Maximum Badonkadonk Ch. 13

Her palm collided with my face in a loud pancake slap.

"Don't."

Tressie Fisher's face was completely flushed with streams of tears running down her cheeks. She started sobbing uncontrollably while I watched stone faced, left cheek throbbing and stinging from the pain. Tressie didn't want me sullying the name of her man. She got up with this sort of jerky movement looking unsure of what to do with herself as I took my seat not even looking at her beginning to open my stuffed inbox.

"None of this ever happened, nothing between us other than the fake church shit; go back to your life and do whatever you want, pretend, live your best life, actress. Feel free to let yourself out Ms. Fisher."

I found almost double the emails, way more than earlier hoping to find at least one more candidate for what I was surreptitiously building after my other site had been pirated away.

"Hey." Tressie was still there, her voice directly behind me.

"We're done here; we don't have anymore business, but I'll keep faking it to keep up the lie you told my mother. When Saturday rolls around, I'll hit up the mall or a movie."

"Hey." She called out again.

"Get the fuck out of my house Tressie."

I kept typing away working on the assignment given by my boss Steven. Now that I'd gone through a shitload of drama, I was keen on getting back into the swing of things already trying to figure out how to offset Carlie Kelly's bullshit. I figured there was no reason why the same online model that brought down Officer Douchebag wouldn't work on Ms. Kelly.

But then again, Carlie had infamous baby mamma number two as her backup. I went to my android calling up the pic sent to me by Charity. Even in a photo, those slanted malevolent eyes bore into me.

"LOOK AT ME!!!" Tressie suddenly screamed hysterically out of nowhere as loud as she could manage. It shocked me nearly to death as I flinched and swiveled about in my chair facing her.

Tressie Fisher was completely naked; her clothing in a heap at her feet.

"No."

"I don't want it to be this way between us; please don't hate me. I really didn't mean to get involved with William, but it just happened. Please, just be my friend again; I'll let you do whatever you want to me one last time, but I love him. We uhm, help each other and I uh, think I need it more than anything. Won't you fuck me one more time and stop hating me? I'm not bad, not evil really; I was hurt because nobody cared that I got-taken by Pastor Grey. I uhm, just told William last night and we, uhm cried together. Please don't be angry with me, I'll do it anyway you want. Come on, fuck me real good; I want to make it up to you because it wasn't fair what I did to you the last time."

"Tressie, put your clothes on."

She was sort of rocking side to side vertically, visibly shivering with unbridled emotion. Her forearm covered her breasts kind of mashing them against her chest while her other hand covered her muff in a demureness that should've outraged me considering our shared sexual history.

"I'll do it really; we can do it as much as you want just one more time, but please don't hate me." I got up walking in her direction as she started trembling even more looking as if she were experiencing a meltdown.

"I understand Tressie; I don't hate you." I yanked the comforter from my bed wrapping it around her nude body.

"But you don't want to be my friend."

"I think we're cool; maybe you should focus on your relationship, okay?" I sat her down on the edge of my bed softly caressing her hair for a second or two. Tressie opened the blanket revealing her enormous breasts, but I tugged it closed cupping her chin.

"You can do it; I want us to be even."

"We are Tressie; you're a good friend and I have to be too. I wanna tell you a secret, but only if you promise to keep it between us. Can you do that, huh Tressie?"

She nodded.

"I'm trying to help Vicky."

"Uhm, I don't understand." She sniffled redoubling her grip on the blanket covering her body.

"The last time we saw one another, I told her I didn't want to know her secret. I just wanted us to stay together and figure out what we were doing. It's crazy because we didn't know each other for a long time, fuck we just uh, met as you know. She got blackmailed and fucked over because of me and I'm trying to fix it."

"How?"

"Well uh, I know this lawyer who kind of wanted to help me out when I got in trouble with a crooked cop, but I already took care of that asshole for Vicky. So I asked him to represent her and we've been trying to work something out with the courts to cut down on her time. It's kind of tricky, he told me she got into a fight her first week there, actually a couple of fights."

Tressie's eyes widened as her mouth hung open.

"That was you? I thought her lawyer was taking it pro bono for charity or something! You got my cousin a high powered lawyer and I've been thinking you just said fuck her because of what she was doing to put food on her table!! I was so mad at you; that's really why I asked Phoebe to give you that letter from Vicky!! Did you read it?"

"I can't right now Tressie."

"WHY?!!"

I knew I didn't have an answer that made sense and that my lack of said answer might infuriate Tressie to no end. I couldn't tell her that barely touching the letter caused me such unbearable turmoil. In my mind it wasn't time to open it yet because I hadn't dealt with our mutual nemesis, infamous baby mamma number two. Tressie sat there wrapped in my comforter waiting for an answer I didn't want to give.

"I'm not ready yet; I'm gonna pull the door up so you can get dressed. Go find your happiness and uh, remember Charity is a human being too." I pulled the door up leaving her there in my room finding a seat on the couch in my living room. I didn't want her to see my hands shaking.

I got my phone out finding a new text chock full of emojis from Yoli.

"Just what the doctor ordered; I've been missing you." I texted back getting an instant response like she'd been sitting there with her phone diligently waiting for a response.

A feminine thinking emoticon appeared on the face of my phone.

"It's been a little crazy lately and I miss having you around. "

A lust emoticon appeared with two big hearts for eyes followed by a blushing and kissing versions. I felt a little guilty knowing I might've called Yoli up if she were available, then felt even worse when my mind shifted to Charity Gilbert. I wondered if maybe, she was filling the selfish roll I'd inadvertently pushed on a guilt-ridden Yoli as a simple question mark appeared on the face of my phone.

"Sorry, guess I'm not respecting you like we talked about when you were in the hospital. I really hope you're doing okay."

The question mark appeared again.

"It's nothing, just a little lonely right now and uh, some of my friends are kind of acting like the shitty people at your old place of work. I'm just saying that everything has been so different since I met you and sometimes I wish it was different so that we could've had a chance."

The question mark appeared again next to a sad faced emoticon. Before I could answer, I heard Tressie walking up the corridor planting my phone face down on the coffee table. She hung at the entrance to my living room staring intently at me for a few seconds as I got up with the intent of letting her out. Tressie unexpectantly wrapped her arms around me in a deep hug.

"It's okay Tressie." I lightly patted her back instead of reciprocating.

"You understand, right?"

"Yeah, I think I do; so what now Tressie?"

"I just wanna be happy with him; I want to make him happy in any and every way humanly possible. I wasn't lying when I told you we kind of accidentally found one another. The last time we were together, I didn't know what we were, William and I; but now I can feel it everyday when I open my eyes. Nothing will keep us apart now; thank you so much for understanding."

"Come on girl, you gotta hit the road and bag that man; oh, and you've gotta work it out with his daughter too. He's a package deal whether you like it or not."

"You like her, don't you?"

"She's a friend."

"Is that why you won't read Vicky's letter; afraid you might have to choose?"

"No."

Tressie took both of my hands bringing them up to her lips kissing my knuckles lightly. There were still lingering tears running down her cheeks, but she was smiling brightly in a way I'd never seen. I reached over opening the front door allowing the remaining vestiges of sunlight to flow in like an ethereal beacon.

"Go, be happy."

"So, we okay now right; you're not gonna change your mind and expose me, right?" The question struck me odd.

"You just deleted all of your stuff, its gone Tressie."

"I hope so, getting that clip really set me off this afternoon."

"Huh?"

"Yeah, somebody sent me a clip from your page and nothing else; I thought you did it because I treated you badly that night, but you didn't fuck me. Then, I knew you were really okay after all."

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED?!!"

"I uhm, was just going with the flow, kind of wanted to see if you were doing it to me. Hey, I guess I was just scared you'd hold all that footage over my head, so I thought you wanted to have revenge sex with me. I'm so sorry about thinking the worst of you; it's just that I saw my life going into the toilet. I thought I was gonna lose it all."

"Do you still have that clip?"

"Uhm, yeah."

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT?!!" Before I could look at the clip both of us were suddenly disturbed by the shrill, enraged voice of Charity Gilbert.

She was standing on the other side of the screen door frozen mid-knock looking at both of us collectively. Her face reflected her thoughts at the sight of me and a visibly disheveled Tressie Fisher. Her phone was quickly in hand obviously filming both of the people she thought were betraying not only her, but her father.

"CHARITY WAIT, IT'S NOT!!!" I pushed open the screen door but she quickly launched her foot into it hitting me dead in the face.

Tressie panicked pushing on the door encountering another violent shove that stopped her for a second. The strength of Hercules reared its ugly head allowing Tressie to shove the screen door open with enough force to shove Charity back a step or two.

"YOU DID THIS TO ME!! YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE!!"

Charity screamed at the top of her lungs surprising both of us when she quickly jumped over the banister landing on the grass just inside my hedges. Tressie half stumbled down the stairs never breaking stride with the intent of grabbing her rival, but Charity took off running as fast as she could by the time I was halfway down the stairs. I glimpsed her running into the alley behind my garage.

"CATCH HER, SHE'S GONNA TELL!!" Tressie had unfortunately stumbled over because of her attire as I ran past her into the alley finding Charity nowhere to be seen.

It was like she disappeared into thin air. I turned back finding Tressie jumping behind the wheel of her car burning rubber in a wide arching U-turn right into the alley. She nearly clipped me as she sped past in hot pursuit of Charity. I went for my phone, but remembered it was on the living room coffee table.

I ran back to the house snatching up my phone frantically dialing up Charity as I sped out of the house slamming the door behind me. Of course I was blocked as I took off running down the street and the adjacent alley. I made it to the other end of the block my heart almost bursting before I thought to call up Phoebe.

"Hey, you guys finally got together, huh?" Phoebe sounded glib having obviously already talked to Charity Gilbert beforehand.

"PHOEBE, I NEED YOU TO CALL CHARITY!!" I blurted out screaming in her ear panicked.

"What did you do?"

"CAN YOU PLEASE JUST CALL HER AND PUT US ON A THREE WAY LINE?!!" I begged barely able to form words.

"She was going to your house to be with you; said she didn't wanna wait; did you hurt her? WAS THERE ANOTHER GIRL OVER THERE?!!"

"IT WAS A MISUNDERSTANDING!! PHOEBE CALL HER, I NEED TO TALK TO HER RIGHT NOW!!" I was leaning against one of my neighbor's backyard fence physically taxed, desperate to get in touch with Charity.

"DID YOU HAVE A FUCKING GIRL, OVER THERE?!!" Phoebe screamed into my ear.

"Yeah, but we weren't doing anything, I was trying..."

"FUCK YOU!!" Phoebe hung up in my face screaming like a banshee.

She was definitely feeling her friend's pain too much to listen to me. I didn't know where Charity Gilbert was, but I knew Tressie Fisher was out there driving around hunting her down. I didn't want to think about what would happen if she found Charity.

Visions of them brawling all over the streets drenched in blood came to mind as I tried calling Phoebe up again finding myself blocked.

I had an epiphany half running back to my house with a slight limp. I managed to get inside ignoring the gathered neighbors outside who'd got one hell of a show. I found the burner phone given to me by a now broken hearted woman. I cried out in joy when her number began ringing.

"CHARITY WAIT, JUST LISTEN TO ME!!" I screamed desperately as soon as she answered.

"I WAS COMING TO YOU!! I WAS COMING TO BE WITH YOU!! YOU COULDN'T WAIT ONE FUCKING DAY FOR ME!!" Charity was inconsolable, her words becoming unintelligible gibberish until it sounded more like she was choking instead of speaking.

"WAIT YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, I WAS!!" Charity ended the call and I knew better than to call her back.

It felt like my world was imploding again for the second time. I was at once helpless again in a place I didn't want to be as I glanced around my room breathing hard. My hands started trembling, shaking with rage at the heavens above for this bit of karmic backlash washing over me. It was sort of an out of body experience for me as I watched myself trashing my bedroom before sliding down the wall staring out into space.

I buried my face in my hands frustrated with nothing left. I wanted to fight, do something, do anything; but it was out of my control ultimately as my eyes settled on my computer. The work email was staring me in the face from its screen as another thought crept into my head. I righted my chair finishing up the list of suggestions for the film festival at my school.

I found a couple of beers in the fridge and downed them trying in vain to force my mind elsewhere knowing one way or another, there was another big shoe out there waiting to drop. I got in bed fully clothed nursing my last beer staring up at the ceiling as night came outside.

My mother hadn't returned home and I wondered which girl she would prefer finding in my bed if she did. I thought about my run-in with Carlie Kelly and the likelihood that I might be outed at school. The list I submitted contained some crazy suggestions four out of five with that fifth an emotional plea of sorts.

My trashed bedroom slowly darkened. I didn't feel like getting up to switch on the light.

I ran things back and forth in my head countless times trying to figure out where I went wrong finally settling on blaming myself for letting Tressie into my home. Her desperation and touchy feely nature threw me off when I should've been getting to the bottom of things.

Tressie already cast me as some sort of despicable villain in her mind, some degenerate willing to blackmail her for sex to keep a secret thrust upon me. There was no doubt she had come to trade sex for silence until it was too late. No matter what, I wouldn't make the same mistake twice. Now, it was a simple waiting game to see where these new chips fell.

Two hours later by my estimate, my phone was ringing incessantly out of nowhere on the floor of my bedroom.

"Hello?" My foot nudged my android as I sat up on the edge of my mattress.

"It's over."

"Tressie, what happened?" There was a finality already in her voice and this weird sort of hollow background noise.

"I'm outside on the side of your house." She hung up.

My other shoe had arrived and who was I to keep it waiting. It was half past ten in the evening as I trudged to the front door to find out what happened. This time, I mindfully pulled up and locked my front door unsure of what to expect.

She was a mess leaning on my fence facing my adjacent backyard. Tressie had a bottle taking deep swigs from it as she glanced at me suddenly becoming animated.

"IT'S OVER!"

She took a deep swig from the bottle letting the arm holding it drop loosely on the opposite side of the fence like some wino. Tressie looked as if she would swoon using the fence to stand upright, her blazer missing and long sleeved blouse drenched with alcohol making it nigh translucent.

I was reticent from the shock of seeing her so disheveled and defeated. Tressie wiped an arm across her mouth letting it drop as she stared at me completely flushed. I stood there just looking at her face watching as she took another swig of liquid courage.

"He dumped me; doesn't want me anymore, but its cool, right?" She turned in clear emotional agony giving me a view of her profile as her free hand loosely hung and tugged at the front of her blouse. Tressie fanned herself a bit.

"I don't know what to say Tressie." I mumbled taking a step closer. Tressie perked up but let her head roll loosely in my direction. It almost seemed as if it could fall from her shoulders as she grinned in my face. Tressie was breathing through her mouth.

"You ain't gotta say nothing man; it s all GUD, YEAH I'M DOING JUST FINE!! He dumped me, just ended it. But I didn't get to tell him anything because of his BITCH DAUGHTER!! SHE TOLD HIM!! I KNOW IT!! Fucking cunt, after everything!! He dumped me like trash!! Am I a piece of garbage; is that what I am nigga?!!"

Her car keys were hanging from the pinkie finger of the hand holding the bottle.

"Hey, let's talk about it inside Tressie." I knew I had to get those keys as she suddenly glared at me, almost falling over onto her face.

"I'm done talking, wanna fuck?"

Her blouse was open revealing her sweaty bare breasts. Tressie looked down at her exposed cleavage grinning crazily, then arched her back in my direction making the short halves part further. Her flat stomach and the beginnings of her hips came into view out in public.

"Come on, I wanna give you some coffee." Tressie started chuckling letting her head rock backward on her shoulders staring up at the night sky.

"BULL-SHIT!! You're gonna fuck, right?!! Fuck my thrown away pussy, right nigga?!! I DON'T WANT NO FUCKING COFFEE!! I WANT SOME DICK RIGHT NOW!!" It was dark outside but I was worried somebody would show up, more worried she might stalk off and run into some guys who would be less than discerning.

"Come on Tressie, let's go inside." She started snickering raising the bottle to her lips.

I made a play for the keys, but she was too quick jumping backwards nearly falling over. The insane grin on her flushed face and her random outbursts had me worried a neighbor or two might phone the police. I kept moving in her direction while Tressie walked backward trying to lose her blouse. Her breasts were exposed under the street lights as I rushed forward getting some of the liquid thrown in my face while she laughed.

"Yeah fuck me, COME ON BABY!!!"

Tressie fumbled with the waistband of her denim skirt beginning to shimmy out of it revealing her narrow waist and wide hips. She settled forcing and walking the material down her shapely gams exposing some black bikini panties covering her virtue.

"TRESSIE STOP!!"

I forward jostling with the inebriated woman who poured a good portion of the bottle all over my head before shoving me with all of her might. My actions ended up accidentally stripping her lower half as my right foot caught in the material causing me to faceplant on the concrete.