL THIS NIGGA WHAT THEY USED TO CALL ME IN SCHOOL!!" I wondered if the man was partially deaf or something because she yelled when addressing him directly.

"AA." He responded scratching his temple, quizzically.

"TELL HIM WHAT THAT SHIT STAND FOR ANDRE!!" A forced smile spread across his face as he put his hands on his hips.

"ALL ASS!!" Andre responded enthusiastically.

"That's right because it's true my nigga; and it's all this ASS that's gonna get me the bag cause I ain't and I can't do no motherfucking nine to five!! I ain't built for that shit, but I'm built to last!! AINT THAT RIGHT ANDRE?!!"

"FUCKING A, YOU RIGHT SHAWNEE!!" He chuckled becoming more lively making me at ease a bit more.

"AMEN!!"

I realized Shawnee was faded which brought out the more thuggish aspects of her personality. Her own slightly juvenile features were disarming, and her hair was done up in two tight braids on either side of her head that reached to her neck. Fully clothed there was an argument to made that she was little more than a blob, but I knew what was hidden underneath.

Shawnee a.k.a. Ms. WTF was holding in no uncertain terms and a goldmine that I wanted to use as a counterbalance to Rashida Sikes a.k.a Chi Town Thunda. It was fully my intent to be Don King in this situation and reassert my dominance. After this afternoon, I was gonna push things to the limit.

"Hey uhm, I just noticed Porsha's not here; is she sleep in the back?"

"Hell no, I kicked her ass out last week."

"Why?" Shawnee looked at me eyebrow raised, smirk forming.

"Bitch owe me money." I burst into much needed laughter with Andre following suite seconds later. He'd become comfortable enough to take a seat adjacent to me on the other little couch. I wished he'd become relaxed enough to put his clothes on.

"Why am I not surprised; she owe everybody some fucking money." I commented.

"Yeah she so goddamn shady, I had to keep patting her down for my shit. Fuck, she tried some unsanctioned use of my FWB on some old sorry ass shit, too!! Look at his dumb ass sitting over there like he wasn't down to fuck her big dusty titties!! DON'T PLAY STUPID ANDRE; YOU GOT BUSTED!!"

"But Shawnee, she said we could make some money."

"FUCK ANDRE, YOU A GODDAMN HEAD CHEESE; SHE WASN'T GONNA PAY YOU NO HUNDRED DOLLARS, FOOL!!" I was uncomfortable with her weed addled scolding of a grown man.

"Wait, what?" I interjected, curious.

"Yeah she thought I was sleep, right; so, Porsha knew this dumb nigga got two peas inside his empty head!! Told him that she'd give him a hundred to fuck for that pay site you posted her shit on, bruh. She probably would've got away with it too if this nigga wasn't stupid as fuck!! He couldn't even hold her phone right to film that dumb ass shit!!"

"Oh really?" I wasn't surprised that Ms. Simms had gone into business for herself with predictable results.

"Yeah, I busted her putting hands on my dick!!"

"She said she was gonna give me a hundred." Andre mumbled.

"DID YOU GET A HUNDRED ANDRE?!!"

"No."

"THEN SHUT THE FUCK UP NIGGA!!"

"Hey guys focus; so did Porsha post any more stuff on her page?"

"HELL NO!!" Shawnee yelled obviously in her feelings.

"Why not?"

"BECAUSE I ERASED THAT SHIT; DUMBASS LEFT HER FUCKING PASSWORD ON MY PHONE BECAUSE HER SERVICE GOT CUT OFF!!" I couldn't help chuckling at the fallout of two friends.

"How much she owe you, Shawnee?"

"Fifty dollars."

"FIFTY DOLLARS?!!" I burst into laughter expecting her to make some monetary quote in the hundreds or more. Porsha Simms was a deadbeat, but I found her reaction excessive. So, it had to be more because of Andre than anything else.

"I don't care if it was five dollars, I still want my money!" Shawnee looked embarrassed.

"So, Andre is your man, right?"

"No, FWB nigga."

"Stop calling me that word; matter of fact you call me Mister D."

"What?"

"That's my director name from now on Shawnee, Mister D." It was her turn to laugh and chuckle. She had this sort of chirpy, nerdy laughter while Andre continued chortling as well.

"MAN YOU AIN'T NO MISTER D; FUCKING ANDRE OVER THERE IS A FUCKING MISTER D!!" Shawnee teased.

"Well, that's my name."

"You should call yourself, Sir Average homeboy!"

"Excuse you?"

"YOU PACKING THIRTEEN INCHES, HUH NIGGAAA?!!" Shawnee was out of pocket, but I wasn't keen on making any more enemies right away. I knew I had to bury my ego and ride it out as Shawnee coughed a bit thumping her chest with her fist. Andre was at her side in a moment patting her on the back, helping her sit upright.

"Sorry, man." Andre apologized with something akin to embarrassment reading on his face.

"It's cool; you guys really just friends with benefits?"

"YEAH, I TOOK HIS CHERRY TOO, DIDN'T I, ANDRE?!!" Shawnee was making both of us uncomfortable.

"Well she did; we broke up after that and now we uhm, friends and stuff." I realized I was speaking with a gentle giant.

"Shawnee, why did you get mad at him for fucking Porsha?"

"CAUSE HE DIDN'T CLEAR THAT SHIT WITH ME!!"

"But you're just friends, so that means he can fuck whoever he wants; unless you like him?" I was intentionally playing devil's advocate. Shawnee side eyed her friend zoned beau, face flushed from too much partying before craning her head in my direction, scoffing.

"Ain't no bitch got what I got; he ain't gonna find another one like me-ALL ASS!!"

Her bravado was all over the place giving me the opening I'd been looking for after a day of humiliation.

"I don't know about that Shawnee." Her eyes narrowed.

"MAN, YOU TRIPPING!!" Shawnee laughed in my face as I took the opportunity to call up Rashida's recent teaser on my phone. Instead of handing her the phone, I handed it to Andre.

The effect was immediate with his eyes going wide. I had the volume up allowing the thunderous sound of Chi Town Thunda's enormous ass cheeks to permeate the small, cramped living room. I knew what I was doing taking her inebriated condition into consideration. I was using another woman's huge ass to conduct a pissing contest with my arrogant discovery.

On my phone screen, Rashida Sikes had been slathered with baby oil from head to toe leaving her glistening and sparkling under the lighting popping, twerking, and putting all others to shame. It was only a few seconds long, but Andre played it on a loop completely enchanted. I could tell what he was looking at from the expression on his face. There were insert closeups of that monster clapping in slow motion splashing oil everywhere.

"GIMME THAT PHONE!!" Shawnee snatched the phone staring at it with similar results. I chuckled when she tossed the phone at me like a projectile, angrily smirking.

"You trying to start some shit, ain't you?"

"Why yes Shawnee; I am trying to start some shit." Shawnee chortled that angry sort of sister girl burst of anxious laughter covering her mouth with a hand, fanning herself with the other. I probably should've been alarmed when Andre placed a hand on her shoulder, but I wasn't.

"Motherfucker."

"I'm trying to make some money too; Don't you wanna make some money Shawnee?" Andre extended his arm around her shoulders drawing Shawnee closer. It took her a moment to calm down, still fanning herself.

"What's the deal?"

"Badonkadunk vs. Mega Badonkadunk." I motioned towards her indicating that I acknowledged her superior stats.

"WHAT?"

"I want you guys to battle online; I want a badonkadunk battle for fucking supremacy." I reiterated making Shawnee's brow furrow.

"Like a, fucking rap battle? Is that what you're talking about nigga?"

"Watch that shit; and uhm, yeah a battle for the title." A weird smirk started to form on her juvenile features as Andre grinned.

"Let me see that shit again." I handed Shawnee my phone allowing her to watch the clip for an extended period of time before she dropped it between her massive thighs biting her lower lip.

"I'm bigger than her, way bigger."

"So what's that supposed to mean to me, Shawnee?"

"What do you think it means; I'll wreck that bitch!" Her bravado surged as expected with added encouragement in a little hug from Andre.

"All in, Shawnee?" I offered my hand.

"ALL ASS, MISTER D!!"

Shawnee snatched my hand drawing me half off the couch with an unexpected display of strength. The look on her face was criminally masculine. If I didn't know better, I'd think she was planning a drive by on Chi Town Thunda. Andre was snickering in favor of his girl, likely feeling the same way as I fished out my original laptop computer and the dual cameras. I knew an opportunity when I saw one at this point. Shawnee opened a beer chugging it in moments while her beau watched my progress setting up. Andre even plugged my laptop into the wall socket. I was still a bit cautious around him.

"Hey Shawnee, if you're gonna do this; ain't gonna be no half stepping from here on out. I wanna get some footage and uh, I'm gonna set up a few social media pages for you too. But right now, I need some footage of that phenomenal ass, if Andre doesn't mind?"

"HE AIN'T RUNNING SHIT UP IN HERE!!" Shawnee couldn't help herself.

"Yeah but I still wanna know if he's cool with it anyway." I reiterated realizing the danger of a jacked up simp running wild in a fit of jealousy. Shawnee looked offended at my assertion turning to her designated boy toy.

"Andre get your ass up." Her towering companion stood up on command.

"HEY WHAT, ARE YOU DOING?!!"

Shawnee snatched down his boxer briefs right in front of me instantly receiving a slap to her rounded cheek by his emerging dong. It was sudden, jarring and I could've done without the visual of this horrifically giant uncut cock. She wasn't done exposing her FWB, quickly taking the upper portion of his cock between her stretched out lips. Her chubby fist handled the middle of Andre's shaft using three pudgy fingers to roughly stroke him to full hardness in seconds. The excess skin on his member puffed between her fingers as she got sloppy with loud audible slurps, spitting on his cock intermittently.

"HURRY UP AND FILM THIS SHIT, MEDIUM D!!" Shawnee broke contact long enough to yell at me.

"Sorry man, she get like this when we party." Andre offered contritely.

I didn't know what to say to that, shrugging as I started filming anyway. Shawnee was in the zone already now using both hands to stroke her unclaimed beau in jerky motions towards her stuffed mouth. This wasn't the subdued action I'd received upon our initial hookup and filming.

She was really getting into it slathering saliva all over this guy's knob with what looked like a cow's tongue visible at certain points. These giant veins started to sprout on Andre's anaconda, for lack of a better description. He seemed to forget I was there cupping the ide of Shawnee's head like a basketball. I was getting some awesome footage just going with it while the incidental stunt cock got topped off spectacularly.

"UNNGGHHHH, FUUHHHH, FUUUUKKKK!!" Andre groaned in distressed fashion as Shawnee popped her lips, continuing to slurp hard enough to make her pudgy cheeks vacuum inward.

Shawnee continued playing her towering partner like a flute stroking away from her lips while bobbing and rocking her head. His enormous member was swollen looking to be nearly the circumference of a beer can. Her eyes were tightly squinted, face flushed to reddened extremes as his hips began rock and shake. I noticed a muted indentation in her throat from the tip of Andre's cock. Both of them quickly began perspiring as the slurps got louder and wetter with rivulets of saliva oozing down her chin.