Mittens The Voyeur Cat

This story was written for the 750 Word Project 2024. The story below is exactly 750 words.

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I was just doing what I normally do: sleeping. Curled up in a cozy, warm ball on my favorite spot at the foot of the bed. Just killing time between lunch and dinner.

Then my human came bursting through the door in quite the tizzy, apparently tangled up rather badly with another of her species, a male by the scent.

The two couldn't seem to disconnect from each other, even as the fur substitutes they wore came flying off, landing scattered around the room. And she has the nerve to yell at me for shedding!

The last of their fake fur finally removed, they collapsed on the bed, almost making me have to actually move. Although of course I didn't. Because I was here first.

Her new friend was definitely a male, and by the state of him, I assumed she must be in heat.

Or maybe just hungry, judging by the way she was trying to swallow his sex organ. Strange,I didn't think humans ate their own.

He didn't seem to mind though. Nor did she when he flipped her around and began lapping at her genitals too.

I always assumed the milk glands for humans were in those large, fleshy orbs suspended from her chest, but hey, what do I know? I'm just a cat; certainly no expert on human anatomy.

She was certainly mewling like a newborn kitten. Then it dawned on me: since humans couldn't lick their own privates, they must be grooming each other! Now it made sense!

I had just started dozing off when the male rolled her over again. Just because I'm a cat doesn't mean I don't recognize Doggie Style when I see it. They were rutting alright, and making quite the ruckus!

My human wasn't just mewling, she was howling. Yep, she was definitely in heat. And letting every other human in our apartment building know about it.

Unable to continue my cat nap due to the now almost ultrasonic squeals my human was releasing, I decided I may as well groom myself since it was now on my mind.

"What's wrong, Mike? Why'd you stop?"

"Your cat is on the bed."

"So?"

"So? It's licking its own ass! It's weird and distracting!"

"Mittens! Bad girl! Shoo!"

I ignored her of course. Humans often forget who's in charge, so of course I reminded her by continuing my grooming.

They resumed their mating ritual; my human now on her back, legs high as the male mounted himself over her.

The bed shook as they went at it, the sounds of their pale, pink flesh slapping together making me want to cough up a hairball.

Speaking of hairballs, it looked like someone had coughed one up on the male human's anal cavity. I guess humans did grow some fur after all.

I broke from my ritual grooming to watch as they continued their copulation. My ears perked up when I spotted the two bouncy, furry items dangling from between the male's legs. My eyes darted back and forth rapidly, trying to keep up with each wiggling movement.

We're those... mice? Yes, I was almost sure of it. Why else would there be so much squeaking going on?

I decided I must examine this further. Finding my paws, I crept slowly closer, back arched, ears pinned back, my eyes locked on target.

When I was within distance... I pounced!

An ear splitting shriek filled the room as the male leapt off my human.

"Oh my God! Mike! What happened?"

"Your fucking cat! IT CLAWED MY BALLS!"

"What??? Oh, fuck! You okay?"

"No! I'm not okay! My balls are fucking bleeding!"

"Oh fuck! Hold still, let me get some gauze, or a band-aid, or..."

"A band-aid? For my balls? Jesus, Laura, just get me some toilet paper or..... ahhh, fuck this stings!"

Hey, honest mistake. He should have known better than to dangle those things in front of a proud hunter such as myself.

After cleaning up the mess and putting his fake fur back on, the male human stormed out angrily.

My human sat beside me on the bed, dejected. "Dammit, Mittens. First guy I've brought home in six months and you had to ruin it."

Sighing, she reached into her dresser drawer. "Guess it's just me and my vibrator tonight."

Settling back on the bed, my human began her ritual while I gave the rest of my fur a good cleaning.

Just make it quick, human. For I will soon demand sustenance.